Things From The Tsunami Arc That Altered My Brain Chemistry Irrevocably And Eternally:

things from the tsunami arc that altered my brain chemistry irrevocably and eternally:

buck's hand twisted in christopher's shirt pre-wave

you're gonna be okay, kid and the hand on buck's face

the way buck cups christopher's head when he's finally got him in his arms

and the way he clings to christopher as soon as they're up on the fire truck for the rest of the episodes, always keeping chris nestled against his side or tucked under his chin whenever he's not saving people

how he freezes when he hears christopher fall in and just Knows its chris

buck finding christopher's glasses

the fact that we see the moment buck cuts himself and he doesn't even react because he's too heartbroken to feel anything else besides the grief

do i even need to mention buck carrying himself through most of LA on willpower alone?

or the black tent?

or buck calling maddie and not even worrying about telling eddie, just worrying about christopher, until he sees him at the VA hospital?

or how eddie nods as buck stammers through his explanation like he believes that its not buck's fault even as his heart is breaking over losing his child?

or the way buck hands eddie christopher's glasses?

or he was looking for buck?

how about the way eddie presses his forehead to christopher's temple?

and the Look between buck and eddie? buck, disbelieving, relieved, just utterly and completely relieved because whatever happens next, even if he never gets to see his diaz boys again, at least christopher is alive. and eddie, disbelieving, relieved, entirely and wondrously in awe of the man that kept his son safe and alive despite a tsunami.

and buck collapsing because finally, finally his job is done. nothing else matters now.

not to mention!!! the After

wait for me to come home my beloved <3

buck's whole voiceover

the way chris walks into the loft and rests his head against buck's stomach, trusting him to wrap him in a hug, and the way buck hesitates like he's not sure he's allowed

eddie pushing in, eddie, the strong silent type, filling the silence that buck would usually to try to drown (poor choice of words, i admit) out whatever thoughts are going through buck's head as he tries to object to being left alone

eddie's instantaneous, easy switch from nonchalant teasing to serious reassuring

two men five centimetres apart because they are gay!

eddie's hand on buck's shoulder and the fucking thumb on his neck... kill me :D

eddie being honest and vulnerable about his parenting

i love him enough to never stop trying and i know you do too because of course eddie has just had more than enough evidence of that, and not just evidence but tsunami-proof evidence that buck would quite literally go to the ends of the earth for christopher, but this quote, buddie or not, links buck to christopher, to that co-parent role, indefinitely and irrefutably

eddie's little comment about buck losing weight (sir... why are you paying so much attention 🤨)

and FUCK, perhaps the worst of them all, eddie pausing in the doorway, one hand on the doorframe, eyes down as he says buck's name and that little moment of hesitation before he looks up and says thank you. for not giving up.