I Literally Cant Fucking Breathe 

so when food is too salty we might say "打死卖盐的" basically meaning "did you beat the salt merchant to death" but one time in an attempt to be a little polite and a little funny to the chef (my mother) i said "……是不是又跟卖盐的有矛盾了" meaning "are you... having a dispute with the salt merchant again" and now it's a whole thing in my family

anyway point being there has been another altercation with the salt merchant

An asexual and pansexual become room-mates and have wacky adventures

The show is called ‘All or Nothing’

official elon musk hate post reblog to hate like to hate reply to hate

I have used all of my ability as a director to expertly give myself 12 hours worth of extra work because I forgot to paint my actor's wrists.

You turn on the radio one morning to find another one of those Rap songs where every 4th word is a swear. Naturally the Radio bleeps it out, but you realize that it sounds familiar. You realize that the rappers are speaking in Morse code.

THESE PLACES USED TO SEEM SO FAMILIAR; NOW I LOOK FOR YOU IN THE DARK

LETS BRING BACK 1337 SPEAK 

D&D horror stories where the source of the problem is genuinely a failure to understand the rules, now there's an amazing subgenre. "Casters are so weak compared to martials, how do I keep up?" "What do you mean?" "I ran out of spell slots several weeks of in-game time ago, we're using healing potions to restore HP since it's more efficient than sleeping."