Where We Left Off:

Where we left off:

Nina, purveyor of coffee, whirling into the scene like a thunderstorm, woke our hero from his precious sleep (and a weird dream) to give him - me - another telling-off.

She's quite scary when she's angry. Not demon scary, but most definitely human scary.

"Do you even understand how all of this affects Maggie?" I'm not surprised at the burst of emotion in her voice as she says the name.

"She's been worried sick about you! Trying to write to you, trying to call you, and some days even waiting by your car for you to wake up, so she could make sure you're all right."

"I'm not." How does she even find me? I drive around and park the Bentley in different places every couple of days.

"We KNOW. Do you think none of us has gone through breakup before?"

Well, maybe you have. I certainly haven't. I don't do relationships and I have no idea how to process this. Except for drinking, sleeping and curling up in a little snake ball of pain.

"Of course it's bad. It hurts like hell..."

Worse. Speaking from experience here.

"... and you have every right to be sad and mopey and angry, but stop shutting out your friends. Talk to us! At least let us know where you are and what's going on."

"I don't have friends. Never wanted friends. Completely friendless person, me."

She sighs. "Yes, you're a devil and you're evil, blah blah blah, real man solves his problems on his own. Heard all of that before, except maybe the devil part. But you've got to realize that your actions have consequences for others. You're not alone in this world."

But I am.

I've always been alone. For 6000 years on this godforsaken planet, doing the bidding of my ridiculous headoffice and trying not to go completely insane. Using every excuse to be close to my angel and every excuse not to get too close, so we wouldn't be in trouble. Missing him after every encounter, every meeting, every conversation. Sometimes positively yearning for his presence, but never ever being able to act on it.

Because that's just the way things are.

I was alone the last time I hit rock bottom. Healing one step at a time, slowly piecing myself together after my 33 years of torture. Because I allowed myself to save one human soul and got caught at it. One. Single. Human. Soul.

No good deed goes unpunished.

I never had anyone to talk to because angels are my enemies, demons are my rivals and humans wouldn't be able to shoulder all this bullshit that's been going on with me. And God doesn’t answer to any of us.

And yet, Nina has the nerve to come here, shake me awake and tell me that I'm not alone? That I’m supposed to 'talk about it'? Throw overboard all my harshly earned survival skills because now apparently, I have friends?

No, absolutely not. I don't make 'friends' with other people. It's not something demons - the word is demon, not devil - do. You can stop pretending to care now and walk away.

She doesn’t.

Instead, she throws my very own words back at me. “For once in your life trust somebody!”

~ * ~

More Diary Parts

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 / 13 / 14 / 15 / 16 / 17 / 18 / 19 / 20 / 21

More Posts from Secretdiaryofcrowley and Others

"She was a remarkable woman, Eve!

Hope, you all made some noise for International Women's Day!"

-So....you're Not Like Us? -Nyeah, No, We Look Similar, But We Are Angels. Er, My Colleague Is. I'm A
-So....you're Not Like Us? -Nyeah, No, We Look Similar, But We Are Angels. Er, My Colleague Is. I'm A
-So....you're Not Like Us? -Nyeah, No, We Look Similar, But We Are Angels. Er, My Colleague Is. I'm A

-So....you're not like us? -Nyeah, no, we look similar, but we are angels. Er, my colleague is. I'm a demon. -What's the difference? -Hah, good question. I guess you could say I had to leave our Eden, in a sense. -...and he didn't go with you? -He...that's...It's not like with you and Adam. Uh, sorry for getting you kicked out, by the way. I didn't know She'd be so tetchy about the apple. -Don't be, it was getting kinda boring in there. -...knew I liked you for a reason.

i'm a crowley&eve friendship truther, and a big proponent of nanny! crowley to cain and abel (later events ....notwithstanding)


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"Nah, he's not monstrous, that's utterly ridiculous. He always puts other people's happiness before his own. He doesn't even permit himself to dance with me unless he plans a Jane Austen ball (she has balls) for other people's happiness first.

No, he never was abusive. He was supportive whenever he could and sometimes even, when it would have been the smarter thing to keep his mouth shut.

But, yes, he's a prick. Throwing away everything we could've had, just because he thinks, he can do goody-good in heaven.

They'll roast him alive.

Which they tried to do before."

Fandom acting like Aziraphale is the Bad Guy for asking Crowley to become an angel again is something else. I'm not arguing that offering to turn him into an angel again was the right thing to do, but CONTEXT MATTERS!!

Fandom Acting Like Aziraphale Is The Bad Guy For Asking Crowley To Become An Angel Again Is Something

Things Crowley has canonically said about his fall:

"I never asked to be a demon. I was just minding my own business one day and then… Oh, lookie here, it’s Lucifer and the guys. Oh, hey, the food hadn’t been that good lately. I didn’t have anything on for the rest of that afternoon. Next thing, I’m doing a million-light-year freestyle dive into a pool of boiling sulphur." (Aziraphale appeared to Crowley right after he said this so it's not outside of the realm of possibility that he found Crowley by following his voice in the first place.)

