RIP This Pannel Of Jeremy

I never did finish that animation I was trying to do, but here's a frame of Jean I was really proud of lol.

I am DIGGING through my likes trying to find a post that talked about Jean making sexual innuendos back at the floozies once he gets more comfortable, CONNOT FIND IT!!

Anyway! Pottery class, Jeremy compliments Jeans current work only for Jean to shrugs and say, "Im good with my hands" Jeremy immediately thinks it out of context and short circuits.

I don't know anything about the raven AUs or what the extra content has to say but can you imagine if Jean, Kevin, Neil and Andrew were all at evermore at once, because ive been dwelling on it. It would be endless fights. Fists would fly so often. We'd have the whole kevjean situationship plus the andreil mess that is them. Also, jeaneil would be THE power couple. If they had been partners for years, can you imagine the brutality of their insults, oml. I would never want to piss them off or youd just be thrown through the nine rings of hell that is verbal abuse.

And if Andrew still made the deal for nicky and Aaron (not sure that would work but its something to consider)

Would Aaron and Andrew be partners? How would they handle all their problems if they are stuck together 24/7? Do you think Aaron would still fall in love? Would Andrew take medical classes so Aaron can be a doctor? Do you this Aaron has PTSD, thinking of Talia everytime a beating happens?

Dont even get me started on how it would destroy Nicky. He is not built to handle any of that. Plus what Riko would do to him and Andrew, eventually even to Neil. Riko caught Jean by simple looks and Andrew constantly pointed out "that" look on Neil, they would be fucked.

But it would be so intresting to read.

oh what I would give for Jean to go to another festival, to get to see fireworks again, maybe even play games. For him to try Agua Fresca, a little reassurance from Cat and he might have a sweet beverage he can actually enjoy without stress. I need him to be walking around with a stuffed animal Jeremy won under one arm, while holding a fruit drink with a little umbrella in the other hand, waiting patiently for them to try all the rides (there is no way in hell he is getting in a tiny metal box built in a day to go flying through the air) maybe he would try the bumper cars or do a corn maze. Him watching kids run and laugh, seeing all the lights and fun music, maybe there is even a live band. Jeremy watching him be appalled by the idea of funnel cake (the three of them finish two). Laila convincing him to do face paint, so he has all these intricate swirls on the left side of his face, burying the '3' in a wash of twists and turns of color. Jeremy dragging him to the petting zoo, seeing all these animals he has never been around. Goats, ducks, sheep, and ponies all mingling together. He hates the smell, but there's this little duck that follows him everywhere he goes and he cant help but to feel something. Cat cramming them all into frame for a picture as they are leaving, getting all the rides and lights behind them and maybe he even smiles, just a small, content smile as Jeremy presses their faces together, hugging the girls to them.

Dare I say Andreil

TGR SPOLIERS

Hear me out, Kevin knows Jean loves(loved) him. And I'm kinda convinced he might have loved him back but Kevin "its easier to keep him heterosexual" Day, Kevin "they were supposed to be a warning" Day. He knew what would happen to them if they went down that road, yet he learned how to speak french for him, he bought him magnets and postcards and made him promise to survive for both of their sakes. Kevin who fought for Jean in the only ways he knew he could, who kept in touch with him even after he made it out and knew how badly that would hurt Jean, but he couldn't Let. Him. Go. Kevin knows Jean has always like Jeremy, hes aware that Jean likes men, he has to have seen how Jean looks at him, if Riko and Andrew and Jeremy all knew from moments of being with them, Kevin couldn't have ignored it, not truly. I think Kevin did love him, but was so conditioned to never betray Riko, its still ingrained in him despite everything, that he suppressed it as far as he could to protect them both. Maybe thats part of the reason he gave him to Jeremy, he trusts him, he knows hes been through a lot and is healing from it, but he also knows that Jean already liked him and would eventually cave, at least letting him be his friend, healing the things Kevin is still too scared to confront.

This is exactly what I meant when I said crash out

Let him be violent!! Yes, all of the ideas of doing pottery and biking are amazing, but those are sources of happiness, he still needs a rage outlet. I love the idea of him finding happiness in mundane things and I truly hope we get some of that, but I don't think he is going to be able to heal until he actually feels and processes his anger, because he truly is a raging inferno of hatred, let him burn things so something new can grow in the ashes.

