touya todoroki (dabi)
burnt edges, unread messages | smau ⤷ not dating. not nothing. something in between. something you never got to name before it was gone. domesticated | smau ⤷ parenthood was not in the plan, but now there's a glitter drawing of you and touya on the fridge
you know he's not yours, but you'd still pick him in every lifetime. the worst part? he'd let you. (2785 words)
you never meant to fall into it.
and maybe that's the problem.
because things that fall tend to break, and you? you've never been particularly good at knowing when to catch yourself.
it starts with nothing. not even a spark, not a clear moment. no dramatic beginning. no pivotal shift in atmosphere. he just... shows up one night. stands in the doorway of your apartment with wind in his hair and fatigue under his eyes and a grin that looks like it's trying to apologize for both.
you don't remember who invited him. maybe he just appeared. you wouldn't put it past him.
you only remember letting him in.
he takes up space easily. like he's always belonged there. like the couch remembers his weight. like your walls never had a choice in loving the sound of his voice.
he doesn't say much. he never really has to.
he leans against the kitchen counter while you make tea, not even asking what kind, just accepting the mug with his usual crooked smile and a quiet, "you're a saint."
he doesn't drink it.
he just holds it between his hands, steam rising between his fingers like an offering he doesn't quite believe he deserves.
you sit in silence for a while. the kind of silence that feels earned. he doesn't fill it with nonsense. he lets it exist between you, thick and soft and settled like dust on a bookshelf no one has the heart to clean.
"you don't sleep much, huh?" he says eventually, with the kind of voice that makes the night lean in to listen.
you shrug. "not when the world's this loud."
he nods like he understands. like he feels it too. maybe he does.
he spends the night—not in your bed, never in your bed—but on the couch. boots off, one arm lazily thrown over his eyes like the darkness is too much. there's tension in his shoulders even when he sleeps.
you watch him from the doorway longer than you should. tell yourself it's because he's in your home. that you're being cautious.
it's not that.
it's never that.
₊˚⊹ ᰔ
he returns three nights later.
you don't ask why.
he starts showing up regularly. not every night, but often enough that you start leaving the door unlocked out of habit. he never uses a key. he always knocks, even when it's past midnight, even when you're both pretending he hasn't been there three times this week.
he doesn't talk about work. never talks about heroes or headlines or what happens after he walks out of your door and lets the world chew him up again.
you don't ask.
you offer him a space. warmth. the silence he pretends not to need.
he offers... something else. something half-shaped. a hand on your back when you pass each other in the kitchen. a smirk when you call him out on it. snacks left on the counter. a blanket draped over your shoulders when you fall asleep on the couch, though he'll swear it wasn't him.
and one night, when you're both sitting cross-legged on the kitchen floor with half a bottle of something nameless between you, he leans in and kisses you.
it's not hungry. not sharp. not even all that deep.
it's lazy. gentle. like he forgot himself and remembered you in the same breath.
when he pulls back, he just grins. "nice lips," he murmurs. "don't let anyone tell you different."
and then he's gone.
you press your fingers to your mouth and pretend it didn't mean anything. pretend it was just a drunk impulse. a thing he does. a fluke.
you tell yourself it won't happen again.
it does.
not the kiss—but the weight of it. the imprint.
the moments start to blur together. late night dinners. half-slept mornings. you learn the exact sound his jacket makes when it hits your couch. the rhythm of his breath when he falls asleep sitting up. the way his voice drops when he's tired, softening like he's forgotten he's not supposed to be real around you.
you learn how to love him without touching him.
he makes it easy.
₊˚⊹ ᰔ
you don't talk about what this is.
not once.
not when he brings you takeout and eats with you in silence. not when he falls asleep with his head on your shoulder. not when he disappears for four days and comes back without a word and looks at you like he never left.
you tell yourself it doesn't matter.
because he's not cruel.
he never leads you on—not really. never calls you his. never asks you to stay. never says he loves you.
he just makes it feel like he does.
and maybe that's worse.
maybe if he'd been colder, you would've walked away by now. maybe if he'd kissed you like he didn't mean it, you wouldn't still taste him in your coffee. maybe if he didn't smile like you were the only person in the room—maybe then you'd be able to sleep at night without checking your phone for his name.
but he does. and you can't.
you try to pretend it's fine.
you're adults. capable of detachment. you know how this goes. some people just need somewhere to land. someone who doesn't ask questions. someone who lets them rest.
you can be that.
and for a while, you convince yourself you're okay with it.
because sometimes he looks at you and you think—maybe.
maybe this could be something.
maybe he just needs time.
maybe you're the only one who sees him like this—tired and soft and human.
maybe that matters.
₊˚⊹ ᰔ
one night, he cooks for you.
it's a disaster. the pasta overboils, the sauce burns, and he sets off your smoke alarm because he forgets how sensitive it is.
you sit on the floor with him, coughing and laughing, fanning smoke with a magazine while he yells at your ceiling.
when it finally clears, he sits beside you. knees touching. arms brushing. smelling like burnt garlic and relief.
he doesn't kiss you that night.
but he falls asleep in your lap, and you thread your fingers through his hair and pretend he's yours.
he's not.
but he lets you pretend.
