WHAT ONCE WAS || NI-KI
WHAT ONCE WAS || NI-KI
pairing: idol!niki x actress!reader
synopsis: Years after your long-term relationship break up, you catch a glimpse of your ex on the news. But, he’s an upcoming star in a korean boy band group. Preparing for their upcoming music video, you're selected as the female lead. Will seeing each other after so long hender your hard-earned founded careers?
genre: old lovers to strangers to lovers, SUGGESTIVEE AFFFF, AU famous, use of irl famous people & films, kinda slow burn?
warnings: angst, suggestive, altered roles in films
wc: 7.5K
The lights of the studio were blinding, but you smiled through it, the practiced grace of an actress trained to charm cameras. It became second-nature to you, after years of blood, sweat, and tears. Many, tears.
Your undeniable hard work.
Across from you, the interviewer leaned in, her voice light but sharp, the way all seasoned hosts wrapped their punches in cunning enthusiasm. It was the 6th interview in the last 2 weeks, and every last one implemented the same topic. It was exhausting.
“You’ve worked with so many big names recently,” she said, her pen poised over her notepad.
“But I have to ask—there’s been a lot of talk about you and Ni-ki of Enhypen. Any truth to the rumors?”
There it was.
The repetitive, infuriating, question you've dreaded.
Your breath hitched, but you didn’t flinch. On the surface, the question was about your recent collaboration on the upcoming music video. Beneath it, though, was the unspoken truth you've spent years burying, desperately trying to forget.
To obliterate, completely.
Ni-ki wasn’t just a co-star or the idol dominating global charts. No, you both knew he was far from that.
You swallowed, pushing away all insistent memories you've forgotten you had. You laughed softly, the kind that said nice try without confirming anything.
“Ni-ki is an incredible talent,” you smiled, leaning back in your chair, “It was an honor to work with him and the boys.”
The interviewer smiled knowingly, “Some would say there’s more to the story. Any comment on the chemistry fans noticed between you two—both on and off-screen?”
you looked away, just for a heartbeat, as the memories rushed back.
Late-night walks in the quiet streets of the home-town you both grew up in, whispered dreams of making it big, and the final, shattering silence that left you both broken.
You smiled again, the professional mask slipping back into place.
“The chemistry,” you said, “is all part of the performance.”
You knew what it meant to be an actress, a global sensation, at that. You had dealt with hate, rumors, and scandals many times during your career. None of it was new to you, not that any of it was bigger than your fan base and public admiration towards you. You had billboards, luxury brand partnership, and magazines on your success and beauty. You're doing extraordinarily well. Romantic rumors between you and your co-stars wasn't new, fans love to group together actors with "chemistry." Not that it was bothersome, your publicity teams used this as advertisement to boost the views for your films, they even encouraged to subtly feed into your fans delusion. It was harmless.
4 years ago, you were nothing but a girl with passionate dreams. With huge dreams to be an actress, a star. If it wasn't for the profound heartbreak you went through back then, you wouldn't have had the courage to leave your small home-town without looking back once. As the years went by, you worked hard and gained recognition like wildfire. Not only were you talented but also undeniably beautiful, big roles were given to you insistently. You were incredibly grateful, to all your fans and support staff, so you worked evermore harder on your acting and events. It was all you felt you had after leaving your home-town, alone. You couldn't let them down, it was your motivation to be better. It was a testament of your hard work, that you could be someone in this world despite of your poor past. Or the betrayals.
A month ago, you were incredibly busy with your demanding schedule. After finally wrapping up Lovely Runner and only a few events left to attend, you had time to breathe. You barely had time to yourself, let alone to watch the news or care about the media. Not if it wasn't PR or about your work. That was, until you absentmindedly decided to turn on the channel news on a random Saturday night. Why would you do that? Out of all days, too. The only time you had to yourself, the only time you decide to indulge yourself with the media, you come face-to-face with the last person you ever thought you'd see again.
Your ex.
Only, he's not there as your ex but as an upcoming kpop idol.
Your heart drops at the sound of his name said by the reporter and his face up-close on the screen. Yes, its undoubtly him. You stop in your tracks, facing the screen of your echoing tv, in the living room of your penthouse. Suddenly, the cup of tea slips from your unresponsive hands and shatters onto the floor. Your assistant rushes out to you, her eyes widening in concern.
"y/n, are you okay? What happened?" She asks, pulling you away from the mess.
You stammer, "I'm...yeah, I'm fine. I-I don't know what...what happened. It must've slipped."
You manage to snap out of the trance, helping your assitant, Kate, clean up the mess. Your eyes frequently find the TV screen, attentively listening to the content. You feel as if a cold sweat has overcame you, you feel nauseous, the shock draining the color from your face.
Get a fucking grip, y/n. What difference does it make now that you know he's doing well? So what if he's a star? You're doing your own thing now, you wont ever cross paths with him. Let it go.
You take a final deep breath, turning off the TV and pushing back the memory of his face on the news.
You were sure you weren't going to see him again, after all, you're an actress. When will a busy actress like you ever meet with a busy idol?
The red carpet glistened under the camera flashes, a sea of faces cheering as you stepped out of the car, your gown flowing like liquid starlight. This was supposed to be your moment—a night to celebrate your tenth major acting award nomination. The big, luxurious, successful ten.
But then you heard it: a name called out by fans down the carpet, echoing like a forgotten melody. His name. Your heart stalled as you turned toward the commotion, and there he was, stepping onto the same carpet from a sleek black van, surrounded by his group members. The world knew him as the rising star of Enhypen, the global sensation boy band.
But to you, he was just Ni-ki—the boy who had once held your heart.
The crowd roared as the lights dimmed, the announcer’s voice booming through the grand stadium. The biggest night in entertainment had brought out the stars, and you were seated front and center, right where the cameras loved you most. Your stylist’s work was flawless—an elegant gown shimmering like stardust, paired with a smile that was as breathtaking and admirable as your reputation.
“And the award for Best International Collaboration goes to…”
The host's pause stretched endlessly, and you leaned back, feigning nonchalance for the cameras. But as soon as the name was announced, the room erupted in cheers.
“Enhypen, featuring Selena Grace!”
You clapped politely, your smile widening for the benefit of the cameras.
Of course, they’d win. Enhypen was unstoppable, and their song XO—an international smash—had cemented their status as global icons. Niki's face flashed on the massive screens as he and his bandmates stood, their tailored suits gleaming under the stage lights.
You kept your eyes onto the big displaying screens, your hands folded neatly in your lap as Jungwon signaled him to deliver the speech. He nods, stepping towards the mic.
“Thank you to the fans,” he began with a charming smile, his voice alluring and low.
“This wouldn’t have been possible without your love and support," He extends his hand out to signal at someone in the crowd, "And, of course, to Selena Grace, who brought magic to this project.”
The camera cut to Selena, seated just a few rows behind you, blowing him a kiss. Your smile faltered, just for a second. You quickly regain your composure, just in case the camera unexpectedly lands on you. You don't want to create unnecessary content for people to delude.
As the applause died down and the show moved on, you braced yourself for your category. Fame had taught you the art of composure, but tonight, you felt like you were unraveling. You wanted nothing than to go home and enjoy your peace.
The announcer’s voice rang through the stadium, cutting through the applause like a beacon.
“And the award for Best Actress in a Leading Role goes to… Y/n L/n!”
The room erupted into cheers and applause, the sound crashing over you like a wave. You felt the cameras zoom in, capturing every detail—the way you pressed your hands to your chest in mock surprise, the graceful way you rose to your feet, the dazzling smile that lit up you face. All of it was calculated, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t real.
As you made your way to the stage, your co-star Byeon Woo-seok in your latest drama Lovely Runner, helped the train of your gown that trailed behind you like liquid gold up the small case of stairs in courteously. But you knew it was also partly just a publicity stunt to feed into the fans who shipped you both together. The audience went louder at this, the host's smiling at the scene before them. It was a sweet gesture. He placed his hand on your lower back, protectively to ensure you could safely walk up the stage. Once safely on the stage, you exchange polite short talk and he rushes back to his seat. The cameras switch back to the crowd, It caught a flicker of movement in the audience.
Niki. He was clapping, his expression unreadable. For a fleeting moment, you locked eyes with him through the big screen. It was as if no time had passed, as if you were back in those quiet moments when it was just you and him in your small home-town.
Then the moment was gone, you quickly looked away and you were back in the spotlight.
The statuette was heavier than you expected as you accepted it, its shiny surface cool against your fingers. The host handed you the microphone, and you turned to face the audience—a sea of faces, cameras, and adoration.
“Wow,” you began, your voice steady and sweet despite the pounding of your heart.
“This… this is truly an honor. Acting has been my dream for as long as I can remember, and to be standing here once again tonight feels like a dream come true," you laugh, softly.
Polite laughter rippled through the room. You continued, your tone warm and heartfelt, the kind of sincerity that always won over the public. Like your last nine awards.
“There are so many people I need to thank—my director, my incredible cast," you smile as the camera cuts to your handsome co-star, "Woo-seok, thank you so much for being such a wonderful partner."
He smiles sheepishly, shaking his head.
"My team who works tirelessly behind the scenes, and, of course, my fans. You’ve made this journey possible, and I’m so grateful for your unwavering support," You continued.
The applause swelled again, and you smiled, letting it wash over you. But as you glanced out at the audience, your eyes land onto the big screen which found Niki once more. This time, his gaze was steady, his expression softer. For a split second, you faltered. Your attention shifts back to the mic.
“And to everyone out there chasing their dreams,” you added, your voice catching slightly, “never give up. You never know how far they’ll take you.”
The audience cheered as you stepped back from the microphone. Your heart was still racing as you made your way offstage, clutching the award like a lifeline.
When the award show was over, you lingered around, talking and socializing with other actors and idols. You spoke to some reporters and did quick interviews.
Kate stayed behind you, following you as you made your way through the crowd. Your smile lit up at the sight of Woo-seok waving you over. As you made your way, the view became clearer. Your eyes land on Woo-seok's company, Enhypen. Your smile faltered a bit. You stand next to Woo-seok as you exchange polite greetings with Enhypen.
“You were amazing up there," Jay said, flashing you a polite smile.
you return the smile, humbly denying.
"That was all you guys, congratulations on the new album," you beamed.
“That speech," Niki speaks up, "it reminded me of someone I used to know.”
The voice made your breath get stuck in your throat for a moment. Turning to face him, you found Niki standing, his hands tucked casually into the pockets of his tailored suit. It's the first time you've seen him since the incident.
your eyes flicker and before you knew it, your mind spoke for itself, “People change.”
“Some things don’t," His response is quick, as if he knew what you were going to say. His gaze lingered, heavy with unspoken words.
You both look into each other's eyes fiercely. Thankfully, Jake changes the topic, starting lively conversation between Woo-seok and the boys. Niki and I stay quiet for a bit, the tension unbearably suffocating. You shake it off, jumping back into conversation with them, completely disregarding NIki. Great, now they will start to suspect. Could this get any worse for you?
Soon after, their director comes over to you. You greet him as he showers you in humble compliments.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you something," he said, looking back and forth between you and Enhypen.
you tilt your head, actively listening.
“Our team’s planning a music video for Enhypen's next single. A big one. And I have someone specific in mind for the lead," he explains.
You look over at the boys, nodding your head cheerfully, "Is that so? That's really great, I'll be rooting for you guys!"
"Actually, Y/n..." Sunoo trails off, exchanging looks with the other members.
“Let me guess,” you said, “Selena Grace?”
“No,” Niki stepped closer, his voice lowering, “You.”
Your eyes widen in surprise, you whip your head toward the director for clarification. You've faced countless directors, producers, and critics, but this? This was different. You've never been in a music video, let alone for a famous Korean boy band.
“Really? Me? You think that’s a good idea?” you asked, your voice laced with denial yet gratitude.
The director smiled, nodding.
"We think you're perfect for the role," he turned to the boys, "don't we?"
You turn to face them, still in disbelief. Kate starts typing in her phone, probably sending off the information to your manager.
Niki holds a unreadable expression, “I think it’s the best idea.”
You furrowed your eyebrows at him, confused at his weird behaviour. You would think that after what happened the last time you both saw each other, your interactions would be vastly different. Yet, It's alarmingly peaceful, with a hint of passive-aggressive.
He smiled faintly, the kind that used to make your heart race.
That following week, news on your collaboration spread like wildfire, it became the most spoken topic and the shooting hasn't even finished. Papparazzi's followed and increased, appearing at your meetings sites with Enhypen. It was a global anticipation, your biggest project of all.
On the first official day of shooting, the set buzzed with energy as Enhypen arrived. Niki's bandmates were larger-than-life in person, their charisma radiating like a collective force field.
And, oh, so handsome.
They stood in a group, laughing and joking as if they hadn’t just stepped off a whirlwind tour.
The sun blazed high over the set, casting golden light across the sprawling outdoor location. The production team buzzed like a hive, cameras and lighting rigs being adjusted, assistants darting between trailers, and the director shouting final instructions. Amid the chaos, you sat in the makeup chair, staring at your reflection.
The makeup artist added the finishing touches, but your nerves weren’t about your appearance. Today was the first day of filming Enhypen's music video—and the first time you'd be working with Niki as professionals since your lives diverged. You hated it, utterly despised him and the thought of being around him another second longer. But you knew it wasn't fair for the rest of the nice crew, after all, it was just this and nothing more. You wouldn’t even need to really interact with him, right? Just endure it a little longer...
“Y/n L/n!” Jay called out, his voice warm and playful. You smoothed the soft fabric of the ethereal dress the costume team had chosen for you as you stepped out. All eyes seemed to follow, the weight of your “dream girl” reputation trailing like a shadow. The staff helped you out of the trailer, staying careful with your dress. You waved, cheerfully, greeting them.
Jungwon gave you a polite bow, “Thank you for agreeing to work with us. The fans are already calling this the collaboration of the year.”
“No pressure, right?” you joked, earning a few chuckles.
Behind him, the remaining members hung back slightly, though their smiles were welcoming. It was clear they all shared an easy camaraderie, the kind that came from years of working, traveling, and growing together.
As you filled your bottle with water, you could feel Niki's gaze, though he hadn’t said a word.
“Don’t be shy,” Heeseung chimed in, clearly relishing the opportunity to engage, “We were just talking about our most embarrassing moments on stage. Do you have one?”
you turned, tilting your head slightly in thought, “Embarrassing moments? Hmm…”
“There was one time during a premiere when I tripped on my dress. Right in front of a live audience and the cameras," you shook your head, recalling the embarrassment at just the thought.
Sunghoon gasped theatrically, “The dream girl… tripped?”
“It happens,” you said with a shrug, laughing.
“But I recovered gracefully, if I do say so myself," you boasted, playfully.
“Of course you did,” Sunoo said, flashing a sweet smile.
“You’re Y/n L/n. You probably made it look like part of the act," Jake joked.
The room burst into laughter, and you couldn’t help but feel a little at ease.
Niki finally spoke, his voice cutting through the lighthearted chatter, “You’ve always been good at making things look effortless.”
The tone of his compliment was subtle, but the room seemed to sense the shift. The laughter died down, and for a moment, the air between you both felt suffocating.
Jay, ever the mediator, clapped his hands together, “Well, since we’re all here, should we teach y/n some choreography from the song?”
you raised an eyebrow, laughing nervously, “Oh no, I’m not a dancer.”
Sunghoon smirked, “You’re an actress. You can pretend to be one.”
Before you could protest, Sunoo was pulling you closer to them, “It’s easy! Just the chorus—Niki, show her.”
Niki shifted reluctantly, but there was a glimmer of amusement in his eyes. He positioned himself beside you, demonstrating a smooth trail with his arms followed by a quick footwork sequence.
“Like this,” he said, his voice quieter now.
you tried to mimic the movement, fumbling awkwardly. The group erupted into laughter, Jake doubling over onto Sunghoon dramatically.
“Okay, okay, I get it,” you said, throwing your hands up in surrender, “Stick to acting for me.”
Niki chuckled softly, his smile genuine, “You weren’t that bad.”
you met his gaze, and for a moment, you felt your breath get stuck in your throat. You quickly looked away, suppressing your thoughts.
“I swear i’m not this bad at dancing,” you defended, playfully, “it just went a little too fast for me to catch on to.”
As the crew finalized the next setup, the director approached, clapping his hands, “Alright, everyone! Let’s get the group shot lined up. Y/n, you’ll be center stage with the guys circling you. We want this to feel like a dream sequence—intense, almost otherworldly.”
you moved to your positions, and you found yourself surrounded by the seven of them. Each carried a distinct presence: Sunghoons quiet confidence, Jake’s playful energy, Heeseungs brooding intensity, Sunoo’s charming warmth, Jungwons calm concentration, Jay’s cool collectiveness, and Niki… well, Niki was Niki: Reserved.
“Alright, everyone, eyes on y/n,” the director called, “This is about the connection. She’s the muse, the untouchable figure you’re drawn to. Feel the tension.”
As the music swelled and the cameras rolled, the guys slipped effortlessly into their roles. You executed your simple choreography gracefully, focusing. Their gazes were piercing, their movements fluid, creating an aura that felt both surreal and magnetic.
But it was Niki’s gaze that unsettled you the most. His eyes locked onto yours, carrying an intensity that blurred the line between performance and reality.
“Cut!” the director called, sounding thrilled, “That was perfect. Let’s reset for the close-ups.”
As the crew adjusted the lighting, Jay leaned in conspiratorially, “You’re a natural at this.”
“Ever thought about switching careers? We could use a eighth member,” Sunoo smiled.
“Only if you want your fans to riot,” you teased.
The group laughed, but Niki stayed quiet, his focus still on you. It made you uncomfortable, catching his gazes frequently. You couldn’t think straight, and it frustrated you.
“Alright, alright,” the director interrupted, “Let’s keep this energy going.”
As you moved back into position, you caught Niki watching you again. This time, his expression was softer, almost unreadable.
“Ready?” he asked, his voice low enough that only you could hear.
“Always,” you replied, meeting his gaze head-on. You look away, giving him the cold shoulder.
After your small break, as you approached the director, he clapped his hands together.
“Perfect timing! Niki, y/n, let’s go over the first solo scene,” he instructed.
You falter for a moment.
You have a solo scene with Niki? Could the universe hate you even more?
you gathered around the monitor as he explained the setup. The concept was intimate: Niki, a mysterious figure, would catch glimpses of you in a dream-like world, your connection growing through fleeting encounters. The chemistry between you would carry the narrative.
“Chemistry,” you thought, biting back a wry smile. That wouldn’t be a problem. If anything, the challenge was hiding it.
The first shot involved you walking barefoot through a field, the breeze catching the hem of your dress, while Niki watched from a distance. Simple enough.
“Positions, everyone!” the assistant director called.
you took your mark, feeling the cool grass beneath your feet, and glanced at Niki. He stood at his mark, hands in his pockets, his gaze fixed on you. The look in his eyes sent a ripple through you—curiosity, recognition, and something deeper that he didn’t try to hide.
“Action!”
Your eyes flickered as you snapped back into reality. The world around you fell silent as you moved through the scene, every step slow and deliberate. Niki’s presence loomed at the edge of your awareness, his gaze a constant weight. You glanced back over your shoulder as directed, and your eyes met.
Time seemed to slow.
For a moment, it wasn’t the camera capturing you but the past pulling you back to a place you both tried to leave behind.
“Cut!” the director called, breaking the trance.
He clapped enthusiastically, “That was beautiful. Perfect connection. Let’s reset for the next shot.”
you exhaled, only then realizing you’ve been holding your breath. Niki approached as the crew adjusted the setup.
“You’re good at this,” he said quietly, his voice low enough that only you could hear.
Yet it felt sarcastic to you. It irked you.
“Took a lot of hard work and many sacrifices,” you replied, keeping your tone neutral.
His eyes narrowed, his lips twitching into a faint smile, but his eyes searched yours as if trying to read what you weren’t saying.
The next scene involved you standing closer, your hands nearly touching but never quite meeting. The director called it a “moment of almost,” the kind of shot that fans would replay endlessly.
As you both stood there, your hands hovering inches apart, the tension between you both became palpable.
“Action!”
you turned toward him, your character’s longing meant to be subtle yet undeniable. But as your eyes met, the emotions spilling from him felt too real. For a second, you wondered if Niki was acting at all—or if he, like you, were still caught in the echoes of what you used to be.
Of what once was.
The final day of shooting had been grueling, but the wrap party was in full swing. The studio’s rooftop terrace glittered with string lights and a panoramic view of the city skyline. Cast, crew, and industry insiders mingled, laughing and toasting to the success of the project. You were tired of keeping a front for the reporters and photographers. Being close to Niki, feeling his touch on your skin, his gaze on yours—it was all too overwhelming. Moreover, it didn’t make anything better that fans and media shipped you both together after the music video was released. Countless of interviews included him, you felt as if all your hard work was underestimated because of Niki. As if your boost in popularity was mostly because of him. It irritated you.
You worked hard for this. You made it out for yourself. No thanks to him. All you wanted was to be as far as you could from him.
You leaned against the railing, a glass of champagne in hand, but your mind was elsewhere. The past few weeks had been a whirlwind of emotions. Working with Niki had stirred up everything you’ve buried—the longing, the heartbreak, the unresolved tension. And tonight, it felt like it was all teetering on the edge of spilling over. You were so fed up. The pretentious act, the subtle messages, the mixed signals. Everything.
“You’re quiet tonight.”
His voice came from behind you, gentle and steady. You didn’t have to turn to know it was Niki.
You exhaled slowly, irritated, “Just tired.”
He stepped closer, the warmth of his presence cutting through the cool night air.
“Tired, or avoiding me?”
you turn around to face him, “What are you talking about?”
His expression was calm, but his eyes spoke many messages. He shoves his hands in his pockets, sighing.
“You’ve been distant. Since that scene last week, you’ve barely looked at me, let alone talked to me. Why?” he urged, his expression holding a look of longing.
you roll your eyes, the frustration bubbling up, “I’m just doing my job. Isn’t that what we’re supposed to be doing?”
He shook his head, a bitter laugh escaping his lips, “Don’t do that. Don’t pretend this is just work. I know you felt it—every moment we’ve had together on set, it wasn’t just acting. And you’re running from it.”
your chest tightened, his words hitting too close to the truth than you like. You set your glass down on the railing, your hands trembling.
“What do you want me to say? That I feel something? That being around you again makes me question everything I’ve tried to move past?”
“Yes,” he said, his voice breaking slightly. Your eyebrows furrow.
“Because it’s the same for me. I tried to move on, y/n, but you… you’re everywhere. And now, working with you, it’s like every wall I built is crumbling.”
you stared at him, the weight of his confession crashing into you.
You scoffed, annoyed and in disbelief at his audacity. This isn’t how the story went in your book. No.
“You left, Niki! You chose this life, this path. You can’t just show yourself in front of me after not hearing from you for years and expect me to pretend like everything is fine,” you fumed, tears clouding your vision.
His jaw tightened, “I looked for you! I came back to our hometown, I…I searched for you everywhere. But it was too late. They told me you were gone. I didn’t know where to look for you, y/n...”
Your eyes flickered in shock. Your heart dropped. He looked for you? Why didn’t you know any of this? No one ever told you that he came back for you…but still, to act like this after leaving in the first place is uncalled for. What difference does it make, right? But why is your heart beating so fast? Why is your body longing for his touch?