"Jean considered biting the fingers that slipped pills between his lips" tsc p11

"Jean felt the tendrils of an old and ugly rage stir, and he knotted a bruised hand in the sheets like he could somehow hold it at bay through sheer force alone." p22-23

"'If you tell me to follow his lead, I will cut your throat open with my teeth', Jean said." p26

"The urge to tear Nathaniel's face open was so fierce he could barely breathe." p28

"It was the only way this worked: if Jean signed something that said he had to behave to be allowed to stay on the lineup, he could bite his tongue and stay his fists. It'd piss him off beyond the telling, but he could follow orders if it meant surviving another day. Without that black-and-white command his nature would get the better of him sooner or later, and then there'd be no saving him." p65-66

"Finding out he was little more than Riko's dog outside of practices had him lashing out with all the youthful rage he could muster." p79

"He was furious at Abby for implying he'd never tried to fight [...] 'Fuck you,' Jean said quietly, then louder: 'Fuck you.'" p79

"Jean couldn't explain that restless rage" p90

"'Yes,' he said, and if he didn't sound sure, he at least sounded angry. 'Let them all burn. I hope none of them survive.'" p142

"He wanted to throw Jeremy into a wall just to prove he could" p242

"Jean was a starving dog on a short chain who'd learned years ago not to bite back." p252

Spoilers

Her letting Aiden and Taylor braid her hair, and then her reaching out to Aiden when she was scared of what to do (plus him getting upset by flash backs) she really is becoming so much more comfortable and dependent on them 🥲

erm little Ashlyn rant (very big spoilers if ur not caught up with sbg)

I don’t think we talk enough about how much Ashlyn has grown and gotten more comfortable in the group. She was vulnerable before they got the jeep, even if it was just a little bit. And when Aiden died she immediately ran in to hug him. WHAT?! She has explicitly never done that. That’s something she explicitly HATES doing, but she did it with zero hesitation because she cares for him. When they were separated in the hospital for that little bit, when Logan and Ben found her, she ALSO immediately ran to hug them. Zero hesitation. She did the same when they found Taylor. (Not Tyler for obvious reasons and for some reason not Aiden but the thought still counts.)

and later when the group was finally together again after the whole ‘Ashlyn touching a phantom’ thing, Taylor and Aiden were WRAPPED. AROUND. HER. Sure, she told them to get off, but it just didn’t seem like she hated it like she would in the earlier season/episodes.

and earlier, when they just got to the hospital and Alex was questioning Ashlyn, she immediately asked where her friends were. Word for word, she asked “Where are my friends?” HELLO? She’s never called them her friends before. Maybe she didn’t say it to their face, but she still called them her friends. Also the fact that they were immediately her first priority. Not “where am I?” “Where are my parents”, no, she saved that for later. First, she needed to know her friends were safe.

and I would mention the whole Aiden and Ashlyn talk after they get the jeep but that would get me talking for a WHILE, and this is getting long sooo

BUT IT IS SO FUCKING CUTE AND I LOVE HER DEVELOPMENT AND SHE LOVES AND CARES FOR THEM AND SHES SUCH A WELL WRITTEN CHRACTER WAHHHHHH

Take this man to get a tattoo. Take 👏 this👏 man 👏 to 👏 get 👏 a 👏 tattoo!! GAH theres nothing else that can make him reach peak hotness (big messy manbun 👀) like a tattoo can.

No but really, I can see him getting like blackberry flowers or maybe seashells in remembrance of Elodie. Something simple and sweet, very little coloring thats well shaded on his forearm or his bicep. Maybe even putting her name in fancy cursive (if he can bring himself to be so sentimental, I know he struggles to say/hear her name)

As much as I would really like to see him reunited with her (remains)

[ talked about here https://www.tumblr.com/smittenmeraki/778038352449601536/no-because-i-keep-thinking-of-neil-having-his?source=share ],

I dont think that will happen and this is a beautiful way for him to pay tribute and put her to rest.

at some point after tgr, the trojans sit cat down intervention-style

‘cat you CANNOT keep making jean hotter. you taught him how to cook. you taught him how to drive a motorcycle and helped him get his own. you’re getting him to show his soft boy side in public. you helped convince him to be a dog dad cat we CAN’T HANDLE ANY MORE the whole team is obsessed with him and jeremy is DYING can you have some CONSIDERATION cat’

Never lose sight of why you started