₊˚⊹ ᰔ
"you're good at this," he says once, curled up in your blanket, the ends of his hair brushing your collarbone.
"what?"
"letting me stay."
you don't answer.
he doesn't expect you to.
˚⊹ ᰔ
you kiss again, weeks later.
it's different.
it's not light or easy or careless. it's slow. warm. aching.
he holds your face like it's glass. kisses you like he's afraid to stop. touches you like he's saying something he doesn't have the words for.
and afterward, he rests his forehead against yours and murmurs, "you always feel like home."
and you wonder if maybe this is something.
maybe this is real.
but then he gets up. leaves without looking back. and you stay awake all night, staring at the ceiling, wondering what you did wrong.
˚⊹ ᰔ
your friends start to notice.
"you've been distracted," one of them says.
"i'm fine," you lie.
they don't press. but they look at you like they know.
you delete the messages you want to send him. never hit call. never ask where he is when he disappears for days, weeks, reappears with new bruises and an easy smile and nothing in his eyes.
you pretend not to care.
but your hands shake when you wash his mug.
˚⊹ ᰔ
he shows up again.
you open the door. he looks tired.
you don't ask why.
he leans against the frame like he belongs there. like he knows you'll let him in.
and you do.
he doesn't kiss you this time. doesn't speak.
he just lays beside you on the couch. not touching. not sleeping. just breathing.
you turn your head.
he doesn't look at you.
you wonder if he's already left.
˚⊹ ᰔ
you don't remember the last time he said your name.
you don't remember the last time you said no.
˚⊹ ᰔ
there's no end. not yet.
there's just the quiet stretch of something wearing thin. the slow suffocation of wanting too much from someone who never offered you anything in the first place.
you tell yourself it's fine.
you knew what this was.
he never said it would be more.
but you wish—god, you wish—he hadn't made it feel so much like love.
because now, you don't know how to unfeel it.
you don't know how to stop opening the door when he knocks. how to stop hearing your name in the silence between his sentences. how to stop hoping.
and worst of all?
you don't want to.
not yet.
maybe not ever.
˚⊹ ᰔ
you don't talk about it.
the situation. the dynamic. the... thing between you.
there's no language for it. not really.
it's not a relationship. not a friendship. not even a fling.
but it's something. it has weight. it has presence. it takes up room in your life and your chest and your plans and your future in the way real things are supposed to. only it doesn't behave like something real. it behaves like a ghost with too much nerve. a shadow that leaves fingerprints on your heart but disappears when the light comes on.
you try to explain it to a friend once. someone who notices the way you pause when your phone buzzes. the way your smile flickers when it doesn't.
"is it serious?" they ask.
you open your mouth, but nothing comes out.
because how do you explain it? how do you articulate the emotional toll of being almost loved?
so you shrug. "it's nothing."
you lie.
but you shouldn't have to.
˚⊹ ᰔ
hawks—no, keigo, because he insists you call him that when you're alone, like that somehow makes him more honest—isn't cruel.
that's what you keep coming back to.
he never promises you anything. never strings you along with declarations or dates or matching mugs in the cupboard. he doesn't label this. doesn't even try.
but he lets you sit close. lets you hold his wrist when he's pacing and won't tell you what's wrong. lets you run your fingers through his hair when he comes back with blood under his nails.
he lets you treat him like someone you love.
and in return?
he lets you pretend he loves you back.
˚⊹ ᰔ
you try to find clarity in the small things.
like in the way he leans toward you in crowds. the way his eyes soften when he hands you a drink. the way he listens when you talk about things that don't matter.
but the truth is, affection doesn't equal intention.
and you're tired of translating his silence into possibility.
˚⊹ ᰔ
he disappears for two weeks.
no warning. no explanation. just gone.
the first few days you check your phone constantly. reread old messages. try to remember if you said something wrong. if you asked for too much. if he finally got bored of the emotional middle ground you let him live in.
the silence grows louder.
by the time the seventh day passes, it becomes a roar in your head.
you don't call. you don't text.
you tell yourself it's a boundary.
it's not. it's fear.
because if you reach out first, you won't like the answer.
˚⊹ ᰔ
he shows up on a tuesday.
doesn't knock. just opens your door like nothing's happened. like it hasn't been days since he last looked at you. like he didn't vanish into the wind and leave you to rot in your own expectations.
he drops his bag by the couch. throws himself down and stretches like a cat, muscles flexing under his shirt, wings shifting slightly.
"miss me?" he says with a grin.
your heart cracks. so quietly, so precisely, you barely feel it.
you sit beside him. don't say anything.
he throws an arm around your shoulder like this is normal. like you're normal.
"sorry," he says casually. "work stuff."
you nod.
he doesn't elaborate.
you don't ask.
and the silence between you stops being safe. it becomes suffocating.
