I Haven’t Listened To Neoni Since MARCH. HOW?!

People like my fuckin alien shit

So here. Have a list of all my characters.

Karen: Ship's mechanic. Human (American-Indian). Fun, snarky, mom vibes, dabbles in illegal drug dealing. She/Her, heterosexual. Has a brown bob with a side undercut, blue eyes, and dark tanned skin, lots of tattoos (including Rainbow Dash). She's like 36.

Steve: Comms Expert. Human (Korean-Japanese). Chill, easygoing, likes video games and Cinnamon Toast Crunch, can and will beat your ass at fortnite. He/Him, gay. Has short black hair, dark brown eyes, pale skin, and a few piercings. He's in his early twenties.

Moss: Translator. Human (Hispanic). Chaotic, sarcastic, an absolute gremlin, has a pet ratbird (keeps trying to domesticate the entire ratbird infestation that lives in the pipes). They/It, pansexual polyamorous. Has curly, bright green/pink hair, blue eyes, and slightly tanned skin. They're twenty-nine.

Zzgnaru. Ship's Captain. Alien (Nobletsk). Tired parent vibes, serious, literal, bad at nuance, loves plushies. Xey/xem, aroace. Brown/black scales, 6 yellow eyes, white horns, spiky tail, pink claws. Xey're 52.

Amethyst: Navigator. Alien (Penaconian). Sweet, happy, literally a ball of sunshine, everyone's sweetheart cutie who also has anxiety. Obsessed with anime (Moss showed him JJK and AoT, and now he's into KnY, MHA, and, like, Helluva Boss.) He/they, demiromantic bisexual. Short blonde hair with purple highlights, hazel eyes, pale skin. He's 32.

Banana: First Mate. Alien (Zzbrk). Comedic, silly, madly in love with Moss (BUT IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET), completely unserious like Captain Jack Sparrow unserious. She/fae, poly, omnisexual. Yellow/brown scales, vitiligo skin, golden eyes, shaved head, white spikes. She's 43.

Douri: Weapons Operater #1. Alien (Aaki). Depressed as shit, loose cannon-type shit, can and will eat your tacos. It/Its, asexual panromantic. Basically just a humanoid blob of orange slime. No one knows its age.

Josh: 2nd Mate. Human (American). Kind of a psycho, hilarious, autistic, likes sharks. And things that look like sharks. Steve’s boyfriend. He/Him, bisexual. Black dreadlocks, umber skin, dark eyes. He's also in his twenties.

Rhïianae: Weapons operator #2. Alien (Jawa). Collects random shit and makes guns out of them. Has severe adhd. Can never finish a project (took apart a secondary engine about a year ago and it's still disassembled). ??? skin, orange eyes, ??? Hair. Fae/Faun/It, demisexual polyamorous. Faun's in its mid-thirties.

Calixtian: Ship's Doctor. Alien (Penaconian). Likes doing experiments on beings of lesser sentience (or heck, same level-sentience, he doesn't care), mad scientist-esque, no one likes him. Blue-green hair, orange eyes, vitiligo skin. He/Him, aromantic. He's 46.

Nøræxx: Interplanetary criminal. Alien (Asgardian). Wanted for weapons smuggling and illegal mercenary work. Is the cavalry reserved for when Douri and Rhïinae are out, is the bodyguard. Dark hair, green eyes, tanned skin. She/He/They, cupioromantic asexual. 500+ years old.

Bastier. Comms student. Human (British). Clueless, cute, easily confused, has OCD, likes cats. Speaks 8 interplanetary languages (not including Earth languages, which he speaks at least twenty of). Blonde hair, pale skin, blue eyes. He/Him, heterosexual (bicurious). 19 years old.

The Ship. "Steroid Annihilator". Modified Class 8 Torigrian K-Wing Destroyer. Got its name when Zzgnaru, Karen, Douri, and Steve successfully piloted it through the Inter-Galaxian Asteroid Fields. Zzgnaru wanted to name it Ssjuokimbl (Conqueror of Rocks), but Steve suggested Asteroid Annihilator instead, and when they got it painted on the side, the artist doing the paint job spelled it wrong. Karen couldn't stop laughing for days.

