So Excited For This! Please Join Us Tomorrow If You Can!!! #largefears

Dear followers, what you see here is an issue taking place in the heart of South Africa. Now, I’ve been debating for sometime now on whether to make this post or not. Time and time again, I’ve thought “but this doesn’t appeal to them. My followers are not South African”. And it finally dawned on me today that, it doesn’t matter whether you’re South African or not. This is a revolution the youth of my country are fighting for. And it’s not an issue that any other country hasn’t faced. I am sick and tired of sitting back and have CNN and world news stations send me countless updates on the Rugby World Cup and news of a single psychopath killing at least one person in Sweden when the whole youth of SA is in uproar against the corruption and apathy of our government. People around the world should be exposed to this kind of activity, regardless of where it is. If anything, I find this situation very similar to that of the #BlackLivesMatter movement in the states. So please take the time to read this and share it. You can have your own opinions on the matter, but at least don’t be ignorant to what happening around you in the world. This could be your country one day. 

All across South Africa, tertiary education systems have been shut down due to protests against tuition fees increases. Many people are in dire situations and consequently cannot afford the 10% increases of fees  every year and as a result get financially excluded, thus ending any opportunity of education that they are entitled to. Now I know that this is an economical issue that the government has to sort out and South Africa has had economical issues for quite sometime but it has taken way too long for the people of this country to realise that the government is spending BILLIONS of rands on trivial things such as nuclear deals, VIP jets, Etoll projects in addition to losses from inadequate handling of petrol and post office companies. This money could’ve been used to fund millions of students across the country and their education but yet the government continues to horde it and act like nobody notices what they’re doing with our tax money. I do not agree with the mentality that “if you cannot afford it, then don’t go to university” or even “you should work harder for what you want”. Whilst these arguments each have their own backing, I don’t believe that students should have their opportunities taken away simply because our government is run by greedy pigs exploiting the people of this country for their money. 

The pictures above are only a squint at the events taking place nationwide. Yesterday, thousands of students marched to Parliament in Cape Town city centre in order to have our voices heard. Instead, we were met with the apathetic attitude of our ministers, and even our own president refused to show face and address the crowd. The march was meant to be peaceful, but when the students furthered demanded response from government, they set the police on the crowd and chaos ensued. Rubber bullets, stun grenades, tear gas, armed forces, army brigade worth armour were all used. The level of police brutality on students was absolutely disgusting. How can they respond in such a manner when all we did was demand our voices be heard? When all we want is our right to fair and equal education? Several students were arrested and charged with ‘terrorism’ and ‘high treason’. And now the media even has the balls to go and lie about it. The South African youth is in a dire situation here. What must we do when our own government refuses to listen to us? When the ones that are supposed to be protecting us turn and attack us? 

Again, this is only a squint at what has been happening in South Africa. Please google up on what has been happening as I don’t have the capacity to cover it all in one post. There are tons of videos and articles available. Because of all this, many students have had their rights violated, they are subjected to enormous amounts of stress especially because exams are around the corner, and some are even suffering from severe trauma from this. Nobody deserves this no matter what side of the argument they are on. 

I, as a student caught in all this have been feeling overwhelmingly sad, confused, disgusted and generally frustrated in light of the events from the past week.

Started off feeling quite positive that substantive action has been taken by brave students and that a revolution away from oppression and marginalisation is finally underway. But the way in which the authorities and other people have been reacting to the movement makes me extremely upset.

I apologise for the long post and the rant, and I’ll probably lose followers for this but all I ask from you guys, is that you share this and inform others around the world of what’s happening. That you stand in solidarity with us. Don’t just like the post, reblog it too! If our own government will not listen to us, then maybe international pressure will do something. Help us have our voices heard. 

