Chapter 6

Chapter 29

This chapter is so bad I swear but I wanted to get it done for people and I hope you like it..

Comments are most appreiciated

George's POV

A few hours after we had done what we'd done we were both sat with each other quietly just studying our own stuff with each other's company, it was peaceful and it really helped me having him there just the extra person to give you comfort, studying in my own got really boring and it was really starting to drive me insane but while he was there with me it helped a lot , every now and then I'd catch him mumbling little things to himself like "nah man your an idiot", or simple sums trying to work out his maths problems a few times I did notice him get a little frustrated and upset so I helped him through a couple of solutions on how to fix them because I know maths can be challenging and he's told me before that it was something he didn't like, but in turn he'd helped me through my English literature paper which I am eternally grateful for. Even though I was enjoying the peace and we were both getting work done there was still a little problem itching at the back of my brain that I needed to ask about. I was just scared to ask incase it wasn't my place too, but I think he could tell because in the last fifteen minutes all I'd done was stare into space or directly at him and he'd caught me a few times

"Hey my love , can I ask you something"

"If it's about maths darlin, it should be me asking you?" , I know for a fact he knows what I'm going to ask him so he's just trying to make light of the situation before it gets a little deeper

"No my love , I need to ask you about the other night" , I visibly saw him tense at the question and he dropped his pen in the desk and scrubbed his face over with his hands

"What about it gorgeous?"

"Can you tell me what happened"

"Nothing happened really , it was just a bad day", At this he picked up his pen and tried to concentrate on his work again but I could tell he was a little nervous, stressed out maybe and I don't want to be the person that causes that for him but I also don't want him to feel like he can't tell me how he's feeling. I don't want to push it I know he'll tell me in his own time but I'm worried for him. For now I just let him concentrate on his work it'll keep him focused for now but I know I'm going to worry about him. Getting back to my own work will be a challenge. I try I really do but it's hard and I can't seem to focus on it and I know he's watching me "George"

"Yeh?"

"I'm sorry, I know you worry about me but it's just if I tell you, you'll just worry more and I can't do that to you"

"My love , I understand it's difficult for you but I need you to hear me out here, we're talking and we like each other right , you would be worried if I was in the same position as you right ...", I pause for a second to let him answer which he does with a small nod. "You'd want me to tell you what was going on yeh ?" , he nods again slightly looking more sheepish and shy. "We'll then you understand that if I'm asking how things were it's because I need to know and of course I'm going to worry but it's important I know so I can help"

"I know you wanna help , it's just complicated Georgie, and I would tell you but I don't really understand why it happened , other than I was really deep in my own head"

"We'll we can start there , what were you thinking about , what was going on your head"

"There's just always so much going on my head all the time , I can't shut it up you know, it's so hard to feel comfortable when you can hear everything that's going on and theres just so much pressure in my head and it feels like I'm going to explode if I don't shut it up, and if I do explode I just get angry at everyone and I hate that , drugs or alcohol are the only way I know that makes it quiet for a little while , I can lose myself and feel like I'm not actually in my own body for a while" , Matty had shoved his books out of the way and was resting his face in his hands while his elbows dug into the desk that he was working at.

"What did you take?, it's okay if you don't want to say", I think I probably know the answer since it was only a few days ago when it happened last but if I can be more knowledgeable about how to help him when he's on a come down then it'll make things a little easier for him.

He looks a little uncomfortable, fidgeting in his seat "Coke, but I drank a bit too and I think my body just kind of shut down, because one minute I was okay and the next I felt like I was dying and that's never happened before , like you know the panic just over took me and I couldn't breath, I just thought we'll this is it , for a second I didn't mind which is the scary part"

"You...you don't ....you don't really wanna die do you"

"Not right now I don't no, but in the moment I didn't mind for just a second, I'm not going anywhere though darling I promise , I just find it hard sometimes"

"How does it feel when your on a come down , from what I know about drugs there's always a come down" I'd moved over to my bed at this point my work completely forgotten about, the bed being more comfortable.

"I either get really clingy to people cuz I'm in pain or I'm just angry and I hate that. It usually happens a couple hours after , Ross is really good at dealing with me he's been doing it a long time loads more times than he should really, I mean I'm always clingy so I'd understand that he can deal with that but when I'm angry he deals with it so we'll I couldn't ask for anyone better"

I know Ross is his best friend but I still couldn't help but resent him a little, it's maybe even jealousy that he gets to be with Matty as much as he wants he can just go see him anytime he likes, sees him at his best and can help him through his worse. Ross is amazing from what I've seen over the weekend he's a wonderful guy and I'm glad that Matty had someone but I'm just envy him a little. I must be thinking about it harder than I thought I was because Matty pulls me out of my thoughts "Georgie ??"

"Mmm?"

"What're you thinking about darling? , you were very deep in thought just then"

"I just wish I could be there , wish I could be the one you could rely on when your feeling like that"

"Trust me if you knew how it was really , you wouldn't want to even be near me, it just makes everyone around me upset and it's so bleak and dark for ages" I can see his eyes have begun to look glassy and I really don't want him to cry right now because it'll break my heart.

"My love trust me , I wanna help no matter how dark it gets . I'm here okay, We can talk about something else if you like" , I notice him shrug but only minutely if I wasn't paying close attention I wouldn't have noticed at all.

"No it's okay , I'm seeing my doctor on Monday so I'm going to have to figure out how to talk about it"

"We can do something else for a while though if you need , watch a movie or something take your mind off of it , maybe watch some more game of thrones I know we liked that " I watch him look up from where he'd been boaring a whole into the floor and faintly smiles at me "would you like that love ?" , Matty nodes calmly and wanders off to his bed and brings me with him as he settles

I let him get comfortable as he pulls his duvet around him even though it's only 3pm and cuddles up with his cozy cardigan again then I set up the show for us so he doesn't have too and can just stay settled up in his own little world "you look so cosy my love ", he just smile at me sweetly and nods to me as the show begins , the theme tune breaking through my room brings me a lot of joys , I know I've only just watched a few episodes with him but this feels like our thing and it makes me happy as well as the fact I can see it makes him happy aswell , he's so cute just softly bobbing his head along to it the episode plays as we both lay there basking in the events of the show , stealing glances every so often like we usually do. As the next episode begins I can see his eyes start to drift closed as he grip on the cardigan looks to be getting tighter. It makes me smile to no end watching him lose himself to sleep and not fighting it.

"George", I wasn't expecting him to speak as I thought he was half asleep and looked to far gone to even acknowledge that I was still there

"Yea my love?", I was also not expecting the next words to fall out of his mouth.

"I'm scared" , hearing that leave his lips as he drifts of to sleep makes me pause the show and sit up a little straighter. So I can concentrate on him and him only.

"Of what my love?"

" my brain", this comes out as more of a sigh mumbled as if he's not even aware he's speaking, sleep talking maybe but I still have to check if he really knows that he's talking

" why?"

Matty rolls over to lay on his back still gripping his cardigan his hair slowly falling over his face as he shuffles around to get comfortable. He must have been sleep talking as I don't get a reply, my first instinct was to text Ross to see if he's knows if Matty talks in his sleep. So I take out my phone and find him on instagram

George : You bro , does Matty talk in his sleep by any chance

I busy myself doing more work and cleaning my room while I wait for Ross' message, I pick up the pile of dirty clothes and bring it down to the kitchen leaving it in front of the washer as I'm not finished taking things down. Next to come down is the dirty coffee cups and a few plates that I haven't brung down. I bring the hoover upstairs with me when I go back up, I put my side of the call onto mute so as to not wake Matty then begin to hoover up my room it's such a mess up here. I never usually let it get this bad but I've been so preoccupied lately , after hoovering up my floor I take the nozzle off and hoover up the dust , ash and nicotine from my windowsill (rank I know I'm sorry ), when I've finished hoovering I take my laptop back downstairs with me to begin the washing and dishes .after loading the washing machine it takes me like ten minutes to wash my dishes leaving them on the drying rack to drip dry, my phone vibrates in my pocket

Ross : I don't know a time the lad doesn't talk, why ? Whats up ?

George : it's alright don't worry, I just couldn't tell if what he was saying meant something or not but it's okay don't worry

I slide my phone back into my pocket and turn the washing machine on, I check the dryer to see if there's clothes in there , there is so I get on with folding them into piles. Matty stirs after a little while, while I'm still folding and he sits up bolt right rubbing his eyes "huh?" , I move over swiftly to my laptop and unmute myself

"Hey hey hey , what is it?"

"G..G....G...George?"

"I'm here Matty , I'm here , what's wrong"

He's still rubbing at his eyes quite roughly , and coughing a little bit. "I think I was having a nightmare but....I don't...I don't remember...falling asleep"

"You fell asleep like 30 minutes ago my love, what we're you dreaming about?"

"It was like I was alive but like also dead and I was just walking around and like when I tried to speak to someone I either couldn't speak or if I could they weren't hearing me or they were just choosing to ignore me , not that scary I understand but it just freaked me out"

"Maybe it's because you struggle to talk to people and you brains just trying to show you how scary it can get"

"Maybe , what are you doing ?" , I know he's just trying to change the subject so he doesn't have to talk for now I'll let him out of talking. I bring my laptop over to the middle island in the kitchen and set it up so he can see that I'm cleaning up and I get back to folding the clothes.

"I just finished cleaning my room, but now I'm just cleaning up for mum"

"Awww mummies boy are we ?"

"Are you not?", the smile he gives back in response , goofy and lopsided like he's a puppy trying to understand humans. "What's that face for ?"

"You really are, aren't you?"

"Am what?"