˚⊹ ᰔ
you start pulling away in increments.
you don't make him tea anymore when he shows up. you don't wait for him to call. you stop folding his jacket when he leaves it draped over your chair. you stop making room in your drawer for the little things he forgets behind.
and he notices. of course he does.
he notices the tension in your jaw when he touches you. the fact that you turn your face away when he leans in like he might kiss you. the way you no longer meet his eyes when you say goodnight.
he doesn't say anything.
but one night, when you're both watching some movie neither of you are paying attention to, he speaks into the dark.
"you okay?"
you hesitate.
then: "i'm tired."
he hums. "long day?"
you don't answer, and he doesn't ask again.
˚⊹ ᰔ
your friends start asking questions. real ones.
"is this working for you?" "what do you want out of this?" "are you happy?"
you laugh them off.
but the ache in your chest lingers.
because no. you're not happy. not really.
you're in love with someone who only shows up when it's convenient. who never shares the parts of himself that matter. who touches you with familiar hands but guards his heart like it's state property.
and you? you've built a home out of his shadows. you've memorized a version of him that doesn't even belong to you.
you don't want to do this anymore.
˚⊹ ᰔ
but you still do.
because it's better than nothing.
because the alternative is letting him go.
and that feels like losing something you never got to keep in the first place.
˚⊹ ᰔ
then one night, it changes.
not loudly. not dramatically.
just... changes.
you're sitting on the floor again, legs stretched in front of you, a blanket around your shoulders and the tv on low. keigo's beside you, but not touching. for once, there's real distance.
you glance at him.
he's staring at the screen, eyes unfocused.
you don't recognize his expression.
you whisper, "why do you keep coming here?"
he blinks. looks at you. "what do you mean?"
you shrug. "i mean... you never talk. you disappear. you show up without warning. and i let you. every time. i don't ask for anything, and you know that."
he stays quiet.
"so why do you keep coming back?"
the silence stretches. you think maybe he won't answer.
then he says, soft: "because you're the only place i don't have to lie."
your stomach twists.
because that should mean something. it almost does.
but then you realize—
he's not saying he wants you. he's saying he likes what you give him.
peace. comfort. quiet.
you're not a person to him. you're a haven.
and he never had any intention of staying.
you breathe in, slowly, and nod.
"okay."
he looks at you, confused. "okay?"
you stand. your knees ache. your chest does too.
"you can go now."
he rises slowly, uncertainty flickering across his face for the first time. "what?"
you repeat it. "you can go."
he studies you. then smiles, like it's a joke. "don't be dramatic."
you stare at him. "i'm not."
something in his expression falters. "look," he says. "i didn't mean to—"
"i know," you say. "that's the problem."
he goes quiet again.
you continue, softer now. "you didn't mean to kiss me. or stay. or sleep here. or come back. or look at me like that. or make me feel like you wanted something real. and you think that's enough. that because you never said you cared, you didn't have to."
his mouth opens, then closes.
you're tired. so, so tired.
"you never had to lie to hurt me, keigo," you whisper. "you just had to let me believe you wanted me here."
he doesn't argue. he doesn't reach for you. he just stands there.
quiet.
just like always.
you don't ask him again to leave.
he just does. eventually.
without slamming the door. without saying goodbye.
and maybe that's what breaks you.
because there's nothing dramatic to hold on to. no final fight. no angry words. no declarations.
just absence.
and that hurts more than anything else.
˚⊹ ᰔ
you sit in the quiet after he's gone. your blanket falls off your shoulders and you don't pick it up. you sit there until the sun starts to rise.
and when your phone buzzes hours later, you don't check it.
because you already know—
it's not him.
it never really was.
JADEEE I LOVE UR SMAUS they are so yummy
I LOCE YOU!!!!
i used to lurk on tumblr bad and i stalked u constantly so ur actually a big inspiration 😛
izuku midoriya
extra credit | smau ⤷ midoriya agrees to tutor UA's least interested student for extra credit ts pmo ong | smau ⟶ part ii ⤷ midoriya is a hero, a strategist, a prodigy—and a little brother who steals your leftovers and pisses you off just for you | smau ⤷ in which you hate everyone—except izuku midoriya. unfortunately for you, he's also dangerously good at getting under your skin schedule disruption: you | smau + fic ⤷ you and izuku midoriya have ben best friends forever. he's busy, responsible, always on schedule—you're not. but when the night goes sideways, he drops everything to come get you. just us? | smau ⤷ just two best friends hanging out one-on-one every weekend, doing couple things, and totally not dating (yet) ctrl + alt + detest | smau ⤷ you're tied at the top of the class, stuck in a group project, and ignoring the fact that midoriya looks really good in library lighting.
a short, slow-burn library romance, ft. one blueberry muffin, exactly zero jokes, and a boy who takes flashcards way too seriously. (4597 words)
you meet tenya iida under circumstances that can only be described as tragically collegiate: a peer-led study group in the furthest, quietest corner of the campus library, surrounded by half-dead fluorescent bulbs and the palpable despair of students on the brink of burnout.
it's the third week of the semester, and you're already floundering.