He steps closer to you, “I was so stupid for leaving you alone in the first place, I know. I got caught up with my schedule and training that I couldn’t even sleep, let alone text. Training was intense and immersive at the company, we weren’t allowed to communicate. By the time they were more lenient with communicating, i left you so many messages and calls. Why didn’t you answer?”
You blink, slowly taking in the information, “I had changed my number. After being ghosted by my own boyfriend, seeing you be all successful on your own and feeling like you forgot about me, hurt me. It’s when I started my acting career.”
He shook his head, “I could never abandon you, it wasn’t on purpose, y/n. I thought about you every single second. You were my motivation. I thought once i was successful enough, i’d be able to find you quicker. That you’d come find me.”
“You just decided for both of us, and I was supposed to be okay with it? Do you know what it felt like to see you fade away without a word? I was worried sick for you! I didn’t know where to find you or reach you. I even worried that you were dead! Just like that, without even officially ending it, the relationship we had built was gone in an instant. How could you do this to me?” you bit your lip, holding back the urge to cry.
The silence that followed was deafening. His shoulders slumped slightly, the fight draining out of him, “I never meant for this to happen. I never meant to hurt you. But I see now that I hurt you more than anything else ever could. And I regret it so much.”
you crossed your arms, trying to keep a calm and collected composure despite the burning feeling in your throat from trying not to cry, “You did.”
For a moment, neither of you spoke, the sounds of the party fading into the background.
Then, softly, he said, “I don’t want to hurt you again, y/n. But I don’t know how to stop feeling this way.”
you shook your head, tears threatening to spill, “You don’t get to say that now, Niki. You don’t get to just… come back into my life and make me feel like this all over again. Not after years of loving you—waiting for you.”
He softly flinched, his expression softening. He reached for your hand, but you pulled away, stepping back.
“I can’t do this,” you whispered, your voice breaking, “I can’t go through this again.”
You turned on your heel, heading towards the exit. You quickly get pulled back by Niki, whose grip is desperate onto your wrist.
“Don’t go,” he pleaded, “please.”
“Niki, let go of me—”
“I love you.”
Your eyes widen slightly at his abrupt words. Your body loosens, forgetting to resist. Your eyes meet, his touch on your skin tingles.
“What are you saying?” You managed to say, your eyes looking into his for truth.
“I love you, y/n. I never stopped loving you,” he confessed, looking down at you in yearning.
“Don’t do this,” You pleaded, shaking your head softly as tears prickle at the corner of your eyes.
You didn’t know how much you could take, and all of this was just too sudden. Like salt on the wound.
And then, Jay barges through the doors of the rooftop.
“Niki, they need you,” he said, looking back and forth between you both.
You quickly turn away, hiding your teary expression. Before he could say anything, You quickly make your way past Jay and out the doors. As you push your way through the crowd, you feel your heart breaking further and further you walk away from him.
The echoes of the rooftop confrontation lingered long after you left the party. You replayed Niki’s words in your head, over and over, until they became a loop of emotions you couldn’t escape.
For the next few days, you threw yourself into work, avoiding every call, text, and notification. Niki hadn’t reached out directly, but articles about the music video were everywhere, the internet buzzing with speculation about your "chemistry." Fans had pieced together theories and speculations about you both. It was alarming.
When your phone buzzed with a new text from your manager, you hesitated before reading it.
"Director wants you on set tomorrow. Enhypen is doing some last-minute pickups for the video, and they want you in the final scene. Non-negotiable."
You stared at the message, your stomach knotting. Facing Niki again felt impossible, but walking away now would mean letting your emotions derail your hard earned career—a line you weren’t willing to cross.
The final scene was simple: Niki and I standing together, framed by soft lighting, as the camera panned out to symbolize resolution. When you arrived, Niki was already there, surrounded by makeup team. He looked up as you entered, his expression a mix of hesitation and relief.
“Y/n,” he said, standing.
you nodded curtly, keeping your distance, “Let’s just get this over with.”
The director wasted no time, positioning you both side by side under the glow of a massive artificial sunset. The scene required you to face each other, your hands almost touching as if the unspoken tension between you had finally resolved.
“Alright, action!”
you moved into position, your eyes meeting under the soft light. Your breath caught as Niki’s hand hovered close to yours, the warmth of his presence seeping through the small space between you. The scene was supposed to be quiet, but as the camera rolled, Niki broke the silence. His voice was barely audible, meant only for you.
“I meant what I said the other night,” he whispered, his eyes searching yours.
You tensed, your carefully maintained composure cracking.
“Niki…”
“No, listen,” he continued, his voice steady but full of emotion.
“I’ve spent every day since I left regretting it. I thought I was doing what was best for us, but I was a coward. I was afraid of being no one, so I worked tirelessly to debut. I wanted to be someone for you. To get us both out of that small town. But i was too careless and forgot what all of this was for. Who all of this was for… you were the only thing keeping me grounded,” he said.
Tears welled in your eyes, but you couldn’t respond. The director called, “Cut!” but neither of you moved. Niki’s hand finally closed the gap, his fingers brushing yours.
“Please, y/n. Just tell me if there’s still a chance. I’ll fight for it—I’ll fight for us—if you want me to,” he begged, squeezing your hand.
Your throat tightened as his words sank in, “Do you think it’s that easy? That we can just pick up where we left off?”
“No,” he admitted, his voice raw, “But I’ll do whatever it takes to make it right.”
The crew watched you both curiously as you stood there, the tension palpable even off-camera. Finally, you stepped back, breaking the moment.
“I need time,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.
Niki nodded, though the pain in his eyes was evident, “I’ll wait.”
Back in your apartment that night, you sat alone in the dim light of your living room, replaying every word he’d said. Part of you wanted to believe him, to take the leap and trust that you both could find your way back to each other. But another part of you was terrified. Of being hurt again.
Weeks after that, you continued to replay those moments with Niki. Although shooting was wrapped up and the music video was out, you still felt stuck. You hadn’t reached out to him, you hesitated every time, afraid of what could happen if you decide to let him back in. But you knew, deep down, you were running away from what you truly felt.
Love.
You ardently and most irrevocably, loved Niki.
You stared at his name on your phone for the millionth time this month. Your thumb hovering over the call button before you sighed and put the phone down. You just didn’t have the courage to do it. Just as you were about to head to the kitchen for coffee, there was a knock at the door. You froze, your heart racing.
Yes, you just knew.
when you opened the door, there he was. Niki, standing in the hallway, looking like he hadn’t slept. His hair was a mess, his outfit still impeccable, but his eyes—those eyes that always seemed to see through you—were unwavering.
“What are you doing here?” you asked, your voice weaker than you intended.
“I couldn’t leave things like that,” he said, his voice low but steady. “Please, I just needed to see you.”
You hesitated, every part of you screaming to slam the door and protect what was left of your fragile heart. But something in his expression stopped you.
“Five minutes,” you said, stepping aside.
He walked in, his movements careful, as though afraid of pushing you further away. You stayed near the door, arms crossed, your defenses firmly in place.
“I know I hurt you,” he began, his hands clenching at his sides. “And I’ve been trying to figure out the right way to say this, but there isn’t one. I’ve been missing you, missing you like crazy.”
His words hung in the air, heavy with sincerity.
“You don’t know what it was like for me, Niki. Watching you rise, seeing your face everywhere while I was trying to forget—do you have any idea how that felt?”
“I do,” he said softly, “Because I was watching you too. Every movie, every headline—you were everywhere, y/n. And every time, I thought, ‘She’s better off without me.’ But now…”
He paused, his voice breaking slightly, “Now I know I was wrong. I don’t want to just be a memory in your life. I want to be part of it again.”
The vulnerability in his voice shattered something in you.
He took a step closer, his gaze never leaving yours,“let me prove it to you. Whatever it takes, I’ll do it. Just… don’t shut me out, y/n. Not again. I don’t want to lose you when i just got you back.”
“I can’t promise anything,” you said finally.
He holds you by your arms, looking down at you tenderly.
He nodded, a small, hopeful smile tugging at his lips. “That’s enough.”
You both stare at eachother in silence, the tension growing heavier and heavier. Your eyes glance down at his lips and then up at his eyes. And before you both knew it, you were drawing closer and closer to each other.
He kisses you, softly and tenderly. For a second, you’re stunned but quickly close your eyes in relief as you kiss him back. He lets out a soft, relieved, sigh as he moves his hands from your arms to cup your face. He deepened the kiss, savoring every taste of you. He starts to push forward, causing you to move backward until your back hits the wall. The kiss is yearnful, desperate, and so messy. Feelings you didn’t know you had emerged from you. Finally, you both pull away to catch your breath.
“I missed this,” he exhaled, both of your faces just mere inches away.
Both your foreheads rested against each other. You closed your eyes, catching your breath.
“Me too…” your breath hitched as his fingers found their way under your shirt.
He captures your lips once again, slowly yet hungrily. He picks you up, you wrap your legs around his torso and your arms around his neck. He leads you blindly to the bedroom, laying you on top of the bed. He positions himself between your legs as he towers over you, using his arms to support his weight. He doesn’t break the kiss as his hands trail all over your body. Feeling every inch of you, remembering, noting every feature of your trembling body. He breaks the kiss to leave a trail of wet kisses on your neck, his free hand sliding under your shirt. He feels your bare skin under his touch, he grips onto your waist. You let out a shaky exhale.
“Niki…”
"Y/n,” he murmured, his tone a mix of desperation and restraint, “I can’t do this halfway with you. If I continue kissing you—touching you like this—I won’t be able to stop.”
You swallow, hard. After a moment of hesitation, you nod. He captures your lips once again, this time slowly, meaningfully, and passionately. As if he was promising so many things in one kiss. He drags his arm down your legs, slowly pulling down your shorts alongside.
His touch became more insistent as he worshipped you with a fervor that left you breathless. Whispering and groaning sweet names and phrases to you like an alluring consolation. Time seemed to blur as you both gave yourselves over to each other, the years of longing and heartbreak dissolving in the heat of the moment.
For the first time in what felt like forever, you let yourself feel—completely, unapologetically, and without restraint. Niki made you forget everything but him, his touch grounding you while his kisses sent you soaring. And as the night stretched on, the walls you'd so carefully built around your heart began to crumble, leaving nothing but the raw, undeniable truth of what you've both been fighting all along: you were meant to find your way back to each other.
By the time the music awards came, your relationship with Niki had soared. Private, but not secret. For the better of your careers, for now at least.
The thunderous applause echoed through the arena as Enhypen's name lit up the massive screen behind the stage. They had just won the biggest award of the night—Song of the Year. Fans screamed, the cameras panned across the cheering crowd, and the members of Enhypen rose to their feet, hugging each other before heading up to the stage.
You sat in the audience, clapping politely, doing your best to remain composed despite the swell of pride bubbling in your chest. You avoided the cameras, knowing full well they’d zoom in on you if you looked too emotional. Niki caught your eye as he walked by, his smile quick and fleeting, but it was enough to make your heart stutter.
The group gathered on stage, their presence commanding as the arena quieted for their speech. Jungwon took the mic first, thanking their team, their fans, and their families. The other members chimed in, their voices laced with gratitude and joy.
Then the mic was passed to Niki.
“Wow,” he started, his deep voice carrying over the crowd. “This is… unbelievable. I don’t think there’s a word big enough to describe what this moment feels like.”
“I’ve been thinking a lot about this moment,” he continued, his voice steady but laced with something deeper—something vulnerable.
“When we started, we never imagined we’d make it this far. There were so many times we doubted ourselves, so many nights we wondered if we were good enough. But we had each other, and we had you—our fans—to remind us to keep going.”
The crowd roared again, but Niki wasn’t done. His hand tightened on the mic, and his eyes scanned the audience, stopping for a beat when they landed on you. Your breath hitched.
“And there’s one more person I need to thank,” he said, his tone softening.
“Someone who believed in me even before I believed in myself. Someone who’s been an inspiration, a muse, a best friend, and…” He hesitated, a small, almost nervous smile tugging at his lips, “The love of my life.”
Gasps and cheers rippled through the crowd. The cameras swiveled immediately to you, who froze in your seat, your cheeks flushing under the bright lights. Your eyes widen a bit. The crowd cheered lowly at the sight of your beautiful appearance.
Niki's voice grew steadier, more certain, “Y/n, I know this might be the last thing you want right now, but I can’t go up here and pretend you’re not the reason I’ve made it this far. You’ve challenged me, supported me, and even when things were hard, you never stopped being my light.”
“I’ve spent so long trying to prove that I’m worthy of standing next to you. And now, I’m standing here tonight, on this stage, with this award, and I want the world to know that it’s because of you. Thank you, Y/n.”
Tears pricked your eyes as the entire arena seemed to dissolve into chaos. Fans screamed, the cameras fixated on you, and Enhypen's members exchanged wide-eyed looks with one another.
Your gaze locked with Niki's, and despite the noise, the flashing lights, and the million eyes on you both, it felt like you were the only two people in the room.
Niki stepped back from the mic as the crowd continued to roar, his lips curling into a soft smile meant only for you.
You flashed a pretty smile, a chuckle following after. Maybe it was the shock, maybe it was how thoughtful this was, or simply you just loved him so much that nothing else mattered.
The night ended with fans buzzing, headlines exploding, and Enhypen securing their place as not just award winners but as the center of one of the most iconic love declarations in recent history.
More Posts from Rikidaze and Others
I NEED THAT PART TWO EXPEDITIOUSLY
roomies! nishimura riki 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔
₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ texting your cold roommate
genre: crack, fluff pairing: nonchalant!riki x down bad fem!reader tw: none!
masterlist 𖤐.ᐟ might make a part 2 of this ── .✦ here's my perm taglist if you want to be notified!
[ 니키 ] LOVE DIVE ꒰ N.RK x F!READER
![[ 니키 ] LOVE DIVE ꒰ N.RK X F!READER](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e3075118940319529bc5408a270e9758/31f09770dd431d72-4d/s500x750/ece7f4f74f311f7c9a4dc6455c7c798b97242e15.png)
IN WHICH ?! — Y/n often flirts and teases one of her mc partners, nishimura ni-ki (riki). She is taken back when he flirts back while they’re interviewing IVE for their new release, ‘LOVE DIVE’.
genre . . . smau, fluff, friends to lovers, idol!ni-ki, idol!reader pairing … idol!riki x idol!fem!reader
warnings … swearing, my horrible humor, ill occasionally use photos of other idols for y/n, for example shuhua, seulgi + more. photos of hyuna and dawn will be used for ynki posts! oblivious ynki!
featuring … IVE, keeho & jiung of P1HARMONY, sullyoon of NMIXX, yunjin & kazuha of LE SSERAFIM, gp999 contestants, emma song of dance crew WANT, vernon of SEVENTEEN
release date … 05.15.22(og date)
status … completed : 06.30.22
taglist (CLOSED) … @iulrma @jangwonie @i-dubu @strwberrydinosaur
a/n … it was actually so hard trynna find inkigayo clips, so for my sake just pretend ‘the show!’ is on sundays 😭 + this was originally on my old account but i’ve decided to continue it! so for now i’m gonna re post all the other chapters and continue it on here! + pls ignore how the banner says aerzkii (my old account) instead of tzyuki, i was too lazy to change it
![[ 니키 ] LOVE DIVE ꒰ N.RK X F!READER](https://64.media.tumblr.com/08b8986ce313cdc611c4b351c5475abe/31f09770dd431d72-fd/s500x750/b6fe3e7f17c86d88db85a2254f7f7f11842b4a18.jpg)
## PROFILES !! — ACEIZ 🃏… ENHYPEN 🎸 … IVE 🍿 … FRENS 💌 …
001. no time for flirting | written
002. battle of the maknaes
003. the only ten i see
004. f the scandal!
005. sweetest pie
006. attention, please! | written
007. on the main
008. kpop world
009. manager minah deserves a raise
010. KEEHOE?
011. vernon agenda
012. open your eyes
013. YNKI?? REAL?? i wish
014. lovestuck
015. YNNI tracklist
016. blink blink
017. 4eva
018. florida girl
019. keeynki deprived | written
020. the taste of honey outsold
021. crush!
022. border : day one
AND THEY WERE ROOMMATES
ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ a funeral pyre spin-off!
SYNOPSIS ⤏ after niki takes over her old roommate's lease, y/n has a hard time adjusting to the new living arrangement. it's totally not because niki's life goal is to terrorize her or anything.
PARING ⤏ roommate!niki x promiscuous!fem reader
GENRE ⤏ smau, rom-com, enemies to lovers, college au
FEATURING ⤏ heeseung, sunghoon, sunoo, jungwon and niki from enhypen, anton from riize, wonyoung from ive, gunwook from zb1, danielle from newjeans
FACECLAIM ⤏ faceclaim for y/n purely for picture purposes!! (@ loveyeno on ig)
WARNINGS ⤏ swearing, kms/kys & nsfw jokes, mentions of hook-ups and multiple partners, pls ignore timestamps 💔
PLAYLIST ⤏ boyfriend, ariana grande | let's be friends, emily osment | me and your mama, childish gambino | champagne & sunshine, plvtinum | one more night, maroon 5 | eyes don't line, isabel larosa | die for me, chase atlantic | positions, ariana grande | r u mine, artic monkeys | hit my line, plvtinum
STARTED ⤏ 12.xx.2024
STATUS ⤏ coming soon ♡ gonna start sometime next week
PROFILES & CHAPTERS
mean girls | niki & co.
001. roommate duties
002. where. tf. is my oat milk
𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 – 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓
⤥ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
⤥ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬!𝐀𝐔
⤥ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐣𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬, 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐛𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐛𝐯𝐬𝐞, 𝐭𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐲𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬, 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞/𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐬
⤥ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐀 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞, 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬. 𝐀 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐧 𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐲'𝐬 𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐤.
⤥ 𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬: 𝐄𝐍𝐇𝐘𝐏𝐄𝐍, 𝐍𝐂𝐓'𝐬 𝐉𝐚𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧, 𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐄'𝐬 𝐓𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢, 𝐅𝐈𝐅𝐓𝐘 𝐅𝐈𝐅𝐓𝐘'𝐬 𝐊𝐞𝐞𝐧𝐚
⤥ 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 | 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐒: 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐃
⤥ 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓: 𝐉𝐀𝐍𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐘 𝟓𝐓𝐇, 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 | 𝐄𝐍𝐃: 𝐀𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐋 𝟏𝟑𝐭𝐡, 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒
⤥ 𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐅𝐘 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓
⤥ 𝐏𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐁𝐎𝐀𝐑𝐃
⤥ 𝐀/𝐍: 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐧𝐚𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐩 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬!
⤥ 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐒
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐍𝐄: 𝐛𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐎: 𝐬𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐟𝐥𝐚𝐤𝐞
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄: "𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐬"
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑: 𝐝𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄: 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐩𝐡𝐚
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐈𝐗: 𝐣𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐲
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍: 𝐩𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐲
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓: 𝐩𝐢𝐭𝐲
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄: 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐰 (𝟖.𝟕𝐤)
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐄𝐍: 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐡
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍: 𝐜𝐫𝐲 𝐦𝐞 𝐚 𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐕𝐄: 𝐫𝐢𝐤𝐢 𝐢𝐧 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍: 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞 (𝟐.𝟕𝐤)
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍: 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬 𝐜𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐨𝐨
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐩𝐢𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐡
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍: ...𝐨𝐡 𝐡𝐞'𝐬 𝐛𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍: 𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 ❤️
⤥ 𝐏𝐑𝐄-𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑: 𝐛𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍: 𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐲 (𝟕.𝟗𝐤)
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐞𝐧 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘: 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐬𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘𝐎𝐍𝐄: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐝𝐠𝐚𝐟 𝐰𝐚𝐫
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘𝐖𝐎: 𝐚𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐞𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄: 𝟏𝟎/𝟏𝟎 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐝
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑: 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 (𝟗.𝟕𝐤)
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄: 𝐭𝐨𝐤𝐲𝐨
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘𝐒𝐈𝐗: 𝐬𝐢𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐞𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍: 𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐫𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥!!!
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓: 𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐥, 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄: 𝐫𝐚𝐰
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘: 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐧 (𝟖.𝟐𝐤)
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐎𝐍𝐄: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐞
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐓𝐖𝐎: 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐘𝐓𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄: 𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐭
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑: 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄: 𝐓𝐌𝐈?
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐒𝐈𝐗: 𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍: 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬
⤥ 𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑: 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫
⤥ 𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑: 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 (𝟕𝐤)
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐡
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘: 𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐎𝐍𝐄: 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐓𝐖𝐎: 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄: 𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐁𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐔𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍????
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑: 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄: 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐫𝐢𝐤𝐢 𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐒𝐈𝐗: 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐮𝐦𝐚 𝐩𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍: 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐜
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓: 𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐲 𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐞
⤥ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄: 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰
⤥ 𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐔𝐄
𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒: 𝐨𝐧𝐞 | 𝐭𝐰𝐨 | 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞 | 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫 | 𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞
loveeee 🎀
SOULMATE ‘❗️’ TRACKER — n. rk.
SCAMMERS… TRACKERS NEED TO LOVE TOO BUT NEVER SCAM ABOUT SOULMATES, YOUR SOULMATE COULD BE A VICTIM
・❥・After one lesson in soulmate mythology, you couldn’t help but figure out who your soulmate is. You’ve read books and articles yet you couldn’t find the love of your life. You nearly gave up until you encountered a business called “Soulmate Tracker.” You wasted all your money on this business and to your surprise, your soulmate was the one person you never wished for.
CHECK OUT … soulmate dilemma !
PAIRING ➸ enemy!niki x fem!reader
GENRE ➸ smau, crack, fluff, highschool au, soulmate au, enemies 2 lovers
WARNINGS ➸ profanity & scamming; each chapter has its warning
FEATURING ➸ enhypen eunchae of lesserafim liz of ive theo of p1harmony
NOTE ➸ THIS SMAU IS PURE FICTION, ALL THE IDOLS MENTIONED IN THIS DO NOT REFLECT WITH THEIR ACTUAL LIFE AND CAREER. THIS IS A NON-IDOL ALTERNATIVE UNIVERSE
STATUS ➸ completed
↳ START ➸ 11/27/22
↳ END ➸ 03/02/23
AUTHORS NOTE ➸ omfg i’m finally making a fanfic for the loml. i felt like making an e2l enha smau so here i am. pls support this fic and enjoy !! (i always wanted to make an e2ls and there arent much niki e2l smaus) SONA SPEAKING !! (PLEASE READ) i changed my url but im afraid i can’t update the links bc tumblr isn’t letting me 😞 i will let u guys know that i update the links once tumblr lets me but for now please read st through the tags and hope that i’ll change the links soon :) thank you <3
TAGLIST ➸ taglist is closed thank you for the support !
☆ playlist — « unbelievable like tv ; a world of you and me »
PLEASE DO NOT SPAM LIKE :) SPAM REBLOGS = OK! ; SPAM LIKE = BLOCK!
PROFILES ➸ relationship status: single❗️soulmate scammers
STEP 01 — soulmate wya
STEP 02 — destiny
STEP 03 — unprofessional fr
STEP 04 — tf does that mean
STEP 05 — screaming rn
STEP 06 — biddy buddy
STEP 07 — furry allegations
STEP 08 — no social skills = no soulmate
STEP 09 — insert oh my reference
STEP 10 — not funny, did not laugh
STEP 11 — isn’t that…illegal?? 😨
STEP 12 — wanna know something cool
STEP 13 — jaw dropping rn
STEP 14 — evil laughs
STEP 15 — strings attached
STEP 16 — prayed for my downfall
STEP 17 — hands in head
STEP 18 — government name
STEP 19 — heeseung ftw
STEP 20 — soulmate tracker 2.0
STEP 21 — giggling my toes off
STEP 22 — HEESEUNG MOVE
STEP 23 — shitting my pants
STEP 24 — #firstdate #hearteyes
STEP 25 — jump if u enjoy my pain
STEP 26 — i sorry very
STEP 27 — painful to watch
STEP 28 — character development
STEP 29 — scammer x victim
LAST STEP — ummm what 🙈
enhypen masterlist
a project and a guitar — yang jungwon.