"Mr Perfect"

Facedown - Matty Healy

A/N: I don't shag men irl, so soz if there are any inaccuracies regarding the ins and outs of anal xx thank you to my mates @beforeyougo-turnthebiglightoff, @man-im-so-high and @awellposhmagazine for indulging in my stupid questions and mental breakdowns in the GC❤️

wc: 7k

content warnings: smut, fluff, dirty talk, pegging, praise, also a bit of degradation depending on how you look at it use of sex toys (strap), mentions of lingerie/matty in womens clothing, sex shops, spit, masochism, cursing, polaroids/cameras, so picture kink?, girlie immortalizes him in a picture let it be poetic

“I want you to fuck me.” 

You choke on air. Matty is a blunt person, always has been, never really caring for beating around the bush. You didn't mind it, but you feel like he could’ve worded that a bit more eloquently. He’s laying on top of you, hair tickling the bottom of your chin, curls obstructing a bit of your vision. 

“Okay, fucking hold up, what?” you're convinced you've misheard him. Even he wouldn't be that blunt. He takes a deep breath, his tone slow and condescending

“I said, I want you to fu-” you hit him, giggling in disbelief. He jumps back in surprise, a grin spreading onto his face. He was actually serious.  

“I fucking heard what you said, jesus.” Matty has this look in his eye when he’s about to do something he knows you won't like, this glimmer in his eye, and you see it so clearly. His hand grabs your face, licking across your cheek, starting from the edge of your jaw. You squirm away, wiping your skin with your hand, throwing curses at him. 

“Fuck's sake, you're like a dog. Behave and I'll give you a treat, christ.” 

“Depends on what the treat is.” he winks at you, grinning widely as you screw your eyes shut in annoyance. He just wouldn't let up, like it would kill him to be PG for even five seconds. 

“So?” he asks, referencing his original statement.

‘I want you to fuck me.’ 

His words echo through your head, making all sorts of images flash in front of your eyes. Of course he notices, trailing his fingers up your bare arm, making goosebumps kiss your skin in his wake.

It's hard to even think straight, the suddenness of the question making your head spin. The two of you had never talked about it before, thinking it wasn't even on the table. 

“Are you- are you sure?” you stutter out, a small part of you scared he was joking, trying to see how you would react. His answer makes you sigh in relief.  

“Never be more sure.'' He's smiling, a genuine, reassuring smile. 

“Actually?” 

“No, I meant metaphysically, philosophically-” he deadpans, but it takes only a few seconds for him to crack up laughing, burying his face into your chest, trying to stifle his giggles. 

You breathe out, weaving a gentle hand through his hair, guiding him up to kiss you, lips locking as he gasps softly. You stay like that for a while, kissing and holding each other, neither wanting to let go. 

“You're mental.” you mumble when he pulls away, brushing a small strand of hair out of your eyes, sweetly tucking it behind your ear. 

“Yet, you love me.” It's so perfect. His body is warm against yours, acting as a sort of weighted blanket, pressing you into the sofa. The scent of his perfume is strong, tinged with a hint of the spliff you’d both smoked earlier.

—-------------------------------------------------------------

You can tell he’s never been in an actual sex shop by the was his eyes widen when you enter, flicking between the multitude of displays and posters, having no idea where or what to look at. His hand grasps yours, one goal in mind as you both step inside, heading towards a specific aisle. Strap-ons. 

Even if it was his first visit, he seems immediately at home, casually browsing through strap-ons and vibrators like he was in a department store, looking at lampshades or containers. At some point, you manage to break away from him, finding yourself in the lingerie section, lace and silk and satin surrounding you on all sides. Your fingers graze over a specific pair of green lace panties, the material soft to the touch. 

Your mind goes back to that night, to the memory of Matty, on your bed, shirtless and panting, the only thing concealing him a pair of lacey black womens underwear. You wonder if he’d be into it, buying more stuff like that, or if he maybe had more back home, hidden in a secret corner of his drawer. 

You're snapped back into reality by a repetitive tap on your shoulder, turning around to see it was Matty. He was holding something in his hand; a light purple, see through strap, decorated with specks of glitter and incredibly detailed. You blush at the sight, before remembering where you actually were. It looked big in his hands, intimidating almost. 

“This one’s pink and glittery! Fucking awesome, who knew they had so many types?” he booms, holding it up right in front of your face. A few people turn, but most ignore his loud proclamation, going back to their own shopping. 

“You're so girly, Jesus christ.” you snigger, stifling a crude laugh. It was so Matty, always one to pick the most extravagant, out of the ordinary, even when it came to sex toys.  

“Don’t make me fucking start-” he threatens, and you promptly cover his mouth with your palm, staring deep into his eyes. 

“Shut it.” and to your surprise, he did. 

He goes back to the isle he came from, looking for more options. You’d expected it to be more uncomfortable, but you felt light, like anything was on the table. Seeing him move out of your sight, you turn back to the fabric you’d been admiring earlier, running your fingers over it, and out of the corner of your eye, something shiny catches your attention. Garters. 

Your core stirs at the thought of Matty in garters, maybe even stockings or heels. You wonder if he’d even be into it, or if that was where his adventures in femininity ended. Lost in your fantasies, you don't even realize you’d picked something up. A black garter, little heart details making it sparkle in the low light of the shop, leather and metal cool against your skin. 

“Oh?” you hear a teasing voice say from behind, making you jump slightly. Clutching the object between your fingers, you spin around, eyes meeting Matty’s, and he has this filthy grin on his face, knowing he’s caught you.

“What's this?” he takes it from your hand, looking at it closely. His eyes light up when he realizes what it is, or more, who it's for. Matty’s ego inflates as he dangled in front of you, relishing in your flustered reaction, a blush creeping onto your face. 

“Is this meant for me?” he asks, pressing it onto his thigh over his jeans, trying to figure out how it would look. He moves to the mirror located off to the side to get a better look, admiring himself in the mirror.

“You don't have to- it's just an idea.” you say defensively, scared he’ll find it weird or odd or-

“It's a wonderful one. Do tell me more, darling.” his hand trails up your arm, landing on your shoulder. You don't have time to react as he pulls you in for a kiss, short and hot. A suggestion.

You stare at him for a few moments, not sure how to react. 

“What else do you want to see me in? This, perhaps?” he struts over to the lingerie section, picking up a pair of silk panties, showing them to you. You nod your head, earning a sly grin and a wink from Matty as he puts them into his little basket.

“Or are you more of a lace kinda gal?” There's a hint of tease in his voice as he holds up another pair. The green pair. 

Your breath hitches as he stares at you, looking for a reaction, smiling victoriously when he sees it. Raising his eyebrows, he wordlessly adds them to the growing pile of merchandise he’s accumulated in the short span he’d been wandering around the store. 

“Fucking hell.” you mutter under your breath as he grabs your hand, dragging you over to the garters. It all seems unreal, the way he confidently shows off the pieces over his clothes, ‘modeling’ for you in front of other shoppers, utterly shameless. 

“I'll wear it for you, you just have to tell me what you want.” he parrots your words back at you. ‘Just tell me what you want, Matthew’

If only he knew. 

“You look pretty in everything Matty, I'd rather you pick.”

“And I'd rather you be turned on, hm? C’mon, tell me, I don't bite.” you giggle a bit at his choice of words, the marks on your neck contradicting his statement. 

“You like it when I'm pretty for you?” he whispers into your ear, the words going straight to your core. Your knees feel weak, ready to buckle at any moment if he keeps talking like that.

Nodding frantically, you press a small kiss to his lips, taking his hand. You lead him to the shoes, heels and boots of all heights and colors stacked neatly in piles against a wall.

“Oh, I'm liking this turn of events.” he grins, hands reaching out to touch a specific pair of black platforms, adorned with small gemstones along the strap. You had a similar pair, knowing just how hard they were here to walk in. 

“You do?” you question, feeling his free hand wrap around your waist, bringing the shoes up for you to touch, the leather rough under your fingertips.

“You turn me on so much, it fucking hurts. I love being your little fantasy, all dolled up for you.” he speaks slowly, quiet enough so that only you can hear. You cough, almost choking on air as he adds the shoes to the basket, walking off as though nothing happened. 

“This one?” he asks, holding up another toy. A pale pink strap-on, less glittery than the last one, but still incredibly eye-catching. You eye him up and down, the way he stood like he was holding the most normal thing ever appalling you. 

“You sure?” he nods enthusiastically, eyes silently begging you to say yes. “Imagine how pretty i’d look, imagine the pictures-” 

Oh, he loved to tease you about those, your collection of filthy polaroids growing larger and larger the longer you were together, stashed at the bottom of your nightstand. 

“Sure you can take it?'' The expression on his face is priceless as you fight fire with fire, his grin vanishing, being replaced with an embarrassed blush dusting his face. 

He wordlessly adds it, walking off in the direction of the till. You follow closely, watching him take a bottle of lube (strawberry flavored, because it's Matty) from the shelf, placing it in the basket.

It was all so new, uncharted territory for both of you. Sure, he teased and you teased back, throwing witty retorts at each other until one eventually gave up, but you were both equally nervous and excited, the idea absolutely thrilling. 

The bus ride back home is slightly awkward, the bags in your hands adorning the very obvious logo of the sex shop you’d just been in, earning judging glances from strangers. Matty remains unbothered, engrossed in an old edition of vogue he’d bought at check out. You watch him leaf through the pages, inspecting outfits and designs, muttering when he doesn't agree with them. It was endearing, watching him critique world famous fashion designers, like his opinion would hold and weight in a proper argument. 

200 quid was what the trip had cost you, spending way more than you had planned. Matty had paid for it with his parents' money that they sent to him every so often, wanting him to be able to live comfortably even if they were away. You felt sort of bad, offering to use your own cash, quickly being swatted away by an insistent Matty.

