Basically, I Think The General Rule Of Thumb Is: If Someone REALLY Wants The Blood That’s Inside Of

hey so it’s march now aka the beginning of endometriosis awareness month and i feel obligated to remind you that debilitatingly painful periods are not normal. if you or someone you know is ending up sick or bedridden every month, you are not crazy and deserve medical attention from someone who will take you seriously

“My parents are very selfish and I have to thank them for that because I’m selfish enough not to have children. Because they were so self-involved, for most of my life I’ve wandered around like a kid lost at a mall just screaming “mommy!”, “daddy!”. I didn’t talk to my father for years but it solved nothing ‘cause I was living in the anger. At some point you’re just gonna have to realize that they’re not going to be the parents you want them to be. That window has closed. You’re going to have to accept them the way that they are and learn how to parent yourself.“

Marc Maron (via catbean715)

reblog and make a wish! this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)

So about 3 years ago, I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression in my final year of highschool. I got splitting headaches every day, blanked out in the middle of tests, broke down regularly, was extremely suspicious of people, tried to please everyone, the works. It didn't really help that I am really competitive about my studies.

In the short term, I would first recommend going to a doctor - there are medications that can actually reduce the immediate feeling of anxiety, lower your heart rate and calm you in stressful situations. Knowing you're on something that works can make you more confident in your ability to overcome it, too. My psychiatrist also recommended some breathing exercises in those moments - take deep slow breaths, and concentrate on how your tummy moves in and out with each. It takes your mind off the situation. Control your body language - if you have to, imagine you are your favourite cool character in your favourite show or book. No matter how you feel, force yourself to walk confidently into a situation. Tell yourself you can handle it. Trust me, it really works.

In the long run, you will have to work with yourself. Therapy is useful, but you don't really need to go. Figure out which thought processes are telling you that you should conform to other people's expectations, and challenge them every time you start to think that way. Tell yourself that you are amazing, every time. They should be glad they know you. I would say, set a goal for yourself, maybe talk to a new person every month, or join a club for you've never done before. Keep trying, and make an active note of your improvements.

Try to actively avoid things that depress you, even if you like them. Some of my favourite songs and books are depressing, and I have avoided them for a while. If you are going to go to them, focus on other things - how nice the voice sounds or the particular style of writing. Actively find things that pump you up, and pursue them. Listen to deep bass in your music, find books or shows that crack you up. Tell yourself you can and will be happy. Make stupid jokes and laugh at yourself. Try to challenge pessimistic thinking. Try to walk with a spring in your step, even when you're tired. Get excited about things you like.

Remember, it's all up to you. You can choose to wallow in your issues, or try to overcome them. It won't be quick, and it won't be easy, but it's the only real way you can do it. Remember, there are lots of people with the same problems who have gotten over them, who are happy and successful.

All the best. We're all here for you.

Hi i really need advice on how to overcome anxiety. Lately I've been really down because I've recently come to realization that life is moving way to fast and that I'm not really living it like a normal teenager should because I'm letting my anxiety and what other people think get in the way of what I want to do in life. Also because I tend to be skeptical a lot, it causes me to be pessimistic with really bothers be because I really just want to be a happy positive person. Plz help me plz!!!

anyone wanna tackle this one?

Dear Fandom, 

I’m writing this because because there has been drama. I am not writing it aimed at of the specific root of the drama, but at the sick oozing puss that has seeped out of that drama. I’m writing this because of the hate. The hate that’s spread from that drama and touched the lives of so many people I know and care about. 

I don’t like discourse, anyone who’s followed me for a while knows I like to stay out of it and promote the more positive side of things, but it’s gotten to the point this time where I’m angry. I’m angry for friends and I’m angry because none of this should have happened, and yet here we are sitting in a pool of anger and frustration and hurt. 

So I have a few things to say. I have some questions and I have some thoughts, and lastly I have a challenge for you: Fandom. 

This probably does not apply to most of you, and I’m unsure if it will sway those of you perpetuating the hate, but I need to say it and I hope you will at the very least listen. 

I have to know, Fandom, when did you forget why we were all here? When did you forget that Fandom is about community? That community means a melting of ideas, personalities, and most of all a meeting place of People? When did you allow the flood of images and text to erase the fact that behind all of that are real, living, breathing, humans? Of different ages, races, genders, and personalities? 

I joined fandom because I didn’t want to be alone. I joined for the joy of being able to share in this experience (and in my case it’s Batman) with you all. I sat down and said “I love this and I want to talk about it with people. I want to get excited about or whine about or simply engage in this thing with others”. We all did, right? We all wanted to see someone else’s excitement burst out of them. Wanted to see what others would create. Wanted to create for others. Wanted to have a group to talk to about this cool thing we’ve found. 

We came here for passion, and in many ways I think that has become warped. I think that somewhere between passion and engagement we forgot that Usernames/Icons = people. It’s an easy thing to forget. It’s something I’ve forgotten and I’ve regretted that. I have to remind myself every day that the people I interact with online are like me, they’re someone excited to share in this adventure that is fandom. I also think this forgetting is a cause of the grumblings that bleed from a fandom. We forget that it’s another person on the other side of the screen and lash out. 

What I don’t understand is the utter venom with which some people spread that anger. What drives someone to tell another person to kill themselves? What drives them to threaten harm or wish rape upon someone? How can this hate be so visceral? What good does it do to anyone? 

In looking at these question, I find myself looking at the reason for Discourse. I believe that a lot of discourse comes from good intentions. I think that many times one person enters into discussion with another with the intent to converse, and then it snowballs into something worse. And I think that internet culture has created a space where we gang up on a single individual for being “wrong”. Call it purity culture or cancel culture or whatever term you have for it, it only serves to take good intentions and turn them sour. It only serves to hurt. 