#FeesMustFall #ANCMustFall #NationalShutdown 

photo creds to Imraan Christian

Storm by Julian Totino

Micro-aggressions, Unpacking privilege, and The Knee Jerk Response

Micro-aggressions happen all the time. Everyday. Even by people you think are your allies. For example: Black woman says:  I am so upset about the violence against the Black community. White LGBTQIA woman responds: What about the LGBTQIA community? What about violence against us? This is a micro-aggression. This is an invalidation of the Black Woman’s statement even though the White woman is right about violence in the LGBTQIA community. However, by co-opting the conversation, by making it about her own marginalization at that immediate moment, she has asserted her white privilege and any chance for a conversation ends abruptly. To be a good ally, we must learn to listen and support each other when people who are hurting are talking. Your time to talk will come soon enough, but don’t take it at the expense of others. Don’t let your privilege co-opt a conversation on race. I will give you a more personal example. I grew up during the race riots between the Korean American and Black community in NYC. My parents owned a store and we lived in the apartment above it. It was a scary time. At school I got into an argument with a Black classmate. She said it was incredibly hard being Black and having to deal with racism. In my young, resentful and admittedly self-centered mind, I didn’t like what she said. So I responded – “Well Korean Americans get hate and racism from both the Black and White communities.” That was a blatant micro-aggression. I invalidated her by pushing my marginalization over hers. And I was completely wrong. But at that time, I was unaware of my privilege. In my mind, my marginalization – being Asian – was just as bad as being Black. I was so wrong. Now I know that I have a privilege and if I I could go back in time, I would apologize to her. But I can’t and so the only thing I can do is keep learning and try my best to do better. I am Asian American, straight, cis-gender, educated, middle class. And even though I am a woman of color with invisible disabilities, I am also deeply aware of my privilege, because I am a woman of color who is not Black or Brown. I am also a woman with disabilities that are not visible. While these marginalizations make my life extremely difficult, I still have privilege and I must constantly remind myself to never forget that. It is not easy, and it is not supposed to be. But you check your privilege because it is the right thing to do. To be a good ally. Recently, I have noticed a troubling trend among white allies who, perhaps unknowingly, talk over and invalidate WOC by playing their own individual marginalization card. And in general, I’ve noted that it always comes on the heels of Black Women talking about race and intersectionality. This troubles me deeply because it causes resentment. It also bothers me when other WOC (especially other Asian women) aren’t as supportive of Black Women as they should be. I saw this happen in an online group, a good friend of mine (who is Black) tried to speak on race and found her whole discussion derailed in a heavy pile on by white marginalized feminists who co-opted the conversation. It was so frustrating that I posted the Huffington post video on White Feminism with this statement, “I think this video should be mandatory viewing for everyone especially because sometimes I think white feminists who are also LGBTQIA+ or disabled forget that intersectionality applies to WOC also, and that no matter what your marginalization is you have never experienced not being white. And if that statement makes you mad, you need to think about why.“

What I received back was a whole lot of angry Knee Jerk reactions. And what I mean by that is the “How dare she try to tell me that my marginalization is not as important as hers!” “How dare she try to police diversity!” “How dare she not check her privilege!” “How dare how dare how dare…” I call this a Knee Jerk reaction because these are not all bad people. These are people who are invested in the diversity movement themselves. So they are not the enemy. And yet they responded with a knee jerk reaction to being called out on having white privilege. But instead of getting so angry, accusing me of being a bully, demanding that I be banned and reported (for what, asserting my opinion?), and trying to silence me, they should have done exactly what I asked in that last sentence. They needed to think about why it made them so uncomfortable. They needed to reflect on their own privilege. What they did instead, was focus on their own marginalization as if it somehow negates their white privilege. The problem is that nothing negates white privilege. The poorest, most marginalized white person in the country will still not have the racist issues that the Black community faces. They will not be poisoned knowingly by their government. They will not live in fear that the police will kill their young children and never be punished. They do not have to worry about having the highest incarceration numbers in the land, simply because of the color of their skin. They do not have to worry about the school to prison pipeline because of inadequate resources in public schools. But because these issues do not actually affect white feminist’s personal lives, it is easy to focus solely on their own individual problems. After the responses so vividly proved my point, I left the group because I cannot stay where people believe that silencing the voices of POC instead of promoting open discourse is ever acceptable. Of course, this is not the first time I have been silenced and made to feel unwelcome by white feminists. Truth is this is commonplace for WOC. But it hurts more when it is done by people who say they are our allies.