"I didn't mean to fall. I just hung around the wrong people."

"I didn't really fall. I just, you know, sauntered vaguely downwards." (Crowley says this to Aziraphale in the same scene he asks for holy water.)

Fandom Acting Like Aziraphale Is The Bad Guy For Asking Crowley To Become An Angel Again Is Something

Crowley was turned into a demon against his will.

Crowley hates being a demon too. It makes sense that Aziraphale would mistakenly believe that Crowley might accept the idea of becoming an angel again if what we were witnessing was Aziraphale being honest with Crowley in the final fifteen.

Again, I'm not saying he was right to ask that of Crowley, but let's not just decide that Aziraphale is a Bad Person for asking when he's witnessed ways in which Crowley has suffered as a demon.

There is indeed a lesson to be learned here, but why bring a little more context into the situation when it's just easier to villainize Aziraphale, am I right?

Yes, he was wrong to ask Crowley to become an angel again because it's not what Crowley wants. No, he's not a monster for offering. This is seriously all because of their stunning inability to communicate what it is they actually want.

Aziraphale has to break free from whatever hold Heaven still has on him, but he doesn't deserve to be treated like the Bad Guy.

It is entirely possible to criticize Aziraphale's actions without painting him as a monstrous abusive prick.


Tags

Hello! Big fan here.

Just a teeny little question.

Since you're somewhat a snake, do you enjoy things snakes enjoy as a humanoid? Heat lamps, nice rocks to scratch itches on, etc.?

Love your work, especially the M25. Wahoo!

🖤❤️🧡

Well, hello there, big fan.

No, I really prefer the cold.... naaaah! I enjoy warmth both as a snake and as a humanoid. Would use a heat lamp if there was no sun around. And no more angel to put a blanket over me when I'm cold.

As for rocks, no, I can scratch my own itches while in human form. I have hands for that.

And, no, I absolutely do not eat mice. Not even as a snake.

I'm no longer in the business of hellish road construction, so if you happen to have any trouble with bad traffic or crazy madmen drivers, it's not on me. Anyhow, wahoo to you, too!


Tags

Oh, no! Someone made me look cute. 😳

Toys Of Crowley And Aziraphale Made Of Felt❤️‍🔥Handmade🫶🏻

Toys of Crowley and Aziraphale made of felt❤️‍🔥Handmade🫶🏻

Made in Ukraine🇺🇦


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2 months ago

GO unites people of different ages, genders, cultures, countries... There aren't many things that have such a universal language. Terry and Neil wrote a masterpiece, Michael and David made it real. I will never be grateful enough. In the midst of the rubbish of life and the world, it's so nice to find common ground with other people, beyond all barriers. Because this is what GO teaches: there should be no sides, we should simply try to be at peace with ourselves and others. I don't think it's a trivial message, I think it's powerful.

GO Unites People Of Different Ages, Genders, Cultures, Countries... There Aren't Many Things That Have

Light So Heavenly

There is a GO project I wanted to share with you: This February, there was a very cool Good Omens Talent Show on @sendarya's Youtube channel.

There were lots of different categories, for example artwork, original songs, creatives and many many more. My Aziraphale @aziraphalesdiaries submitted a sonnet, which can be found on his youtube channel.

Another one of the categories was song parodies.

We wrote an entry for this one as well. Lyrics are mostly by me, edited by him. He did the recording and mixing of the song, I created the lyric video. Aziraphale's lines are sung by him, Crowley's by me.

The song contains our thoughts about the Final Fifteen, so be prepared for a bit of heartbreak.

As you might guess, "Light So Heavenly" is based on "Defying Gravity" from the musical Wicked.

Watch Light So Heavenly on Youtube.

Your thoughts and comments are greatly appreciated, on our blogs as well as on the video itself. Enjoy the song and leave us some love. Thank you.


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Phone, delete contact "Aziraphale"!

~*~

More Diary Parts:

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 / 13 / 14 / 15 / 16 / 17 / 18 / 19 / 20 / 21


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10 months ago

Exactly. I would give anything for this right now.

What Is The Key To Enjoying Life? (x)
What Is The Key To Enjoying Life? (x)
What Is The Key To Enjoying Life? (x)
What Is The Key To Enjoying Life? (x)
What Is The Key To Enjoying Life? (x)
What Is The Key To Enjoying Life? (x)
What Is The Key To Enjoying Life? (x)
What Is The Key To Enjoying Life? (x)

What is the key to enjoying life? (x)


Tags

I don't know what's worse...

That he doesn't lo... doesn't want to be with me or that he would want to be with me if I was an angel.

~ * ~

More Diary Parts:

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 / 13 / 14 / 15 / 16 / 17 / 18 / 19 / 20 / 21


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secretdiaryofcrowley - Crowley's Secret (not so secret) Diary
Crowley's Secret (not so secret) Diary

Good Omens fanstuff, mostly Crowley's PoV. Post Season 2. Mild content warnings for swearing, misuse of alcohol and angst.

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