“I have to pay, seeing as I am a gentleman. Besides, you're going to be taking great care of me later, so-” you manage to cut him off with a stealth elbow in the ribs, sparing the poor cashier from one of his terribly inappropriate rants. 

—---------------------------------------------------------------

Home is comfortable, much unlike the harsh summer weather and the beating sun that waited for you outside. Unlocking the door, you've met with the soft hum of the air conditioner, the cool air kissing your skin. Matty lets out a relieved sigh as he finally sets down the bags, stretching his arms over his head. You catch a glimpse of his lower stomach, a small trail of hair traveling from his belly button and into the waistband of his pants, which were hung obscenely low on his hips. 

“Do you want to-” you're cut off by Matty’s lips on yours, one hand gripping onto the base of your neck, the other pulling you in by the waist. Despite being almost three inches taller, you manage to overpower him quickly, pressing him into the wall behind him. He gasps against your lips, his fingers digging into your hips as you grasp him by the hair, tugging him down to meet you. 

“Desperate, much?” you say condescending, one of your fingers trailing down the hollow of his throat, grazing the skin enough to leave a faint red mark. 

He loved seeing the aftermath of you on his body, and you’ve caught him admiring himself in the mirror more than once, running his fingertips over the bruises and scratches, reliving the moments that caused them. It's not like he left you bare, either, the complete opposite, actually. Your neck was full of hickeys in various colors, some more faded than others. 

He loved using his teeth, and had once left an incredibly obvious bite mark on the skin just above your collarbone, getting disgusted and borderline traumatized looks from both Ross and George. Adam never did mention i, but you caught him stealing glances at both of you, his tell tale ‘what the actual fuck did you do’ look on his face. 

“You’re one to talk, don’t think I didnt see how you looked at me back there.” he smirks against your lips, tongue swiping along your bottom lip, pulling it between his teeth. You use your body weight to hold him up against the wall, pressing a knee right between his legs, a move he loved to use on you, and watching you grind against him is his favorite sight in the whole world.

His hips buck against your lower half, his hard-on brushing up against your thigh. He groans at the slight friction, repeating the action until you stop him.  

“Please, fuck- please.” he breathes, eyeing the bag on the ground behind you with a look of pure lust on his face.

Your knees feel weak, your stomach flipping as he reaches out to touch your face, trailing his fingers down your jaw and onto your neck, lovingly pressing kisses all over your skin, almost as if to try and convince you of something.

Wordlessly, you grab him by the collar of his shirt, leading him down the long hallway and up the stairs, almost tripping. You near the bedroom, unable to take your hands off each other as he pathetically whimpers into your mouth, nails clawing at your back.

The door swings open and you push him forward until the back of his knees hit the bed, making him fall onto it. 

“Been thinking ‘bout this for a while, haven't you?” he nods slowly, chest heaving from the sheer force of your kiss, leaving him breathless.  

“You can’t imagine.” he answers, eyes looking up at you from his spot on the bed, wide and full of want. 

“So pretty.” you whisper to yourself, reaching down to push his shirt up, revealing that little bit of hair on his stomach, so incredibly sexy it made your head spin. 

“Take your shirt off for me, I'll be back.” you kiss him again, softly this time, not even looking at his reaction before turning around and disappearing through the door. Your legs carry you as fast as they can go, taking two steps at a time as you race downstairs, eyes settling on the hot pink paper bag left abandoned on the floor. 

Rifling through the pile of various clothes, underwear, gags, toys; really anything you could think of, your breath hitches as your fingers brush against cold resin. Of course it was made of resin, ridiculously expensive as well, typical Matty. You laugh to yourself, taking a close look at the toy in your hands.

It was pale pink, hyper realistic veins running down the sides of it, the actual strappy part a deep purple, almost black. Your heart thrums against your ribcage, almost forgetting one vital thing: the lube. 

The sight before you open the door again is one that should be chiseled into stone and hung up for thousands of years. Matty is on the bed, further up so that his head is resting on the metal bed frame up against the wall, it being more comfortable that way. His shirt is off, just like you had told him. 

One thing made you freeze. His hand was covering his lower half, palming his obvious hard on through his insanely tight jeans. It looked painful, well hidden by the filthy smirk that tugged at the corners of his lips, making your heart skip a beat. 

“Kept me waiting.'' His voice is low, raspy, and desperate, even if he tries to play it off. You move without thinking, watching his eyes flicker over to the toy in your hand, which you place onto the bed out of his reach. 

“Not my fault you can't go five seconds without touching yourself.” you shoot back, kneeling onto the soft mattress. 

“Sort of is, isn't it?” he sounds playful, almost giddy as you catch his lips in a kiss. 

“You were begging so nicely before, what happened?” you fake pout at him, putting on a slightly condescending tone as he rolls his eyes at you. 

“I caught my breath.” he says, hands settling on your hips as you straddle him properly, his aching cock grinding against the curve of your ass. It feels amazing, your ego swelling as you take him in, needy and wanting for you and you only. 

“Yeah?” 

“Might have to take it again.” 

You get what he’s playing at immediately, reaching up to wrap your hand around his throat. Matty lets out a choked gasp, eyes widening at the sensation. 

“Fuck-” he’s cut off by you pressing down harder, watching all the blood in his head rush down south. 

“What? Couldn't quite hear you, speak up.” you taunt, loving watching him struggle to answer you, all that came out being rasp gasps and curses.

“Please-” his breath hitches when you reach down to skillfully unbutton his pants with one hand, silently thanking the gods above he had decided to forgo a belt today, peeling the jeans off of him. He lets out a choked moan as you grip him through his boxers, wishing he had worn a pair of women’s panties, knowing it would rile you up even more.  

 “What? Use your words, Matthew, tell me what you want.” you tease, ignoring his silent begging, only slightly letting go of his throat, scared he wasn't properly getting oxygen. 

“Touch me, please.” he manages to force out, tears of relief welling up in his eyes when you take him out of his boxers, stroking his cock lightly. 

“This all for me? All because of that toy? Filthy, filthy boy.” his mind blanks, ecstacy overtaking his body and mind, the only thing he could think of was how fucking lucky he was. The strap is only visible in the corner of your eye as you kiss him hard, slipping your tongue into his mouth, drinking in every little gasp. 

You dig your thumb into his slit, his hips arching off the bed and into your hand, spurts of precum leaking out of his tip. You smile at his reaction, one question still running through your mind. This was all so new, and you were riffing off of what you already knew he liked, trying to build up as much tension as possible. 

“Have you done this before?” he takes a second to answer, slowly nodding his head. You motion for him to elaborate. A pang of insecurity rushes through you at the thought of him doing this with someone else, another person seeing him like this. You push it all down, turning your full attention to Matty. 

“Only alone, trying some things out..” his voice is uncharacteristically small, eyes avoiding you as he stutters over the second part of his sentence, clearly a bit embarrassed. 

“Oh yeah? Did it feel good?” you encourage him, desperate to make him feel as comfortable as possible. He smirks, and you can basically see the memories flash behind his eyes. 

Alone, late at night. Curiosity striking, clothes hitting the floor of his old bedroom. A mess of lube and spit, fingers experimentally curling upwards and finally, finally hitting that perfect spot deep inside of him, making him moan into his pillow, trying to muffle the sound. 

But of course, Matty has to do and say something so utterly stupid, it makes your eyes hurt from rolling them. 

“It’ll feel so much better if you do it for me, darling. Treat me right and all, seeing as I am your girl-” you playfully hit his arm, effectively shutting him up. He wasn't fully wrong, but the way he worded it was purposefully supposed to make you cringe, your eyes screwing shut and hands going to cover your face in embarrassment. 

“Shut up, what is your damage?” you ask, glaring at him as he tries his best to stifle his giggles. It's infectious, and soon you start laughing as well, falling into his arms, losing it at the ridiculousness of the situation.

“Can you take nothing seriously?” It's a rhetorical question, but he still answers.

 “Nothing.” he drags out the word, mocking you.

You take this opportunity to tug at his cock, wiping the smug grin directly from his face. It was satisfying, watching him go from cocky and borderline bratty, to a sweet, moldable putty in the palm of your hand, willing to do whatever you asked of him.

 “A-ah oh fuck, i’m not gonna- stop.” he gasps, trying to push you off. You fight back, pinning him down using your entire body, your fingertips ghosting over his cock. 

“Gotta get you ready to take me, don't want it to hurt, do you?” your voice drips with lust, relishing in the wanton sounds he lets out at your words. Matty looks at you, mouth slightly ajar as if trying to say something. You nod at him. 

“I can- I can show you. If you want. We both know how much you like to watch me.” he gestures to the camera sitting on the nightstand, grinning from ear to ear. 

“Go on.” you whisper, your voice cracking. 

He flips around, and you use this little bit of time to slip your own clothes off, leaving your shirt and panties on, settling onto the bed behind him.

His hands reach for the bottle of lube, blindly feeling around for it. You hand it to him with a sickly sweet smile, making his stomach flip as he spreads his legs, a performative moan leaving his lips as he uncaps it with his teeth, pouring the liquid onto his fingers.   

It's weird, seeing him in this position, facedown against the mattress, tugging his boxers down with his clean hand. He can feel your eyes on him, raking over his milky skin, watching him take a deep breath as the cool lube hits his skin. 

“You look pretty.” you hear him snigger into the pillow at the breathlessness of your voice.  “Right? Good genes, innit?” he says smugly, craning his head around to get a look at your annoyed expression.

“Oh fuck off.” you smack him on the arse, taking the piss out of his stupid comments. 

