1.) Consider The Attitude And Characteristics Of Your Character

How to Write Strong Dialogue

(from a writer of ten years)

So you’re back in the writing trenches. You’re staring at your computer, or your phone, or your tablet, or your journal, and trying not to lose your mind. Because what comes after the first quotation mark? Nothing feels good.

Don’t worry, friend. I’m your friendly tumblr writing guide and I’m here to help you climb out of the pit of writing despair.

I’ve created a character specifically for this exercise. His name is Amos Alejandro III, but for now we’ll just call him Amos. He’s a thirty-something construction worker with a cat who hates him, and he’s just found out he has to go on a quest across the world to save his mother’s diner.

1.) Consider the Attitude and Characteristics of Your Character

One of the biggest struggles writers face when writing dialogue is keeping characters’ dialogue “in-character”.

You’re probably thinking, “but Sparrow, I’m the creator! None of the dialogue I write can be out of character because they’re my original characters!”

WRONG. (I’m hitting the very loud ‘incorrect’ buzzer in your head right now).

Yes, you created your characters. But you created them with specific characteristics and attitudes. For example, Amos lives alone, doesn’t enjoy talking too much, and isn’t a very scholarly person. So he’s probably not going to say something like “I suggest that we pursue the path of least resistance for this upcoming quest.” He’d most likely say, “I mean, I think the easiest route is pretty self-explanatory.”

Another example is a six-year-old girl saying, “Hi, Mr. Ice Cream Man, do you have chocolate sundaes?” instead of “Hewwo, Ice Cweam Man— Chocowate Sundaes?”

Please don’t put ‘w’s in the middle of your dialogue unless you have a very good and very specific reason. I will cry.

Yes, the girl is young, but she’s not going to talk like that. Most children know how to ask questions correctly, and the ‘w’ sound, while sometimes found in a young child’s speech, does not need to be written out. Children are human.

So, consider the attitude, characteristics, and age of your character when writing dialogue!

2.) Break Up Dialogue Length

If I’m reading a novel and I see an entire page of dialogue without any breaks, I’m sobbing. You’re not a 17th century author with endless punctuation. You’re in the 21st century and people don’t read in the same way they used to.

Break up your dialogue. Use long sentences. Use one word. Use commas, use paragraph breaks. Show a character throwing a chair out a window in between sentences.

For example:

“So, you’re telling me the only way to save my Ma’s diner is to travel across five different continents, find the only remaining secret receipt card, and bring it back before she goes out of business? She didn’t have any other copies? Do I have to leave my cat behind?”

vs.

Amos ran a hand over his face. “So, you’re telling me the only way to save my Ma’s diner is to travel across five different continents, find the only remaining secret recipe card, and bring it back before she goes out of business?”

He couldn’t believe his luck. That was sarcastic, of course. This was ironically horrible.

“She didn’t have any other copies?” He leaned forward over the table and frowned. “Do I have to leave my cat behind?”

The second version is easier to digest, and I got to add some fun description of thought and action into the scene! Readers get a taste of Amos’ character in the second scene, whereas in the first scene they only got what felt like a million words of dialogue.

3.) Don’t Overuse Dialogue Tags.

DON’T OVERUSE DIALOGUE TAGS. DON’T. DON’T DON’T DON’T.

If you don’t know what a dialogue tag is, it’s a word after a sentence of dialogue that attributes that dialogue to a specific character.

For example:

“Orange juice and chicken ramen are good,” he said.

‘Said’ functions as the dialogue tag in this sentence.

Dialogue tags are good. You don’t want to completely avoid them. (I used to pride myself on how I could write stories without any dialogue tags. Don’t do that.) Readers need to know who’s speaking. But overusing them, or overusing weird or unique tags, should be avoided.

Examples:

“I’m gonna have to close my diner,” Amos’ mother said.

“Why?” Amos growled. “It’s been in the family forever.”