We have somehow lost wanting to talk about what’s right in the face of needing to be the one who is right. And I think that’s created a lot of the trouble we have. 

I think that we, in this wide world of letting everyone see everything, have lost the blessing of personal conversations. I think we have forgotten that some people know less. Some people are young. Some people will never be swayed. And sometimes, yes, we are wrong. 

Something we have gained–to our detriment– is the idea that the internet is here for us. That creators are here to give us what we want, when we want it, and how we want it. And the thing with that is that it’s backwards. 

It’s up to you to curate your online experience. Websites are built in with age restrictions (not that anyone follows them, but again: up to you). Most creators I know are good enough to tag things properly. To give warnings. To tell people Hey! Lookout! But even if they didn’t it’s not up to them to curate your experience for you, Fandom. That’s your job. That’s what the unfollow button is for. That’s what filters are for. That’s what the block button is for. That’s why that sweet bunny Thumper said all those years ago “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all”.

If you don’t agree with/like/enjoy something, then why on Earth are you engaging with it? 

Let’s say you like a creator and honestly do want to engage with the content, and still disagree. Why on earth are you sending hate? Why send threats? Why be so cruel? If you want to talk about something: Talk. If you’d like to sway a creator’s point of view: have a discussion. Before you go and tell someone they’re wrong, consider how getting that ask would feel if it were you. Be aware that that person is a Person and maybe they will never agree with you.

This isn’t me saying don’t engage, and don’t converse, it’s me saying that when do, do it the right way. Do it considering the other person. Do not do it so you can have the pleasure of knocking them down a few pegs (even if you utterly disagree). Do it with kindness, not hate. Perpetuating hate against someone is wrong and not the answer. And if you absolutely cannot message someone respectfully, then yes this is me saying don’t message them at all. 

Here’s the thing about hate. It’s toxic. Hate is gross. Hate only breeds worse things. Hate turns misunderstandings into Discourse. Hate turns attempts at peace into floods of anons in inboxes and the screaming voices of (one or two maybe three) people into a repetitive thud thud thud of thunderous terror and fear and that sick swimming pit in your stomach. 

Hate brings out the dregs of humanity and it puts them on a show for their own benefit. Hate online, (on tumblr, but probably everywhere) is for the benefit of the one spewing the poison. It is so the hater can sit back and crow about how they have hurt how they have won how they have conquered over the little back text on the little white screen and how their words have become the victor.  

Hate does nothing good. 

We are all different and have different opinions and that’s okay! It’s good to be different, and challenge each other (in a positive way). Just remember that no one is perfect and no one should be held on a pedestal. 

So here is my challenge to you, Fandom: 

Be kind

Be gracious 

Respect others

Give someone the benefit of the doubt 

Remember that we all came here for the same reason

Do not spew hate, pause a moment and consider your words

And because it bears repeating: Be kind 

We mostly agree that Will is very similar to Sarcean — he can’t tell the truth to save his life, he’s sneaky, calculated, smart, and we can’t forget his thing for blondes. But if that’s the case, how similar is James, simply personality-wise, to Anharion? How does that impact the story? James is capable of so much spite and anger and viciousness, especially at betrayal, what does his almost romantic feelings at the memory of Sarcean mean?

March 2017 Book Discussion Challenge, day 9

Guilty Pleasure

I was well into typing this post about my consumption of Sophie Kinsella books in my teens, when I realised two things:

First, it’s been years since I read those books, so they’re not really my guilty pleasure, or any kind of pleasure for that matter.

Second, I don’t think chick lit as a genre really needs any more hate, even if a good portion of these books perpetuate heteronormative gender roles and idealised fantasies of what romance is.

Consequently, my question is this: why should anything you read be considered a guilty pleasure? If you enjoy it, why should you feel guilty? And if you feel guilty for reading it, maybe you shouldn’t be reading it at all?

😞

Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Don’t be pushed by your problems. Be led by your dreams.”

“He who is not everyday conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life.”

J.K. Rowling

“Anything’s possible if you’ve got enough nerve.”

“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all, in which case you have failed by default.”

“I would like to be remembered as someone who did the best she could with the talent she had.”

John Green

“What is the point of being alive if you don’t at least try to do something remarkable?”

“If you don’t imagine, nothing ever happens at all.”

“At some point, you just pull off the Band-Aid, and it hurts, but then it’s over and you’re relieved.”

“In spite of it all, hope is not misguided.”

Ernest Hemingway

“We are all apprentices in a craft where no one ever becomes a master.”

“The world breaks everyone, and afterward, many are strong at the broken places.”

“The first and final thing you have to do in this world is to last it and not be smashed by it.”

“Live the full life of the mind, exhilarated by new ideas, intoxicated by the Romance of the unusual.” 

Marilyn Monroe

“Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.” 

Dalai Lama

“Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.”

Unknown

“What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it.”

“Happiness is not the absence of problems, it’s the ability to deal with them.”

“Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.”

“Adventure may hurt you, but monotony will kill you.”

inspiration

Giveaway Contest: We’re giving away ten vintage paperback classics by F. Scott Fitzgerald, Jane Austen, Harper Lee, Walt Whitman, George Orwell, and others. Won’t these look lovely on your shelf? :D To win these classics, you must: 1) be following macrolit on Tumblr (yes, we will check. :P), and 2) reblog this post. We will randomly choose a winner on April 22, at which time we’ll start a new giveaway. And yes, we’ll ship to any country. Easy, right? Good luck!