you hadn't intended to be. in theory, you were going to stay on top of things—read the chapters early, color-code your notes, maybe even start a study group of your own. but somewhere between sleep deprivation, an avalanche of discussion posts, and the mysterious black hole that is the university's online portal, you fell behind. hard.
introduction to public policy has been your academic nemesis from the start. the textbook reads like legal jargon swallowed a thesaurus. the professor talks in dense, circular metaphors. every quiz is a minefield of trick questions and ambiguous phrasing. you are, in every sense of the word, academically drowning.
so when a brightly colored flyer promising a "collaborative review session" caught your eye on the bulletin board outside the lecture hall, you didn't think twice. you showed up. desperate. caffeinated. terminally underprepared.
and now you regret everything.
the room smells like dry-erase markers and nervous sweat. a whiteboard at the front is covered in illegible graphs. someone has already spilled a latte on the floor. the guy leading the group talks fast and loud, his explanations full of buzzwords and gestures but lacking anything remotely useful. you suspect he's just regurgitating the study guide at a slightly faster pace.
the other students seem to agree.
one by one, they start to trickle out. a girl leaves with the excuse of "office hours." a guy mutters something about dinner. another just quietly packs up and disappears, not even bothering with a pretense.
by the end of the hour, only two people remain: you, clinging to a futile hope of salvaging your gpa... and him.
he sits across from you with the kind of posture that makes your back ache just looking at him. tall, composed, and absurdly polished—like someone who writes essays three days early and carries a spare pen in case someone forgets theirs. his navy-blue sweater is wrinkle-free. his glasses catch the dim library light. his notes are not just color-coded—they're thematically organized, annotated with footnotes and marginalia in tiny, immaculate handwriting.
he hasn't spoken once. he hasn't needed to.
he radiates competence like it's a moral obligation.
"you're still here?" you ask, more surprise than judgment.
the boy looks up, blinking as if surfacing from a well of deep concentration. he adjusts his glasses with a practiced motion.
"yes," he says, voice clipped and oddly formal. "you are as well."
you arch an eyebrow. "no offense, but... are you actually getting something out of this?"
his expression doesn't change, but he tilts his head slightly—almost like he's assessing you.
"of course," he replies. "engaging in structured group review enhances cognitive retention and contextual understanding. it's an effective method for consolidating knowledge prior to a high-stakes assessment."
you blink. "so... yes?"
he doesn't hesitate. "yes."
you snort—audibly. it escapes before you can stop it. and to your surprise, a faint smile flickers across his mouth.
"i'm tenya iida," he says, extending a hand across the table with the kind of precision reserved for formal introductions at university mixers.
you stare at his hand for a moment, then take it. his grip is warm. steady. confident in a way that makes you sit up a little straighter.
"y/n," you say.
his smile grows just slightly. "it's a pleasure to meet you, y/n."
he releases your hand and immediately pulls out a second set of flashcards from his folder. of course he has a second set.
"would you like to quiz each other?" he asks, dead serious. "alternating questions could be a mutually beneficial method of review."
you stare at him.
he stares back.
something about him—the earnestness, the posture, the complete and utter lack of sarcasm—disarms you. it's like he's the living embodiment of academic sincerity. you're not sure whether to laugh or agree.
you do both.
"...sure."
you don't know it yet, but that's the beginning.
⋆˚✿˖°
you don't plan on seeing him again.
it's not personal. it's just that study groups are the social equivalent of jury duty—temporary, miserable, and best forgotten. you assume tenya iida is one of those hyper-dedicated overachievers who only exist within the academic ecosystem. he probably recedes into a cloud of flashcards and moral fiber as soon as the library closes.
you are, however, proven categorically wrong the following wednesday at exactly 8:03 a.m.
you enter the campus café half-awake, mildly hostile, and fully dependent on the idea of caffeine as a substitute for sleep. the plan is simple: grab something with enough espresso to make your eye twitch, stare blankly at your phone for fifteen minutes, and pretend the crushing weight of institutional learning isn't slowly hollowing you out from the inside.
but fate—or perhaps syllabus-based divine intervention—has other plans.
because when you step inside, there he is.
same posture. same glasses. same stupidly crisp button-down like it didn't just come out of someone's laundry but graduated magna cum laude from it. he's seated at a table by the window, surrounded by highlighters arranged like soldiers, reading the textbook that has been your personal tormentor since week one.
and next to his coffee?
a single blueberry muffin.
you hesitate, caught in that weird space where it's too late to pretend you didn't see him, but also too awkward to walk past without acknowledging him.
before you can make a decision, he looks up—and smiles.
not just a polite, "ah yes, i recognize you" smile.
a real smile. brief, but sincere. like he's actually glad you're here.
he waves you over.
you hate how quickly your legs respond.
"didn't expect to see you here," you say as you slide into the seat across from him, instantly aware of how tired you look in comparison to his perfectly combed hair and terrifying punctuality.
"i study here most mornings," he replies. "the ambient noise level is consistent, and the natural lighting is optimal for focus."
you blink. "that is... alarmingly specific."
he inclines his head. "i find that consistency breeds productivity."
you want to tease him, but the truth is, it's kind of admirable. alarming. but admirable.
he gestures to the pastry between you.