ꏍ jungwon is just a boy who plays guitar for fun and that can't stop himself from looking at you in class, he never thought of talking to you even if he had the biggest crush in the whole world, but what happens when a project forces him to make a move on you?
pairing. guitar boy!jungwon x f!reader
genre. smau + written chapters, highschool!au, fluff, slight angst, strangers to lovers, kinda slow burn, love triangle (?) but not really.
warning(s). suggestive jokes, swearing. ignore time stamps pls.
feat. ive, itzy, txt.
status. completed!
note. this is my first smau and i'm convinced that i'm not funny so maybe theres not gonna be that much of humor !!
taglist. open! send an ask or comment to be added. @soobnny @yizhoutv @ja4hyvn @heejaies @amakumos @jalnandanz
profiles 1 | profiles 2
ch. 1 "weirdo"
ch. 2 "jungwon simp era ??"
ch. 3 "live love laugh"
ch. 4 "comforting" (wc. 0.7k)
ch. 5 "hellaur baby gorl"
ch. 6 "keep that shit to yourself"
ch. 7 "no more girlbossing"
ch. 8 "L + ratio" (wc. 0.6k)
ch. 9 "spidey sense"
ch. 10 "go for her alpha"
ch. 11 "what the fuck ??" (wc. 0.2k)
ch. 12 "i love myself too"
ch. 13 "i support depression"
ch. 14 "jungwon first win"
ch. 15 "bomb" (wc. 0.2k)
ch. 16 "i'm not playin"
ch. 17 "awkward"
ch. 18 "why me"
ch. 19 "me (an empath)"
ch. 20 "confusing me"
ch. 21 "please"
ch. 22 "his warmth" (wc. 0.7k)
ch. 23 "aint no way"
ch. 24 "holding hands"
ch. 25 "you free tomorrow?"
ch. 26 "and then 1 hour" (wc. 0.4k)
ch. 27 "or never really"
ch. 28 "i forgor"
ch. 29 "we're the best"
ch. 30 "can i kiss you again?" (wc. 2.0k)
ch. 30.5 "her guitar boy"
FIXED COMFORT | SUNGHOON
SUMMARY: typically, sunghoon’s the one who takes care of you when you’ve had one too many. but once in a blue moon, he lets his guard down and allows you to care for him the way he does for you.
or, the one where sunghoon’s drunk at a bar and misses his girlfriend a little too much.
NOTES: idk I just feel like someone should let him sleep for six months straight!!!
PAIRING: sunghoon x fem!reader
WORD COUNT: 4.4K (4444 exactly—she’s a shortie).
WARNINGS: fluff on fluff on fluff.
***
“Hey, do you think you could come get Sunghoon from the bar? He’s been asking for you for the past hour.”
Jay’s phone call pulls you out from a deep slumber on a Saturday night that falls on a day with no plans other than pure relaxation. Sunghoon had been preoccupied with work and classes this past week and wanted to unwind by drinking at his favorite bar with his closest friends and all you wanted to do was sleep the weekend away.
Since the two of you started dating six months ago after being friends for a little over two years, you both agree on the notion that you’ve found a good balance between time spent together and apart respectively. Nothing fundamentally changed with the exception of kissing and touching one another in the way a couple would. He still respects your independence and you respect his time away from you as well.
Sunghoon learned quickly that you’re the type of person who values your alone time more than anything else. When he first started developing feelings for you, grappling with your absence wasn’t easy. He initially thought you weren’t interested in getting to know him the way he was with you because you weren’t afraid to decline invitations and telling people ‘no.’ Slowly, over the course of many months of pining and late night conversations, did Sunghoon learn that you’re typically your best self after a moment of isolation.
Your boyfriend is somewhere in between an introvert and extrovert. He tends to be shy when he meets people he isn’t familiar with while his loud, rambunctious attitude is typically reserved for those who know him best. He likes to keep to himself for the most part, giving some of his personality away when he feels his walls start to crumble naturally. You love that he has a good head on his shoulders and that he’s able to tell you about his feelings while maintaining an air of confidence. He doesn’t inherently need anybody; he likes your company and will do anything to keep it.
Moments like this are when your heart feels softer for Sunghoon than when the two of you were just friends.
“I know you wanted to spend the weekend alone but Hoon’s been saying your name all night,” Jay says. “I’m sorry for waking you up.”
“No, it’s fine.” You’re sure Jay can hear your brittle voice. “Are you guys at the bar near your place?”
“That’s the one. Thanks again and I’m really sorry for waking you up.”
“Don’t sweat it. Cook me something next week if you still feel bad.”
“I can do that. Chili oil noodles with shrimp sound good?”
“It’s almost like you know me.” He laughs at your sarcasm.
“Drive safe.”
When Jay hangs up, you allow yourself a few minutes to adjust and wake up, stretching your body from the warm comfort of your blankets. You change out of Sunghoon’s shirt to put on pajama pants and another one of his stolen shirts, opting not to take a jacket since you figure you won’t be out for very long.
You thank your past self for filling up your gas tank before tonight after having put it off for a few days. Knowing Sunghoon, he would still scold you for allowing yourself to run nearly empty before filling it up even if he was inebriated. Somehow, knowing this about him brings a smile to your face.
Sunghoon’s the kind of guy who likes to have some control over certain things. He likes order and structure, often waking up at the same hour every weekday to build a routine his body can remember. He’s been like that since you first met him but you think it’s part of his charm. Even from two years ago, when you met him through Jake Sim, Sunghoon has maintained a level of confidence and control that he does now. On the heels of an impressive skating career before pivoting to focus on higher education, Sunghoon had his preferences and will stick by them.
His discipline is the first thing you noticed when you met him for the first time. Jay, someone you were already familiar with, agreed to cook dinner with your friend group under the condition that everyone helped him shop and chip in for the meal. Sunghoon held Jake back from buying unnecessary things like boxed chocolate milk and candy because Jay had desserts back at his place. He held a checklist of items whereas the rest of your friends ran up and down the aisles without thinking much about what needed to be purchased.
Sunghoon’s near-meticulous behavior is juxtaposed to your chaotic and rambunctious nature. You often follow your gut instead of setting a solid plan because you’re not concerned with meeting deadlines, sans education. Whereas you tend to lean towards a go-with-the-flow attitude, Sunghoon is the opposite. But that’s something he loves about you.
At a surface level distinction, it didn’t seem like the two of you would get along as well as you did. It surprised Jake when Sunghoon asked for your number so he could text you about seeing a comedy film with him as no one else in the group wanted to see it. Including you at an impromptu study session with him (Sunghoon was organized and neat while your pens were spread all over and your study methods, haphazard) felt like watching two people clash.
Rather, you and Sunghoon complement one another.
The idea of letting himself go with someone who wasn’t part of his friend collective was unheard of. Getting to know a girl who didn’t share similar lifestyles didn’t appeal to him before meeting you, and you’re inarguably the most chaotic person Sunghoon knows. But he finds that there’s order within your chaos—you know who you are and what you want, and you will not compromise yourself just to please other people.
It’s what Sunghoon loves the most about you. There’s a boundary you never let anyone cross under the assumption that your own safety net feels compromised. He’s watched you lose friends for this same reason and has always admired the way you carry yourself like you know you deserve better than people who disrespect you. He’s witnessed the grace you maintain when people who call you a friend voice words of kindness but speak ill about you behind your back. If anything, Sunghoon feels pity for anyone who crosses you to the point of anger. To be envious of another’s confidence is one thing. To make that known is another.
Sunghoon learns that you let your inhibitions go because holding control over yourself feels like a burden. It feels like setting a standard you will never be able to meet. He never thought of order in that way before getting to know you. Your approach to life sparked a new wave of emotions within him to the point where he was open and willing to let you farther into his life.
His days were ruled by guidelines he had to maintain and proper etiquette that followed him even off the rink. The poise he carried from his career on the ice bled into his personal life too. Although, he doesn’t mind that it does. Sunghoon values any form of structure because it makes him feel like he has a purpose and that there’s something to be accomplished at the end of the day.
Most times, Sunghoon’s feels like people judge him for his regimen and can’t fathom why he appreciates control so much. They tell him to let loose and enjoy his time away from his career. People always think he simply doesn’t know how to have fun because he’s set in his ways and won’t let other people coax him into doing something he’s not comfortable with. But not you. Sunghoon has never felt like you‘ve judged how he chooses to live his life.
Before he knew it, a year had passed and he started to call you one of his best friends. The friendship was gradual. Sunghoon didn’t have many close female friends in the way he does with Heeseung, Jay, and Jake. You’re the first person since ending his career who hasn’t tried to pry into the why. In fact, Sunghoon enjoys that you didn’t bring it up.
(You did, in the form of cooing over his younger self skating in competitions for the first time or roasting all of the outfits he had to wear. But somehow, all of your jabs made him feel happier than when people complimented his performance.)
Eventually, being around you felt too right. He loved it when you took naps on his bed and felt comfortable raiding your kitchen pantry without permission. Sunghoon could leave you in his apartment without him being in it and feel at ease. In fact, he started to look forward to coming home to you. All it took was seeing you wear his hoodie because you got too cold and forgot your jacket, to make him drop his bag by the front door and ask you to be his girlfriend. He hasn’t regretted anything with you since.
The weather is cold outside since it’s approaching the middle of autumn. You let your car warm up and blast the heat all the way up while adjusting your defrosting settings before heading to the bar to pick up Sunghoon. You sift through your playlists and settle on soft indie melodies before you drive away from the curb.
You’ve never seen Sunghoon get drunk to the point of needing extra help. Usually, you’re the one who goes a little too hard whenever Heeseung brings out the alcohol or if Jake offers an edible or two. Sunghoon likes to sit back and stay sober (or sober up by the end of the night) when he notices you having too much fun. He doesn’t mind, though. Sunghoon likes taking care of you because sometimes it gives him purpose. You’ve never understood that sentiment but to each their own.
The only times you’ve seen him completely wasted are usually when you’re equally as gone, like on your first road trip as a couple. The five of you rented a lakehouse a few hours from Seoul and spent an entire weekend basking under the hot sun and chose to forget about university stress before finals would inevitably kick everyone’s ass. All five of you were cross-faded (but not without Jay and Sunghoon both prepping water bottles and snacks for when the munchies would hit prior to taking anything). You watched Sunghoon relax to the point where he was much quieter than he normally was and when you asked if he was doing alright, he looked you in the eye and told you he loved you for the first time.
I always have, I think, he said as he brought your hand to his chest. You might not believe me because neither of us are sober but I swear I’ll tell you in the morning.
Sunghoon gets affectionate when he’s drunk or high, often to the point of asking for reassurance. The rational side of his brain is temporarily disfigured. You don’t mind being there to tell him that he’s the love of your life and you’d never go anywhere when he gets like this. Although, you’re usually just as gone and gush all of your hidden emotionally-charged feelings, which pair well with Sunghoon’s need for validation sometimes.
Your friends love your relationship. They don’t think it’s too much or too little, going so far as to take photos of the two of you when you aren’t looking. Some are funny like the pictures of you sleeping on his chest with drool pooling out of your mouth. Others are romantic and whimsical, like the pictures of Sunghoon looking at you like you’re the sunshine to his moonlight. They can’t get enough of you two. Your friends love knowing people they care about are deeply in love with one another and your relationship is somewhat of a reminder that true romance does exist.
Thinking about this makes your heart swell as you park your car and tuck your keys inside your purse. The bouncer checks your ID and lets you inside the bar, and you already spot Jay off to the side.
“Thanks for coming,” he says as he gives you a loose hug. “And sorry for waking you up.”
You wave him off. “It’s fine. I’ve probably woken you up for worse.”
“Yeah, like the time you and Jake wanted ramen at 3am and wouldn’t stop calling me because both of you got a little too high.”
“Can you blame us?! You were like, two blocks away.”
“Yeah, but did you need to eat with me?”
“Duh. You’re like, the best person to eat a late night dinner with.”
The two of you laugh as he leads you to the group. You see Sunghoon slumped over the table with his head in his arms and the rest of your friend group tries really hard not to seem too excited when they see you standing next to Jay.
“Fucking finally.” Heeseung stands and gives you a quick side hug before Jake does the same. “Love you guys and all but he started to become unbearable when he kept showing us photos of you.”
Jake snorts. “Poor guy was almost about to cry.” That makes your heart soft.
“He looks so cute,” you coo, tilting your head to savor this moment. It’s abnormal for you to be the sober one but you’re starting to understand why Sunghoon doesn’t mind taking care of you when you’re like this.
Jay comes to stand next to you. “He’s not cute when he drank half his weight in alcohol and wouldn’t shut up about how pretty your hair is.”
“What, do you don’t think my hair’s pretty?” The messy, unbrushed hair is enough to make the guys laugh.
“Nah seriously, thanks for coming,” says Jake. “We felt bad calling you but he refuses to get out of his seat.”
“It’s fine.” You wave him off and step closer to your boyfriend, who still hasn’t moved from his position.
“Do your thing and we’ll be here if you need help bringing him to the car.” Heeseung smiles gratefully at you.
Even the back of Sunghoon’s head is unfairly gorgeous. His hair always looks nice, although you credit that to his younger sister introducing him to a world of hair care products during his skating years. It feels soft to the touch as you stroke the back of his head until Sunghoon slowly comes to. You feel his body start to stir.
“Baby,” you say quietly, bending down until you’re next to him. “Wake up for me.”
“Hm?” Sunghoon mumbles from his arms. He feels the sensation of your fingers carding through his hair and pulls himself from the table, wiping the spit from the corner of his mouth before realizing you’re standing next to him. “Y/N?”
“I’m right here.”
He pulls his head up until he’s sitting upright in the booth, squinting up at you to adjust to the bar lights that disappeared when he closed his eyes. Your boyfriend looks so innocent like this. He looks at you with a wide, round gaze as if you’d appeared out of thin air and he’s trying his hardest to figure out how you’re standing in front of him.
“Is it really you?” Sunghoon asks in a quiet voice. His tone makes your heart flutter and you reach your arms out until you’re cupping his jaw and rubbing the pads of your thumbs over his cheeks. Sunghoon melts into your touch and you feel his body start to relax. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too, bug. Did you have fun tonight?”
He nods in your hands, “Mhm. Just tired now.”
“Jay said you were asking for me.”
“I always ask for you.” Your cheeks heat up and you try to ignore the snickers from behind you.
“Why don’t we go back to my place, yeah? You can sleep in my bed instead of this bar.”
“Can we? I love the guys but I just missed you.”
“Simp,” Heeseung whispers before coughing into his fist.
Sunghoon stands from the booth once you’ve taken a step back to give him the space to move. He’s surprisingly able to stand on his own and clutches onto his jacket as he makes his way to the door.
“Sorry guys,” he mutters to the guys.
“Yah, it’s fine,” Jay says as he waves Sunghoon off.
“Get home safe,” Heeseung says as he opens the door for the two of you. Sunghoon waves behind him until you guide him to the car.
“Can you put your jacket on for me?” You catch it in your hands after he nearly let them fall from his grasp.
“Shit, sorry.” You watch Sunghoon put on one arm and then the other. He looks so childlike in this moment as he concentrates his hardest to put the jacket on without stumbling.
It reminds you that he doesn’t show you this side of him often. Sunghoon, ever the poised individual who likes to know what’s ahead of him, has let his inhibitions down. Seeing his figure slowly push his body through the warm fabric has you biting back a smile.
“Need help?”
Sunghoon looks down at his hands that are trying to zip his jacket up to no avail. He feels like his hands are too big and the zipper is too small. “Please.”
Your steady fingers cover Sunghoon’s and take over the tedious task. The metal is warm from his fingertips. You can feel him looking down at you and you temporarily fumble with the zipper, which makes him laugh.
“Silly,” he mutters. “Ah, fuck. I don’t know if I can open the door.”
You roll your eyes and open it for him. “You’re funny.”
He slides into the seat as gracefully as he can without hitting his head on the roof. Sunghoon struggles, but manages to buckle himself in and grins up at you when he hears the click of the buckle. When you look down on him, the lamp post from above casts a soft glow on his face. He looks so youthful at this moment. Sunghoon has let go of his thoughts and couldn’t think about anything but the present moment even if he tried.
He waits for you and mumbles about how cold it is when you turn the engine on. The warm air starts to uplift his spirits and he looks at you with us head pressed to the headrest.
“I’m sorry you have to see me like this.”
“What?” you ask. “Why?”
He shrugs. “Dunno. Usually I’m the one taking care of you.”
“You don’t always have to be brave, you know.”
Sunghoon doesn’t say anything. He reaches out to envelope your hand in his and squeezes it until he’s holding it loosely in the quiet of the evening.
“I love you.”
Your heart blooms. “I love you right back.” He seems satisfied with your response and lets go of your hand so that you can drive back to your apartment.
When you park on the curb, Sunghoon’s sober enough to unbuckle his seatbelt and wait for you to turn the engine off before opening his door carefully. He steps outside and leans back on the car door until you walk around the hood of the vehicle and grabs your hands to pull you into him.
You feel his lips on your before you register what’s happening. He tastes faintly of pineapple soju and beer, and his mouth is warm. Despite his inebriated state, Sunghoon’s able to hold you between his hands as he moves to place them on your hips to balance your body after you’ve stumbled into him.
The kiss itself is slow. In fact, it feels as though Sunghoon has slowed time around so that the two of you could enjoy the late night kiss uninterrupted. You can barely hear anything besides the ringing in your ears after being caught by surprise due to your boyfriend’s abrupt movements. Your mouths move in slow tandem and Sunghoon nearly pushes his tongue inside your mouth before pulling away to rest his forehead against your own.
“My baby,” he whispers against your lips before giving you another quick peck.
“You are so cute.” You blurt out this confession like you’re still pining after him. “Let’s go inside, yeah?”
The apartment is warm compared to the environment outside and Sunghoon slips off his shoes in favor of wearing his designated slippers. He doesn’t let go of your hand the entire time he does so, letting you pull him into the hallway until the two of you reach your bedroom. The hardwood floors feel better than the uneven pavement from outside.
He loves it here. It’s a sanctuary away from his apartment with the friends he will probably invite to his wedding. But something about your green comforter and hand-painted artwork adorning your walls makes Sunghoon feel like he would live by your side for the rest of his life. The scent of your room–warm peaches and vanilla–tugs at his heart strings. This is where he belongs.
Likewise, you love seeing Sunghoon behave like this. It’s not commonplace for him to let people take care of him in the way you are now. He’s used to people looking out for his career and best interest but he struggles with allowing others to handle him with such care. After a decade of enduring harsh criticism and physical endurance, Sunghoon struggles to relax and allow others to take the reins. It’s partially why he loves taking care of you. Being able to provide that kind of love and support makes him feel wanted and needed, even if you tell him he’s more than enough a thousand times over.
You leave him in your room to change his clothes taken from his designated drawer while you prepare skincare and the works. You hear him shuffle outside and fall onto the bed once, prompting you to hold your laughter in as you wash your hands and pull out hair clips for him to use.
“I can’t lie,” Sunghoon says as you emerge from the bathroom to see him in a big t-shirt and pajama bottoms, “I’m really looking forward to you doing my skincare.”
You snicker and pull your desk chair into the bathroom. “Now you know exactly how I feel every time I beg you to do mine when I’m drunk. Sit and close your eyes, please.”
He follows your instructions and leans his back against the furniture. Sunghoon doesn’t fuss when you pin his hair back until it’s secure and allows you to make him feel pampered in a way he typically wouldn’t.
“Did you have fun tonight?”
Sunghoon hums. “Yeah, I did. The guys picked me up from my place and we had lunch at that seafood spot we’ve been meaning to try.”
“Was it any good?”
“So good.” He licks his lips. “God, I’m still thinking about that shellfish soup. We ordered enough food to feed a village but it was so worth it. I wanna go with you.”
“We can go wherever you want.” He smiles at your soft tone.
“We also went to the beach and met some guys at the skate park by the highway. They were pretty nice and let us use their boards for a little. Heeseung got along with them the best, I think.”
“Heeseung makes friends with everybody.”
“He says he’s not social but that’s a lie.” Sunghoon twitches his nose when he feels a damp washcloth on his face. “We went to the bar afterwards and split it by round. I got the first and honestly, I don’t remember much after that.”
“How are you feeling now, though?” you ask as you finish patting his skin dry. “Do you still feel dizzy?” Sunghoon opens his eyes and watches you apply a serum before dabbing it all over his face.
“Not as much as before. I think I’m just tired.”
“And clingy, apparently.”
Sunghoon smacks the back of your thighs. “Shut up. You love it.” You silence him by kissing his nose.
While he brushes his teeth, you situate yourself underneath your plush covers and allow the weight of the blanket to fall on top of you. The sweet promise of a good night’s rest feels imminent, especially when you see your boyfriend emerge from the bathroom. He turns off the light and walks towards the empty side of the bed before he’s slipping himself beside you.
Sunghoon’s an equal opportunist when it comes to sleeping positions. He loves it the most when your head is on his chest and when your arms are tangled in one another because he likes knowing that the two of you yearn for each other equally. But when he gets like this, Sunghoon takes initiative to maneuver himself until half of his chest and head are on top of you. He situates his arm around your waist and pulls himself closer to your body until a deep, satisfied sigh comes from the back of his throat.
He hums in appreciation when your fingers begin to massage his scalp. Sunghoon’s hair is soft and silky and on most days, you’re the only person who gets to touch it. The slowness of your movements paired with the soft kiss you place on his temple makes his eyelids feel heavy.
“Sorry you had to come pick me up,” Sunghoon mumbles against you. “I know we agreed to give each other some space this weekend.”
“You should know by now that I’d do anything for you.” He feels you kiss the crown of his head. “Plus, we both know you’d do the same for me.”
Sunghoon nods. “I would. You’re my girlfriend. Duh.” His sleepy nonsense makes you laugh.
“You can go back to hanging out with the guys tomorrow if you want.” He shakes his head.
“I want to get breakfast with you.” Sunghoon finds your free hand and presses a sleepy kiss to the back of it.
“Whatever you want. We can get breakfast.”
“If we wake up early enough.”
You laugh again. “Yes, if we wake up early enough.”
Sunghoon mumbles a few incoherent words that you can’t quite make out because of your own tiredness. When your own eyes start to droop, Sunghoon feels your fingers start to falter and looks up at you to see you’ve fallen fast asleep.
He kisses the underside of your chin and falls asleep too.
***
comments and reblogs are appreciated! x
oh to be with sunghoon <3
BUCKET LIST
// park sunghoon //
pairing: best friend’s brother!sunghoon x femreader
word count- 8.7k
genre/cw- fluff, angst, forbidden love(?), slow burn(ish), 1 year age difference, realization of feelings, reader fell first but sunghoon fell harder, first kiss, kissing, confessions, profanity, reader gets hurt (not severely)
summary- Sunghoon falling for his sister’s best friend was not on his bucket list
________________________________________________________
You hated (loved) your best friend’s older brother Park Sunghoon, not because of his actual being but rather because of his stupid bucket list that he made when he was six years old that he’s nonstop flaunted for years on end.
He never seemed to shut up about completing his bucket list for as long as you’ve known him and been best friends with his younger sister. You were starting to get tired of hearing his rambles about it, you’ve considered burning it to ashes but you knew you would never be forgiven so that option was ruled out.