“I’ve lost the secret recipe card, and I can’t keep the diner open without it!” she cried.

“The Bacon Burger Extreme recipe card?” Amos questioned.

“Yes!” Amos’ mother screamed.

“Well, that’s not good,” Amos complained.

vs.

“I’m gonna have to close my diner,” Amos’ mother said, taking her son’s hand and leading him over to one of the old, grease-stained tabletops with the ripped-fabric booths.

Amos simply stared at her as they moved. “Why? It’s been in the family forever.”

“I’ve—” she looked away for a moment, then took in a breath. “I’ve lost the secret recipe card. And I can’t keep the diner open without it.”

“The Bacon Burger Extreme recipe card?”

“Yes!” She still wouldn’t meet his eyes, and her shoulders were shaking. “Yes.”

Amos sat down heavily in the booth. “Well, that’s not good.”

The first scene only gives character names and dialogue tags. There are no actions and no descriptions. The second scene, however, gives these things. It gives the reader descriptions of the diner, the characters’ actions, and attitudes. Overusing dialogue tags gets boring fast, so add interest into your writing!

So! When you’re writing, consider the attitude of your character, vary dialogue length, and don’t overuse dialogue tags.

Now climb out of the pit of writing despair. Pick up your pen or computer. And write some good dialogue!

Best,

Sparrow

More Posts from Sleepdeprivedskelton and Others

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Free office suite – the evolution of OpenOffice. Compatible with Microsoft .doc, .docx, .xls, .xlsx, .ppt, .pptx. Updated regularly, communi

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11 months ago

The fundamentals of Magic

I finally got around to writing a guideline for my magic system. As this was for my own use, i didn't put much effort into formatting or story-writing, but i thought i would share regardless.

General Concept:

Magic exists as an energy found in the "Third Realm," a shadow-like domain composed entirely of magical energy.

The First Realm is the physical world, and the Second Realm is the immaterial realm of the gods. The Third Realm is a non-physical shadow of the physical world composed entirely of magical energy.

All living creatures in the First Realm have a faint connection to the Third Realm, naturally drawing a small amount of magic into the physical world.

The "gods" of the second realm exist by the energy of the third realm, but exist as a sort of undefined halfway point between the first and third realms. Their domains are composed of magic with the illusion of physicality. The existence of the dead in this realm pose major questions on the nature of the soul that I honestly don't feel like trying to explain.

more on this later i think.

See [[Realms]]

Mechanics:

Larger creatures can channel more magic due to their greater connection to the Third Realm.

This is tied to a creature's volume, but has a small effect. Humans and Dragons have far more magic than one might expect from their size.

Dragons are something of a special case that will be expanded on later.

A large and small human will have a negligible difference in access to magic.

A ant will have less access to magic than a deer. etc.

Animals generally have far less accessible magic than sentient races, but special cases have been known to surface.

plants have almost no perceivable magic, this is thought to be a result of not having a soul or blood.

Magic in living beings is more stable and "pure" compared to the chaotic energy found directly in the Third Realm. Magic is "filtered" when it is pulled between realms by a living force, although the mechanism behind this is not understood.

Using magic depends greatly on what medium is used to control it.

Ember magic must be used by channeling magic from the Third Realm into the physical world without drawing it into one's own body, otherwise you risk mana sickness.

Dragon Magic uses dragon bone as either an amplifier or a battery for magic, allowing one to slowly accumulate large stores of magic which can be unleashed without loss.

"natural" magic is magic drawn directly from the user's body. This method must be used as a sort of signal current to activate and use other types of magic. It is the most widespread form, and also the weakest on its own, as humans have a very limited amount of natural magic at any given time. Think of it like blood, when you run low, you make more. You can't lose very much without feeling some serious effects.

When using Ember magic, natural magic is channeled from the user to maintain the connection to the third realm, and to direct the flow of the raw or chaotic third realm magic. This imposes a hard limit on how long an Embermancer can operate.