He gasps, and now it's your turn to be smug, grazing your nails over the skin you’d just hit 

“Seriously? That turned you on?” he nods, tracing his lube covered fingers over his hole, shivering a bit before pushing one in. 

A string of moans and curses spill from lips, panting as his back arches at the intrusion. You watch him with wide eyes, taking every minuscule twitch of his body as he curls them slightly, going even deeper. You commit everything to memory, wanting this moment to last forever, and you reach out to trail your hands down his sides, digging your slightly grown out nails into his hips, making him moan into the pillows.  

“Giving me a proper show then. Anything to get my attention, right?” you mumble, leaning over him as he fingers himself for you, groaning and twitching against the mattress, overcome with pleasure.

“It’s working isn't it?” he forces out, the feeling of your chest pressed to his back making his eyes roll back in his head, his tip leaking spurts of precum onto the sheets  

“Fuck, yeah, its working.” 

His fingers brush up against a certain spot inside of him and he quite literally shakes, arching and pushing down onto his digits, his body begging for more. You watch, entranced in every movement he makes, in a sort of daze. 

You could sense him gaining back a sense of confidence when he peers back at you, seeing your blissed out expression at the sight of him fucking himself open for you, moans and whimpers going straight to the growing heat in your core.

“Wanna fuck me? Make me moan for you?” he teases, moving his lube covered hand to his cock, tugging at himself as you pull him closer. The strap next to you burns a hole into your brain, and you reach for it, hand gliding over the resin. 

“Wanna take a pretty picture with that little camera of yours?” That was the final straw that made you scramble up, fumbling with the fastens of the toy, unbuckling them and slipping it over your underwear, the weight of it a bit strange. 

 “I’m going to make you eat those words.” you threaten, one of your hands threading through his hair, pulling his face up before dropping it back onto the pillows. He whimpers at the sharp pain radiating from his scalp, spreading all the way to his fingertips that clutch the sheets so tightly, his knuckles look pale white. 

“It's what I'm counting on, darling.” he winks, arching his back towards you, grinding his arse against your strap. This was really happening. Sucking in a deep breath, you steady yourself on your knees, taking the toy into your hand, circling his hole with it. A sigh of pleasure leaves his parted lips as he relaxes into the bed, arse up and face buried into the dark blue fabric of his pillow. 

The sound of the lube covering the strap is a bit awkward, and you both laugh lightheartedly, nervous and excited to do this with each other, to each other. He groans as you finally line up with his entrance, the tip teasing him as he bucks back onto it.  

“Want me to go slow?” you ask, slightly nervous, scared of doing something wrong or god forbid, hurting him in any way. 

“Fuck me slow, yeah?” His words drip with lust, raspy and deliberately drawn out. He notices your hesitation, and his hand reaches back to grab yours, rubbing reassuring circles into the skin of your palm.  

“Jesus, you make it sound so filthy.” His vulgar words were nothing new, his cocky manner only another tool to get you to lose it on him, never showing mercy. Just like he liked it. Rough, hard, fast, never ending pleasure until both of you were fully satisfied. 

“Stop being a tease and just fuck me.” he was now at the point of making demands, blatantly ignoring the imbalance of power between you. You tut at him, nails digging into the fat of his arse, making him wince in pain.

“Not in a place to be demanding things from me, are you now?” your tone is deliciously condescending, making his cock involuntarily twitch under him, begging for attention. 

“You want it just as much as me.” he breathes loudly, a feeble attempt at trying not to sound as desperate as he really was, not wanting to admit defeat. 

“Make me mess, fuck me dumb, I know you want to.” an animalistic groan rips itself from your throat as you push into him, feeling the smallest bit of resistance at first. 

Remembering his little reaction from earlier, you experimentally smack the side of his arse, right where its curve meets the top of his thigh, and he shudders beneath you, crying out in pleasure. You don't know what you're doing, but you do gain a flicker of confidence when he grinds down against the bed, mumbling into the pillow. Asking him to speak up, his face is now visible as he moans, hips pushing back onto the toy as you pull back out, leaving him feeling empty.

You snap your hips forward, a bit harsher this time, watching and listening for his reaction, wanting to make it feel as good as possible for him. He was trusting you with the most intimate part of him, giving up almost all control as his arms go slack under him, nothing holding his body up anymore. 

“Fuckk, that's so good.” he breathes as you set a delicate but even rhythm, speeding up a bit with every thrust as he slowly gets used to the sensation. It takes a few minutes of fucking him at an agonizing pace until you feel his whole body tense up, a choked moan spilling from his parted, spit covered lips. Your breath hitches at the sight of him drooling, eyes screwed shut in pure bliss. 

“OH FUCKK- right there right there right there jesus christ, fuck-” he curses, clawing around him, trying to find something to bring him back down to reality as your strap brushes up against his G-spot. There's a wet spot on the bed under him, precum covering the blue fabric of the sheets. 

“Sound so pretty, all for me.” you hit that same spot over and over as he pathetically cries out your name, begging for you to go faster. 

“Please, its so good, so good, fuck me please oh FUCK.” you oblige, gripping onto his hips as you slam back into him, his back arching sharply as you pant, you cheeks a bright red. Your whole body is flushes crimson, your cunt clenching around nothing as you get off to the sounds and movements he makes, your witty words getting caught in the back of your throat

You're so incredibly turned on that everything else disappears around you, your only focus being a desperate Matty under you, writhing in pleasure as he experiences actual heaven, his whole body covered in a thin layer of sweat, making him glow in the dim light of the bedroom.

Sinful sounds fills the bedroom, reverberating off the walls making you feel dizzy, partially from the effort and partially from the boy in your bed, whimpering your name betweens strings of curses, begging you to just fuck him harder. 

Matty, though he hates it, is awfully predictable. He has cues that let you know when he’s close, his voice pitching up several octaves as you slam into him, never faltering. 

You take the opportunity to press your chest against the curve of his back, hard nipples rubbing against his skin through your thin shirt. Your voice is low, whispering lewd promises against his ear, occasionally nibbling at the skin, sucking a hickey into it. 

“Gonna cum for me? I can see you leaking all over the sheets, dirty boy” he cries at yours, tears of overwhelming pleasure streaming down his face, leaving small wet patches on the pillow. 

“Yesyesyes please don’t stop- so close.” he begs, every part of his body twitching and tensing, so close to the edge he could taste it. 

You don't know what possesses you. Maybe it was his comment from earlier, his tone playful and teasing, eyes dark with desire. 

“Wanna take a pretty picture with that little camera of yours?”

It's like a foreign force taking over your body. You still, ignoring Matty’s pleas for you to keep going, his hips bucking wildly onto the toy still deep inside of him.

“No- nonono please, i was so close, fuck.” you click your tongue at him, effectively shutting him up

He winces when you move, hand reaching for something on the nightstand, not even realizing what you were doing. The plastic is heavy in your hands, black lense staring back at you as you reposition yourself behind Matty, the tip of your strap teasing his hole.

He thinks you’ll continue as normal, that you'll give him what he’s been craving this entire time. All he wants to do is cum, mind so clouded with desire that he could barely speak properly

Your hands threads into his hair, his neck limp as you pull him up by it. Your fingers find the shutter, knowing you had to act fast to get the result you so desperately wanted.

Pulling his head further back so his whole face was visible, you position the camera in front of it, the sight of the lense making Matty’s heart skip a beat. 

Right as you take the picture, you violently snap your hips forwards, thrusting into him at a brutal pace, making his face contort in ecstasy, mouth falling open, revealing his pink tongue between his lips.

The camera flash is disorienting for him, the shutter barely heard over his impossibly loud moans, his sounds making you feel weightless.

He lets out a high laugh as he fully gets what you’d just done, only proving his earlier point further. His little victory is interrupted by his impending orgasm, the combination of the pressure from your strap on his G-spot and the delicious friction of the sheets rubbing against his cock sending him into a lust driven frenzy. 

His moans are high pitched, almost feminine as he buries his face into his slack arms, trying to bite back his noises. You tell him to quit it, demanding to hear every single cry that leaves his lips.

“You’re such a brat, acting like I cant have you fucking purring under me in the blink of an eye.” you speak, an intense feeling of power and control taking your body as you slam into him, licking up the skin of his bare neck, making him shudder under your touch. 

“I promise i’ll be good- just please let me cum.” he’s a blubbering mess, tears rolling down his cheeks as you tug harshly on his hair, the pain only making it harder for him to hold off his orgasm.

“Please- I need it so bad- fuck, please.” 

“Oh, you need it, do you?” you taunt him, your fingers moving to shove their way into his mouth, pressing down on his wet, hot tongue. The whimper he lets out as you gag him makes your brain short circuit, your eyes are fixed on the way he grinds his hips to meet your frantic thrusts, desperate to get himself off.

“Go on then, cum all over our nice sheets. Make everything dirty, just like you are, aren't you darling?” the filthy words spill from your lips before you could even think, and Matty stills for a second before moaning around your fingers, bucking against the mattress. 

“So good, so fucking good- oh my god, fuck, feels so good-” his words are muffled by your fingers, and as much as you need to hear him, you let it slide, wanting your perfect boy to finally come undone. He cums with a scream, an actual, guttural scream of your name, convulsing under your touch as you reach around and grip his cock, working him through his orgasm. 

He gasps as ropes of cum paint the sheets, covering your hand. You slow down your thrusts, not wanting to rip him out of his dazed state just yet. He whimpers as you pull out, feeling strangely empty without you filling up every inch of him. His body is limp against the bed, chest heaving trying to take in as much oxygen as possible as he comes down from his high, slowly but surely. 

You yelp when a hand grips the side of your arm suddenly, pulling you down onto the bed next to him. Matty’s sweet smile makes your heart swell up with love as you make eye contact, his brown eyes drooped half shut in pleasure. 

