Coming From Someone Who's Seen Her In Person With A Short Sleeved Shirt It's True I Couldn't Form An

My therapist asked me to create something “motivating” so I made these.

lol.

when she says she doesn’t send nudes

Reblog to kill it faster

Math teacher explaining why not to use x for times: because if you're using x as a variable you'll get 4xx. 4xx, that's a really big person

~

Friend, talking about the venting machines at the end of the hall in our high school: I don't wanna go down there, the farther you the bigger they get.

~

*science teacher telling us that flying squirrels glow it the dark*

Friend: cool! I have a new night light!

~

Friend 1: you could never lie to me.

Friend 2, lying: I'm gay.

Friend 1: wait really?!

~

Me: it's fine I only see like one error.

Friend, fixing all the errors: you only see one grammarly sees all

~

*a teacher trying to explain who are sub is bc they forgot her name*

Boy in my class: I still thought it was [female teacher we all hate] when you said beard

~

Family friend, in tune of bohemian rhapsody: I'm just a drunk boy, I need my pillow

I'm just gonna make a thread as weird/funny things that my family/friends says/does

5yr old cousin, scoops up sand to throw at her sister trips over the sandbox wall: what the fucking heck

~

Sister, hiccups while taking a drink:

Me and my cousin:did you just hiccup??

Sister: yea

Cousin: that sounded weird

Sister: it felt weird too

~

Friend:I'm a pacifist

Me: I'll pass a fist

~

Cousin, puts a pool noodle between legs: that makes my peepee go weeee *runs and jumps in the pond*

~

*my brother and cousin fighting over whatever we passed*

Cousin: you're not the vision of my eyes!!!

~

Dad: you stupid f- op gotta stop swearin' at my phone

~

Uncle, drunk off his ass and and stumbling around:

Me: where are you going

Uncle: I'm dancing with gravity

~

*aunts wedding where her now husbands family his being all huggy and stuff

Our side of the family greeting each other by punching or waving*

~

I'll add more

me

“Those poor boys”

“She deserves to be punished too.”

“I’m not saying I support rape, but-”

“Sorry to say - she deserved it.”

“She put herself in harm’s way”

“But if she was fingered, then that’s not rape.”

“She ruined their lives.”

I'm just gonna make a thread as weird/funny things that my family/friends says/does

5yr old cousin, scoops up sand to throw at her sister trips over the sandbox wall: what the fucking heck

~

Sister, hiccups while taking a drink:

Me and my cousin:did you just hiccup??

Sister: yea

Cousin: that sounded weird

Sister: it felt weird too

~

Friend:I'm a pacifist

Me: I'll pass a fist

~

Cousin, puts a pool noodle between legs: that makes my peepee go weeee *runs and jumps in the pond*

~

*my brother and cousin fighting over whatever we passed*

Cousin: you're not the vision of my eyes!!!

~

Dad: you stupid f- op gotta stop swearin' at my phone

~

Uncle, drunk off his ass and and stumbling around:

Me: where are you going

Uncle: I'm dancing with gravity

~

*aunts wedding where her now husbands family his being all huggy and stuff

Our side of the family greeting each other by punching or waving*

~

I'll add more

Hands up if you’re still mad that Christianity took over most of the world, displacing the ancient local religions and destroying records of them so we’ll never know the details about them

"GO AWAY!"

"Go AwAy?"

Reblog with an inside joke you have with your friends.

“Yes, Captain America has LEGS!”