In draconic casting, raw magic is used to "break the seal" an unleash what is stored, but is otherwise preserved, making this an extremely efficient way to use large amounts of magic.

When casting without a medium, magic may flow from any part of the body, but most commonly the hands. Running low on internal magic will cause exhaustion and may bring similar symptoms to complete bodily exhaustion such as hallucinations, unconsciousness and cardiac arrest. If you run completely out of internal magic, you will die, although most will fall unconscious before this point, similar to how you will pass out and begin to breathe again if you hold your breath too long. If magic is being continually drawn from you, by a formulated spell or Ember channeling, for example, your body will rapidly breakdown to generate the deficit energy drawn from you. This is known as "Burnout".

Special Materials:

Dragon bone is prized for its ability to hold and amplify magic, allowing spellcasters to channel larger spells.

Ember acts as a conduit for magic. It allows magicians to draw vast amounts of energy from the Third Realm with minimal personal expenditure, but with significant risks. When in use, Ember generates a significant amount of heat. Ember takes the form of a black, basalt-like material interspersed with brilliant orange luminous crystals. The crystal formations are the actual Ember, with the black material being similar to a dross.

Ember prisms, cut from higher-grade Ember, are coveted for their increased effectiveness and reduced heat buildup. However, overheated Ember prisms can be extremely dangerous to the user. Despite their name, Prisms are not a specific shape. Ember is often found in pentagonal prism form in small samples, but very large masses can have a wide range of crystal forms. Ember can be cut to any shape. It is traditionally cut to 2-6" rods and used in a similar fashion to a wand. They are often shaped to maximize skin contact to reduce the effects of Ember-burn.

Overheated Prisms can cause serious burns, and have a chance to explode when overheated. Larger masses have the potential to run away while under heavy use, creating a huge spike in heat as the Ember begins drawing magic by it's own power. This almost always leads to the violent destruction of of the prism and the surrounding area. The only way to stop a runaway reaction is to quickly cool the mass below the critical threshold.

Runaway spells are not true spells. The original spell usually falls apart near instantly as the stone switches from a controlled stream of magic into an overflow of raw energy. This uncontrolled flood of energy usually ignites anything nearby within seconds. See [[The Helebrost Incident]].

Risks and Side Effects:

Drawing raw magic from the Third Realm into one's body, rather than expelling it directly into the world can cause "mana sickness," which manifests as nausea, muscle cramps, seizures, coma, spontaneous bleeding, and even death if overexposed. the condition generally lasts about 24 hours, while your body quickly attempts to prevent breakdown from the influx of chaotic magic.

"Burnout" occurs when a magician's body is destroyed by excess "dirty" magic drawn directly from the Third Realm, or is reduced directly into energy while overcasting, leading to violent immolation or explosion.

Ember-Specific Risks:

Prolonged use of Ember can cause mundane heat burns, and "Ember-burn"; a mostly harmless condition where the stone seeps into the user's skin, causing dark scars, patterns, itching, occasional numbness, and other irritating effects. In very extreme cases, Ember will begin to crystalize directly on, in, or even under the user's skin, sometimes causing frostbite-like damage and intense pain.

Magicians using Ember typically channel magic directly through it into the world, avoiding the chaotic energy's harmful effects on their bodies. See "Burnout"

Historical Context -- to be expanded

Horus Tobb discovered Ember magic but died from burnout while demonstrating its use to the Magician's guild in Tarbrind. This tragedy led to a global increase in interest for magical research.

The rediscovery of Magnus Helderon's Divine Theory provided a deeper understanding of the nature and mechanics of magic. See [[Magic and the Second Realm - Ember and Bone]]

The Helebrost Incident - the first recoded runaway of an Ember Prism. A 33" diameter Ember Sphere used for conducting research at the Helebrost University entered a meltdown state after a research team attempted to transmute a mass of pig iron directly into gold. The resulting inferno burned down nearly 3.5 square miles (9 square km) of the the surrounding city in a blaze which lasted nearly a week.