So now you were stuck listening to his stories of his completion on whatever number he was at on his bucket list. You don’t know how many times you’ve listend to his stories over the little timespan of winter break up until new years eve.
What you do know is that you were going to be in for another rough year.
You met your best friend at a very young age but even at that age you knew the both of you would be best friends for the rest of your lives.
You weren’t wrong, many years passed and you both were still as close as ever. But when you were younger, you didn’t realize your best friend came with a package, in the form of her older brother Park Sunghoon.
When you first met Sunghoon, your heart swelled. He hated wearing his glasses especially in front of people but you absolutely adored the way he looked in them.
You found yourself admiring Sunghoon whenever you could, whether it was when he tagged along with you and his sister or simply greeting him whenever you came over to their house.
For a good two and a half years you thought your admiration for Sunghoon was a case of one-sided true love. You didn’t know any better but to you that was the best form of love, it meant you were able to admire him.
But no matter how long he has known you, Sunghoon never looked at you in any other way other than his younger sister’s best friend and thats how he’s always seen you as, even up until this day.
“Sunghoon stop boring her with your story on how you went rock climbing in the snow” Your best friend came to your rescue when she realized you were taking a while to return back to her room only to find out you were caught up by her older brother
“My savior” You muttered before getting up from the chair and dusting your clothes off acting like you’ve there for decades
“Oh come on it wasn’t that bad, she was actually asking me questions about how it went” Sunghoon tried to defend himself from the claim his sister put on him
Your best friend looked at you and you shook your head, you heard Sunghoon gasp, noticing you were lying. He called you out on it but you acted oblivious.
You were asking him questions just like how you always do but that’s something you would never admit. For some reason a part of you still lingered around the thought of Sunghoon that was suppressed deep in your heart and mind.
You would indulge in those desires only a few times, you just wanted to satisfy the craving you longed for.
“Well if you don’t mind me, I’m going to save my best friend from you” His sister began to drag you away back to her room, you turned to face Sunghoon’s bewildered expression
You softly giggled to yourself which somehow went unnoticed by your best friend but not Sunghoon. He glared at you and you only stuck you tongue out in a childish manner. It was a habit you picked up whenever you walked away victorious in not getting caught of indulging your desires.
You knew Sunghoon would be back with more stories about his bucket list and as much as you couldn’t take to hear him always talk about it, you somehow found comfort in listening to his stories.
“Sunghoon’s forcing me to go ice skating with him” Your best friend groan shaking her head, you winced hearing she fell victim to her brother’s wish list
“Good luck dealing with him, I know you won’t be returning until midnight” Your words caused her to groan even louder, she was praying endless nothings into the universe that could get her out of going with her brother
And it seemed the universe heard your best friend’s prayer because she called you that very morning she had to go out with her brother to celebrate that she was sick.
But that celebration didn’t last long because a few hours after, you got a simple message from her deeply apologizing for what she has done.
Before you could even register what she was saying, you heard your doorbell. You were confused, you weren’t expecting anyone today.
When you opened your front door, you immediately shut the door but a hand pushed against it to stop your efforts in closing the door.
Now you understood why your best friend apologized. Park Sunghoon stood in front of your door, holding his own pair of ice skates.
“Go get ready” Sunghoon walked into your house as if he lived there and plopped himself onto your couch, your parents happily greeted him to which he returned
You stared outside seemingly dumbfounded. Your best friend had thrown you under the bus and made you replace her in Sunghoon’s billionth check mark on his bucket list.
You swore to make her pay.
Sunghoon was a good driver so you expected him to be a good host too. If he went through all the trouble of picking you up, waiting for you to just drive over an hour and a half just to have you both skate at the famous ice rink within the area, you expected some type of entertainment to kill the time.
Yet, the car was filled with an awkward silence. No music playing and the only form of sound was the two of you’s breathing and of passing cars. You made sure to send your best friend some ‘friendly’ messages for doing this to you.
You sighed as you looked out the window. You pressed your head up the window and it left out a ‘thud’ but you didn’t care anymore, you hope it showed Sunghoon your boredom.
“You can play some music” His voice spoke out and you lifted your head to look at him, it may not have been much but it felt like millions
You immediately turned on his radio and you flipped through the channels. After countless times of scrolling, you didn’t find a single radio station that would be enjoyable for the two of you.
You gave up and turned off his radio before slumping back into the passenger seat. You just expected to lose your mind today.
“You can connect to the bluetooth” You felt a spark of hope at the alternative Sunghoon allowed
You grabbed your phone and immediately connected to the bluetooth. When you heard the first song on your playlist, you hummed happily and fell back onto the seat. You were satisfied to hear one of your favorite songs playing through the speakers.
When the next song played, you recognize the melody right away, it was The Weeknd’s song “Die For You”. You started to softly hum the song’s melody and drop a few of lyrics in the mix of the humming.
You looked out the window again, much more satisfied now that music was playing. You stopped humming when the chorus was coming wanting to submerged yourself into it.
But when you heard Sunghoon’s mumbling and singing some of the lyrics, you turned your head to see Sunghoon lightly tapping the steering wheel to follow the beat of the song. You didn’t expect him to know a song like this, you would always heard him listening to much softer and mellower songs, so this definitely caught you by surprise.
You found yourself admiring him again and it was so hard to peel your gaze away from him and back out the window as you let out a nervous gulp. You were too focused on being forced to complete one of Sunghoon’s checkmarks on his bucket list that you didn’t realize, this would be one of the few times you spent time with Sunghoon alone.
You didn’t realize what you had gotten yourself into and your best friend most certainly didn’t know what she has done.
“No Sunghoon, you’re insane” You arrived at the hour and a half ice skating rink and you could tell why it was so famous, it was huge and had all kinds of activities for all people to join
And this obviously caught the eye of the ice skater within Sunghoon. He wanted to drag you into a competition where the top three places are able to receive exclusive top gifts. You on the hand scoffed, you couldn’t believe Sunghoon actually thought you would join him in this.
Now you may have went against your word, you wondered just how he was able to convince you to join. But now you stood on the ice next to Sunghoon next to other participants, you could feel yourself slipping at times but you managed to catch yourself before tumbling straight to the ice.
This was going to be a long day.
You and Sunghoon’s team were one of the last two surviving. The last activity in order to determine who will win first place would be a race, one person would have skate to the midpoint where their partners will be waiting for them to be given the the baton and end the race.
Obviously, Sunghoon would be the one to skate to the midpoint leaving you to finish and win the race, there was definitely no pressure on you at all.
When the whistle blew, the first skaters were off. You watched as Sunghoon skated ever so effortlessly on the ice. You remember when you first watched Sunghoon on the ice and you’re proud of how far he’s come.
“Your boyfriend is good” The boy next to you spoke as he watched Sunghoon skating
“Oh he’s not my boyfriend” This made him raise an eyebrow at you before giving a side smile
“Oh really? Then maybe we can go out sometime” The boy offered but you gave a kind smile and explained how you weren’t from the area, he was disappointed but understood
Sunghoon was in the lead as he gave you the baton for you to finish off the race. When you made contact with the baton, you tried your best to skate off. You managed to put some distant between you and the boy until he called from behind, you looked over your shoulder and he waved at you.
You move your attention back to in front of you and you saw the finish line so close to you. You managed to to be in the lead and you were happy, you could catch in the corner of your eye Sunghoon softly cheering for you.
You smiled and just when you were going to past the finish line, a body crashed into you causing you to fall onto the ice head first. You heard gasp around you and you really couldn’t open your eyes with the sudden throbbing pain with the impact.
Suddenly, you eyes focused on the one person it seemed to recognize. Sunghoon’s worried face met with yours and you could see how his eyes carefully examined you, when he touched the spot you hit your head, you winced in pain. He muttered out a soft apology and right when he was going to help you up, that was when you the saw the boy you were racing, skating towards you with a worried look on his face.
“Oh my god I am so sorry, I lost my balance and I ran into you. Are you okay?” He offered his hand for you to grab and when you were going to reach out to grab him, Sunghoon smacked the boy’s hand away
You could almost catch the glare Sunghoon gave him before helping you sit up on the ice. He patted some of the ice away as he checked your head again, he held your head into his hands softly as he looked around your head to make sure you weren’t hurt anywhere else.
Beside your throbbing head, you could feel your heart beating against your chest. The worried look in his eyes made those suppressed lingering feelings to awaken just for a moment before becoming overturned by the pain on your head.
Some way to spend a day out with Sunghoon.
You sat on the bench outside of the arena. You held an ice pack against where you got hit on your head, a big first place trophy next to you as you held a bag filled with first, second and third place gifts.
After the whole accident went down, First and Third place gave their gifts to you and Sunghoon as a form of comfort for the bad bruise forming on your head. Sunghoon decided that was enough for today and told you to sit on the bench while he pulled up the car for you so that you wouldn’t have to walk a long distance.
When his car pulled up in front, you were going to grab the gifts and trophy to give your head a break from all the icing you were doing, but Sunghoon was quick to grabbed the gifts and trophy and offer his elbow for you to hold onto.
You could walk perfectly fine but you still took his offer and softly wrapped your hand onto his elbow as he helped you to the car. You decided to indulge into your feelings just for this moment, you did just get flung to the ice you think you deserve it.
Sunghoon opened the passenger door with the hand that held the gifts and helped you inside and made sure you were comfortable. Once you gave the all clear, he opened the back seat and placed the items there before going to the driver’s side.
“Are you actually okay? I can take you to the hospital” You could feel your heart fluttering hearing Sunghoon worry about you, this was not helping you suppress your feelings
“I’m fine Sunghoon, don’t worry” You gave a soft smile and he looked at you for a few more seconds before looking away
He drove off from the ice skating rink, he doesn’t know how he would even explain to his sister of the big bruise on your head. He knew she would be furious with him but he was more furious with himself for allowing you to get hurt while he was with you.
He knew the two of you didn’t hang out a lot solo, so he hoped that this may have changed that between the two of you. Sunghoon had always seen you as his younger sister’s best friend and he won’t deny that he always wanted to know more about you but he never found a good way to approach you.
That’s why he opted out for using his bucket list to create some type of conversation with you even if you dreaded listening to it. He was more than happy to know you actually listen to him and ask questions about them, but he always feels defeated whenever you deny of ever doing such things whenever anyone else mainly his sister is around.
It wasn’t wrong for you and Sunghoon to engross yourselves in a curious conversation, so why did it always feel that way?
When he saw no surrounding cars, he took a glance over to you. He could heard a soft melody playing through the speaker from your playlist, it was able to set the mood really nicely. The sun was setting casting a beautiful orange and pink color in the sky, the peaceful driving.
Sunghoon couldn’t seem to take his eye off of you, the setting was set too perfectly that he felt a sudden tingle against his chest.
“Sunghoon red light” You pointed out and he was quick to softly step on the break to halt the car, you weren’t even looking forward so how did you notice he wasn’t look at the street but instead at you.
You continued to look out the window, holding the ice against your head, trying to calm down the nervous fluttering in your heart knowing Sunghoon had almost ran a red light because he was looking over at you.
Maybe this wasn’t as bad as you thought.
Your best friend gasped when seeing the healing bruise on your head, you went over to her house once she was feeling a little bit better. She still couldn’t go out so you decided to go over to her.
“It looks like it’s healing well” Your grimaced at her words before waving her off, it definitely looked better than how it felt
“Do you have an ice pack I can borrow?” Your best friend nodded her head, you made your way to the kitchen to grab to ice pack from the freeze
When you pressed the cold pack against your bruise, you sighed in relief. You closed your eyes just for a minute but opened them when you felt your phone vibrate, when you took it out with your free hand, you felt your self smile.
Sunghoon: You’re over? You should be resting
You and him and had nonstop been texting ever since the day you went ice skating (which was only two days ago) but to you, it still meant a lot. This was the longest time you and Sunghoon have ever texted each other, maybe he was finally warming up to you.
You: How’d you know I was over? Plus I was too bored at home
Sunghoon: I could hear you and my sister laughing like maniacs
You: Oh we were not laughing that loud
You: And if you knew I was over, how come you haven’t greeted me?
You didn’t think before sending that message, when you noticed that Sunghoon hadn’t responded, your thumbs danced around your keyboard to try and make another text that makes the previous one sound less embarrassing.
You were internally freaking out and you paced around the kitchen, forgetting about the ice pack on the counter. When you had your back faced away, you didn’t realize Sunghoon walking into the kitchen and seeing your pacing figure.
He noticed the ice pack on the counter and carefully picked it up, when you turned around you were immediately met with the coldness of the ice pack. You slightly jumped at the unexpected contact and that was when you saw Sunghoon standing in all his glory, his hand holding the ice pack that just touched your head.
You looked at him and he gave an awkward smile which you never minded to see. He placed the ice pack back on your bruise and ushered for you to hold onto it yourself, when you hand barley held the ice pack he let go.
“What are you doing?” You don’t know why that was the first thing you said, but it just slipped, you saw Sunghoon awkwardly chuckle before rubbing the back of his nape
“I came to greet you” Your heart felt like it was on fire, you knew you were trouble from this point moving forward
It’s been two weeks since the day Sunghoon took you ice skating, and the texting between you two never faltered. You two texted from early morning to late at night only to repeat it again for the past two weeks.
You could say that you felt so happy when Sunghoon showed no signs of wanting to stop texting you. The two of you seemed to learn a lot more about each other through texting and you could tell it transferred over to in person too.
He was more open when it came to talking to you in person, and he never failed to greet you when you were over. You definitely could tell that ice skating day out was what you needed in order to flip you and Sunghoon’s platonic “relationship” for the better.
“Sunghoon is offering you to take you out” You choked on your drink after hearing your best friend’s words, she patted your back to give some relief as you coughed loudly
“He’s what?” Suddenly rapid footsteps were heard and in came a rushing Sunghoon and worriedly looked around
“What happened?” You let out another cough and he worriedly looked at you wanting to see if you were okay but his sister waved him off
“I just told her about your offer on taking her out after letting that bruise form on her head” You felt conflicted, you wanted to see if Sunghoon was really offering to take you out but you also wanted to shut your best friend up from mentioning the bruise
You knew Sunghoon already felt bad, so you didn’t want him to feel worse for the healing bruise. It was getting better, it was just taking some time to fully go away.
“I was going to be the one to mention it to her but okay” Your best friend only rolled her eyes at her brother before wrapping an arm on your shoulder
“I say waste all his money when you guys go out and buy me something nice”
“Who says I was going to use his money?” You raised an eyebrow at her, if this outing hypothetically happens, you would make sure to bring your own money
“Oh well I was offering it to you to spend it on whatever you want” You slowly turned your head to Sunghoon with utter shock, as long as you’ve known him, he was always picky with how he used and wasted him money so to hear him allowing you spend his money on whatever you want sent you to the moon and back
“Oh no it’s fine! I can pay for myself”
“No please I insist”
“You idiot take the offer!” Your best friend widen her eyes at you for even thinking about rejecting the offer when clearly she knew the both of you knew how picky her brother was
You closed your eyes and deeply sighed before nodding your head in defeat, you best friend cheered while Sunghoon brightly smiled. It was a smile you saw only a few times and you forgot how it made you feel.
Your best friend ushered for you and Sunghoon to do the outing the same very day. Before you left, she made sure to send you a list of everything she wanted so that you could try and sneak in and say that it’s something you wanted instead of her.
You and Sunghoon sat in his car as he drove. He allowed you to have control over the music, so your playlist played as background music instead of blasting like last time you were here. The awkward tension was no longer there between you two as the you both talked the whole way to the outlets.
You and Sunghoon enjoyed the time you spent in his car. It wasn’t something that he was used to experiencing with you so he’s thankful that you both got closer instead of drifting even further away from each other.
When you arrived at the outlets, you didn’t realize how time consuming it was. You spent majority of the day at the outlets, you refrained from spending so much of Sunghoon’s money. You opted to spend only two dollars from his money, and you would buy a thing or two for your best friend with your own money.
Sunghoon noticed and he told you to use his money. He knew you were being cautious and considerate of him but he took you out for a reason, he wanted you to indulge yourself just a little bit.
So, as you looked at clothes, you picked up clothing pieces you thought were interesting and nice. Sunghoon followed you around, offering to hold your clothes but was shut down by you.
He would observe you and saw how you picked clothes that were out of what you usually wear. He looked at how your face would quickly express an emotion of either what the pricing is or what the clothing was. He also noticed how you were looking at clothes that weren’t apart of your usual liking.
This wasn’t out of the ordinary, of course Sunghoon knew what you like and dislike. He knows your habits whether they’re good or bad ones. He knows how to read you like an open book to know what you’re feeling.
Sunghoon knows a lot about you but it’s only because you’re his younger sister’s best friend and now you are a friend to him, no other reason.
It was already night time when you two were returning back. In the end you only spent fifteen dollars of Sunghoon’s money and the rest you secretly paid with your own. You and Sunghoon were laughing in his car as you talked about nonsense, he asked for you to grab a few napkins from his glove compartment.
So when you open his glove compartment you saw the napkins and grabbed a few but when you saw a familiar paper catch your eye, you grabbed it placing the napkins down.
Sunghoon noticed your silence and he looked over at you, when he saw you holding the familiar piece of paper he almost forgot why he had left it there. But when he finally realize what was on that paper, he felt his heart drop.
When Sunghoon reached a red light, he immediately looked at you who still said nothing as you looked at the paper. It was apart of his bucket list but it was incomplete, it stopped after one empty box that waited to be checked marked.
‘Get your first kiss’ It read, when you looked to Sunghoon he looked petrified and you felt terrible that you read it without his permission
You immediately shoved it back in the glove compartment and handed him the napkins he asked for, you gave a smile and he nervously gulped before grabbing the napkins and drove when the light turned green.
There was a silence but only for a moment until Sunghoon spoke.
“That was an incomplete bucket list. I first made it when I was entering high school but I forgot it as I got preoccupied with the others and when I found it, I couldn’t bear to look at it and threw it in there” Sunghoon explained and you listend to every single word, you didn’t want to pressure him into answering or even talking about the topic any longer so you were going to change the topic when he stopped you
“You can ask questions it’s fine, we still have some time to spare” You gulped, you didn’t know if you wanted to ask the only lingering question in your mind
He took a quick glance at you and gave a warming smile, he was showing that it was okay to ask the one question he knew lingered in your mind.
“Have you ever gotten your first kiss?” There an anticipating silence, you could hear Sunghoon sigh
“I was going to lie and say that I have but I can’t lie to you so no I haven’t had my first kiss yet” You were astonished, you assumed Sunghoon had already gotten his first kiss, you knew the amount of people that admired him so it was only natural you thought that
“I was too focused on completing the rest of the bucket list that it just never seemed to cross my mind anymore after creating that one check box” You nodded your head and shrugged your shoulders
“It’s okay though, no need to feel pressure or embarrassed. Sometimes people just wait for the right person to have their first in everything” You reassure him with a smile, Sunghoon looked over to you and he couldn’t help but smile when he saw your smile
Sunghoon wondered who’d be the right person for him to experience his first in everything or to just be his first kiss.
Sunghoon can say none in the least he couldn’t sleep. He kept thrashing in his bed, trying to have himself fall asleep but nothing. His mind was running on constant loop with one single wonder.
What if you were his first kiss? He knew he was outrageous to even think about that, you were his sister’s best friend after all. But no matter how hard he tried to get rid of the idea, it always came back stronger.
Just at the mere thought of you sends him into a spiral of emotions, how could he contain his raging heart for what it now longed for. He wasn’t oblivious when it came to these kind of things, he just didn’t know when it happened.
He didn’t know when he started to fall for you.
He must’ve been going crazy. He, Park Sunghoon, was thinking about you as more than just a friend and most definitely as more than just his younger sister’s best friend.
He wondered if you already got your first kiss, he even wondered if you felt the same way as him. He groaned into his pillow, not knowing what he was going to do with this now revelation of him falling for you.
You and Sunghoon sat in his car as he took you out for a late night drive to the park. He didn’t tell his sister that he was picking you up, it was something he wanted to keep to himself.
After coming to the realization of his feelings towards you a week ago, he wanted to put some distance between the two of you, he wanted to get rid of these feelings as soon as possible. But that failed when he realized he couldn’t go a day without talking to you.
So he opted for plan b, risk it all and indulge in his desire to be with you. Was it the best plan b? Definitely not but it had to do.
You looked at Sunghoon confused, you thought it was out of the blue when he asked if you could meet up that night, you found it even stranger when he asked to not tell his sister. You respected his decision and didn’t tell her.
You could see him shaking with nervousness and you wondered what made him feel this way. Sunghoon’s body was facing away from you until he put the car in parked to face you comfortably.
You gave him a reassuring smile and you saw his nervous facade drop for a moment as he looked at with with a glint in his eyes. He quickly shook his head and gulped, it was go big or go home.
“I know this is a lot to ask from you and you can completely say no if you want. I will understand a hundred present, your comfortability matters most to me”
“Sunghoon what are you talking about?”
“You know how we talked about me not having my first kiss?” His voice was soft and you felt your heart thumping against your chest, where was this going to go? you nodded your head
“Well uh I was doing some thinking and um” Sunghoon nervously played with his fingers, something you had never seen before, you were amused to see him so nervous but you couldn’t blame him
You could feel the same nervousness creep into you as you thought of a million ways this situation could go. But you only hope for one outcome.
“I want you to be my first kiss”
And that was when the world stopped. You could hear your heart thumping in your ear as you shifted your gaze onto him. He looked away, embarrassed with the words that came out of his mouth.
“Why me?” You didn’t mean to voice out your thought but you did, Sunghoon couldn’t even bear to look at you and groaned into his hands
The way his heart was beating he swore it was going to burst out of his chest. He didn’t know if he could handle it any longer, but he wanted to, he needed to. Because he doesn’t know how he can function if he doesn’t do this.
“Because I fell for you” Sunghoon wanted to be straight to point, he didn’t want to sugarcoat his feelings, he was going to go big because he couldn’t go home without confessing his feelings for you, he would never be able to live with himself
With his words, you almost passed out by how hard your heart was beating. You stared at him dumbfounded, you thought your mind was playing tricks on your. You blinked violently to see if you would wake up at any moment from this dream.
When it slowly sunk in that this wasn’t a dream, you looked away. Sunghoon thought that was your answer, that you didn’t feel the same way and that you didn’t want to do this.
He felt like an idiot for even thinking there could’ve been a chance of you and him.
He was going to drive you back home but before he could even change to drive, the words the fell from your mouth made him to whip his body to face you.
“I fell for you too” Now Sunghoon stared at you dumbfounded, did he hear you correctly?
“I’m pretty sure I was the one that fell first”
“I tried to get rid of my feelings for you over the course we’ve known each other and I was never successful. All I was able to do was suppress them deep into my heart and hope they go away”
“Obviously they never went away, ever since the day we went the ice skating rink that’s when I knew I could no longer hide my feelings for you. I started to fall for you again and here I am” You chuckled not realizing you were rambling on your confession
You were now playing with yours fingers, scared that you may have scared him off with what you’ve holding back but when you felt his hand separate yours to stop you from playing with your fingers.
You looked at Sunghoon and your heart melted when you saw the soft smile he had as he played with your finger with his.