"would you like half?" he asks. "it's fresh. and i believe we have, at this point, established a cordial enough rapport to justify the sharing of breakfast items."
you stare at him.
"do you always offer muffins to people you've only studied with once?"
he doesn't even flinch. "only when they look tired enough to deserve one."
your mouth twitches.
"you've been saving that line, haven't you."
he looks mildly offended. "no. though i could annotate it in my planner if you'd like."
you laugh—genuinely this time—and accept the muffin. it's warm, sweet, and annoyingly perfect. just like him.
you don't pull out your flashcards. not immediately. you sit there in companionable silence, splitting the muffin and sipping your drinks like it's something you've always done. like this is normal.
you tell yourself this isn't a date. obviously.
it's too early in the day for romance. you're both clutching textbooks like weapons. he hasn't even made a single joke. (you're not sure he knows how.)
and yet—
when he leans in to show you a section he highlighted—carefully annotated with footnotes and marginal notes that are somehow neater than your typed essays—your shoulders brush. you don't pull away.
he doesn't, either.
later, you realize that you don't even remember what chapter you reviewed.
but you remember the sound of his voice as he quietly explained it. the way he passed you the last bite of muffin without saying anything. the way his fingers curled ever so slightly when he set his pen down between you.
you remember thinking, with a strange flutter in your chest: this could be something.
not yet.
but maybe.
⋆˚✿˖°
you tell yourself this is still just about school.
you repeat it like a mantra as you meet him at the library every tuesday and thursday without fail, settling into your now-permanent seats by the windows like assigned partners in some ongoing group project that no one else remembers being assigned to. his bag always lands on the table first, followed by a reusable water bottle the size of your emotional baggage. he brings extra highlighters now—plural—and starts leaving a green one near your elbow like he’s not even thinking about it.
you, in turn, stop pretending to study anywhere else.
because the truth is, you don’t concentrate better when he’s around—not even a little. he’s distracting in the worst possible way: tall and tidy and terminally composed, with a voice like a podcast host and a smile that you pretend not to notice every time he glances over at you with something like pride in his eyes.
and the worst part?
it’s working.
your grades are going up. you understand policy terminology now. you caught yourself referencing a case study unprompted in another class, and the look your professor gave you made it feel like you’d just been knighted.
you’d thank him for it—sincerely—if he didn’t look so smug every time you nailed a quiz.
“you’ve clearly been applying yourself,” he says one evening, looking over your annotated notes like they’re some kind of sacred text.
“i’ve been applying your study methods,” you reply, then instantly regret it, because the smile he gives you in return is devastating.
and that would be fine—annoying, but fine—if it weren’t for the fact that he’s started sitting closer.
not drastically. not inappropriately. just... close.
close enough that when you both lean in to look at something on the same page, your shoulders brush. your knees knock. his hand lingers near yours when he passes you a pen, and he doesn’t move away quickly. sometimes—and this is particularly evil—his thigh rests against yours under the table for minutes at a time, and you’re too proud (and too panicked) to say anything.
you’re not flirting. not really.
you’re both too stubborn for that.
but something is happening. you just don’t know what to call it.
one thursday afternoon, the sky is gray and heavy with the threat of rain. the windows in the library fog up slightly, making the whole room feel smaller, softer, somehow more intimate. your shoes are damp. your brain is fried. you’re barely holding onto your focus.
but he’s already there, sitting at your usual table with a mug from the downstairs café and a folder labeled “legislation review: week 5.” there’s a muffin. of course there’s a muffin.
he looks up as you approach. smiles. “you’re early.”
you blink. “so are you.”
he shrugs. “anticipation is efficient.”
“what does that even mean?”
he hesitates, like he’s genuinely considering it. “it means i enjoy this.”
your heart does something stupid.
you take your seat before your face can give you away.
thirty minutes in, your brain stops processing information entirely.
you’re trying to focus. really, you are. but his leg is pressed against yours and you swear it’s getting closer every time he shifts. it’s not even the contact itself that’s distracting—it’s the fact that he doesn’t seem to notice. like it’s just normal. like this is how he always studies with people.
(does he?)
(no. he can’t.)
“y/n?” he says, and you jolt like you’ve been electrocuted.
“hm?”
“i asked if you’d like to walk through the case brief again. you seem... distant.”
you clear your throat and try not to sound like someone whose brain has just been wiped by a thigh. “yeah, no, i’m fine. just tired.”
he nods solemnly. “understandable. your coursework has been particularly intensive.”
he says it like he knows your schedule better than you do—which he might. you’ve seen his planner. you’re pretty sure he’s memorized the entire academic calendar, national holidays included.
you try to return to your notes.
you fail.
eventually, you lean back in your chair and exhale.
“okay,” you say. “i need to ask you something.”
he looks up, immediately attentive. “yes?”
you glance around—no one’s within earshot— and lean in slightly.
“this thing we do.”
he blinks. “studying?”