“Fucking mint.” he breathes, giggling as you roll your eyes at his utterly unsexy reaction to you fucking his brains out. 

“Really?” 

His smile turns into a grin as he pulls you in for a kiss, lips pressing firmly against yours. You hand cups his cheeks, wiping aways what's left of his tears.

“I fucking love you, that was world altering, fuck me.”   

“I already did, remember?” the opportunity was right there, and you both erupt into a fit of laughter at your bad jokes, grinning widely at each other. Matty lets out a grossed-out groan when he accidently rolls into the wet patch he had left in the bed, crying at the feeling of the damp fabric against his bare legs.

But, in typical Matty fashion, he opts to just cope, too lazy and fucked out to do anything about it. You try to convince him to get up, shower, maybe do anything except roll around in his cum soaked sheets. He flat out refuses, gripping your waist so tightly you felt Matty-shaped bruises form on the skin. 

He forces you to lay with him, not letting you get up. 

“Did it hurt?” you ask tentatively, genuinely curious. He shakes his head, trying to describe the sensation. 

“A bit, but it felt really fucking great after about two seconds, so totally worth it.” he kisses you again, softer but still passionate, sucking your bottom lip between his teeth, biting down lightly. 

“Did you like it?” he asks, trailing a finger up and down your arm, scratching it comfortingly. 

All you can do is smile, the memory of what you felt making you giddy. 

“I felt powerful.” you confess, a faint blush spreading onto your already flushed cheeks. Might as well let it all out, right? 

“You like being powerful?” you nod your head, confirming the sneaking suspicion he’s had since that very first night on his living room sofa. 

“I like it when you hurt me.” you laugh, that information having been painfully obvious for a while now. 

“I know, darling, you make it so obvious.” he curses at you for quote un-quote ‘kink shaming’ him, immediately mentioning your little knack for photography. 

“What do you do with the pictures?” you’ve never told him what happens to the polaroids after they properly develop, stashed in your nightstand drawer. 

“I don't kiss and tell.” you snigger at his hurt reaction, now even more desperate to know what goes on in your mind when your finger presses down on the shutter, immortalizing Matty in a picture as small as the palm of your hand. 

“That does not work if I'm the one you kissed, I’m afraid.” you dismiss him with a shake of your head, watching the hope leave his face. He nags you further, offering all sorts of services to get you to confess to him.

“I’ll show you sometime.” his eyes light up, ready to make yet another filthy comment. You press a finger to his lips, shushing him like he was a misbehaved child, smirking at his reaction. 

“Only if you're good, though.” he nods his head so eagerly, you're afraid he might get whiplash as he shuffles closer to you, nuzzling his face into your shirt (well, his goal was clearly your tits, but you didn't need to know that.)

“I'll be so good for you, you’ll regret ever denying me.” you laugh, vowing to hold him to it.  

Chapter 26

Word count 2208

I think the only mentions for this one is maybe mentions of depression or inclination of it

THIS ONE IS WRITTEN FROM ROSS’ POV, AND I DONT KNOW HOW ITS GOING TO BE SO IF ITS BAD IM SORRY , I DONT RELALY KNOW ROSS BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOY IT

Feedback is always welcome 🥰

Also thank you so much to all of you who are taking time out of your day to read this (I know there’s so many better fanfics out there , better written and all but ) I’m so thankful for those who are reading it

I also do blurbs as well if anyone has any ideas they might want to get to me

I feel like this might be a little trickier for me to write as I've never written anything from Ross'POV before so if this is terrible I'm so sorry .

Ross' POV

"What are we gunna do with you huh ?"

I felt Matty slightly shrug at my question as I slowly wrack my hands through his hair being careful but he still shock his head a little "please don't....it hurts" , he was shivering

"Are you cold?" , I felt him shake his head again at my question. "Do you need water?", again another shake if his head. This is going to be a long night. "What do you need mate?"

"George ...George doesn't...He was gunna call me tonight.can you...can you tell him that I might not be"

"Tell him on what" , I pull my phone out of my pocket being careful enough to try and not disturb Matty who was still resting on my lap

"Add his insta , bedforddanes75, just send him a message", so that I do , I add George but instead of waiting for the add back I send him a message straight away

Ross : Hey if this is the correct George , I'm Ross , Mattys best mate, I know you and Matty were supposed to call tonight but Matty isn't having the best of nights so he's with me , if you need anything please just gimme a shout and I'll see what I can do 😌

I then place my phone on the table beside me and turn my attention straight back to Matty "When was the last time you had a proper meal Matty ?", I'm scared to actually find out the answer at this point , I never realised how thin hed gotten until I was picking him up. He's so light

"Proper meal um .....I don't really know...I snack on stuff occasionally but ..I uh... I don't remember the last full meal I had"

"Right , I'm going to get you some food and water okay, can you stay ere for me?", I felt him shrug again against my leg. "What you trying to say mate?"

"Nothing, just not hungry but alright", I slowly removed him from my legs and tried to tuck him into the bed properly and made sure he was comfy enough. I snag my phone from the table beside him and give him a small peck on his temple "I love you mate"

"You too Rosso" ,

"Just shout if you need me okay"

"Mhm"

I make my way from the my room and quickly through to my mums just checking that there alright "you alright mum".

"I'm alright love, how's Matty doing?" , I slip into the room and close the door leaning against it. "I honestly have no idea at this point Mum"

"What's up with him like love?"

I scratch the back of my head really debating telling my mum about everything because I know she'll tell Denise but I've gotten to the point where I can't keep it together anymore and someone needs to tell Denise and Matty will never do it, so I slide down the door sat down next to it, something I've done since I was young always just sat at the door while I need to tell her something "He's on stuff Mum , like really deep in them and, I don't know if he knows how to stop, he was just messing around to begin with but it's gotten really bad, and it's not my place to tell Denise or Tim but someone needs to and I know he never will and I don't know how to help him anymore Mum but he really needs help."

"What stuff do you mean love, what's he taken"

"I don't know to the full extent because, I don't know how honest he is sometimes when it comes to it but, uh I think he's on coke and drinks a lot too, and weed , I mean I know I smoke weed but like all of it all the time it's just getting to much for him", I know I should trust him in what he tells me but he's just been so off lately and it's so difficult and everyone including himself is suffering and I just need to help him.

"And what do you mean by it just started off as messing around?, you haven't taken anything have you?"

"No I haven't myself , but I do know that uh Janey and Matty used to do stuff when they were just at parties and stuff but I never realised how bad it got for him, he never did it around anyone other than Janey or Corey I think"

"Do I know Corey?", my mum was sat up now on her phone probably about to contact Denise, because that's what mums do isn't it.

"No, I don't really know Corey myself he's a bit older than us but Matty met him at a party"

"Right , thank you my love, is there anything else that Denise would need to know?, anything else really?"

"I think she probably knows but he's really struggling at school , just having panic attacks all the time over the smallest things , but I think she knows that" , I rise up from my spot on the floor and quickly say goodbye to her as I feel like that might be the end of the conversation. Then make my way to the kitchen to make some food for him. Just some eggs on toast , protein might help. As well as a glass of water I make some tea for us both as well it'll calm him down. It takes about ten minutes to get everything ready. I load everything onto a tray and make my way back up to him, when I reach my room the first thing I notice is that Matty is somewhat quiet even in this state.

"Matty" , I push the door open and what I'm faced with is Matty fast asleep in my bed curled up into the blanket still fully clothed. I play the tray on the table next to my bed and just take myself over to the bed and sit next to him. I take out my phone again and see that I have a pending request and message from George.

George : oh hey Ross, thanks for telling me, what happened?

Ross: I don't really know what happened I didn't get the whole story, everything just kind of took a turn for the worst tonight.

George : what do you mean?? Is he okay? , is he awake can I see him?????

Ross: he's alright for now, he's asleep right now and I don't really want to wake him, I don't think he's stable right now

George: when he wakes up can you tell him I'm asking for him yeh ??

Ross: sure thing bro honestly , can I let you in on a little secret ??

George : sure

Ross: I think your gunna be really good for him , he ain't shut up about ya really and uh I think he really likes ya, but please don't hurt him

George : I'd never plan on hurting him, he’s really managed to crawl his way into my brain, I just hope he’s okay

Ross : I’ll keep an eye on him and keep you updated G

I place my phone back into my bedside table and carefully lay down properly and turn my tv on, putting on Simpson a just for background noise while I hold Matty through his tough time and just cradle his body on my arms occasionally telling him everything will be okay

After about another half an hour I can feel him storing in my arms so I release my grip a tiny bit “hey there you muppet”, He doesn’t move much but wraps his arms around me squeezing a little “are you okay?”

“My ead hurts Ross, like real bad”, he buries his head in the crook of my neck trying to hide from the light a little bit.

“Matty?”

“Mhm”

“What happened?, like really ?, can you be honest?” , as he’s leaning against me I can feel a tiny tremor coursing through his body

“I don’t think I can”

“Can’t what ?, tell me?”

“I don’t know what happened Ross I swear, I was fine then I wasn’t, that’s all there is too it”

“Can you at least tell me why you needed to do any of that stuff Matty?, like why did you feel the need to go out and get high again?”

“Everything is just so loud in my head, it’s like grey and cloudy , I see everything in greyscale basically, and I wanted to stop it like even for just a second, like you know when you wake up and like you can hear the birds chirping away and someone is cutting the grass down the road and there’s like sounds from people being busy round the house and it can be quite irritating when your trying to sleep well it’s like that in my head all the time, I can just hear everything, every annoying noise , everything buzzes or ticks , the static in the tv, the electricity running through everything and it’s annoys me so much makes it hard to concentrate and I just wanted to shut it up” , I can feel my shoulder start to get a little wet, indicating that Matty is crying again so I bring my arms around him properly again and hold him. “I just feel lost man….like everything is pushing me closer and closer to the edge everyday….some days I can cope with it ….but other days It just won’t go away”.