Note: Steve is a Chill Gay™️, and Josh is a Chaotic Gay™️.

I don’t need to say anything this is just how it is

Just an experiment. Reblog if you actually give a fuck about male victims of domestic violence and rape.

Of fucking course

What sick bastard doesn’t

I'm A Weird Little Shit, Everyone.

Here is a list of my favorite ships. From ALL of the fandoms I'm in.

Genshin Impact

Albecrose

Kaeluc

Fischnett

Aeven

Zhongxiao (OTP)

Qingyun

Ninggbeidou

Kazuscara

Ittosara

Yaei

Ayathoma

Lumiyaka

Kavetham

Sethoscara (yes, I multiship)

Cynari

Clorinavia

Wriolette

Lionfish

Stardew Valley

Sebigail

Sebsam

Halex

My Hero Academia

Todosero

Katsudeku

Shinkami

Dabihawks

Togachako

Kamijiro

Tsukoyami

Miritama (OTP)

Kirimina

Erasermic

Nejiyuyu

Legend of Zelda

Sidlink (OTPPPP)

RevUrbosa (LEAVE ME ALONE THEY’RE PERFECT FOR EACHOTHER)

fuck idk I just like sidlink

I have no idea what fandoms I’m in at this point. A few random ships that I like: Stucky, KeefTam (Teefe?), Gojeto? Getojo? (idk the fuckin ship name), Ratiorine, Bootgenti/Argenthill, Mozeqiu or Feiqiu, idk. Also MioShun bc harukaze no étranger is OTP forever.

this has been my ted talk.

*squirms*

I am snek

I am smol snek

Not snak

Snek

Not for the eatings

Hello little snake, I've come to enjoy your squirming

what the actual fuck is wrong with you

quite a few things, actually

Humans Are Crazy

Aliens have such different gender and biology from humans that none of them menstruate. So imagine this.

Alien: Human Steve, why did I find blood on the lavatory floor?

Steve: Oh, that's just Karen.

Alien: What??

Steve: Human females bleed from their reproductive organs once every month for five to seven days.

Alien: wHAT?!

Steve, calmly: Yeah, they can lose enough blood in a lifetime to kill ten grown men.

Alien: WHaT ?!?!

Karen, walking in: Steve, I need A FUCKING break. And chocolate. And a heating pad. I'll be in my sleeping quarters. Also, I threw up.

Steve: Okay, take the day off, I'll bring you your stuff in a bit.

Alien: *jots down in notebook* Human females are indestructible and fearsome. Regard them with respect.

EDIT: I swear, if this is the thing that makes me Tumblr famous, I’m gonna blow a braincell. And I don’t have many of those left, so…

Edit 2: Guys. Guys. What?! My grumpy menstrual rant is in no way worthy of being tumblr famous. *is mildly to severely confused/thankful/bumfuddled*

Edit 3: Why is this still getting notes wtf

Edit 4: STOP REBLOGING THISSSSSS

edit 5: if you like this, go look at these:

This is now a masterlist.

here’s a midnight shitpost for ya

Literally just stuff that we need more of lol

Omega dynamic: AIZAWA, Xiao, Dabi, Link, Giyuu, SHINSOU

Dying AU: EraserMic, TodoDeku/BakuDeku, DABIHAWKSSSSS, XiaoTher/XiaoLumi, KaveTham, ZeLink

annoyingly fluffy cuddle moments: dadzawa & eri, SHINKAMI, XiaoVen, KazuScara, ShinoGiyuu, KiriBaku

VULNERABLE: AIZAWAAAAAAAAAA, Midoriya, Xiao, Scaramouche/Wanderer, HAWKSYYYYYY, Shooootooooo lol

SOMEONE LINK A GOOD ANGSTY ERASERMIC FIC IN THE COMMENTS PLEASEEEEEEE I NEED DYING AIZAWA AND HIZASHI FREAKING OUT IM SORRY ITS JUST SO GOOD

This isn't an insult but you write like an AI

Maybe I just have adhd but

W h u t

I have no idea what this means

I see the words on the screen

But understanding has left my brain

What the hell

Guys. Guys. Minsungsexual.

I am fricking dead.

did u kno: ur icon is actually you in 20 years