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Magic and the Second Realm (Part 1)

The following document is transcribed from the heavily damaged original printing of Divine Theory, etc., By Magnus Helderon, Pioneer of magical research. This is the translated and abridged introductory section, for the magic lithograph, and unabridged text, refer to the branch headmaster of the Tarbrind Royal Library, Historical Division.

Introduction to the Text Magnus Helderon is a difficult to track figure. No one knows when or where he was born, or when he died. Only a single small portrait of him was made during his brief visit to Tarbrind. His grave is located in the royal crypts, after his exhumation from an obscure village in western Dragonspine area in 1368.

Magnus, a "folk wizard" hailing from the relatively unsettled southeastern region, was, by most accounts an "esoteric madman" who practiced some slight degree of what is commonly referred to as folk magic. He was reportedly taught by his grandmother to cure warts and witch for water and rain, among other things. He is believed to be the first person to discover the utility of the "Ember" found scattered across the world after the great cataclysm in 1253. Rather than share his findings, he delved into hermitage and studied the phenomenon ceaselessly. Despite having almost no formal teaching, He produced a 1758 page codex known as the Divine Theory, Of Magics, Embers, and Dragon-bone. It was written entirely in the Oldspeake, and was nearly unintelligible in handwriting. He personally delivered the book to the miniscule magician's guild of Tarbrind, only six months after the conclusion of the great famine, where it sat in storage for nearly a decade, completely unread.

The tome was recovered while the guild was preparing to relocate, its numbers bolstered by the recent emergence of ember magics following the incineration of Horus Tob some 18 months prior. By this time, the book was heavily water damaged. It rested in the hands of the Scribe's guild for nearly 3 years before the readable portions were translated and compiled into the Theory of Magics, a textbook used in teaching the fundamentals of magic to this day. (approx. 150 years later)

The first section, and final third of the book, some 700 pages total, were completely beyond recovery for several more years, before more advanced recovery techniques were developed. While some sections remain lost to history, What was recovered changed the fundamentals of magic forever.

Here is an audio transcript made with ElevenLabs. AI was NOT used to write this document.


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8 months ago

Celethon the Ancient

Note recovered from the Library of Tarbrind, following the disappearance of it's author, John Heldefson, Field Scholar.

A great dragon of the ancient world, Celethon has evaded discovery for many decades. Once a close friend of the Tarbrind King, he went into seclusion after the Great Slaughter. Although the details of his current status remain uncertain, I believe that if Celethon were dead, the consequences would be felt across world. According to historical records, Celethon is approximately 750 years old, one of the most powerful and revered of the True Dragons. He holds a unique position of authority among his kin, serving as the closest thing they have to a leader. Before the Great Slaughter, Celethon was instrumental in founding an elite order known as the Dragon Knights, or Dragoons, under the Tarbrind monarchy. The Dragoons bore Celethon's blessing and symbol, acting as an elite force of warriors and diplomats between dragons and humans, and acted as the hand of Celethon wherever he could not reach himself. They represented the alliance of human and dragon-kind. Nearly all of them perished in the Slaughter, and with Celethon's disappearance, the order collapsed. The survivors reformed as the Firewatch, who to this day carry Celethon's symbol, though they now defend against other threats. Despite his rather pervasive role in history, especially up until 150 years ago, mentions of Celethon, especially physical descriptions are surprisingly sparse, and in some texts, even seemingly censored. I am looking into the matter with the help of the Library of Tarbrind, though I believe there is another who may offer some insight. Either way, Celethon was described as a truly massive dragon, nearly 600 feet in length. His scales were purest black, each one coarse and leaf-shaped, measuring about the length of a grown man's arm. His breath, said to be the hottest fire in all the realms, was used to smelt the impervious metal wolfram, discovered by the Church of the Raven within a fallen star. In personality, Celethon was calm, wise, and deliberate. He was slow to anger, but in battle, he was a force of unparalleled power, capable of rending enemies apart with ease. His might was displayed when he single-handedly slew the dragon Celic the Black, who had razed the city of Oscillia, ripping the rebel dragon in half over the burning city. Hope remains that this titan of the ancient world will one day surface again. Searches have been conducted for decades, although they have become far less frequent due to the lack of results. Personally, I believe he still watches from the shadows, protecting the lands he once called his own.