“I couldn’t sleep because you were constantly on my mind. You stayed there, playing on a loop twenty four hours for seven days a week”
“I’m so sorry it took me so long to reach you. I’m so happy that you never got rid of your feelings for me, I don’t know what I would’ve done if I was too late”
“I’ll forever be grateful for my sister getting sick that day. Without that day, I would’ve never realized just how much I was going to fall for you”
“You may have fell first but I’m sure I fell harder” You chuckled at his words as your hands finally intertwined with each other and they fit like they were made for each other
When you looked up at each other, you were so close to each other. This was the moment you’ve always thought would forever be a dream. Sunghoon leaned in closer and muttered ‘Can I?’
You nodded your head and when his lips landed onto your lips, Sunghoon realized that you were his person. You were the person he wanted to have his firsts in everything with.
You and Sunghoon still held hands as your lips moved in harmony with each other. You didn’t know it was possible for something to feel so right, but as you and Sunghoon kissed you knew this was it. This was everything you’ve ever wanted.
It was a passionate yet a soft kiss. The kiss made the two of you realize that this was what you wanted your forever to be. You wanted it to be each other.
That night, Sunghoon grabbed the incomplete bucket list and used a pen lying around in his car to check off the check boxes next to ‘Get your first kiss’. You laughed but stopped when you saw him scribbling something onto the paper.
He soon passed the paper to you and held the pen for you to grab. When you read the bucket list, you felt yourself smilingly stupidly.
‘Becoming your boyfriend?’ The new check box he created was corny but you found yourself swooned by it, you grabbed the pen from him before checking it off, Sunghoon was quick to smile at the bucket list before throwing it somewhere and grasping your lips into another soft kiss
As you and Sunghoon’s relationship began, you knew this came with having to date behind his sister, your best friend’s back. You hoped whenever the time came and you told her that she’s happy for you two of you and wouldn’t despise you for the rest of your life.
But you knew that was a stretch you only hoped for.
As you played with Sunghoon’s hair under the moonlight in his room, you almost forgot that you were supposed to be sleeping over for your best friend and not her brother.
You didn’t have to worry about her waking up any time soon, she was a heavy sleeper and nothing could wake her once she was out. So when you made she was knocked out from exhaustion, you softly knocked on your boyfriend’s door and when he opened it, he was quick to drag you inside.
As you both laid on his bed it was rather a comfortable silence, his body slumped onto yours as he smiled listening to your heart beating against your chest.
The con that came with your relationship was having to wait until you were alone or in private somewhere in order to give your boyfriend a mere hug. You knew this would be the case but whenever you saw how couples held hands, gave soft kisses, you just wished you were able to do that with Sunghoon.
“What’s on your mind?” You heard Sunghoon mumbled, you didn’t want to ruin the moment so you only shook your head, he got off of you to sit up on his to face you
You looked at him with confusion and he analyzed you. He knew something was on your mind, but if you didn’t want to talk about it he wouldn’t force you to.
“I’ll alway listen to you whenever, it doesn’t matter when or where, I’m always available for you” You smiled at your boyfriends words, his words and his mere presence were the biggest comfort in the world, and you wondered what luck you must’ve had in order to finally have him
“I’m just really happy that you’re my boyfriend” Sunghoon had the same awkward smile but it held a loving feeling behind it, he soon found himself back in your arms as he placed a soft peck on your cheek
You smiled and wrapped your arm around him as he continued to place butterfly kisses all over your face. You were tying to suppress your giggles but Sunghoon whispered in your ear to let them go.
He knew it was risky, his family could possibly hear your giggles coming from his room, but he just wanted to drown in the sound of your giggles. To him, they sounded like paradise, the only paradise he would ever want to experience.
“Sunghoon she doesn’t want to hear about your latest check off on another check box” You best friend grumbled as she saw her brother happily walk into the living where you and her watched a movie
“Well too bad she’s going to” You’ve already heard his story about the completion of yet another check box on his bucket list
Your best friend grumbled before getting up from the couch to leave. She announced she was going to the kitchen and that you would have to suffer the same way she did when she first heard her brother’s story. But she was oblivious to the fact that you already knew the story, you were the first person Sunghoon told when he completed it.
When your best friend was out of sight, Sunghoon was quick to sit next to you and place a kiss on your cheek. You widen your eyes to tell him to stop but he didn’t, he continued to smother your face with his kisses.
“I’ve missed you” His voice whispered against your face, you couldn’t help but give in and place a quick peck on his lips
“We saw each other last night”
“That’s not enough for me, I need to see you every minute I’m breathing” You never knew Sunghoon had this side to him until you started dating him, he was a completely different from how he was before but he claimed that he waited for you to show this side of him
You found yourself softly chuckling at his words and nodding until your lips met with his. He smiled against the kiss and a few second when you both pulled away in walked your best friend with all kinds of snacks.
“And that’s why it must’ve been my favorite completion of anything on my bucket list” Sunghoon was quick to cover up any traces of what truly happened while his sister was gone
“You didn’t tell me that it was your favorite completion?”Your best friend tilted her head before plopping onto her spot next to you
“I didn’t? I mean it was a spur of the moment addition to my bucket list so it must’ve slipped my mind. I loved every single moment of it and if I could, I would do it over and over again” Your best friend didn’t realize the meaning behind his words, she only waved him off thinking it was the time he became poetic about his bucket list.
You on the other hand stared at Sunghoon, he was talking about the unknown bucket list that only you and him knew of. Where it checked off his first kiss and becoming your boyfriend. Your hands itched to grab his into yours.
You were falling harder than ever before for your best friend’s older brother.
Sunghoon’s sister stayed in the passenger seat of her brother’s car waiting for him to come back from his quick shopping spree.
She scrolled through her phone but jumped when she heard Sunghoon’s ringtone play through the car’s speaker. She recognized the ringtone after hearing it for years on end since he refused to change it.
She looked at the screen between the driver and passenger seat and she saw the contact name that was calling her brother, ‘love <3’.
Sunghoon’s sister was stunned, What the fuck? When did Sunghoon get a lover? Her brother never mentioned anything about dating someone, she was hurt at the fact he didn’t even tell her or their parents.
She could understand and respect his decision but she couldn’t help but be a little hurt. She thought that they were close.
Sunghoon’s sister was going to ignore the call and mind her own business, and go back to her phone but when the call was answered, she froze when she heard a familiar voice through the car speaker.
It was your voice.
You called out for her brother but when you got no response, you hung up and called again. The contact name ‘love <3’ popped up on the screen again and when the call was answered again and your voice rang into her ears, calling out for her brother to respond.
She felt like she was going to throw up at the realization. You, her best friend and Sunghoon, her brother were dating each other behind her back.
The car ride back was eerily quiet for Sunghoon’s liking, when he came back from his spur of the moment shopping, his sister faced the window and didn’t greet or even acknowledged him. He wondered what caused her to be like this but he imagined it was something he didn’t need to worry about.
Right when Sunghoon pulled up to the driveway of their house, he was going to exit his car and get the shopping bags but stopped when he heard his sister.
“Since when?”
“Since when what?”
“Sunghoon since when have you been dating my best friend?”
He felt the world halt, the way his stomach churned as he felt his sister’s hard gaze on him made him sick. She found out, he doesn’t know but she did.
His sister saw him stunned for words and scoffed. She was feeling too many emotions at once, she felt betrayal, anger, happiness. She was most frustrated that neither you or Sunghoon felt the need to tell her that the two of you were dating.
She got out of his car and slammed the door shut before going into their house, Sunghoon gripped the steering wheel before hanging his head low. He banged his hand against the steering wheel just to release the wave of emotions.
He didn’t go into his house after that, he drove off to yours to tell you that his sister found out about the two of you. But he didn’t know his sister was waiting for him on their couch to walk through the door and talk to her about what happened.
She waited 30 minutes and was met with disappointment when her brother never walked through the door, instead she only had multiple miss calls and text messages from you trying to explain. That’s was the unofficial confirmation she needed that you, her best friend were indeed dating her brother. She couldn’t believe it, she threw her phone onto the couch and walked away into her room.
It’s been a week since the whole the situation, you haven’t been over since and Sunghoon and his sister were barely on speaking terms. You tried every morning and night trying to talk to your best friend and explain everything.
You prioritized your friendship highly with her, you couldn’t and wouldn’t lose her. That’s why you stood in front of their front door, you rang the doorbell waiting for someone to answer.
When the door opened, you were greeted with your best friend’s shocked expression. You smiled and she rolled her eyes at you, she didn’t expect to see you at their front door.
“What?” Her voice was harsh and you couldn’t blame her, she had every right to be mad
“I think it’s time all three of us talk” Your soft voice contrasted her harsh one, and stayed silent breathing heavily as she looked at you, Sunghoon who heard the doorbell came to see who it was appeared from behind his sister to see you standing at their front door
You gave a quick smile to him and your best friend noticed this. She knew he was behind her, she could feel him and she sighed before moving a little for you to walk in.
You and Sunghoon didn’t initiate anything and solely kept a distant between each other to respect your best friend’s comfortability. She noticed this and grumbled softly, what was the pointing of hiding it when she already knew.
Your best friend walked and sat on the couch waiting for you two to follow suit, she knew the conversation had to happen so she decided not to waste anymore time. She wanted to know what happened between you and Sunghoon.
When you and Sunghoon sat opposite of each, your best friend sat in the middle. The tension was high, the three of you waited to find the right words to start to conversation.
“I’m so sorry” You were the one to take initiative of the whole situation, you were the one that showed up unannounced to their house
“How long?” Was your best friend’s first question, the one she’s been anticipating ever since she found out, she wanted to know how long you two have been keep it from her
“Two months” Your answered and your best friend only deeply sighed shaking her head, the two of your had been lying and sneaking behind her back for two months and acted like nothing
“And you just never planned on telling me?” She was growing frustrated at the thought that if she never found out, the two of you seemed to never tell her
“We were scared, we didn’t know how you would react to the news” She scoffed after hearing her brother’s voice now pitching in the conversation
“You guys didn’t think about how I would feel knowing you were keeping this from me?”
“We did but we believed if we told you, it would be worse” You tried to rebuttal her words but she shook her head
“No it’s worse having to hear your voice through Sunghoon’s car speaker, calling out for your boyfriend” Your best friend finally gave out to how she found out and Sunghoon realized his phone must’ve been connect to his car and when you called, your voice went to the speaker of his car instead of his phone
There was a silence, you didn’t know how to respond to her words. You couldn’t tell her that she wasn’t supposed to witness that but you also couldn’t assure her that you both wanted to tell her any time soon.
“How much do you like her?” Her gaze went onto her brother, he was surprised by the sudden question, Sunghoon may have been older by one year but she knew he never had a relationship ever before
So to see the two most important in her life together caused something to bubble in herself but she just didn’t know whether it was good or bad.
“I really like her” Sunghoon’s voice was assertive, he didn’t hesitate to answer the question
“And how much do you like him?” The questions was now for you and she sighed, you wanted to be truthful
“I know I’ve never told you, but you have no idea how much I like him” Your answer made him hang his head low to hide the growing smile on his life, he felt like he was on top of the world knowing you liked him just as much he liked you
Your best friend was silent after hearing both of your response, she stared off to oblivion before nodding her head, neither you or Sunghoon knew what this meant but you hoped it was good.
“I hate you both for not telling me sooner. You should’ve known I would’ve been your biggest supporter” Her soft chuckled caused you and Sunghoon to stared at her in bewilderment, did they hear her right?
“You’re not mad?” Your best friend shook her
“I’m mad that you guys hid it from me but I’m not mad that you two are together. I’m glad that you’re Sunghoon’s first girlfriend, and he better not screw it up so that you’ll be his last too”
“I don’t intend losing her so you don’t have to worry about that” She internally gagged at her brother’s cheesy words, she could see the love sick smile you both on your face and she couldn’t help but smile too
“Sounds like I’m stuck to this family for the rest of my life” You raised an eyebrow and both of the siblings nodded their head, you chuckled and nodded your head in acceptance, you didn’t mind being apart of the family any more than what you already were
Sunghoon never expected to fall for his sister’s best friend but unexpected things always happened in life. He was still overjoyed nonetheless to know that you and him would no longer had to hide your relationship.
You and Sunghoon had to give the biggest thanks to his overbearing bucket list for being the major reason why the two of you were finally able to find the person you wanted to experience all your firsts with.
“Park Sunghoon, thank you for your damn bucket list”
☆ LOWKEY
pairings : childhood bsf!riki x reader ; friends to lovers
synopsis : you and riki have been best friends since you guys were in kindergarten. youre both now in your last year of high school and with all that time together, people would think that you guys were bound to end up falling for each other, right? well, that seems to only be the case for riki. hes fallen in love with you after all this time, especially since you guys tend to flirt constantly, but he knows you dont feel the same. right? either way, he doesnt want to risk losing you so he tries to keep his love for you on the lowkey. will it work?
☆.。.：*。.：*・.：*・.。.：*。.：*・.：*・.。.：*。.：*・.☆
* note : this is a teaser to my first smau that i will post soon and i hope you guys will enjoy it !!
* if you would like to be tagged for when it comes out send an ask or comment !!
☆.。.：*。.：*・.：*・.。.：*。.：*・.：*・.。.：*。.：*・.☆
LOVE ME NOT - YANG JUNGWON
— synopsis: fake dating your enemy, yang jungwon, for the sake of getting your mutual friends to stop playing matchmaker is the worst idea you’ve ever heard in your life. however, it’s a bit more enticing when $100 is thrown in the mix.
— word count: 21k
— warnings: cursing, suggestive jokes, stupid teenager activities, classism
— featuring: ive wonyoung, bnd taesan, zb1 gyuvin, nwjns minji, + more 04 liner idols
— genre: enemies-to-lovers, fake dating, SLOW burn, jungwon x fem!reader, private high school au
— playlist: kiss with a fist - florence + the machine, r u mine - arctic monkeys, the way i loved you - taylor swift, you get me so high - arctic monkeys, norman fucking rockwell - lana del rey, make up your mind - florence + the machine (feat. fire burning - sean kingston, come on eileen - dexy’s midnight runners for part 17)
— a/n: lowkey so relieved this is over and finally written after FOREVER. in the same breath i am so sad because this fic has been in the works for years (at least 3) and to see it finally written is so bittersweet :( thank you to everyone who supported me while writing this !!! i love you all so much !!!
— taglist: @jwonistic @ilovejungwonandhaechan @wensurr @yyawnjun @slvtella @dimplewonie @ch4c0nnenh4
i. GOD-DAMN, MAN CHILD
The wind always blows when you don’t want it to.
At least, that’s what it feels like.
You were sat on a bench outside of the country club owned by your friend’s family. They were crazily wealthy, owning not only a country club but also many vacation homes and businesses. That was pretty much a given though, especially since you had met your friend at a private and prestigious academy. Everyone that attended the school was extremely well off in a sense. Most of the students had parents who were business owners, political figures, or even celebrities. To say that you were an outlier would be an understatement.
You didn’t come from wealth. In fact, you were one of the only students at your school to not come from wealth. You were offered a scholarship for your academics; last year, you had an opportunity from your old school to take a test that offered a scholarship to your current academy if you scored well. Only the top five scorers would be granted admission. You and four other students were awarded with the scholarship.
Unfortunately, that meant that you had left a completely different life behind. Your two best friends from childhood, Minji and Gyuvin, were both in support of your academic opportunity, but neither of them had passed the test, so you were left alone. A new, clean slate at a school where you knew next to no one.
Your new classmates made no effort to help you fit in. In fact, most of them ridiculed you for coming from a lower class. It was expected when mingling with snotty prep school kids, but it still hurt. The only person that hadn’t singled you out was Wonyoung.
She was easily the most popular girl there, but she still brought you under her wing. This caused the others to be slightly kinder to you, but only in her presence.
So here you were, sat on a bench, outside of her family’s country club, swinging your legs and glancing at the tennis court in front of you. It was late March, and though the weather reports had said that it would be nice enough outside to wear a skirt, your legs were cursing you because of the wind.
Wonyoung had gone inside temporarily to go fetch the two boys that you were going to play tennis with. She’d left about two minutes ago, telling you that she just had to run down to the entrance gate and she’d be back as soon as possible.
You fidgeted with the hem of the skirt you were wearing. It wasn’t even yours; it was Wonyoung’s, and she had let you borrow it for today. You laughed at yourself, because here you were, at a country club, yet the clothes you were wearing weren’t even yours. From an outsiders perspective, you seemed rich. Everyone else could tell the truth, though.
Another breeze passed by and you stood up, walking towards the door. You weren’t sure how much longer you’d have to wait, so you figured that you may as well wait inside.
As if on cue, Wonyoung exited the door with the two boys. You knew both of them from school. Honestly, you liked Wonyoung’s boyfriend. His name was Taesan. He was always nice to you, and never made you feel bad for being of a lower class.
The other boy, however, seemed to have a personal vendetta against you, and you had no idea why. He didn’t seem to like you from the first day you met, even though you’d been nice to him from the get-go. If you had to guess why he didn’t like you, it was probably for the same reason that none of your other peers seemed to like you: your wealth status.
Jungwon was his name, and aside from being a major jerk to you, he was extremely intelligent. Ever since you arrived at the school, you’d been one of the top ranked students. It made sense, too, as you were permitted into the school based on your academics. Jungwon was ranked second to you in most classes. You figured that could be another reason.
As soon as you met eyes with Jungwon, he rolled his own and shook his head. He was donned in the most prestigious tennis outfit you’d ever seen, which was saying a lot, given as this country club was flooded with rich and pretentious tennis players.
“Okay,” Wonyoung started, walking over to you, “now that we are all here, do you guys want to warm up?”
“Yeah,” Jungwon said, looking away from you, “let’s warm up.”
You didn’t miss how Jungwon slightly shoulder-checked you as he walked towards the tennis courts.
You entered the fenced-in courts, and another breeze blew in your direction. As a reaction, you shivered, making Wonyoung giggle as she made her way towards you.
“Sorry about the hold up,” she started, bouncing a tennis ball on the court, practicing her serving. She looked over at the other side of the court, where Jungwon and Taesan were situated. She laughed, “but those two were taking forever. They’re weird.” She offered you an apologetic smile.
“It’s fine,” you said, “I was just afraid you wouldn’t come back. I stick out like a sore thumb here.”
Wonyoung frowned, “No you don’t, Y/N. I don’t think a single person here batted an eye while I was gone.”
“You were gone,” you teased, “how would you know?”
“I know lots of things,” she commented, “I know lots and lots of things.”
You bounced the tennis ball on the court as you laughed at her words, “Whatever you say.”
After about five minutes of warming up and a dirty look exchanged with Jungwon later, Wonyoung announced, “Okay, let’s get to playing! Do we wanna do singles or doubles?”
“Let’s do doubles,” Taesan said, walking towards the net. He patted Jungwon on the back, “and Jungwon, you can be partners with Y/N. Is that okay with you guys?”
Wonyoung turned to you, “It’s fine with me as long as you’re okay with it.”
“Yeah, sure.”
Taesan started walking over to Wonyoung, so you took that as your cue to go ahead and walk to the side Jungwon was on. Even though you knew Jungwon wasn’t your biggest fan, you still attempted formalities with him.
“Good luck,” you commented, looking at him. You sent him a little smile, “I’ll play to the best of my ability, but I don’t play often. So, sorry in advance.”
“I’m not surprised.” Jungwon replied under his breath, thinking that you wouldn’t hear. You decided to just ignore him and play to the best of your ability, like you said you would.
The first game started with Wonyoung serving and you receiving, but the first game was cut relatively short with an easy 40-15 that ended in your team’s loss.
The rest of the games of the first set ended very similarly, to no surprise. Wonyoung’s family owned the country club. Of course she would be good at the game.
So far, you and Jungwon had only won two sets out of the seven played. Wonyoung and Taesan only needed to win one more set to win the match.
Jungwon, quite obviously, was extremely frustrated at this loss. Very early on, you’d learned that he was a sore loser, and that you being bad at tennis definitely wasn’t helping soothe his anger.
After the final set that ended up in, surprise, a win for Wonyoung and Taesan, the two winners went to take a quick victory break while they left you and Jungwon to “discuss game strategies” as they phrased it.
In the three minutes that they’d been gone, no words were exchanged between you and Jungwon. He was just repeatedly slamming the tennis ball into the court and catching it when it bounced back. The air was tense, but you still tried to make conversation.
“Sorry about that.”
“Your horrible playing?” Jungwon snidely remarked, “Yeah. Thanks for the apology, but that doesn’t change that you’re making us lose.”
You furrowed your eyebrows at him, “You’re acting like this is life or death. It’s just tennis.”
“Yeah, it may be just tennis to you. But some people, of… higher class… take it more seriously than people like you would. So I don’t expect you to understand.”
“People like me?!” You laughed incredulously, surprised at his audacity. You tried your best to keep your voice down to not draw any attention towards you two, but with his attitude, it was difficult.
“Yeah, people like you. Did I stutter?” He asked snarky.
Your words got caught in your mouth- most of the time when people were mean to you, you’d just either ask them what they said (even when you’d heard it) or you’d repeat what they said to you, and that usually made them back off. Clearly this wasn’t the case for Jungwon, though, as he was completely okay with repeating himself and not even thinking twice about what he said to you. You groaned, turning away from him, “You’re not nice.”
“And you’re bad at tennis.”
“At least I’m good at math…” you trailed off, semi-hoping that he wouldn’t hear. You were better than Jungwon when it came to math, and that was a sensitive topic for him. But, if he wanted to ridicule your tennis-playing skills, then you would ridicule his mathematical abilities.
The tennis ball that was being aggressively bounced into the court stopped. You didn’t need to look at Jungwon to know his eyes were boring holes into the back of your head.
“What did you say?” Jungwon seethed out, taking a step closer to you.
“Nothing…” you trailed off, facing him, “it’s just that… I don’t need to be good at tennis. I’m smart.”
“Psh.” Jungwon rolled his eyes at you, “At least my parents can pay for good schooling. Sucks that yours have to mooch off of a scholarship.”
You rolled your eyes back, very slightly raising your voice at him, “Yeah. Imagine your parents having to pay for the same schooling that I get. And I get it for free.”
Before any more words could be exchanged, Wonyoung and Taesan returned with canned drinks, one in each hand for the both of them and for you and Jungwon. Wonyoung smiled, “We brought you guys back something to drink!”
You felt most of your anger dissipate at Wonyoung’s return, smiling at her. She and Taesan entered the courts once again and you met her in the middle, “Thank you.”
“Of course. Taesan also brought something for Jungwon.”
You nodded as she handed you the beverage, cracking it open and taking a drink. The cold liquid felt like a good refresher to the heated argument that was just beginning to unfold minutes ago.
“I’m glad that you and Jungwon seem to be getting along.” Wonyoung commented, nearly making you choke on the drink. She tucked a piece of hair behind her ears, “You guys wouldn’t make a bad couple.”
ii. SO SIT BACK AND WATCH THE BED BURN
You rolled yourself across your twin-sized mattress as you turned to face your two best friends, Minji and Gyuvin. You’d called them over to your family’s apartment to catch up, which was a much needed occasion, as you three hadn’t had much time to talk recently.
Minji and Gyuvin had just entered your bedroom door and stepped into your room, which was littered in posters, pictures, and art. Your room had always been cluttered (or “used to its maximum capacity” as your mother liked to phrase it) like this so your best friends weren’t surprised at anything when they walked in.
“Thanks for knocking.” You sarcastically remarked, pushing yourself onto your forearms to look at them. You watched as your two friends made their ways to the area in front of the foot of your bed, and saw as Minji took a seat on the rug on your floor. Gyuvin opted to take your desk chair and roll it to sit next to Minji, yet be eye-level with you.
“You look stressed,” Gyuvin commented, teasing you, “but what else is new.”