“no. i mean yes, but no.” you gesture vaguely between the two of you. “this. the muffins. the flashcards. the... sitting so close i can smell your laundry detergent.”
he goes still.
“i’m just trying to understand if we’re, like...” you hesitate. “is this just a really intense academic friendship or are we... flirting?”
he doesn’t speak for a long moment.
then, carefully: “i hadn’t realized my proximity was making you uncomfortable.”
“it’s not!” you say, too quickly. “it’s just... confusing.”
“confusing how?”
you fidget with the cap of your pen. “because we do things that feel... date-adjacent. and i don’t know if that’s just how you are with people or if i’m—” you stop yourself before you can say not imagining it.
his brows draw together, faintly perplexed. “i apologize. i didn’t mean to cause confusion.”
you blink. “so you are flirting?”
his ears go pink. just slightly. “i wouldn’t define it as flirting. but i do enjoy spending time with you.”
you squint at him. “that’s not a no.”
he hesitates. then, quieter: “it’s not.”
oh.
you stare at him. he stares back.
and then—like the universe can’t stand unresolved tension—your knees bump again.
but this time, he doesn’t shift away.
and neither do you.
⋆˚✿˖°
you don’t call it a date.
not out loud.
not even in your head, really—not technically. because you’re not dating. you haven’t kissed. there’s been no confession. there’s been no moment of clarity where either of you has stood dramatically in the rain and said i think about you all the time, which, honestly, is a bit disappointing.
but you still change your outfit three times before meeting him for coffee on saturday.
you still hesitate in front of the mirror, adjusting your sleeves and second-guessing your hair, muttering get a grip under your breath like it’s a prayer.
you still pause at the door to the café, one hand on the handle, and remind yourself—again—that this isn’t a date.
you’re just meeting up. casually. like friends.
friends who sometimes sit with their knees touching under library tables. friends who share muffins and steal glances and somehow always find reasons to linger a little too long in doorways.
friends who, if they weren’t so emotionally constipated, might’ve figured this out already.
but you push the door open anyway, and the little bell overhead chimes bright and familiar.
he’s already there.
of course he is.
tenya iida is punctual to the point of pathology. if you told him to meet you in the afterlife at 3:00 p.m. sharp, he’d be there early, holding a clipboard and a fully prepared powerpoint.
he’s sitting near the window, back straight, hands folded politely in his lap. his hair is a little messy from the wind outside. his sweater is navy—clean, simple, a little oversized in a way that makes you stare longer than you should.
he sees you and stands immediately, which is both adorable and completely unnecessary.
“you’re early,” he says, voice warm.
“so are you.”
he doesn’t reply, but the smile he gives you is soft around the edges.
you order something with too much caffeine and not enough nutritional value. he offers to pay, like he always does. you decline, like you always do. it’s a silent tradition now, a ritual of stubbornness. he lets it go with a quiet nod, but not without giving you that look—the one that says i was raised right and this physically pains me.
you find a booth in the corner, a little more secluded than the rest. the sun spills in through the window in soft golden streaks, and for a moment, it feels like you’re somewhere outside of time.
“i’ve never seen you wear that color,” he says as you sit down.
you glance at your shirt. “yeah? too much?”
he shakes his head immediately. “no. it suits you.”
your mouth goes a little dry.
you recover quickly, leaning back and sipping your drink like it doesn’t mean anything. like the warmth crawling up your neck is from the coffee and not the compliment.
“so,” you say, clearing your throat. “what’s on the agenda for today? rigorous academic analysis? philosophical debates about economic ethics? impromptu pop quizzes?”
he tilts his head. “i thought we might take the day off.”
you blink. “from... studying?”
“from everything.” he shrugs, a little sheepishly. “i realized we’ve never spent time together without a textbook between us.”
your heart does something strange.
“you mean like... just hang out?”
“yes.”
“like friends.”
he hesitates. just barely. “yes. like friends.”
the words hang in the air between you—awkward, uncertain, but not unkind.
you nod, slowly. “okay. yeah. we can do that.”
and you do.
you talk. not about school, not about deadlines or group projects or the upcoming midterm. you talk about dumb childhood stories and weird food preferences and the fact that he once tried to start a recycling initiative in his middle school and was very upset when no one followed the sorting chart correctly.
you tell him about your obsession with terrible reality TV. he listens with the seriousness of a man taking notes for a thesis.
he tells you about his older brother, and how much he looks up to him. you tell him about the stray cat that used to follow you home in high school, even though you never fed it.
he laughs—really laughs—when you tell him about the time you broke your nose in gym class trying to dodge a volleyball and ran straight into a bleacher.
“i’m sorry,” he says between gasps. “i don’t mean to laugh at your pain.”
“no, you do,” you say, grinning. “and it’s okay. i would too.”
at one point, your knees bump under the table again. this time, neither of you pulls away.
it’s later than you mean it to be when you finally leave the café. the sun is dipping low, the sky tinged with lavender and orange. the street is quiet, and the wind bites just enough to make you zip your jacket up.
you walk together. not toward the library, not toward another class—just aimlessly. like people who have nowhere else to be.
it’s peaceful.
and weirdly... intimate.
you’re not talking. not really. the silence between you is comfortable now, lived-in. every so often your hands brush, and you wonder—wildly, stupidly —what would happen if you just reached out.
but you don’t.
because this isn’t a date.
it’s not.
except maybe... it is.