“But is nearly killing yourself the answer Matty!?”, I can’t imagine a world where Matty wasn’t in it, We’ve already lost one members of our little clique I don’t know if I’d cope with Matty gone too.

“I’m not gunna die Ross, I’ll be fine, I just don’t know how to deal with it sometimes, this is the only way I know” , Matty let’s go off me now, sits up and wipes his eyes harshly with the sleeve of his jacket. “I just want to feel like I’m not losing my mind”.

“Why can’t you tell people when things get to hard for you” , I adjust myself so I’m sat cross legged on the bed next to him looking at him, searching for any sign , literally anything that might tell me how he’s feeling.

“I try Rosso , but I just…I don’t know, I just feel like if I tell people they’ll try to stop me from doing what I need to do to feel better….and it’ll just make it worse” , Matty mirrors me my actions sat cross legged also but flings his jacket off and placed it in the space between us. “I’m so angry or upset all the time and I hate it , I just wanna be me again”

“You are you, you’ll always be Matty no matter how your feeling , your allowed to be angry , upset , stressed, but you don’t have to destroy yourself Mate, I know your finding stuff hard and I hate having to watch you go through it but I need you to know that your my best mate like ever and I can’t lose you” , we’re both crying now, I rarley cry but when it comes to serious stuff it makes me emotional and I know I’m going to lose it if this keeps happening. “You got some tea and food there can you try have some for me”

“Mhm”, I know he’s not going to have much of it and it’s gone cold but I need to see him eat even if it’s just for my own selfish reasons for my own peice of mind you know, he picks up the tray and starts picking away at the bread. “Ross ?”

“Yeh man”

“Did you tell George?, like what happened”

“No , I didn’t tell him what happened , you should do that , I just told him your having a bad night, and he was asking for you though , he seems like a good egg”

“He so is, would you mind if we called, he might cheer me up a little” , as he’s sipping on his tea I can tell that he’s still a little bit bouncy and I don’t know how to describe it maybe like scared , anxious is the word. “I mean not that your not doing a good job but like, I’d like for you to meet him too”

“Sure you can, but I need you to do one thing for me” , I want him to tell his mum what’s going on like fully , so we can all work on it together , help him through this bump in the road, get him the help he might need and we can get out Matty back.

“Yeh”

“Can you please tell your mum that your um ….I don’t know the word like … struggling with drugs”, he notice him out of the corner of my eye put his toast down as I say it. “Like I know it’ll be hard but she’s been where you are ….she might be a little better help than me and she’ll have better advice than me”

“Okay, but later okay”

Dudes I’m aware it was my birthday on the 20th and you wanted to give me a prezzie BUT I was not in attendance so playing YOU AND ALSO PLAYING ME WHILE IM NOT THERE IS WILD !!!!!

I have to just pass away

// 20.10.23 // Charlotte // You

© @a_girl_called_mel

"babe, you can barely keep your eyes open...let's go." with matty 🧎🏼‍♀️ thank u my liege ily 💞🩷💓

I’m connecting those because they’re kind of similar, I hope you like it. Thank you for your kindness btw x

sleepy dialogue prompt 🧸

^ "you're blurring your words together, time for bed." & "babe, you can barely keep your eyes open...let's go." (matty)

You know matty said you don’t have to wait up. But you’ve barely seen each other the past weeks because he’s been busy with working on his new album and honestly work hasn’t been giving you a break either.

That’s why you’re sitting on his couch, watching criminal minds with a soothing night lamp at the end of the couch.

You’re fighting sleep at this point and when you look at your phone and see that it’s almost 2 you know he’s going to be home in just a few minutes. You rub your eyes and watch the people trying to investigate a crime in the TV but all you can think about is matty. His hair, his smile, his skin, the way he loves to kiss every inch of your skin.

You feel your heart flutter at just the thought of his Matty’s going to act when he finally comes home.

You sink deeper into the fabric, the warmth of the blanket trying to lull you into sleep. And you almost do but then you hear the clinking of the door.

Matty exhales all his worry and stress when he comes through the door, shrugging off his jacket and shoes. He’s sure that you’re asleep but when he hears voices from the living room he steps inside, running his hand through his hair.

When he sees you on the couch, Redbull on the table in front of you his heart melts a bit.

You turn your head and smile at him, “you’re home.”

“I am,” he says, settling onto the couch next to you.

He leans over you and spends some time kissing you.

His lips are warm and soft, a perfect contrast to the cool night air that clings to him. He cups your face gently, his thumb stroking your cheek as he deepens the kiss. You melt into him, the exhaustion of the day slipping away with each tender touch.

"You should've gone to bed, love," he murmurs against your lips, but there's no reprimand in his voice, only affection.

"I wanted to wait for you," you reply, your voice sleepy but full of love.

“You’re cute,” he brushes his nose against yours, “scoot over, what are you watching?”

“Criminal minds, of course.” you sound sassy which makes him giggle, behind you.

“F’course.”

His arm wraps around your waist, pulling you closer until there’s no space left between you. You feel his lips brush softly against the spot behind your ear, sending shivers down your spine. He moves your hair to the side, his kisses trailing from behind your ear to the nape of your neck, each one slow and tender.

His hands are warm, one resting gently on your waist, the other slipping under your shirt to caress your skin. "I missed you," he murmurs, his lips barely leaving your skin as he speaks. His voice is low, filled with affection, and it makes your heart flutter.

You close your eyes, fully focusing on his touch.

“Missed you too,” you whisper back.

Matty's lips curve into a smile against your neck. "You’re so beautiful," he says softly, his hand tracing gentle patterns on your stomach. “Most gorgeous girl on the planet.”

You turn your head slightly to look at him, your eyes meeting his. “You’re too sweet, Matty.”

“Nonsense,” he tries to convince you by kissing you softly, his lips lingering against yours.

When he pulls back you don’t move. You try to gaze into his brown perfect eyes but you fight fight to keep your eyes open.

Matty smiles, brushing a few strands of hair away from your face.

“Are you tired, love?”

You don’t respond immediately, too caught up in the warmth of his body and the softness of his touch. He nudges you gently, his voice a soft murmur, “Hm, baby?”

You shake your head, not wanting to admit how tired you are. “Not tired, tell me about your day, about your week.”

Matty chuckles, “you sure? babe, you can barely keep you eyes open, let’s go to bed.”

“No.” You turn around, switching from the spooning position to facing him. You wrap your arm around him to keep him close. “C’mon Matty, talk to me.”

“god,” he laughs, “alright.”

His touch is soothing, his fingers lightly massaging your scalp. You relax completely, feeling the tension drain from your body.

“It was busy, we had a lot of work, some new projects that came in. It was a bit chaotic but we all managed.”

His hand moves to your back, drawing slow circles that make you sigh contentedly.

“Tell me more,” you say, your eyes fluttering close. You don’t want matty to notice so you hide your face in the crook of his neck. He’s not stupid though and he knows you.

First of all he grabs the remote control to shut the TV off, the less distractions the more you might admit that you’re tired.

Matty kisses the top of your head, “thought about you the whole day and all I wanted to do was come home to you.”

“N’ I’m glad you’re here, after this shit week n’ all.”

It’s clear that you shouldn’t be awake. Matty sits up which leads to you groaning and trying to cling to him. He sits up and pulls the blanket away from you, folding it and throwing it over the back of the couch.

“Alright now, you’re blurring your words together, time for bed.”

He lifts you effortlessly into his arms.

“Matty, want to stay here with you, want to-.”

He shakes his head and shushes you gently. “Nah, no arguing, you’re exhausted, love.” His lips brush your forehead.

You try to object again, but he’s already carrying you towards the bedroom. “You just came home though, we have no time,” you start, but he cuts you off with another kiss, this time on your temple.

“Shh, just relax,” he insists. “Everything can wait. Right now, you need to sleep and we have tomorrow, right?”

You finally give in, your head resting against his chest as he carries you. You can hear his heartbeat, steady and comforting, and it lulls you further into drowsiness. He lays you down gently on the bed and tucks you in, his hands warm and soothing as they adjust the blankets around you.

“Love you so much.”

“I love you, darling,” he replies, slipping into bed beside you and wrapping his arms around you. He holds you close, his body warm and comforting against yours. “Now sleep, love. I’m right here.”

Chapter 16

Word Count :1291

This is another short chapter to have something written this is Matty and Denise

Just parents caring : mention of slight eating disorder

Matty's POV

"Matty your mums here for you", Ross informs me when he comes back with another cup of coffee, he made me one but I guess if mums here I'll have to leave it and he can have it later. I clamber of his bed sighing as I go as I'd just gotten comfy and I don't want to go I hug him goodbye and he tells me to let him know if I need anything.

I grab my rucksack from the door and make my way outside seeing my mum waiting for me outside of the car she came over to me and folds me into her arms "hiya son" , I half hug her , she only just saw me this morning it's not like I've been gone for days .

"You saw this morning mum , you alright?", I smile at her trying to make the situation a little lighter because I know it's just going to be a handful later.

"I'm alright sweetheart , why don't you jump in and we'll have a chat yeh ?" . As she got in the car I got in the other side immediately hit with the volume of the radio

"Shit Ma , could you turn that down Jesus , why's it so loud ?", She looked at me like I had three heads then reached for the stereo turning it down for me. Then starts up the car, waving goodbye to Ross

"It was even that loud Matty, So what's going then?, Ross said your having a hell of a time right now". I really don't want to get into it right now, so I just shrug and lean my head against the window feeling the vibrations going right through me, closing my eyes so I can drown out everything around "Come on love I can see it myself, Can you please be honest with me ?"