You flopped your face into your bed and let out a muffled and sarcastic, “Ha, ha.”
You heard a smacking sound and then an “Ow!” from Gyuvin. Minji stood up and made you scoot over so she could lay next to you in your bed, “Ignore him. His panties are in a twist right now for some reason.”
You turned your head to the left to look at her for a moment before dramatically flopping back into the mattress.
Minji patted your head, “What’s wrong, Y/N? You’re not usually this dramatic when we come over.”
Gyuvin stifled a laugh before quieting as soon as Minji sent him a pointed look.
You dramatically rolled over to face the ceiling of your room, “Why are boys so horrible?”
“Oh, don’t tell me you have a crush,” Minji groaned, “I’m no good with those.”
“No, no!” You rushed to correct her, not missing how Gyuvin was taunting in the mean time. He sung, “Ooh~ Y/N has a crush!”
“He is not a crush! He’s the worst person I’ve ever met!”
“Come on, Y/N,” Minji poked you, “he can’t be the worst person you’ve ever met. Think about Gyuvin!”
You rolled your eyes at Gyuvin, who was still taunting you with his song, “Gyuvin, shut the hell up!”
You watched as Minji lifted a hand that threatened to fall onto Gyuvin’s exposed thigh, and to which Gyuvin immediately shut up.
“What guy are you talking about?” Minji asked, looking back down at you.
“He’s this guy from the new school. He’s such an asshole to me for no reason. I mean, there might be a reason, but I can’t think of a valid one.”
“What does he do?” Gyuvin pitched in, finally getting his attention piqued from the conversation at hand.
“Like, everything?” You let out, “I’m not even sure where to start.”
“Saying ‘everything’ gives us no idea what this guy does, Y/N.”
You groaned dramatically before filling your friends in on the entire situation with Jungwon:
“I haven’t really told you guys about this guy before,” you started, using your hands to explain your story. Minji nodded as you told your story, while Gyuvin was spinning in his chair endlessly. You continued, “but there’s a guy at the new school, his name is Jungwon. Yang Jungwon.”
“Yang Y/N~” Gyuvin teased. Minji reached over to harshly smack his leg.
You rolled your eyes, “Anyways, he’s basically the worst person I’ve ever met. His dad runs a corporation of local gas stations, so he’s basically filthy rich. I say this because not only is he like every other private school kid that makes fun of my wealth status, but he’s also threatened to sue my parents multiple times. Most of the time he has no reason.
“The reason I’m so particularly upset about him is because I went to my school friends’ country club. You guys remember Wonyoung?” They both nodded, because as Wonyoung was your closest private school friend, of course your actual closest friends knew about her existence.
“Okay,” you said, “so we were at her country club, but her boyfriend and his friend are also there, and you’ll never guess who the friend is! Jungwon!
“He’s an ass to me basically the whole time while I’ve been trying to be nice to him,” you sighed, “I don’t know what his problem is. I didn’t even do anything to him. Anyways, we were partnered up because we were playing doubles tennis at the country club, because Wonyoung wanted to be on the same team as her boyfriend. That’s understandable, and I haven’t held it against her or anything. But he is not only a sore loser, but just a jerk to me.”
Minji nodded in sympathy at you while Gyuvin made his presence known, “Kill him. Easy as that.”
“You’re sick in the head, you know that?” MInji questioned him.
“He’s a private school kid, Y/N.” Gyuvin said, standing up from the chair to stand over you. “I really don’t know what you’re expecting from someone like him. He’s probably never been told ‘No’ in his life.”
“I’m also a private school kid…” you murmured.
“Yeah, but you weren’t brought up that way. He undoubtedly was.” Gyuvin said.
You nodded, “You’re right.”
“Always am.”
“The problem is that it’s my senior year,” you lamented, “and I don’t want it to be bad just because some pest can’t leave me alone. I just don’t know how to get rid of him.”
“You could always drop out.” Gyuvin offered, going to sit back down in the chair.
“That’s a horrible idea,” Minji said, “don’t listen to him. I’m sure that as long as you don’t pay much mind to this Jungwon guy then you’ll be fine. Plus, you have Wonyoung. They’re basically the same height, and she could probably beat him in a fight.”
You laughed, “I don’t know, I like Wonyoung a lot, but she’s basically Ivy Hills royalty. She has a reputation to manage. I’m sure fighting with Jungwon wouldn’t do her much good.”
“I would pay money to see that fight.” Gyuvin announced.
“You’re weird.”
“My mind is an enigma. I wouldn’t expect commonfolk like you to understand.”
iii. JUST SO FRUSTRATING
The halls of Ivy Hills Private Academy never failed to make your head hurt.
The utter abundance of students flooding the halls and blocking every locker at 7:30am was absolutely astounding to you. Not one person there paid any mind to you, and if by chance they did, it was a slight shove or a snarky comment. The bright, fluorescent lights surely didn’t help. You tried your hardest to blend into the background, but even though you were donned in the same uniform as all your peers, somehow you still stuck out like a sore thumb to them. It was almost like they could feel your class difference radiating off of you.
Wonyoung was one of the only people who made you feel normal. The only way that others would treat you kindly was if she was also present, since she was basically the school’s princess. You had just received a text from her that read:
good morning !! do you wanna get some food this weekend? it’s on me :)
You had no idea what your plans were for the weekend; it was only Tuesday after all. But you were sure that as long as you weren’t scheduled to work, you’d be doing nothing else. Besides, Wonyoung was always great to be around. You had yet to respond to her text, needing to not only check your schedule but also run the plans by your parents before you acted on anything. They really liked Wonyoung, so you doubted there would be a problem, but it was always best to check.
You sighed, tucking your phone into your bag while walking to your locker. You were mandated to keep your phone stowed away somewhere, and as a student at the school with a scholarship, you wanted to abide by any rules. You couldn’t risk the possibility of getting the scholarship pulled from you; you didn’t have the privilege to keep the school quiet with monetary bribes like others did. You snapped out of your train of thought and started to unlock your locker to put the majority of your textbooks away. The first class on your schedule was AP Calculus BC, one of the tougher classes at Ivy Hills, but you found it relatively easy.
Of course, it was one of the classes you shared with Jungwon.
It would be okay. You’d just do your best to not get into any quarrels with him.
You left your locker and walked quickly to your Calculus class, wasting no time to converse with others or engage in any sort of interaction with them. The Calculus class was only a hallway down from your locker, but it would still be difficult to get in there quickly with the amount of students crowding the halls. You cradled your school bag in your arms and tried your best to not run into anyone.
The AP Calculus BC teacher was possibly the stingiest educator you’d ever witnessed. She refused to let people turn anything in late, she refused to give extensions, and she refused to accept wrong answers. You’d learned this very early on in her class; one of your female peers forgot to turn her homework packet until the end of the bell, and your teacher almost didn’t even let her turn it in. You were sure she only let the girl turn it in due to the amount of points the packet was worth, and a lack of turning it in would surely result in a failing grade in the class.
You quickly found your assigned seat near the window on the far wall. The sun was still rising above the horizon, and your window seat gave a beautiful view of the sight. The sunlight spilled into the room like a calm water fountain, leaving you smiling without realizing.
Sitting down at your desk, you placed your bag to the right of your seat and opened it to pull out your binder, textbook, calculator, and a pencil. You usually opted to use mechanical pencils, but they’d all somehow gone missing, so you were forced to use a wooden one. You grabbed your pencil sharpener from your bag just to be safe.
As you lifted your head back up, you saw a face that nearly made you jump. It was Yang Jungwon, who happened to have an assigned seat right next to you in this class. Just your luck. It made sense, having the two smartest people in the class next to each other. Your teacher didn’t have to worry about any cheating on tests, at the very least.
Jungwon had one strap of his backpack looped around his right shoulder and the left side was just hanging. He was talking with some friends. You didn’t know their names, yet you were positive that they’d at least called you ‘poor’ once before. Not surprising coming from friends of Jungwon.
You started pulling out a work packet from your binder and flipped to the page in the textbook that the teacher had written on the board: 295. Sure, class hadn’t started yet, but that doesn’t mean you couldn’t get ready for it to start. You were eager to finish this last unit; the last month or so of class would be spent reviewing for the AP test. You were nearly positive you’d receive a score of five.
Out of the corner of your eye, you watched Jungwon make his way to his desk, the one to your right. He sneered at your presence, “Already got your stuff out, huh? God, what a nerd.”
Rolling your eyes, you responded, “Thanks. We’re in the same class so that also makes you a nerd.”
“There’s still time until class starts,” he said, “no need to get your stuff out ten minutes early.”
“No need to be a prick ten minutes early. Come bother me during school hours, Jungwon. Give me my ten minutes of peace while I still have them.”
Surprisingly to you, he turned away and stopped himself from snapping back.
Your ten minutes of peace quickly felt like thirty seconds when Jungwon returned to his seat at the beginning of class.
Your teacher had immediately tasked you and your classmates with pairing up with the four people closest to you; your group was you, Jungwon, a girl named Sull Yoona, and another boy named Leehan. The aforementioned two weren’t the kindest to you, but when compared with how Jungwon treated you, you were a dutchess. The groups were assigned to work on the work packet and solve fifteen problems by the end of the class period, which was roughly an hour away. You dreaded what was to come, but sucked it up. Yoona and Leehan were smart enough. Plus, conversations would be minimal anyways.
The answers you all shared majorly coincided with one another, yet there was one — problem 13 — where Jungwon and Leehan got a different answer, and refused to change their answers to fit yours. You didn’t care too much, you were sure that your and Yoona’s answer was the correct one.
“Jungwon,” you tried to reason, “the question isn’t asking for the distance traveled. It’s asking for the displacement.”
“I’m not listening to you, Y/N.” He huffed, “You tried to tell us that the last question’s answer was that the limit does not exist.”
“Okay,” you admitted, “I made a calculation error. But I’m sure that I’m right about this one.”
“I don’t care. We’ll see who’s right at the end of class.”
Another fifteen minutes passed and there was ten minutes left of class, and as most of your classmates had finished, your teacher called on a different group for each problem to answer and explain how they got what they did.
When the teacher got to question 13, it was your group’s turn to answer. Jungwon immediately stepped up to the question. His answer, which he announced confidently, was “8 meters”.
Your teacher frowned at Jungwon, “That is not the correct answer. Can someone else from the group answer differently? And maybe correctly this time? How about Y/N?”
You smiled at your teacher, “I got -5 1/3 meters.”
“That is correct. Thank you, Y/N.”
You didn’t miss how Jungwon gave you a nasty side eye when you answered correctly. The teacher quickly moved onto the next group with question 14.
Wanting to push his buttons slightly more, you leaned to your right and whispered, “I hope you realize I got into this school for a reason.”
iv. YOU CALL THE SHOTS
It was now Saturday: the day that Wonyoung had asked you to get food with her. Over the week you’d agreed to go get lunch with her on Saturday, and decided on a locally owned Italian restaurant to eat at.
It was a complete shock to you to find out that Taesan and Jungwon were also going to be at this lunch.
Wonyoung didn’t tell you, and you were sure there was no malicious intent, but the irony of this happening to you twice was slowly chipping away at your sanity.
When you arrived at the restaurant to find Jungwon and Taesan already waiting for you two, you fought every urge in your body to roll your eyes at Jungwon’s presence.
“You’re here!” Taesan called once he laid his eyes on Wonyoung. He embraced her quickly before turning to you, “Hello, Y/N. Great seeing you too.” There were no hints of sarcasm in his words, but you weren’t sure how great you felt seeing him. Not like you hated Taesan, but the growth that followed him around (Jungwon) definitely didn’t make you happy.
As if on cue, the host came back with menus and led the four of you to your table. When Wonyoung had mentioned food, you made the wrong assumption of going somewhere casual; the fact that Wonyoung was filthy rich somehow slipped your mind. There was no way you could afford most of the items they sold here, but since Wonyoung was paying, you let yourself relax a bit.
Wonyoung and Taesan were the two that are following closest behind the host, leaving you and Jungwon to be the last two in the group. You tried your best to slightly trail behind him, not wanting any altercations (especially in front of Wonyoung), but to your dismay, Jungwon had other plans in mind.
He slowed his pace just slightly to make a little snarky remark, “I hope you know that if Wonyoung wasn’t your wallet, you’d never step foot in any place like this.”
His words hurt, but it wasn’t anything that you weren’t already used to. You ignored him and picked up your pace slightly.
When you reached the table, Wonyoung and Taesan (unsurprisingly) chose to sit next to each other, leaving you and Jungwon to occupy the remaining seats. You braced yourself for what you thought would be a peaceful lunch turning into a living Hell.
Lunch, shockingly, went a lot smoother than you had anticipated it would be. Jungwon mostly kept his comments under wraps, and nothing he said was hurtful enough to actually provoke you into retorting with something potentially worse.
Near the end of the meal, Wonyoung excused herself to go to the bathroom. Seeing this as the perfect opportunity to finally be able to talk to her without the boys around, you leapt up and joined her.
Once in the bathroom, Wonyoung immediately went into a stall while you stood in front of the luxurious sink. You adjusted your clothes and some of your makeup while she occupied herself.
Once the toilet flushed and you were sure there wasn’t anyone else in the bathroom, you spoke up and finally popped a question to Wonyoung:
“Can I ask you something?”
Wonyoung emerged from the stall and walked to the sink next to the one you occupied. She turned on the water, “Sure, what’s up?”
“How come you haven’t been telling me when Jungwon and Taesan will be joining us at stuff? I don’t mind it all too much, but I feel like I’m being led into it blindfolded instead.”
“Oh, I-” she stopped herself, an indecipherable look on her face. She finished washing her hands and turned to you, “I’m sorry about not telling you, first of all. I’ll make sure to be more transparent about it in the future.”
“Thank you,” you said, “but my question is why are they there all the time? I understand Taesan; that’s your boyfriend. But Jungwon and I have no relation outside of being the assumed valedictorian and salutatorian of our graduating class.”
“Well,” Wonyoung smiled, “Taesan and I just think you guys are so cute together. Like, not only are you both geniuses, but you’re also both Taesan’s and my respective closest friends!”
You tilted your head, wanting her to continue.
“Listen, Y/N.” She grabbed your hand, her cold and dainty hands wrapping themselves around your right one. She smiled genuinely, “You’ve just been able to help me so much, so I want to return the favor! You deserve someone like Jungwon. He’s smart, he’s a gentleman, his dad has a lot of power, he’s athletic.”
You pursed your lips at her.
“Plus,” she continued, “with you two being the most intelligent students in the school, can you imagine the cute study dates? I’m just getting giddy thinking about it!!”
“Wonyoung…” you started carefully, “I think I’m okay. I should probably worry more about school than any potential relationship right now anyways.”
“If you say so,” Wonyoung removed her hands from yours, “but I’m still rooting for this. The second you tell me to back off, I will, but for now, Taesan and I are going to try to help you two from the sidelines.”
v. HOPE YOU DON’T REGRET IT
The following day, you, Minji, and Gyuvin were all situated at Minji’s house, in her living room. Minji was sitting in an armchair, Gyuvin was on the sofa, and you were sprawled out on the floor, in yet another dramatic mood.
You recapped your two best friends on the incidental Saturday lunch, not missing any details. Starting from the presence of Jungwon, and especially up to the comment Wonyoung made about you two getting together. The whole entire story was crazy to you and reliving it through your storytelling made you almost shiver in fear.
“And she went, ‘we will help you from the sidelines’,” you lamented, “like who says that?! I get that she has no idea about the rivalry, but he and I aren’t even cute together. He’s short.”
Gyuvin let out a hearty laugh at your comment, “Y/N, if he’s short, then you are also short.”
“Besides the point!”
“Your life does not even sound real,” Minji said, “and it’s so hard to not laugh, I’m sorry.”
You groaned from your spot on the floor, sending Minji a side eye, “Is my life some joke to you two?!”
“A little bit.” Gyuvin laughed out.
You rolled your eyes and flipped over onto your stomach, “This is so not funny.”
“Have you thought about just telling Wonyoung to back off?” Minji asked.
“Yeah, I have, thanks.” You replied to her sarcastically. You craned your neck to look at your best friend, “I haven’t done it because I know for a fact she would ask why. And I don’t wanna get into all of that, especially because her boyfriend is best friends with the devil in question.”
Minji snorted, “You two should just fake date. That’d get Wonyoung to back off.”
You immediately sat up, “Are you crazy?! Absolutely not!”
Gyuvin agreed from his spot, “Minji has a point. Maybe you two could even become friends along the way.”
Shaking your head profusely, you shot a look at Gyuvin, then at Minji, “You guys are crazy.”
“What if,” Minji proposed, “you did it for money? You just told us about how your workplace is shutting down. Plus, you need the money. You’re broke as fuck.”
“Ouch.”
“She’s right, I hate to admit it.” Gyuvin said, shrugging.
“Oh, absolutely not. I may be broke but not broke enough to date Yang Jungwon, even if it’s fake.”
“How about this?” Gyuvin challenged, “If you can successfully fake date this guy until your pretentious-ass Ivy Hills Ball dance in a couple weeks, I’ll give you $50. But only if you also go to the dance with him.”
“It’s like you want me to kill myself.”
“I’ll also give you $50.” Minji said, raising her eyebrows.
The Ivy Hills Ball dance was essentially a more talked-up prom, but from what you’d heard, it was held in an old music hall and the funding was insane. To have that experience be ruined by having Jungwon as a date did not sound enticing in the slightest, but $100 dollars did.
Plus, Gyuvin was right. It would only be a couple weeks.
“You guys drive a hard fucking bargain, I hate you two.”
“Damn,” Gyuvin laughed, “your ass really is broke. $100 to date your alleged enemy, and you’re sold.”
“I haven’t agreed!” You reasoned, trying to defend yourself.
“We both know you will, Y/N.” Minji cocked an eyebrow.
“I really, really hate you two.”
vi. YOU GAVE A KICK, I GAVE A SLAP
Any consideration you had towards fake dating Jungwon was almost thrown out the window on the next Wednesday.
It was your AP Physics bell, which, surprise, was shared with Jungwon.
After almost trying to embarrass you in front of the class (yet luckily failing), you had to fight every urge inside to not curse him out right in that moment.
You breathed heavily out at him, “Jungwon, if you keep bothering Hanni and I, we’ll never finish this lab. And neither will you.”
“You say that like you’re smart enough to finish this lab even if I wasn’t bothering you.”
You didn’t miss how Hanni immediately widened her eyes and focused her attention back onto her lab notebook. Other classmates’ attention was caught from Jungwon’s loud comment, making your face flush a bright red.
Breathing out heavily, you sent Jungwon the most nasty look you could muster. Blinking once at him, “Shut up, Yang. Shut up for once in your goddamn life.”
Jungwon cocked an eyebrow at you, slightly smirking. He placed down his pencil, “Why don’t you make me?”
You started at him, not breaking eye contact. Of course you couldn’t ‘make him’ shut up, but that wouldn’t stop you from trying to kill him with your gaze.
“That’s what I thought,” he remarked, “all bark but no bite. Typical Y/N.”
“You’re the worst person I’ve ever met.”
“The feeling is mutual.”
vii. AND I CAN’T LOOK YOU IN THE EYES
The following weekend, you found yourself at Wonyoung’s mansion with Taesan and Jungwon. This time, Wonyoung had warned you that Jungwon and Taesan would be present, yet you still decided to go. Because who was Yang Jungwon to dictate when you could and couldn’t hang out with Wonyoung?
Wonyoung had recently opened her pool back up and invited the three of you over to be the first to swim in it. You happily accepted, having no other plans for the day and promising yourself that you wouldn’t let Jungwon’s presence bother you.
While in the pool, you kept letting your mind drift to the bet that Minji and Gyuvin had proposed to you earlier that week. The $100 sounded really appealing, and potentially getting Wonyoung off your back about getting you and Jungwon together would also be nice.
Noticing your distancing, Wonyoung swam up to you, “What’s wrong? Is everything okay?”
You snapped out of your thoughts and looked at her, “Yeah, yeah. Everything’s fine, just thinking.”
She nodded at you while you pondered whether taking a break inside would be good to clear your mind for the time being. You decided that at the moment, that seemed best. You spoke again, “Actually, I think I’m gonna go inside to get a drink. Is that okay?”
“Yeah,” she smiled, “of course. Make sure to dry off well before you go in though.”
You nodded at her, watching her swim away back to Taesan while you swam to the pool steps and got out. You quickly found your towel and sandals, then went to the door that led back into the house.
You wrapped the towel around your shoulders and dried your feet on the bath mat that the Jangs had outside their home. Opening the door, you took one last look at the three in the pool, accidentally locking eyes with Jungwon. You furrowed your eyebrows and entered the house.
You entered the house of your friend and approached the kitchen where there was lemon water waiting in a pitcher. Of course, the rich family drank lemon water. You put ice into your newly found cup and sighed. While pouring yourself a glass, you heard the back door open and close again, signifying someone was also coming inside the house. You hoped it was Wonyoung, or even Taesan, but you were disappointed when you saw Jungwon’s figure walk towards the kitchen.
At his presence, your mind came back to the bet. You really needed the money right now, and getting Wonyoung off your back about him would also be a major plus.
Jungwon strode his way into the kitchen, passing you to grab a can of what appeared to be some seltzer water. His hair was still wet and his body was damp, him having done an obviously half-assed job at drying himself off. His towel was wrapped around his waist, but what drew you in was his body. Had he always had this attractive of a figure?
“I think you have a staring problem.” He said, smirking at you and making you snap out of your daze. You cleared your throat and felt heat rise to your cheeks.
“I don’t,” you clarified, “I was just… spacing out.”
“Sure.”
A layer of silence fell over the two of you, you avoiding looking at Jungwon in order to not inflate his ego any further. Your mind went back to the bet. Would this be an appropriate time?
You quickly decided, fuck it, and cleared your throat once more to get his attention, “Jungwon.”
He rolled his eyes and let out an exasperated breath through his nose, but answered, “What?”
“I, um,” you tried to find the words, “I have a really.. interesting.. hypothetical for you. Could be good, could be bad, just- a hypothetical.”
He raised an eyebrow at you questioningly, “Go on…”
“So,” you got a hold of yourself finally. This was just Jungwon you were talking to; if he declined your suggestion to the bet, you’d live. You looked at him, “I can’t be the only one that’s being bothered by Wonyoung and Taesan about the two of us getting together, right?”
Jungwon paused but then answered, “You aren’t.”
“Okay,” you continued, “so I recently saw some of my closest friends and they know about the whole thing. They came up with the proposal for you and I to fake date. Before you say anything, I’m not exactly thrilled either, but I think it would work. I’m sure you’re not too happy to be forced to be around me all the time either.”
“I feel like there’s an ulterior motive here,” Jungwon replied, “so tell me what it is you’re gaining out of this.”
“Getting Wonyoung off my back, of course. I also may be getting paid $100 by my friends to fake date you.”
“Why would you be getting paid?” He asked, crossing his arms.
“They know we don’t like each other, so they think it’s funny. They said if we successfully date until the dance, I’ll get the money.”
“This sounds really stupid.” Jungwon said, disgusted.
“I’ll give you half the money,” you offered, “I promise.”
Jungwon scoffed, “You think I need the money? Funny joke.”
You rolled your eyes, “Okay, rich boy,” you started walking back towards the door that went to the pool, “whatever. As long as you’re fine with Wonyoung and Taesan never leaving us alone, then suit yourself.”
You stopped in your tracks, turning over your shoulder to finish your ment:
“I didn’t expect you of all people to say yes, anyway.”