“this was nice,” you say, when you finally reach the crosswalk where you’ll part ways.
he nods. “i enjoyed it.”
there’s a beat of silence.
“we should do it again,” you say. casually. like it doesn’t mean anything.
but he looks at you like it does.
“i’d like that,” he says. and then—“you’re very easy to be around.”
your breath catches.
you want to say something. you’re easy to be around too. i think about you when we’re not together. i don’t know if i’m imagining this but i hope i’m not.
instead, you say, “you’re weirdly charming, you know that?”
he blinks. “i—thank you?”
you grin. “it’s a compliment. mostly.”
he laughs. soft. pleased. “i’ll take it.”
he takes a small step back, like he’s about to leave —but then pauses.
“y/n?”
“yeah?”
“if this had been a date...” he clears his throat. “would that have been... agreeable to you?”
you stare at him.
then, slowly—carefully—you nod.
“yeah,” you say. “i think it would’ve been.”
he smiles. it’s small. tentative. but it lights up his whole face.
“then maybe next time, we won’t pretend.”
you feel like you’re floating.
“deal.”
he nods once. then, with a strange, lingering sort of hesitation—like he’s not ready to go yet—he turns to leave.
you watch him go.
and for the first time in a long time, you feel... hopeful.
⋆˚✿˖°
you don't know what you're expecting.
when he texts you the next morning—same time tuesday? not for studying this time. if you're free.—you stare at it for a good ten minutes before responding. not because you’re unsure of your answer (you’re not), but because the implication hits like a freight train.
not for studying.
not as friends.
just you. just him. again.
this time, it’s a little different.
this time, he’s calling it what it is.
you don’t overthink your reply (for once). you just type yeah. i’m free and throw your phone face-down before your heart can beat out of your chest.
and when tuesday rolls around, you are twenty minutes early.
you tell yourself it’s because the weather’s nice and the walk was shorter than usual and you didn’t want to cut it close. but the truth is, you’ve been ready since noon.
you’re wearing the sweater he said he liked once, months ago, after a study session where he handed you a highlighter and your fingers brushed and you both paused like the world might end. it’s not even your warmest or your nicest sweater. it’s just... the one he looked at a little too long.
you don’t want to admit what that means.
you sit in your usual seat by the window. a small table, worn edges. your coffee in hand. no textbooks. no flashcards. just the sound of the café around you and the low simmer of anticipation in your chest.
he walks in three minutes early, which is basically scandalous by iida standards.
you glance up, and the second your eyes meet, he smiles.
it’s not his usual polite, committee-appropriate smile.
it’s something else.
something softer.
he sits down across from you like he’s been doing it his whole life.
you stare at him for a second too long.
“you’re early,” he says, like it’s a fact worth noting. his voice is gentler than usual.
“so are you.”
“a rare occurrence.”
“should i be concerned?”
he laughs—quietly, warmly. “i thought you might say that.”
you both go quiet.
not awkward quiet. just... full.
full of everything you’re not saying.
you sip your drink and hope your heart doesn’t explode.
twenty minutes in, you realize you’ve forgotten what time it is.
again.
you’re talking about something stupid—a professor you both silently hate but never speak ill of in class—and he’s mimicking their voice in a whisper, hand shielding his mouth, and you’re laughing.
like genuinely, honestly laughing.
like you don’t have a hundred things weighing you down.
he always does that. makes everything feel easier. lighter.
it’s dangerous, how much you like it.
how much you like him.
you haven’t said it. not out loud. not even to yourself.
but the truth is: you’re in trouble.
deep trouble.
because tenya iida has the power to wreck you in a way no one else ever has.
not because he’s dramatic. not because he’s charming (though he is, in that annoying, understated, golden-retriever-with-a-perfect-credit-score kind of way).
but because he’s steady.
because he means things.
because when he looks at you, it’s like you’re someone worth understanding.
and you’ve never been loved gently before.
not like this.
you walk out together.
neither of you mentions how long you stayed. it’s dark out, but neither of you cares.
you walk close, side by side. your hands brush once, then again. his fingers twitch toward yours, and you pretend not to notice—not because you don’t want it, but because you’re not sure what happens if you reach back.
you talk about nothing. and everything.
he tells you about the time his older brother accidentally dyed his hair blue with a shampoo prank and how no one in their house was allowed to mention it for an entire year.
you tell him about the time you accidentally set off a fire alarm trying to microwave leftover curry in a dorm that very explicitly prohibited strong-smelling food.
