Undeniable Proof That Aziraphale Is That Bitch™

Undeniable Proof that Aziraphale is That Bitch™

Over the last couple of nights, I’ve been skimming my copy of Good Omens again, because so many people in the comments of my other post were somehow surprised by the suggestion that Aziraphale might be a garbage angel. But like… He is. He really is.

So here, an itemized list of Aziraphale being absolutely Extra (capital E) with evidence:

1) That time he chose his CD player over Heaven.

“That’s it, then,” said Crowley, with a gleam of triumph. He knew Aziraphale’s weak spot all right. “No more compact discs.”

2) That time he lit a traffic cop’s ticket book on fire because he didn’t want to pay a fine.

As they drove past an astonished traffic warden his notebook spontaneously combusted, to Crowley’s amazement.

“I’m pretty certain I didn’t mean to do that,” he said.

Aziraphale blushed. “That was me.”

3) That time he collected Bibles, but all of them were evil.

And he had a complete set of the Infamous Bibles… These Bibles included the Unrighteous Bible… the Wicked Bible… the Discharge Bible… the Buggre Alle This Bible…

4) That time even the apocalypse couldn’t dent his manicure or his obsession with occult prophecies.

No one knows what happened to the legions of unsold copies of Agnes Nutter’s book. Certainly none remain in any museums or private collections. Even Aziraphale does not possess a copy, but would go weak in the knees a the thought of actually getting his exquisitely manicured hands on one.

5) That time he may or may not have done… something ominous to the mafia.

Or sometimes, while they were talking, other men in dark glasses would wander around the shop shaking their heads and saying how inflammable paper was, and what a firetrap he had here.

Aziraphale would nod and smile and say that he’d think about it. And they’d go away. And they’d never come back.

Just because you’re an angel doesn’t mean you have to be a fool.

6) That time he was just an absolute mannerless heathen.

“You said it was him!” moaned Aziraphale, abstractedly picking the final lump of cream cake from his lapel. He licked his fingers clean.

7) That time that he actually considered moving to Hell with Crowley.

“I suppose–get off the road you clown–” Crowley said, “your people wouldn’t consider–and the scooter you rode in on!–giving me asylum?”

“I was going to ask you the same thing.”

8) The raw confidence it took to deliver THIS:

“Some Southern pansy,” Shadwell said, “I heard him. He was in here, suggestin’ things to yer. I heard him.”

Madame Tracy’s mouth opened, and a voice said, “Not just A Southern Pansy, Sergeant Shadwell. THE Southern Pansy.”

9) That time the line “You go too fast for me Crowley” was amusing to any book reader who remembers book!Aziraphale beating Crowley’s top speed by over 90mph while driving a scooter:

Look at Crowley, doing 110mph on the M40… …This was exactly like that, except that instead of a gleaming twelve-mile-long spaceship, it was an off-white twenty-year-old motor scooter. And it probably wasn’t going at more than two hundred miles per hour.

10) That time his sass game was so strong even Crowley had no answer.

“We seem to have survived,” Aziraphale said. “Just imagine how terrible it might have been if we’d been at all competent.”

“Um,” said Crowley.

And this isn’t even mentioning the time he left a loaded gun in the hands of a sugar-high 11-year-old, was the only main character responsible for actually killing an animal, dropped the book’s one (1) F-bomb, manipulated a human into agreeing to murder a child, performed what looked exactly like a demon summoning ritual, lied to God, and broke the first commandment…

TL;DR: Aziraphale is a L E G E N D and Crowley legitimately wishes he could be this cool.

HTTYD 3 Theory

OK HEAR ME OUT:

We all know the Light Fury is a potential mate for Toothless and all the 'Hiccup-teaches-Toothless-to-flirt' thing will happen, but what he doesn't have to because of Grimdel.

Maybe he force the Light Fury to lure Toothless away from Hiccup. He did this so he can repopulate the species but have them to himself, to have an army of Night and Light Furies attack on his command.