I know that I will receive hate mail and harassment, but on this I feel too strongly to stay quiet. Because I stand in solidarity with the Black community. And we all need to speak out when wrong is wrong. The thing is, if a white person’s response to someone talking about White Privilege is to say “I’m marginalized too!” then they don’t get it. Because that is, essentially, how privilege works. It wants to take over the conversation and invalidate other people’s struggles. And if your response to that is “why is race more important?” I want to point you to one of my new favorite blogs -Reading While White. They address this very issue as follows:

This is a great explanation because it doesn’t say race is the most important issue, what it does is make clear is that race is the most all encompassing. That it crosses into all identities, all marginalizations. Intersectionality means that POC also exist in the LGBTQIA and disabilities communities. It affects all races, not just white people. But white privilege, even within those communities, wants to dominate. Unpacking your privilege is a hard thing. It is not easy. Nobody wants to think of themselves as being in the wrong, they’d rather think of themselves as being wronged. So you stay secure in your self-righteous indignation of “How dare yous” instead of thinking about how systemic racism and your own privilege has seeped so firmly into all aspects of your life that you can’t even see it. In order to be a good ally and make a difference in the fight for ALL OF US, we must recognize our own privileges and make a public stand to fight for what is right. But we cannot do that if our white allies don’t recognize what white privilege is and how deeply entrenched it is in our world. So I challenge white allies to really do some serious and probably very uncomfortable  self-reflection. When POC ask you to check your privilege, do you get mad and immediately demand that they check theirs? When POC talk about their experiences do you roll your eyes and snidely comment about how it’s not always about race? When someone says something racist, do you just stand there looking awkward and ignore it? When the status quo is racist, do you just accept it? When people talk about taking action, do you just nod your head in agreement and do nothing? When POC speak on oppression, do you respond with your own tale of oppression? 

In order to be a good ally, it is important to know when to speak up and when to shut up and just listen. And if you aren’t sure what to do, all you have to do is ask. How can I be a good ally to you? How can I support you? 

In conclusion, I will leave you with Daniel Jose Older’s The 5 Stages of Confronting Your Own Privilege. Here’s hoping that we can all get past number 1.

My own space

Guest Post: Romancing the Blog

Guest Post: Romancing the Blog

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Huhhhh just why

‘The Ellen Show’ seems to think black women’s bodies are hilarious 

On Monday’s Ellen DeGeneres Show, Ellen introduced what she called a “very exclusive sneak peek” of Nicki Minaj’s upcoming ABC Family sitcom based on her childhood. As the clip concluded, DeGeneres said, “They have big butts. That’s the joke.“ The entire affair, which veers into minstrel territory, played into the belittling many have tried before.

Julia Stiles was so good at playing the white privileged moron. Kerry was spitting some real shit right here..

Kerry Washington was spitting the realest shit in this movie man

Hazel Scott playing two pianos at the same damn time with ease

And just because I have a slight obsession with boys with nose rings, this one's my #mcm this week @andybvb from Black Veil Brides

Yay! So happy to announce our latest #newadult #na #eroticromance #Samepage available now on netgalley. Had so much fun writing this but nervous to how it will be perceived since it doesn't follow a "traditional" romance format. But all I can say is that it was the romance story I wanted to read and I Cant wait for The sequel which will be on in late February-early March. In the meantime time check it out on netgalley. Link is in bio!! #interracialromance #contemporary #contemporaryromance #bwwm #naromance #multicultural #multiculturalromance #bookstagram #wocinromance #booknerdigans #steamyromance #weneeddiverseromance #Nigerian #naija #newreleases bwwmromance