You watched as Jungwon cocked an eyebrow, his tongue prodding his cheek. He swallowed, taking quick steps toward you before you could open the door.
“Y/N,” he said, suddenly sounding challenged, “wait. Let’s discuss this.”
viii. IT’S JUST WHAT YOU DO
The following Monday, you were sat next to Jungwon in your Calculus class, supposedly listening to a lecture. Having not discussed the concrete rules with Jungwon yet, you decided that passing him a note to ask about if talking them through after class would be alright with him.
You ripped a corner off of your notebook paper and quickly scribbled down:
Hey. Do u wanna discuss the rules after class?
As discreetly as possible, you tapped Jungwon on the sleeve of his uniform and when he turned his head, you handed him the note. He gave you a wide-eyed look but grabbed the paper anyway.
You turned your head back to your teacher, but moments later your attention was taken by Jungwon, who had tapped on your arm instead this time. You read his handwriting:
What rules
Was he dumb? How he could be so good at math but so socially unaware was astonishing to you.
You flipped the small piece of paper once and wrote your response:
For fake dating? We need to establish rules. Unless you’ve already chickened out …
You passed the slip back to Jungwon.
Within seconds, he handed the paper back to you. His response read:
I didn’t chicken out. We don’t have much time between classes but as long as you’re fine walking the same way as me we can do it then. Make it quick though. I don’t want to be seen with you if I don’t have to be.
You stifled a laugh, and quickly wrote back:
You agreed to this, man. You’re gonna have to get used to being seen with me anyways
Jungwon read your written message and rolled his eyes. He crumpled the paper up and shoved it somewhere in his bag, never to be seen again.
Minutes later, the bell rang. You packed up your items and waited for Jungwon to finish packing his up so you could leave the class. Once finished, he started, “So?”
“Let’s walk and talk,” you said, leading the way. Jungwon was quickly on your heels. You shrugged, “the hallways will be too loud for people to overhear anyway.”
Jungwon nodded and speedily made his way next to your side in the hallway. You were right, not only was it loud, but no one would be paying any mind to you two anyway. At least hopefully.
“First off, if anyone asks, from this moment on, you and I are dating, okay?”
Jungwon breathed out a little sigh and pursed his lips, “Yep. Let’s get onto the rules now. We’ve only got so much time.”
“Okay,” you started, “first rule: this only goes until the dance. We’ll go to the dance as each other’s dates, and after that, we can ‘break up’.”
For once in his life, Jungwon agreed with you, “Sounds fine to me.”
“Great. Have any ideas for rule two?”
“Uh…” he paused, trailing off in thought. “Hm. Who is allowed to know that we’re fake dating?”
“I mean, ideally no one. But because my two other friends know, I feel like as long as it’s someone you trust that’s not close with Wonyoung or Taesan then it should be fine for you to tell them. I can’t control what you do, though, so do whatever you want, I guess.”
“Okay,” he said, “so rule two: keep it on the down-low.”
You nodded your head at him, “I have a suggestion for rule three.”
“Go ahead.”
“We can do some PDA, but kissing is unnecessary.”
“Sounds good.”
“Okay,” you continued, “rule four: if we need to ‘break up’ for any serious reason before the dance, that’s okay. We just need to let the other person know before we stage a break up.”
Jungwon nodded again, then turned his head to the left, “My class is over this way. We can message later about this.”
“Okay, see you.”
Jungwon walked into the classroom on the left and within moments, Wonyoung made her way to your side.
“Where did you come from?” You asked, surprised at her presence.
“I was walking behind you this whole time. Since when did you start going this way?”
You shrugged, “Since now.”
She painted a cheeky smile on her face, “And?”
“And what?”
“Don’t think I didn’t see you walking with Jungwon, Y/N! What was that about?!”
You feigned innocence, “Oh, nothing. Y’know.”
“I don’t,” she said, smiling widely, “I really don’t. Spill.”
“Well,” you replied, “I dunno, what do you think?”
“I think you two should date.”
You offered no response and just let your face form into a smile. Wonyoung’s eyes widened at you, “Y/N L/N. Don’t tell me.”
“Tell you what?” You responded with a smirk.
“There’s no way!” She freaked out, “You guys are dating?!”
“Possibly.”
“Y/N! I’m so happy!” Wonyoung smiled at you and grabbed your hand and gave it a squeeze. This was the most excited you’d ever seen her.
“I am too.” You said, “Could you maybe keep it on the down-low for now though? It’s really new.”
“Yeah, of course! Can I tell Taesan?”
“Go ahead, yeah,” you smiled at her, “I think he’d be pretty stoked too.”
Wonyoung pulled out her phone to text her boyfriend and a small silence settled between you two. Wonyoung was the first to break the silence once she sent the message:
“So, I was right about you two being cute together.”
You laughed, “Whatever helps you sleep at night, Wonyoung.”
ix. MAKE UP YOUR MIND
It was already a week and a half into the fake relationship and you felt like your sanity was slowly slipping away from you.
Jungwon played soccer all year long, you’d learned, and you’d started going to his games and practices. Aside from the practices as a whole being excruciatingly boring, the games weren’t bad at all. You had to admit, Jungwon was good at what he did. He had four practices during the week and two on the weekend. In the time since you’d started going to see Jungwon outside of school hours, you’d learned that he could be tolerable sometimes. Emphasis on ‘sometimes’.
You’d also learned that he was a very good actor. His teammates immediately accepted you as Jungwon’s girlfriend, and as a result, you’d earned an honorific position on the team.
It definitely helped that you could make small talk and pre-event plans when Jungwon drove you places in his expensive car. His car was probably more expensive than your family’s whole apartment.
But here you were, sitting on the bleachers at around 7pm on Tuesday night, watching Jungwon and his teammates practice. There were only about fifteen minutes left of practice, and then you were free to go home and potentially regret every decision you’d ever made.
The bright lights of the field were giving you a headache and you weren’t sure how much longer you’d be able to handle this. You took a look at where Jungwon was located on the field, taking note of his focused face as he listened to his coach. Jungwon was one of the better players on the team, and it was evident to you because of the way he talked so passionately about the game. You hated to admit, but it was nice to see him talk so fondly about something for once rather than make unprovoked mean comments towards you.
Around five minutes later, Jungwon and the team suddenly dispersed from their coach and walked towards their bags. You rested your chin on your hand and watched his figure start making its way towards you. He slung his bag over his shoulder and jogged slowly to your spot on the bleachers.
Once he reached the barrier between you and the field, he sighed, “Hey.”
“Hi,” you said, “how was practice?”
Ever since you’d started ‘dating’ Jungwon, you’d made a point to try (at the very least) to be kind to him, even if it wasn’t in front of other people. You hoped that maybe through being kind to him, it might make him be kind back. Hopefully that would make the whole fake dating process a whole lot easier.
“It was fine,” he was short with his answer, yet not necessarily cold for once, “I’m tired.”
“You look like it.” You stood up from your spot on the bleachers and walked towards the barrier to meet Jungwon in the middle.
He checked his watch, “It’s good that we got out early. I have a shit ton of Calc work to do.”
Walking out from behind the barrier, you met Jungwon. He started walking to his car and you quickly followed.
“The packet?” You questioned, picking up the pace to match with his.
You and all your classmates had your work packet that was due the following day, which was Friday. You had already finished the packet a couple days ago and had turned it into your teacher, wanting to get it off of your mind if it was out of your sight.
“Yeah,” he said, “do you have the answers?”
“I don’t have them, no,” you admitted, “I already turned my packet.”
“Shit,” he quietly exclaimed, “I don’t know how to do most of them.”
“Oh,” you replied, “I do. I’m sorry that I don’t have answers.”
“It’s fine,” he rolled his eyes.
Suddenly, it looked like Jungwon got an idea.
He turned to you, “Wait. Are you doing anything after this?”
You racked your brain to think of anything, but nothing came to mind. You turned to look at him, “No, I don’t think so.”
“Do you wanna come over and help me?”
“To your house?” You questioned.
“Yeah,” he said, confused, “where else?”
“Oh,” you said, surprised, “are you sure you’d want me there?”
“It’s fine,” he replied, “it’s just this once.”
“I mean I guess so…” you pondered, “I don’t know. It’s a school night.”
Jungwon checked his watch again, “It’s only 7:09, I don’t think it should be too bad. Unless you have a curfew?”
“I don’t…” you admitted, “I guess I could help you. But I don’t want to make you drive me there and then have to drive me all the way back home. You already picked me up, plus it’s out of the way for you.”
“Consider me driving you as a payment for you helping me… I really need the help, and would appreciate it. You’re smart.”
For the first time ever, Jungwon complimented you. It left you in a state of shock, to put it simply; you had never expected to hear Jungwon compliment you, even while fake dating.
“Thanks,” you said, “I’ll help you.”
He said nothing more as the two of you finally reached his car. He loaded his soccer bag into the back of the car and opened the drivers side door, beckoning for you to do the same.
“I don’t live far from here,” he started the car, “so it’ll be a quick drive.”
You nodded in your spot while Jungwon reversed out of his parking spot. He shifted the car into drive and quickly pulled out of the school parking lot.
Like Jungwon said, the drive was extremely quick. It was only around three minutes, so Jungwon didn’t even bother putting on the radio. He opted instead to roll down the window and not speak.
You really shouldn’t have been surprised by Jungwon’s family estate. Given just by how much money his car seemed to cost, the grandeur of his home should not have come as a shock to you. But it still did.
The gate at the beginning of the driveway seemed inviting; it looked purposefully worn down. The somewhat dingy look of something that was probably not even a year old welcomed you in, in a sense.
The driveway looked freshly paved, the black color not ever changing from erosion. There wasn’t a single crack in the pavement, and it was lined with white pillars that had lamp light illuminating from the top.
Further up the driveway, you could see four other cars. Thinking about the total cost of all the vehicles combined sent a shiver down your spine.
The house itself, which was to the left, could barely even get by being called a “house”. It was easily more than ten times the size of your family’s apartment, and if not for the trees that surrounded it, you’d assume it was a lot taller than it actually was.
The brick was white and the front of the house had pillars driving up and down to support a black roof. The lights in the house were off, giving a stark contrast to the otherwise homely feel of the entrance.
Jungwon pulled the car into the parking spot closest to the house. Once parked, he loaded himself out and went to the back seat to grab his soccer gear.
“No one’s home but us,” he said, “but my parents have cameras everywhere, so we’ll go through the garage. Leave your shoes on the doormat.”
Jungwon led you through the garage, then into the large kitchen, followed by a large living space. He then flipped on a light switch and walked you to the foyer, which was a high-ceilinged room with white walls and stairs that cascaded towards the second floor. The balcony of the second floor overlooked the foyer, and there was a large chandelier hung at the top of the ceiling.
Jungwon beckoned you towards the hardwood steps, “My room’s upstairs.”
Your attention was brought away from the chandelier and you followed as Jungwon ascended the steps towards his room. At the top of the steps, there was a hallway that extended both left and right, and there was also the other side of the balcony.
This side of the balcony overlooked a different living space, but you didn’t get a good look at it before Jungwon tried to disappear out of your sight towards the right hand side of the hallway.
He passed by a few rooms with closed doors before opening the door to the final one on the right. Jungwon walked in first and left the door open for you to enter.
His room was just as large as you anticipated it to be, with large windows on two sides of the room and a king-sized mattress in the corner of the space. You bit back any comments about the size of his bed; he was a short man, why did he need that much space?
Jungwon turned on the lamp next to his bed and dropped his soccer bags at the foot of the bedframe. His backpack was lying right in front of the bedside table, already opened. You could assume that he’d already tried to start the Calculus work yet failed. Hence why you’d needed to come over to help.
Jungwon sat on the edge of the bed and pulled his backpack onto it. You stood very awkwardly in front of him, not sure what to do; you were almost waiting for instruction from him.
Jungwon scooted back on the bed with his backpack to make room for you. He beckoned towards the now empty seat for you to sit on. You carefully sat on the edge of the bed, not even turning your knees to face his body.
“You look really weird right now.” Here came back the Jungwon you were used to, the one who threw out any sort of comment he could at you.
“I’m sorry,” you said, turning back to him, “I’m trying to be cautious. I’m afraid you might insult me if I so much as lay a finger on your comforter.”
Jungwon, without you noticing, rolled his eyes. He sighed, “You can sit further back on my bed. I don’t bite.”
“I just don’t believe you, to be honest.” You remarked back at him.
Sighing again, albeit more frustratedly this time, Jungwon caught you by surprise by grabbing your wrist closest to him and slightly tugging you further back on his bed.
“I don’t care if you don’t believe me,” he said, “I need your help. I won’t bite so long as you’re helping me.”
You finally turned to face him, taking note of how much closer you two were sat now that he had pulled your wrist. You looked down at his hand still wrapped around your wrist. He quickly removed his hand.
Adjusting yourself, you turned to face Jungwon on his bed, watching him pull out a binder, a pencil, and a calculator. He opened the binder, searching for a familiar white packet: the same one that’d you’d turned in earlier that week.
You tucked a piece of hair behind your ear and leaned over slightly to look at the problem that he was caught on. Jungwon noticed how you were sat across from him, and thereby couldn’t properly read the problem. He scooted his body more to the left of you and moved his binder so you could read.
The problem that Jungwon had attempted last had lots and lots of erased pencil marks all over it; he had clearly been struggling with it. You remembered also struggling with the same problem, but not nearly as much as he did.
“So this is one of the ones you’re struggling with?” You questioned, looking at him.
“Yeah,” he rolled his eyes, “I feel like she made this a lot harder than it should’ve been.”
“I had a hard time with this one, too, if it makes you feel any better.” You reassured him. Motioning to his calculator, you continued, “Why don’t you walk me through the steps of what you’re doing? Then I can show you what I did.”
Roughly fifteen minutes later and there were still eraser marks decorating the paper, yet not nearly as much as there were before. Jungwon was still confused, but had successfully worked through half of the problem he was caught on.
Jungwon groaned for what seemed like the hundredth time when you caught another mistake of his, “This is so stupid.”
“Hey,” you laughed, “I’m just trying to help you.”
“You know I didn’t mean you.”
There it was again, another positive comment from Jungwon, and this one sent a special beat through your heart. You chalked it up to just being not used to this side of Jungwon, not anything more.
“It’s okay,” you reassured, “I told you that I also struggled with this one. It’s not you, it’s the problem.”
You weren’t sure what came over you, but with the sudden kindness from Jungwon, you felt the need to return the gesture.
“I know,” he groaned, “I know. I just want to finish this problem. I have like four more to do that are the exact same thing.”
Jungwon flopped back on his bed, covering his face with his hands. You slightly laughed at the boy; all that big, tough act just for him to crumble at a math problem.
“Why are you laughing?” Jungwon whined, not amused. He removed his hands from his face to look at you.
“I’m not,” you tried concealing your laughter, “I’m not. I swear.”
“You’re laughing at me,” he said, “I’m about to drop out of school and you’re laughing at me.”
“Don’t be dramatic,” you replied, “it’s just one math problem. Wanna take a break with me?”
“…Maybe.”
You got off of Jungwon’s bed and started, “Come on, get up.”
“Actually, changed my mind, I’d rather die here than take a break with you.”
Though his words seemed harsh, you could tell there were hints of joking in his tone. You smiled naturally at him, “Fine, be like that. I’ll just leave.”
“You don’t have a ride home, need I remind you.”
“But I have a phone,” you teased, pulling your phone out of your pocket, “and I have people I can call. Like Gyuvin or Minji.”
Jungwon sat up finally, tilting his head at you, “Who are they?”
You didn’t even realize that you’d mentioned your childhood friends with Jungwon; you had been so oddly comfortable in the moment that you’d just let their names leave your mouth.
“Oh, uh-” you started, looking down, “just, uh, friends from my old school.”
You braced yourself for him to make fun of your ‘poor’ friends as usual, but nothing came from his direction of the room. You looked back up at him to find him with the same expression he’d had while asking you about them.
“What did you want to take a break for?” He inquired.
“Oh, I didn’t need it,” you said, “I thought you might’ve needed it.”
“Oh.”
A blanket of silence temporarily fell over the room until Jungwon broke the quiet atmosphere, “Didn’t know you had it in you to be so caring.”
“Maybe you’d know if you didn’t try to get under my skin all the time,” you remarked, with hints of teasing, “I’m actually quite the caring person, you’d be surprised.”
“I’m not.”
You had no time to process what he’d said before he spoke again:
“Let’s get back to work. I need to focus so you don’t stay here any longer than you have to.”
And just like that, Jungwon was back to his normal self.
x. I ALMOST SAID “I LOVE YOU”
The next following weeks that were leading up to the dance passed quicker in a blur than you’d like to admit they had; it seemed like just yesterday you had started fake-dating Jungwon, but in actuality it was coming up on around a month and a half.
In the time that you two had been “dating”, you’d become familiar with the soccer team, had gone to his house on multiple occasions, and even met his mother once.
Another uncertain familiarity had also made itself known: you were beginning to get used to being with Jungwon.
There had been many different occasions in which you’d felt yourself especially having let your walls down to the boy, and as more weeks passed of being “together”, the moments became much more frequent.
In particular, the last week had been particularly eventful for you.
The first strange event had occurred on Tuesday evening, when Jungwon, Wonyoung, Taesan, and you had all gone to the mall after school. Wonyoung was in need of some sort of new fur jacket for a family company event, or so she said. You had tagged along to help her find something suitable to wear, and she had told you that it was of the utmost importance that you were with her.
Taesan had joined because he wanted to pay for Wonyoung’s coat, being the caring boyfriend that he was. Taesan had also extended to invite to Jungwon to create the illusion of a double date.
While Wonyoung was in the fitting room of an expensive French store with a name you couldn’t even try to pronounce, Taesan had told you that he would hold onto the current items you had in hand and told you to try find some more different ones on the other side of the store. You happily obliged, loving the feeling of window shopping in a place you could never afford.
To your surprise, Jungwon had joined you without you asking or Taesan offering the idea to him.
The two of you quickly found yourselves in the coat designated area of the store, and you told Jungwon that you two should divide and conquer.
He listened to you, and set off in the opposite direction of where you were.
The first coat that caught your eye was cream colored, with what felt like a velvet inside and a chiffon outside. The sleeves and collar were decorated with what you could only guess was arctic fox fur. You loved Wonyoung, but you had a hard time getting behind her family’s necessity of wearing animal fur. It sent a shiver down your spine.
Looking at the price tag, it read $1,205. Your jaw slightly dropped, forgetting how truly expensive it was in there. You grabbed the jacket nonetheless, and started to make your way to try and find Jungwon.
Out of the corner of your eye, a glint of diamond found you.
You knew that you should have been getting back to Wonyoung.
But one look wouldn’t hurt, right?
You stalked your way up to the glass display slowly and spotted the most gorgeous pairs of earrings you’d ever seen in your entire lifetime. Next to the diamond pair that’d initially caught your eye, there was a beautiful silver chained necklace with what appeared to be a green gemstone encased in the center. It had to be the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen.
The employee noticed your wonder and walked over to speak to you.
“Hello,” the middle aged woman started, “see anything that you like, sweetheart?”
“Oh, uh-” you were startled, “Sorry. I was just looking.”
“I understand. We have a wonderful selection of jewelry. Are you looking at anything in particular?”
You shook your head, “No, um, I can’t. I’m here with a friend. This is way out of my price range.”
“I see, dear,” she said, pulling her glasses down from her head and placing them on her nose, “but that’s not what I was asking. Which one caught your eye?”
“Oh,” you laughed awkwardly, “I liked the diamond earrings a lot. The necklace with the small green gemstone is what kept me staring, though.”
“That’s a very popular one, the green gemstone. It’s a Colombian emerald.”
“It’s absolutely beautiful. If I had a job like this, I’d just spend all day looking at all the jewelry.”
The lady nodded, “As do I now.”
Suddenly, Jungwon appeared behind you, slightly startling you. You whipped around to see what seemed to be a concerned look.
“Hi,” you said, “I found something for Wonyoung.”
“I can see that,” he responded, looking down at the coat, then back at you, “but I was hoping more for you to find me. Taesan messaged me, asking where we were, because Wonyoung is still ‘hopeless’.”
“Oh,” you stuttered, “I got distracted. Thank you,” you turned to the woman as you started walking away, “and sorry about that,” you looked at Jungwon, “I got really distracted.”
“Yeah,” he slightly laughed, “I could have told you that. You should’ve answered your phone, I was worried.”
He was worried?
“You texted me?” You asked him.
Jungwon was worried?
“And called.”
Jungwon said he was worried.. about you. Weird.
You tried to ignore the slight skip in your heartbeat as you walked with him back to the fitting rooms.
xi. TO SIP IT SLOWLY
The next strange occurrence was the following Thursday night.
As a celebratory event, Jungwon’s soccer team decided to have a party in honor of their hard work (and just to party).
It was no surprise that a group of boys like Jungwon’s soccer team would host an obnoxious party. It reminded you of the ones that came out of movies; there was plenty of underaged drinking, it was too loud, and shitty music was blasting from a speaker that was a room over.
The party was in full swing by the time that you had arrived, which was about an hour after it was said to have started. The reason for your tardiness could have been chalked up to one person only: Gyuvin. As an apology for him causing you to be late, he offered to drive you to the location where the party was being held.
You had tried texting Jungwon multiple times on your way to the party, but, to no avail, he didn’t answer. This alone nearly caused you to forget about even showing up.
You sent him one last text — “just arrived. Wya?” — before leaving Gyuvin’s car and walking up the lawn of the house. While you went to the door (alone), you repeatedly checked your phone to see if Jungwon had messaged you back:
No.
The front door was unlocked when you reached it, and the foyer was empty. From a couple rooms away, you could hear music being blasted from a speaker. Hoping for the best, you decided to follow your gut and head that way.
The music was coming from the basement, which was down a hall then through a door that led to a flight of stairs. As you approached closer and closer to the basement door, you braced yourself for the potential of going deaf.
With still no text back from Jungwon, you opened the door and began walking down the stairs towards the main event of the party.
The first girl to acknowledge your presence was a girl named Noh Yunah, who was best friends with the girl who hosted the party: Park Minju. Minju was in a long term relationship with Anton Lee, the head captain of the team.
“Hey,” Yunah started, “you’re Y/N, right?”
“Yeah,” you made your way to stand next to her. Yelling over the music, you continued, “I am. You’re Noh Yunah?”
“I am!” Yunah smiled at you. “Where’s Jungwon?”
You slightly flushed at the sound of his name. You forgot that everyone here was in relation to the soccer team somehow, so of course they’d only know you as Jungwon’s girlfriend.
“Beats me,” you laughed, “I texted him earlier but he didn’t respond.”
“Weird,” Yunah responded, “I’m pretty sure that he was talking about you earlier. I just assumed that you two would have shown up together.”
“Yeah,” you said. Looking past Yunah, you couldn’t see anyone that resembled Jungwon. Sighing, you continued, “I had plans beforehand though. They unfortunately made me late.”
“Girl, I understand,” she laughed, “I hate these stupid parties most of the time. If I had other plans, I’d rather be there. Unfortunately, everyone that I’m friends with is here. I’m just glad there’s another girl.”
Suddenly, Park Minju made herself known from beside Yunah. She smiled, “I’m so relieved that you came, Y/N. Jungwon never stops talking about you at lunch. I needed to meet you finally so he would shut up.”
You laughed awkwardly, not sure if she was being nice or if it was a backhanded compliment. Either way, both girls were right; it was a complete relief to have other girls there.
