Shutter-bugger - Photography

heartache and hellscape

You’re sharp edges and razor-smiles and jacket patches and stereos. You don’t care about the damage you cause because you refuse to believe that you’re destroying yourself. You don’t care as long as you make sure that you’re in some way making sure that someone else gets something better out of it. You hate the government and you hate everything you’ve ever been told in school, and you like the graffiti in bathrooms but you’re too afraid to add any yourself. You think there’s nothing about you that’s memorable and that’s not true, but you have an odd, fluctuating relationship with how you view yourself. Sometimes you completely devolve into reading 100,000 words in a nighit and destroying your sleep schedule because you think the bags under your eyes are cool and there’s nothing about you that you think people will notice. You don’t like talking to the cashier at the grocery store and you think McDonald’s fries are way better than Burger King’s. You have an odd relationship with everything you read because you don’t want to do two hours of research but you don’t like to take things for surface value. You’re watching the world crumble and you have no one to hold and it hurts so much that you want to burn it all down yourself. You watch too many nature documentaries and like vampires more than werewolves but hate bringing up how much you know about lore. You read the Percy Jackson series when you were a pre-teen and now it comes up every so often like a ghost from the past. You never watch new shows and you hate using other streaming services because you’re so used to Netflix’s layout. The fridge is always half empty and you’re numb to your parents arguing. You’re numb to the world in the same way an Instagram photo has heart filters. I mean…ouch. But they’re not wrong

your vibes, what are they?

Y’all wanna know something kinda crazy that people tend to make fun of me for thinking?

Several years ago I was on a late night flight to Florida with my parents, and I decided to make a wish for 11:11. But just as I was about to make my wish I had an intrusive thought, and instead of making a wish that I actually wanted my brain instead thought “I wish the plane crashes!”

Now I’ve never fully believed in 11:11 wishes but I’ve always done them anyways for fun, but I still panicked because what if it came true for once?!?! So I quickly said to the universe (? idk) “no! I don’t actually want this plane to crash! I didn’t mean it!” And then I thought to myself “great, now a plane will crash.”

Thankfully nothing happened and we got to Florida safely.

Now, it’s the next night and we get back to our hotel room and my parents decide to turn on the news.

Imagine my shock and horror to see that a plane had crashed the day after we landed.

I, remembering the thoughts that were in my head the previous night, couldn’t help but think that I had somehow caused the crash because of my accidental wish. Like I wholeheartedly believed that I had accidentally killed people. And I fully believed that for a few years.

Now not really, but sometimes I have to stop and think about how fucked up of a coincidence that was.

I think I have a new favourite tree 🌸

(Yes I know it’s a magnolia tree don’t worry about the emoji)

(Click for better quality)

hey do you have a tumblr

no sorry

Farewell online privacy

Publisher unknown, United States, [early 2000’s].

I took a lot of pictures at camp.

a brilliant jewel as day slips into darkness venus sparkles still