“you’re a menace,” he says, laughing.
you bump your shoulder into his. “you say that like it’s a bad thing.”
he glances at you. “i didn’t say that.”
you both stop at the crosswalk—the same one where you stood days ago.
the same one where he asked if this had been a date...
you’re not pretending anymore.
and yet.
you don’t know what to say.
you just look at him, the wind brushing through your sleeves, your fingers cold where they’re shoved into your pockets.
he looks at you.
longer than before.
long enough that your heart stumbles.
and then—quietly—he says, “can i ask you something?”
you nod. “of course.”
his voice is softer than you’ve ever heard it. careful.
“why me?”
you blink. “what?”
“why... this?” he gestures gently between you. “i know i’m not the most exciting person. i’m not particularly funny or... spontaneous.”
you frown. “iida.”
“i’m just trying to understand,” he says. “why you keep showing up.”
you want to say because i like the way you talk when you’re tired, or because your laugh makes me want to listen to every dumb story you’ve ever told.
you want to say because i’ve never felt so calm next to another person in my entire life.
instead, you say, “because when i’m with you, i don’t feel like i have to be anyone else.”
his expression shifts.
his jaw tightens. his eyes soften.
he takes a step closer.
“i don’t want to mess this up,” he says.
“you’re not.”
“i don’t want to misread it.”
you exhale, a laugh escaping despite yourself. “you’re not.”
his hand lifts, hesitates—then lands gently against your cheek.
you stop breathing.
“may i kiss you?” he asks.
you nod before your brain catches up.
“yeah,” you whisper. “you may.”
and he does.
it’s not rushed.
it’s not fiery or desperate.
it’s patient. reverent. like he’s memorizing the feeling. like he’s been waiting for the right moment and this, finally, is it.
his lips press softly against yours, and your hands lift automatically to his jacket, holding on, grounding yourself.
when you part, he leans his forehead against yours.
you’re both quiet for a moment.
then he says, “i’ve wanted to do that for a long time.”
you smile. “i could tell.”
“was i too obvious?”
“painfully.”
he laughs, arms sliding around your waist like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
“this is still new,” he says. “i know that.”
you nod.
“but i’m willing to take it slow.”
“okay.”
“i’ll be patient.”
“okay.”
he pauses. “and i’d like to take you to dinner. an actual dinner. with reservations and menus and probably overpriced appetizers.”
you grin. “are you asking me on a real date?”
he lifts your hand and presses a kiss to your knuckles.
“yes,” he says. “i’m asking.”
“then yes,” you reply. “i’m saying yes.”
you walk home hand-in-hand.
you don’t have to say anything.
it’s not pretending anymore.
and for once—finally—that feels like enough.
about me .ᐟ
hi hi !! i'm jade ♡
i'm usually found watching anime, listening to music, or getting lost in some game i said i'd only play for 10 minutes.
𖦹 she/her 𖦹 18 𖦹 intp 𖦹 pisces sun, taurus moon, taurus rising
animanga: bnha, one piece, demon slayer, fruits basekt, jjk, kakeguri, death note, another, link click, hxh, hri, cowboy bebop, charlotte, spy x family, a silent voice, assassination classroom, naruto, saiki k, kcc, chainsaw man, given, mdud, tgftos, dandadan, tbhk music: ado, sza, phantom siita, sabrina carpenter, olivia rodrigo, big thief, lizzy mcalpine, julia wolf, pheobe bridgers, beabadoobee, adrianne lenker, aespa, illit, newjeans, twice, lesserafin, blackpink, itzy, kiss of life games: minecraft, fortnite, project sekai, cod, the sims, roblox, pokemon, overwatch, valorant
𖦹 basic dni criteria (racist, homophobic, transphobic, ableist, etc.) 𖦹 proshipper / incest / pedophelia / lolicon or shotacon apologists 𖦹 if you're weird about fictional characters in a gross way 𖦹 if you don't respect my and other people's boundaries 𖦹 nsfw accounts interacting with sfw posts 𖦹 minors can interact unless it's a marked nsfw post
feel free to hang out ♡
Jade in my head we’re besties I love ur smau I can’t imagine how hard they are to make girl
omfg lets be besties pleaseeee
i love makung the smaus i crack myself up icl im so glad other people enjoy them
HII!!!
i loveloveLOVE ur smau’s, could u do one for katsuki bakugo? enemies to lovers ?? the storyline and stuff can be anything u want.
pls feel free to add any details u want 😭😭
and no pressure !!!
you're vice captain to his captain on the soccer team. working together was never the problem. staying out of each other's way was.
but first i gotta get thru this fuck ass shift!!!
i ripped my cart in the bathroom TOO hard and i’m tweaking at work omfg help
gonna get violently high and fulfill requests tonight im so excited
in which your job is to manage keigo takami's modeling career, not his flirtation habit—but unfortunately, he's extremely good at both.
keigo takami (hawks)
user error | smau ⤷ as the ceo of a tech company for pro heroes, you're used to dealing with malfunctions—just not one with wings and a flirting problem signed, sealed, unprofessional | smau ⤷ in which your job is to manage keigo takami's modeling career, not his flirtation habit—but unfortunately, he's extremely good at both alley rose | smau + fic ⤷ you know he's not yours, but you'd still pick him in every lifetime. the worst part? he'd let you.