And that's when Hiccup and the gang comes in, we still have those Hiccstrid moments and other ones, they will help Toothless AND the Light Fury out of Grimdel grasp.

EPIC BATTLE SCENES

And the final part is when Toothless make his decision if he wants to stay with Hiccup or with Light. And he did make his decision, by convincing the Light Fury to stat with them. If she agreed that's a win win; If not... then... booo😂😂 BUT THAT'S JUST A THEORY...

A FILM THEORY

Oh and maybe there will be a wedding or proposal of Hiccstrid, I hope...

Tags

theory toothless thoughts fishlegs snotlout hiccup astrid httyd3

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sixerella

5 years ago

GOOD OMENS + Tumblr Year in Review 2019

Good Omens is, at its heart, a cosmic gay rom-com, with bad-boy Crowley tempting Aziraphale to get out of his comfort zone and enjoy life, while Aziraphale simultaneously lures him into being a better, less selfish person.

The duo haltingly come together, fall apart under the strain of the events around them and their conflicting moralities, and inevitably come together again to save the day and each other. The rifts in their relationship are felt far more keenly than any instance of demonic mass murder. Their story is so bright and captivating that it’s well worth watching, even if it makes the rest of the show pale by comparison. — Samantha Nelson, The Verge

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sixerella

5 years ago

All right so David Tennant and especially Michael Sheen do a dynamite job of acting as each other's characters, but seriously Miranda Richardson deserves just as much love and credit. She jumps from Madame Tracy to Aziraphale and back in seconds, her whole body language shifts, she moves differently for them both, she flails her hands as Aziraphale, she goes utterly terrifyingly batshit while possessed as an angry ghost, she nails it. It's all a phenomenal bit of frikking acting that deserves way more adoration and attention than it gets.

Tell me that's not Aziraphale all over, to say nothing of the bit afterwards where she clutches at herself and frets about where the soldier might have been sent. Excellent.

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sixerella

5 years ago

Hiccup: Where’s Snotlout?

Tuffnut: Doing stuff.

Hiccup: I don’t like the sound of that. Where’s Astrid?

Tuffnut: Trying to stop Snotlout from doing the stuff.

Hiccup: And Ruffnut?

Tuffnut: Trying to stop Astrid from stopping Snotlout from doing the stuff.

Hiccup: I see. And what are you doing here then?

Tuffnut: I’m supposed to stop you from stopping Ruffnut from stopping Astrid from stopping Snotlout from doing the stuff.

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sixerella

7 years ago

REBLOG!!!!

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sixerella

5 years ago

I swear if Jon didn't send this to Michael and post it, I'm gonna riot

I don’t see this image posted enough.

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sixerella

5 years ago

I ACCEPT!!!!!

Imagine an AU where:

It’s post-Armawasn’t, Crowley and Aziraphale are bopping around London when they both suddenly feel a surge of demonic and angelic energy. For a few minutes they’re legit fearing for their lives until they round a corner to find Gabriel and Beelzebub messily* sucking face

*They haven’t quite figured out how everything works with these squishy bodies yet

Cue absolute rage on Crowley’s part. Armageddon aside, everyone knows damn well they were targeted for being friends and now here their bosses are, climbing each other like forbidden apple trees and moaning loud enough to scare off alley cats. They tried to burn Aziraphale and now here they are acting like a couple of love-sick mortal teens? The absolute HYPOCRISY

Crowley’s about to go in swinging with a bat he conjured up when Aziraphale beats him to it. He calmly—but with an air that makes both lord and archangel still—approaches and announces that yes, they saw them. Yes, Aziraphale has photographic proof (he shakes the ancient Nokia that he’d used slyly on the fly and Crowley is suitably impressed). From here on out if you ever approach us with anything other than an apology we will send these to both God and Satan themselves

Zira-Just-Enough-Of-A-Bastard-To-Be-Worth-Knowing-Fell just accomplished his first blackmail and Crowley has never been more turned on in his life

Keep reading

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