"It's just a whole load of everything Mum, Where do you want me to start"

We drive for a while and just talking about everything and anything I can to help her understand what's going on in my head , talking about school and how I'm scared that everything is changing, how much I hate how everything is affecting me, that it's a constant battle everyday to just be okay and she'll listening to me. Not interrupting me , just listening. I don't tell her about the drugs though because I know she'll be upset and I don't want to upset her . She pulls up to the Mcdonalds drive through both mum and dad know that it's where I like to get coffee it's quick and easy.

"Did Ross feed you love !", why did I just know that was coming. I shake my head no but let her know that Ross did try but I argued that I wouldn't want it if he did because I wasn’t hungry, my appetite is just gone

"Love you've barley eaten in like 3 days , do we need to go see Dr Adrian again?". Dr Adrian was the doctor my parents had taken me too when I started having food issues , he gave me supplements to help me get back on track and they did a fine job but since maybe January I just haven't had the best appetite, It got easier to hide as time went on I suppose. "We can see him again you know , he'll help you get back on track".

"Nah , I don't want too , I'm just not that hungry right now" . She still pulled up anyway "Can't I just get a coffee Ma."

"I'll get you a coffee but you need to get something to eat you can save it for later but I'd like to see you get something to eat please" . We're just at the drive in the person has already asked us what we'd like I swear this is just the most awkward this could be

"Alright fine uh , I don't know just get me a cheeseburger then and a Toffee Latte" . Literally even at the thought of eating my stomach is churning but if it's what my Mum needs then so be it.

"Right wasn't that easy", My mum orders food for herself as-well, I go straight for the coffee once it's handed to us the warmth of the cupboard cups really relaxes my hands feels like a warm hand in mine.

"Thanks" . I left the cheeseburger is the bag for now as my Mum drove off, I don't quite know where she's going yet but I'm sure I'll learn soon enough. "Hey Ma?"

"Yes Son?", She looks at me while she's driving quizzical look on her face.

"What's going on with you and Dad?". I've never brung it up with them but I know they've been arguing a lot, and dad sleeps on the couch at night, when he's home that is. I know she cries most nights

"Nothing that I need you to worry about Son , it's just marriage stuff that everyone has , we'll sort it , but I need you not to worry"

"But I do worry Mum, you know uh Ross thinks it might be anxiety, that's why everything stresses me out, do you think I might be able to get help with that" , shes looking at me again but she seems happy that there's things that could help.

"Anxiety is something that we can get you help for but it's not going to be easy and we won't always know what to do but there is ways , we can see if Dr Adrian can help with that". We're on our way home now I think. "We can talk to your dad as-well if you like and we'll work on it together love"

"That sounds good Mum , but don't tell dad everything, can we leave some stuff for dads sake I don't want him to get all protective like he does" , I love my dad and he's always protective when things go wrong and he's so good at everything but when he gets protective he gets all weird

"Right love I'm glad you've spoken to me but I really need you to keep being honest with me, talking to me when your feeling upset or scared okay?"

"I'll try mum I promise" , we pull up outside the house and once we're inside I tell mum I’m going for a shower I feel groggy even though I haven't even done anything, and on my way I decide to message George , I haven't spoken to him all day and I actually miss him

I send him a message "hiya George , I'm sorry I haven't spoken all day, today got really busy and I spent a lot of time talking with people about what's going on, but I'm going to be honest with you right now too , I missed you" , I know I don't even know him and it can be weird missing someone you've never met but I do, it's really helped having him to talk too , he doesn't know my past so doesn't bring stuff up that others might. After sending the text I just hop in the shower and take my time to have an actual proper good shower. Shampooing and Conditioning my hair , lathered up in soap I'm finally feel clean. The heat is really relaxing I wish I could stay here forever. Once I've finished, I jump out and brush my teeth and comb my hair a little staying wrapped in my towel I climb onto my bed and just lay there for a while. It's calming just laying in the quiet in the dark of your own room nothing to think about

nine people you’d like to get to know better

tagged by: @justanamesstuff

last song: currently listening to Undo (The 1975 )

currently watching: I’m trying to watch Transatlantic but also I’m also rewatching Queer as Folk

current obsession: That’s Easily George Daniel 😂❤️

currently reading: I don’t read much I started reading the first Percy Jackson book months ago and still haven’t finished but I really just Read MattyxGeorge Fanfics

tagging: @throughthepostmodernlens @puffpasstea @medeas-chariot

I don’t really know nine people but hey ho

Matty in his Johnny Knoxville era

WHY DID I JUST REALISE JACK ANTONOFF WAS THE DRUMMER IN FUN!!! WTF 😳

Chapter 8

Word count : 3793

This is also from George’s POV , this chapter took so long to put together and it was really hard to find the right things to say at points but I think this might be one of my favourites

George's POV

I woke up multiple time that night and into the early morning maybe it was a subconscious effort I was making to be there for Matty if he woke because I know he really needed someone to rely on. I can do that right, others have done it for me. It can't be that hard. What time is it, I looked over to my Alarm clock that was blinking violently at me letting me know that it was only 3:15, Damn that's far to early to be thinking so deeply about anything yet. Do I have a joint to calm me down?, Yes I think maybe I might. After rolling the joint I saunter over to my window to watch the quiet London suburb come to life. The street lights were dimming and the sunrise was a coccofany of oranges and pinks bleeding together looking like a real life Claude Monet painting spilling from the early morning sky. The amount of sunrise pictures I actually ave collected on my phone over the last few years is wild. I'd send them to Laura my exgirlfriend in the mornings when she's had a rough day, Maybe Matty would like that . I pick up my phone from the bedside table and quickly snap a pick and send it to him with a little note of.

"I hope this makes you smile."

I don't know if he would even enjoy it but I'd like to hope it would help.Once I've exhausted all the fumes from the joint my brain feels more clear so I think I'll try to get a little more sleep.

4 hours would be just grand.

The next time I am woken by my alarm going off right next to and quite frankly scaring me half to death. Blinking awake I realise Matty's call is no longer connected. That a little disappointing but I really hope I made his night somewhat better.

Anyway it's time to get up now I guess. On my way to the bathroom I knock on my sisters door to make sure there awake and to make them aware I have first dips on the shower. "By Christ it's cold in here". The bathroom is even colder than my bedroom, I swear this house is actually a fucking igloo sometimes. I turn the shower on and wait for the steam to envelope the room before stepping in the heat of the shower really relaxing my stiff muscles.

I had time to think in the shower about how to understand Matty's issues and how to help him. I think people always have there best thoughts and ideas in showers it's the calmness of it all. The calm before the storm of the day if you please.

Once I'm out it's now warm in the room the steam sticking to me so I quickly get dressed so I don't suffocate in the heat and then open the window to defuse the room. Leaving the room back into my bedroom I set my bag up again for the day and finally pick up my phone to see any message I had a few from Adam and a Snapchat from Matty I sit down on my bed and open it, it's just him layed in bed smiling "damn the colours in the sunrise." Ay he liked it, I reply back "Good morning love". I know I probably shouldn't be getting to attached to someone I barley even know but I want to help the most I can and showing you care helps right?. I don't have to leave for at least another half hour so I take out my laptop and start muddeling through some mixes I have to see if I can make a good track just to occupy my mind. Then at that Matty replies he's now in his uniform he's looking pale still but at least a little more put together than yesterday "g'morning G" along with a song attached "The Rock Show" by Blink-182 that's not a bad song not the best but maybe there's a reason he picked that or maybe it's just a song he likes. I reply back showing him I'm all ready for school "oh look at you school ready , also that's a classic tune bro" . This track just won't flow it doesn't even have a name but maybe I'll get there soon I've got two weeks before I have to turn it in I'm sure I'll get there it's a lot of sounds and noises really nothing mixed properly yet music production is what I want to do one day so hopefully I can pull this off. After another ten minutes the track begins to annoy me so I stick my laptop in my rucksack and just decide to leave a little early to see Adam and Joe. Matty messages back while on my walk he's also outside he's got a joint in his hand and he's actually smiling "yeh man it's a get up and go song you know, but anyway yeh I look ready for school but can't say I'm mentally prepared in all honesty". Here we go I can be a knight in sighting armour for him. "How you feeling today?."

His reply comes almost immediately "I'm not gunna sit here and lie and say I feel on top of the world or even good yet but having someone watch over me last night felt good, thank you man"

"Anymore sickness this morning, Are you sure you should be going in today." I'm waiting at the bus stop now with a bunch of other kids one of them knows Laura so sits there sending me evils the whole time like it was my fault we split but really it wasn't I stick in my headphones and drown out the world while I wait for the bus. Matty's reply come through just as the bus turns round the corner

"I haven't been sick yet but I've got maths first, I'm just doing it with my head of year this morning rather than in the actual class but my stomach and head are still swimming , I should be okay though."

"Can you promise you'll keep me updated on how your feeling today and if you do get sick let me know , I know there's not really anything I can do but I just feel the need to look after you"

"That's great but I can look after myself I don't want to stress you, but I will tell you if I get worse"

I board the bus after showing the driver my bus card and make my way to the back shoving my large frame into the very corner, hiding myself away from other people who may board. I watch the world fly by around me, the school is a twenty minute ride away it gives me time to message Adam realising I'd never actually replied.