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10 months ago

I was worldbuilding two bog standard fantasy species, wise old tree dudes and impulsive little rat guys, when I realized it was far funnier if they had each other's personalities.

The rat guys think fast and talk fast, but they're incredibly conservative and like to cover all the angles before they take any action. This comes with being a prey species: their ancestral environment had lots of clever traps and devious hazards, so you get rat councils wisely working the problem.

The tree dudes speak and move slowly, but they will propose and then do the most insane things you can imagine. They can slot together a rocket in an afternoon and will then use it without so much as a test fire first. They test new potions by quaffing them down, sometimes not even waiting for it to cool (though they're tree dudes, so I guess quaffing a potion just means pouring it over their root legs). This comes from the ancestral selection process too: the tree dudes that won were the ones that took big risks, that grew faster, stronger, and tried new things without worrying about consequences. The tree dudes evolved in an era when they had no natural predators and their only competition was each other.

And this is, of course, initially confusing for any human who makes contact with them. If a giant bearded tree nods at you solemnly and tells you to go through a portal, your first thought is not that he's curious about what will happen to spacetime. And if a hyperactive little rat guy tells you with some urgency that you must accompany him into a ruined city, you won't immediately think that this is step 11 of his branching 27 step plan.

11 months ago

NEED HELP WRITING? (a masterlist)

I have likely not added many that I've reblogged to this list. Please feel free to roam my blog and/or ask/message me to add something you'd like to see on this list!

Synonym Lists

Look by @writers-potion

Descriptors

Voices by @saraswritingtipps

Show, Don't Tell by @lyralit

Tips & Tricks

5 Tips for Creating Intimidating Antagonists by @writingwithfolklore

How To (Realistically) Make a Habit of Writing by @byoldervine

Let's Talk About Misdirection by @deception-united

Tips to Improve Character Voice by @tanaor

Stephen King's Top 20 Rules for Writers posted by @toocoolformedschool

Fun Things to Add to a Fight Scene (Hand to Hand Edition) by @illarian-rambling

Questions I Ask My Beta Readers by @burntoutdaydreamer

Skip Google for Research by @s-n-arly

Breaking Writing Rules Right: Don't Write Direct Dialogue by @septemberercfawkes

Databases/Resources

International Clothing

Advice/Uplifting

Too Ashamed of Writing To Write by @writingquestionsanswered

"Said" is Beautiful by @blue-eyed-author

8 months ago
sleepdeprivedskelton - The Palace of ADHD

burning text gif maker

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minecraft logo font text generator w/assorted textures and pride flags

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FromSoftware image macro generator (elden ring Noun Verbed text)

image to 3d effect gif

vaporwave image generator

microsoft wordart maker (REALLY annoying to use on mobile)

you're welcome

7 months ago

When people say, “nature is my religion” are they talking about flies that feed on shit, maggots in decomposing corpses, lionesses with stained teeth and mouths full of blood? Are they talking about floods and fires and things from which we should always run? Are they talking about carcasses, rot, death?

Or do they just mean “this particular copse of benign trees is my religion”


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sleepdeprivedskelton - The Palace of ADHD
The Palace of ADHD

World building fiction writer, He/Him or Skele/ton.Ask me anything :)Praise the worms that break the clay,Where maggots dance and life decay For corpse lays down, and death takes hold, And in the rot, life new unfolds.

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