"Where we're you last night man"

"Are you coming to school"

I totally forgot I had said I was going to Adams last night

"Yo dude I am so sorry I got caught up with something last night I really am sorry I'll come over tonight if that's okay, and yeh I'm on the bus now, I'm sorry again"

"Bro you weren't seriously up all night trying to get Laura back we're you we've been over this"

"No I wasn't , I haven't spoke to her in like 2 days bro"

Adam is always so quick with replies I don't know how he does it.

"Then what we're you doing"

"I was just helping a friend, they were having a tough night so I was hanging with them to calm them down ."

Mid way through the conversation with Adam another snap from Matty come through so I click through my home screen and select Snapchat opening Matty's message it's just him in his head of years office I'd assume and he already looks done with it. I snap back with a laugh "you already finished with it bro ? How longs it been 5 minutes"

He replies immediately but I miss it as I start to get my stuff together to get back off the bus and meet Adam at the front gates where I always meet him.

He's stood there with his new girlfriend and Joel, Adam is the most mature of us guys he knew how to treat people right , he was the smartest and he just understood people , maybe he could help me understand Matty emotionally.I wave once I get off the bus so I can grab his attention we nod at one other and Joel comes running over grappling me into his arms "Adam was just telling us you were up all night chatting up some new fling" . Joel was the gossip.

"I never said that, I was helping a friend, how is that chatting up a new fling?" I put quote marks up when I said "new fling" because I don't thing I even had an old fling I've only ever been with two people Laura and Joel himself yeh im bisexual. We were young though so we didn't really know anything we kissed a few times and we held hands and did cute stuff together but we didn't know anything but hey he was cute but things were different with Laura I knew what to do and how to do it and I always went through with stuff and played the motions but I can't really say I enjoyed it that much like yeh I loved her and we dated for quite some time but if I really think about it I didn't like her sexual. I loved her but as a friend I suppose I just thought it was different because she was the only girl who's ever shown me any attention.

We make our way to the building we all had music first thing so we made our way there all messing about and shoving each other around as we spoke Adam and Joel sat next to each other and I sat next to Carly Adams new girl, he'd been pinning over her for months, maybe even years I'm so happy he finally got the balls to ask her.

When we sit down Adam and Joel get caught up in a conversation about the new guitar Adam just bought and Carly turns to me "So the new imagery friend are they cute?"

"Um ....he really is only a friend he's having a really hard time and I've only known I'm like 42 hours maybe not even that there's no way I'd be looking at him in that way". I feel myself blush anyway because although we haven't known each other long I can still appreciate when someone is attractive "but uh yeh if your asking he's actually so attractive but I don't even know if he's gay". I scratch the back of my head and fidget in my chair a little as she's still looking at me "but I'm really just helping him get over whatever is bothering him"

"But would you like to get to know him and maybe like be in his life as more than just someone who helps him?"

"Maybe once he's better I'd love to see where the friendship take us". While talking about him I realise I hadn't noticed a reply for a while so I pick up my phone to check and yes there it is a message sent ten minutes ago I open it to see his face his eyes are bright and he's pulling on a single curl pulling it though his hand "I'm just bored is all , Miss Conner's isn't here yet, but I was just thinking about taking up that offer of you made me about helping with my maths GCSE". I start smiling at the fact that he was thinking about me, then set myself straight that he was only remembering a conversation we had but just as I'm about to reply Carly taps me "hey let me see" . I turn my phone toward her so she can see him and I'm smiling at her "wow he really is pretty"

"Yeh" I turn my phone back to myself and reply with just a message saying that I'd very much be down to help him whenever he needed it and put a small kiss after it just to test my luck and shove my phone back in my pocket because if he's going to be with his head of year all day he won't be allowed much time to reply and just with the my teacher walks in Mr Gardner the coolest teacher one could ever have. He's always helped me a little more than others I guess and he's always said he sees me going places. I've brung him a few demos over the last few years. He starts talking about todays lesson. He's really just giving us extra time to prepare our new mixes. I roll my eyes and sigh because this new demo has just had me defeated for a few days now and I just can't get it right. But he only speak for about ten minutes and let's us get on with our respective challenges this is when I turn back to Carly "Hey do you think you or Adam would be able to give me some advice, maybe you because you might be more sensitive about it with you being a girl and all"

"Sure what's up " she's still tapping away on her laptop while she's talking to me , very much engrossed in the work she's doing.

"We'll uh Matty that's the name of the guy I'm talking to is having a really tough time from what I can gather and he's been ill , I haven't witnessed them but he's cried a lot so he's possibly having panic attacks don't quote me on that , he's thrown up like 3 times in the space I've known him , he's so lost in his own head and I don't know how to help him"

"We'll do you know what's bothering him, he might just be sick and not coping very well because some people get like that when there sick they get tired easy"

I take out my laptop to try and get something done while talking to her if I have something to keep my mind at rest I might not get too nervous talking about it "He hasn't really told me anything other than he's stressing about exams and that he's really in his head right now"

"We'll really all you can do is be there for him , like how did you help Laura when she needed it" she looked at me then with a somewhat questionable look on her face.

"I could always just be there whenever she needed me and i just stuck around and talked her through stuff, but this is different I barley know him but I feel overprotective of him" the blush starts to creep up my neck and onto my face I try not to look at Carly and stay focused on the screen in front of me.

"Someone's smitten already are we." She's smiling at me knowingly , knowing that I can get attached to people really quick. It's actually amazing to think how quickly I can get attached to people but yet never having fully been in love. I'm just a hopeless romantic who feels the need to protect people. K night always there to save the damsel in distress so the saying goes.

"No I'm not smitten, he's just different he intrigues me is all?". He does interest me, he's like a lost soul trying to find a distraction in a future dystopian hell. Trying to fill a void. Trying to find himself. That could be the name of the track Lostmyhead. I know it's not my head that's lost but it just feels right. Now that I've got a name I can get the understanding for the track and I can maybe get Matty's input. I don't know if he's that into music but his in put might really be good. It's all coming together I plug in my headphones so I can really try it out. The synths and guitars really coming together pulling me into a feeling of uncertainty. Maybe this is what Matty feels like right now. It just needs lyrics to pull it together but I can do that another time but for now these notes and instruments coming together in my ears helps me understand how it much feel in his head.

With that I take my phone out and I message Matty "I have something I'd like to show you when you have time". I know he's probably not going to get it until break but it's there for him when he's ready I then put my phone away and hear the bell ring right through me and shudder at the sudden ringing

My next lesson of the day is computer science, this class is really uneventful all the time. I don't have much people to talk to in this class it's very quiet an all these kids are mad smart so I just keep to myself but the demo is constantly on my mind, keeping me distracted from any work really. I find myself constantly looking at my phone waiting for a reply which got me into trouble a few times . my hands were itching to call him to let him hear it but I know that's not going to do anyone any good and by the last time I check my phone the teacher then comes over to me "Mr Daniel this is the last time unfortunately, if I see that phone out again I will have to confiscate it". I shove it back into my pocket and get back to m work that was barley even started "sorry sir"

Break time rolls around soon though and I see I do have a few messages from Matty only five minutes after I'd put my phone away for good. They read as follows

"Thank you man honestly x"

"Miss Conner's is literally driving me insane right now x "

"What do you wanna show me" the last one was of his face he looks quite alright so it gives me a second to breath he looks like he's outside and there's a couple of lads behind him looking like there talking to him.

I sit down with my break apple juice and a ham sandwich boring I know but it's school what do you expect and answer him while the others are occupied "I've been producing a demo track for my Music portfolio and I'd really love it if you'd be listen to it"

He's messages back almost instantly the biggest smile on his face like the last day didn't even happen "bro I'd love that, music is literally everything, is it just instrumental or does it have lyrics?"

"Just instrumental right not but it could really use lyrics." I perk up at how excited he sounded, sitting up straight on these ridiculous plastic seats that I barley fit on.

Another immediate message "I write , would it be cool if I give it a listen and see if I can add the lyrics to it or is that weird"

"Nah bro go ahead I'll send it over, have you got something for break!?". I know he's excited right now but I still feel the need to look after him.

"My mum gave me a few breakfast bars and I was pretty much ordered to ave em 😂"

"Why's that ?" . Concern starts to drip back into my brain, Jesus this guy is going to be the end of me I swear to god, am I too attached already ?, maybe but it's done now

"I didn't eat yesterday and she doesn't want me to be sick again but we'll just have to see if I can keep down ay" he sent that with a picture of himself with his fingers crossed. There's still uncertainty laced behind his eyes but I don't want to freak him out so I just send him a picture in basically a replica of his "we'll let me know yeh , you've got to be starving bro , but hopefully it helps you stomach settle , how's your head ?"

"Still buzzing like mad but I'm dealing with it Ross gave me pain killers before break and there helping a bit?"

"How was your lessons with Miss Conner's is it ? , you said she was driving you insane is that a bad thing". I smile as he seems to be doing alot better than yesterday although I know this conversation is really nothing to go by but he's got people there to help too.

"Man she just won't shut up , it's the concerned teacher act that does my head in she's been on my back since I got in and my maths lesson with her went on for hours Jesus"

"Oh man nah I couldn't be doing that , what do you have next , are you going to that or will you still be with her ?"

"I'm going to try just go to my next lesson, it's German I don't mind that class to much, but I think I'll go back to miss for my class after lunch cuz im still a bit arghh you know and physics won't be good"

"Im glad your giving it a try but you know where she is if you do need her before last class yeh "

"Yeh she says I can go back at any point , thanks for being there darlin x" . I can feel myself blush all over again and I know I'm smiling like an idiot. Joel and Adam are looking at me. Adam chimes in.

"You were defiantly chatting someone up last night george my guy" he shoves me lightly as the bell goes signalling the end of break and we make our way to our next classes I feel alot lighter after that conversation.