But their behavior kind of puzzled you, too. Had the three of you been in a school setting, they probably wouldn’t have looked twice at you. If they did, it probably would’ve been to make a snarky comment.
Okay, maybe you were being too harsh on these girls. You’d never met them before.
But, in the same breath, you could never truly be too sure about Ivy Hills students.
Minju looked at your awkward stance, then laughed, “Do you want a drink?”
“Oh,” you started, “no. I don’t drink. Thank you though.”
“Suit yourself.” Minju raised a teasing eyebrow and smiled, then walking away to the big circle of people in the middle of the room — that same Jungwon-less circle you’d seen earlier.
Yunah looked at you, “Are you okay?”
You snapped out of your thoughts, “Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. Just, um… wondering where Jungwon is.”
“Hey,” she grabbed you by your wrist and pulled you closer so you could hear her better, “Sorry about Minju. I swear she likes you. She just doesn’t do well with new people.”
You nodded and let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding in, “That’s good to know. I think I might actually take her up on her drinking offer, though. Is there anything non-alcoholic?”
Yunah bit her lip, “I’m not sure. Everything’s in the kitchen. Want me to come check with you?”
“No,” you reassured, “I’ll be fine. Thank you, though.”
You left Yunah and ventured back up the stairs towards where the kitchen was, which was off the hall. There were a few people in there already, looking into coolers and what you could assume was Minju’s parents’ liquor cabinet.
You crouched by a cooler with no one nearby and fished through it, looking for something tame, like a soda. Your best bet was either a safe ginger ale or something new: a Jack Daniels wine cooler.
You didn’t know anyone at the party.. and you had school the following morning, that you couldn’t risk skipping. But maybe one wine cooler wouldn’t be that bad…
You stood up from your crouching position and walked to the kitchen counter where you placed your drink. Cracking it open, you took your first sip.
Suddenly, your phone buzzed in your pocket with a text from someone you had been waiting on:
Jungwon.
It was a simple text — “Hey” — but you felt your heart skip a beat. Perhaps the alcohol had entered your system quickly.
You quickly responded — “Where are you??” — to his text and placed your phone face down, leaning your back against the counter to face the open doorway.
As if on cue, a familiar lean figure walked through the doorway, almost making you choke on nothing. Unknowingly, your face broke into a little smile of relief.
Jungwon nodded to whoever the other people were in the room (who were still scavenging for drinks) before walking over to you.
“Where have you been?” You questioned teasingly once he made his way over to you.
“Oh, around, y’know.”
You rolled your eyes at him.
“I was out on the back porch with some of my teammates, why?” He looked at you, “You missed me?”
“You wish,” you laughed, “but no. I don’t know anyone here. I kind of need you here in order for it to make any remote sense of me being here.”
“Fair enough,” he shrugged. Jungwon glanced at your drink, then furrowed his eyebrows, “You been drinking?”
“It’s my first and probably last. We have school tomorrow, so even though I wanna fit in, I wanna keep my scholarship more than that.”
Jungwon chuckled at your words, “Smart girl, I guess. Wanna go downstairs?”
“We can, yeah,” you said.
Jungwon pushed himself off of the counter and led you back downstairs to the basement, but this time to the large crowd. They were all still sat in a circle, but the music was softer this time.
A couple of (assumed) teammates called out Jungwon’s name as he walked to find a spot in the circle, leading you with him. The two of you found a spot on one of the couches at the end. The spot had enough space for one person, but you and Jungwon squished to both be able to sit. He offered for you to sit on his lap, but you declined. The alcohol was making your face red enough.
You sat between Jungwon and one of his friends, Junhyuk, who everyone called “Win” for some reason. Assuming he played for a school team and was the star player, that would make sense. But you still thought it was weird nonetheless.
The conversation was still flying at a million miles per hour once you’d sat down, and you didn’t expect to really understand anything. Your main goal was to just sit there nicely and then go home once Jungwon left.
The last thing you’d expected to happen was Jungwon to slowly slither his right arm around your waist and place his hand on your hip nonchalantly. Your eyes widened at the occurrence, but Jungwon seemed unfazed.
Junhyuk was very obviously drinking and had been for some time, so when he leaned over jokingly and asked how “serious” you and Jungwon were, you weren’t exactly shocked that he’d made a comment about you two, especially given that your “relationship” was the most recently established.
A couple other people had overheard Junhyuk’s comment and laughed, causing Jungwon to raise an eyebrow at them.
“We’re very serious, Junhyuk, thank you for asking.” Jungwon commented with hints of snark in his voice, “And, also, thank you for hitting on my girlfriend! Just reminded me that I have the most beautiful woman this school has ever seen!”
“If she’s so pretty,” Junhyuk laughed, “why don’t you share? Especially if you know how much other people want her.”
You furrowed your eyebrows, there was no way he just said that. Another drunkard called from across the circle, “Jungwon, I’ll give you $40 if you trade places with me for the night.”
Jungwon’s pride turned into disgust within milliseconds, “My girlfriend is not an object. I will never let her around gross low-lives like you both if you ever say any bullshit like that again.”
Jungwon tightened his grasp around your waist. He then pulled you to be sitting on his lap, so that you wouldn’t have to be sitting next to Junhyuk anymore.
He whispered in your ear, “Sorry for making you come here.”
However, the boys’ drunk comments were deafened in comparison to the way Jungwon had your heart beating.
You were so fucked.
xii. BUT I DONT GET BORED
The final occurrence actually happened the following day during your math class.
Many of the people that you were mingling with the previous night decided not to go to school the following day — which would be today — and unluckily for you, you didn’t have that option, so you sat quietly in your Calculus class like normal.
Jungwon, to your surprise, had decided not to skip school like most of his friends and teammates, so he was sat quietly in your Calculus class, too.
Around two weeks prior, your teacher had decided to change up the seating chart of the classroom, sending Jungwon nearly all the way across the room from you.
You were almost 100% sure that it was because your teacher had seen the two of you passing notes during lectures, but because she never mentioned anything to the either of you, you couldn’t be sure.
You took a peek at where Jungwon was situated on the other side of the room just for you to notice him already looking at you.
You gave him a little smile, but then quickly turned to look at your teacher instead.
The AP tests for the majority of your classes had already happened, but your final AP exam was on the following Monday, which meant your teacher was doubling down on the review work and studying for you and your classmates.
Your teacher had randomly assigned everyone into either A team or B team, and today’s review session was to be a team vs. team test. You were hoping that by some miracle, Jungwon would get sorted into the same team as you; the two smartest people in the class — and in your whole grade, for that measure — being on the same team meant a guaranteed win for that team.
But, unluckily for you, he got assigned to B team, and you were stuck in A team. Once the sorting was complete, Jungwon caught your eye from across the room and mouthed a quick “sorry” while frowning.
You gave him a small smile that said “it’s okay” before turning to your teammates.
The desks had been pushed all together but separated in the middle (to distinguish between the two teams’ spaces) to create more space for everyone to “work together”.
You knew damn well in your mind that “working together” for your team most likely meant that they would make you (and maybe one other smart person if you were lucky) do all the equations and then just take credit for your work.
Your hunch was proven correct when you were onto your fourth problem in the process with the teams at 1-2. Your team was winning, but you were beginning to stress. If B team finished the equation first, the teams would be tied up.
Even though the exercise was supposed to be “fun”, it seemed to be fun for everyone except for you. The feeling of roughly 6 or 7 classmates breathing down your neck in wait of you finishing a problem only made you want a cry.
Moments later, a member from B team stood up and ran to the teacher to show her the answer and the work done. While all your classmates were watching in anticipation to see if she got the answer or not, you continued to work on the problem. You couldn’t join them in watching, because on the off chance that she made a mistake in her work, you needed to be prepared to swoop in with correctly done work at any moment.
Alas, to your dismay, your teacher chimed the bell that signified a correct answer.
One of your teammates gave you a dirty look.
Trying your best to ignore them, you focused onto the whiteboard and waited for your teacher to write down the final problem of the competition.
It didn’t take long for you to be reimmersed into the world of Calculus and try your hardest to finish the problem first. It wasn’t easy to focus when your teammates were breathing down your neck, though.
Roughly fifteen minutes later, you had nearly completed the problem when your opponent, Leehan, quickly ran up to your teacher to hand her the answer sheet with his work.
While she was grading the work, your teammate, Haruto, was urging you to finish while cursing under his breath at you, but not quietly enough for you to not be able to hear.
The bell chimed, signifying your team lost.
A cheer erupted from the other side of the classroom while Haruto snatched the paper from you and crumbled it up. He rolled his eyes, “Nice work, trailer trash. You’re more stupid than I thought.”
From the corner of your eye, you noticed Jungwon’s neck snap in Haruto’s direction.
While his team was cheering, Jungwon decided that instead of joining in, he would make sure he didn’t just hear what he thought he did from Haruto.
“What did you just call her, Watanabe?”
At this point, not only did you and Haruto notice Jungwon, but the majority of your teammates did, too. While some opted to pretend they didn’t see anything, some of the other ones turned their full attention to the interaction.
“Why do you give a fuck, Yang? You’re not on this team, so you shouldn’t even care that she made us lose. You won.”
“Maybe I did, but if you wanted to win, you should’ve helped her, instead of standing there like the bum that you are,” Jungwon scoffed, “because it’s no secret, Haruto, that you’re a lazy loser who rides off other people’s success to create your own.”
Haruto’s face morphed into an unrecognizable expression.
Jungwon continued, “In case you didn’t notice, your ‘personal math problem-solver’ here was doing the work with you breathing your hot breath down her neck.”
Catching more people’s attention now, he raised his voice a bit, “None of you did anything and you’re complaining that you lost. Y/N is lucky that exams are solo activities because she definitely won’t need any of you to rely on for answers. I’m glad that at least one person in this class is smart-”
Your teacher cut him off, “Yang Jungwon, that’s enough. Please go take a seat.”
Once Jungwon sat down, you couldn’t help yourself from sneaking a look at Haruto’s face, which hasn’t even changed a bit since Jungwon insulted him.
You laughed to yourself, thinking about Jungwon. Maybe losing wasn’t so bad after all if that was the result.
xiii. NEVER KNEW I COULD FEEL THIS MUCH
The sudden comfort that you had found in the man you once despised terrified you.
It terrified you so much to the point of you declining Wonyoung to a hang-out twice this weekend, for fear of Jungwon being there.
You were sure that by the third time, Wonyoung could tell what was up. So, it didn’t entirely surprise you when she showed up at your family’s apartment door that same night she texted you.
“You have a bit of explaining to do,” she started once you opened the door to her.
“Hello to you too.”
Wonyoung stepped past you to walk toward your room, you trailing behind her by a few paces. You watched as she sat herself right on your bed and sent you a look that said ‘sit here’.
Once you sat, she immediately started, “Why have you been avoiding hanging out with me?”
“I haven’t,” you lied through your teeth, “I’ve just been… busy.”
She furrowed her brows at you, “Busy with what? Your boyfriend?”
You tensed subconsciously at the word, but responded, “No… just school, I guess. Even though AP tests are over, I still have some schoolwork.”
Wonyoung squinted, “Like what?”
“Just… papers and stuff.”
“You’re a bad liar,” she complained, “but whatever. If you don’t want to tell me, that’s okay. I won’t prod.”
You nodded thankfully at her, looking away, “If it makes you feel any better, I haven’t seen any other friends.”
She laughed, rolling her eyes and standing up, “No, Y/N, that doesn’t make me feel any better. That makes me feel depressed on your behalf.”
You sent her an annoyed look.
“Anyway, since I’m already here, we should go do something. I miss my best friend.”
You smiled a little at her and also stood up.
As if on cue, you received a text from Jungwon:
Wanna go do something fun tonight?
xiv. LOST TRACK OF TIME AND SPACE
That Saturday after, you were once again with Minji and Gyuvin in your family’s apartment. This time, you weren’t being dramatic or even complaining about Jungwon. Instead, Minji decided to bring up the man herself.
“Y/N, I saw on your story last night that you went to a party.”
“Yeah,” you started, “I did, so what?”
“Since when are you a party person?” Gyuvin butted in, antagonizing you.
“I’m not, obviously,” you sighed, “I hid in the bathroom for most of it anyways. It was loud and obnoxious, and I only went because Jungwon asked me to go as his date.”
“Hm,” Minji hummed, “seems like he’s pretty serious about you, given that he asked you to go as his date to a party.”
“What’s even funnier is you went!” Gyuvin laughed from his spot on your bed.
“What’s so funny about that?” You interrogated, snapping your neck to look at him.
“Nothing, nothing.”
You shook your head at him, rolling your eyes slightly. Minji spoke next, “It is a bit funny. Y/N L/N, the well-known party-goer.”
“Look, I only went because he asked, okay? You guys both know damn well that I wouldn’t have gone otherwise.” You scoffed, surprised at their audacity.
Minji laughed, “And since when are you one to listen to what Yang Jungwon asks of you? The Y/N that I know wouldn’t have said yes in a million years.”
“It was important to him, okay,” You replied, “and he was insisting that I go. For public image reasons.”
“And now you care about what’s important to him,” Gyuvin piped up, “the plot thickens!”
You sighed, “It’s really not as big of a deal as you guys are making it out to be.”
“Listen, Y/N,” Gyuvin continued, “never did I ever think that you would ever go to a party, let alone with someone you claim to ‘hate’. I think you’re starting to like him.”
Minji laughed and you widened your eyes as you felt your face slightly flush at the thought. Was it that obvious?
“Oh my god, Gyuvin is totally right! Y/N, you liiiiike Yang Jungwon!” Minji sang to you.
“I do not,” you felt yourself retort like an elementary-aged school girl, “I do not! I swear it’s nothing. We’re just fake dating and that’s it.”
Minji kept laughing, “Sureeeee, Y/N. We both believe you!” She continued taunting you, high-fiving Gyuvin.
“You guys are so sick for this…” you grumbled, trying to push away your feelings for Jungwon further down.
“You’re just mad we’re never wrong,” Gyuvin said, “oh, and, by the way, you only have a week until you get your money.”
You felt your eyes slightly widen and your heart skip a beat or two.
Had time really flown by that quickly?
xv. HARDER TO HIDE THAN I THOUGHT
Two days had passed and you were scheduled to attend a double date with your “boyfriend”, Wonyoung, and Taesan. It was, pretty obviously, Wonyoung’s idea. But, because you didn’t want Jungwon to assume you suddenly hated him, you agreed to go.
Around an hour before the date, Jungwon suddenly texted you — “Hey, I’m omw to get you a bit early. I wanna talk before we see them” — and you felt your soul temporarily leave your body.
You and Jungwon hadn’t talked very often in the past week, because you had been avoiding him like the plague, trying to deny and drown out your feelings towards him.
Jungwon didn’t live too far from you, but it was far enough that you had at least fifteen minutes to freak out about his text message.
What could he possibly want? Was he going to confront you about avoiding him? What would you say, if that was the case?
You ran to the bathroom to touch up your outfit, makeup, and hair quickly, not wanting to present yourself badly in front of him. As in denial as you were, a small part of you knew that you did like the boy, and wanted to look pretty for him.
You were wearing a fairly plain outfit:
A white lace cami under a red short sleeve shirt, some secondhand baggy jeans, and some old clogs from your mother. You sported the look with an old (most likely faux) brown leather jacket from your father.
As for your hair, it was loosely braided into two braids and tied with a ribbon. You pulled some hair out to give it a more “effortless” look, but you were slightly afraid it came off as you trying too hard.
Your makeup was minimal, but this left you worried you did too little. You added slight highlights to the inner corners of your eyes to make them pop.
Arriving 10 minutes earlier than you anticipated, you heard a knock at the door, knowing immediately who it was. You looked over yourself one last time before leaving the bathroom.
As soon as you opened the door, Jungwon’s once grim face lit up at the sight of you, “You look nice.”
“Thanks, I like to think so too, sometimes.”
He scanned your whole body and face before slightly smiling. He cleared his throat before asking, “Ready to go?”
You nodded, shutting the apartment door behind you, not bothering to lock it, as both of your parents were home at the hour. You laughed slightly, “Where are you taking me?”
Jungwon, leading the way down the steps towards the bottom landing of the apartment building, turned back for a split second to say, “It’s a surprise.”
Roughly another fifteen minutes later, Jungwon parked his car. He unbuckled his seatbelt and said, “We’re here.”
You followed suit and once out of the car you looked around, “Where are we?”
“East Eden Park.”
Jungwon smiled at you as he started walking up a hill, beckoning for you to follow.
“Okay, why are we here?” You asked, your tone slightly laced with panic as you walked behind.
Jungwon looked over his shoulder at you, “I’ll explain when we get up to the top.”
Suddenly, you had the genius idea to beat him to the top. Smirking, you said, “Race you.”
Before Jungwon even had a second to register what you said, you took off up the hill and managed to get many paces ahead of him before he started running too.
To your surprise, you ended up beating him up the hill, to which you cheered in victory, “I win! I win! You suck!”
Jungwon laughed as he finally reached the top of the hill, “Okay, bragger.”
You settled down your laughing and cheering to take in the view around you, widening your eyes at the sight. It took your breath away momentarily, “Wow, this place is amazing. You can see the whole downtown area from here.”
“Isn’t it?” Jungwon asked, as he reached to be next to you.
The sun had just started to set over the horizon of the city, making the perfect spot to watch the sunset.
“This is oddly romantic,” you laughed, awkwardly, “thanks for taking me here.”
“You’re welcome. Will you take a seat on the grass so we can talk?”
You immediately sat down in your spot, “You don’t have to ask me that twice.”
Jungwon also sat next to you, so close that your hands almost touched. If not for the rules that you two had made, you would’ve reached and grabbed his hand. But deep down, you knew you’d strangle yourself if you ever broke the unspoken fifth rule:
Don’t catch feelings.
Sighing to yourself, you trained your sights on a familiar building. You nudged Jungwon, “Hey, did you know that’s where my dad works?”
“Wait, which one? Your pointing skills suck.”
“Right there, second to the right on the bottom. Big brown building.”
Jungwon squinted his eyes, still not seeing what you were talking about.
“Dude, the one at the very bottom. Not the gray one.”
Jungwon sighed, “I give up. I can’t see it.”
“Really?” You said, exasperated, “You can’t see the brown building that says ‘Armstrong & Dennis’ above it?”
“Ohhh, I know that one. My dad’s a shareholder in that company.”
You rolled your eyes playfully, “Great. Thanks for reminding me of our societal class difference.”
Jungwon chuckled, nudging you, “You know that’s not what I meant when I said that.”
“Yeah, whatever, rich boy,” you nudged him back, “So, why’d you bring me here?”
“Oh,” he said, reminded of the reason, “I wanted to talk, um, about next week.”
The words Minji and Gyuvin were teasing you with appeared back in your head:
Only one week.
You tensed slightly and laughed, “Oh, I forgot about that.”
He stayed silent.
“So… what did you want to exactly discuss?” You questioned, looking at him. His eyes were still trained on the sunset-stained skyline, not moving. You wondered what he was thinking about.
He broken his silence after a minute, “Just… logistics, I guess.”
“What logistics?” You asked, “I thought it was just that we would go to the dance together, and then ‘break-up’.”
“Well, yeah, but…” he trailed off, not even continuing his sentence.
“But?”
“Y’know what? Never mind. It doesn’t matter,” he sighed, finally looking at you, “because you’re right, we’ve already talked about it. Guess I’m just psyching myself out because I don’t know how Taesan and Wonyoung are going to react.”
“Understandable,” you said, “I mean, I do like hanging out with you though. Or, at least, when you’re nice to me. I’m sure we can stay friends after this whole fiasco is over.”
Jungwon took a long pause.
“Yeah… friends.”
You didn’t respond, instead opting to look at the way the sunset looked that evening, even taking out your phone to snap a photo of it.
You then got an idea, turning to Jungwon, “Wanna take a picture?”
He seemed genuinely surprised at your question, stuttering out a quick “sure” before posing next to you in your picture.
You flipped the camera to selfie mode and posed with a quick peace sign and slightly puckered lips. Jungwon copied your pose, but with a close-mouthed smile instead.
“Okay, wait, one more.” You insisted to him.
This time, you stuck your tongue out and widened your eyes, and he made a screaming face. You both laughed at the funny pictures before Jungwon got a call and picked it up swiftly.
“Yeah, we’re on our way.”
It was all he said before hanging up and standing up, “Hey, let’s go, or we’ll be late for dinner.”
“Okay, okay,” you said, pushing yourself off the ground and following Jungwon to his car.
The next ten minute drive was eerily silent. Not even comfortable silence, but instead a silence that felt like it was sitting on both of your chests— as if there was something that needed to be addressed, but you were both too afraid to acknowledge it.
You let out an unknowing breath of relief when you arrived at the restaurant where Wonyoung and Taesan were already waiting outside for the both of you.
As if on instinct, Jungwon grabbed your hand as you walked towards your friends at the door of the restaurant. You tried to pick up on their conversation, but it seemed like your mind was too foggy to even function that night, with nothing being able to even be clear.
However, there was one thing that night that couldn’t leave your mind:
Jungwon’s grip on your hand felt a little tighter than usual.
xvi. ARE YOU MINE?
One day before the dance, you were with Wonyoung in her family’s mansion and just hanging out as usual. Your conversations had been extremely honed in on the elephant in the room: the dance. Wonyoung tried on her expensive gown for you, and even asked you to help her style it. You two had practiced hairstyles, and even discussed when you would be coming over the following morning to get ready with her.
The dress you had bought was much less glamorous than hers, but even though she offered to let you borrow one of her “family event” dresses, you politely declined, insisting that you go with the dress you bought, because Jungwon liked the color.
Just as you were finishing up a hairstyle YouTube tutorial, you got a sudden call from Jungwon. You turned to Wonyoung, saying, “Hey, I’m gonna take this real quick.”
You walked out into her hallway and then into the guest bathroom to answer the phone.
As soon as you answered, he immediately started rambling, “Hey, Y/N, I know you’re with Wonyoung right now, but is there any way we can meet up late tonight? I have stuff I need to go over with you.”
Trying to understand him through his rambling, you just agreed, telling him to pick you up from Wonyoung’s at 10:30, which was in 15 minutes. You knew for a fact that Wonyoung wouldn’t care, because for one, she would be seeing you tomorrow morning anyways, and for two, you had planned on leaving at 10:30 anyways, but this time it would be Jungwon driving you, and not Wonyoung back home.
As soon as he heard your confirmation, Jungwon immediately hung up. You shook your head a bit, confused.
You walked back into Wonyoung’s room, letting her know that Jungwon would be coming to get you and drive you home. She nodded, still working on fixing her attempted hairstyle.
You went back to one of her mirrors and undid your hairstyle, not wanting to spoil your potential look for the following day, and also not wanting to look dressy from the face up, because you were wearing a baggy tee shirt, athletic shorts, and ankle socks, which would soon be joined by your sandals that were on the bottom floor.
Jungwon sent you a text — “I’m here” — which made you say goodbye to Wonyoung and tell her that you’ll see her tomorrow at 11am. She only waved “bye” as you left, still preoccupied with her hair.
As soon as you slipped out of the front door of the Jang’s, you were immediately met with Jungwon’s car. He rolled down the passenger window and said, “Get in.”
You yawned a bit as you opened the door, not even questioning where he was taking you.
Roughly five minutes went by and you both arrived at your location, which, to your surprise, was the same park that he took you to only a couple days ago.
“‘Welcome to Eden’…” you read the sign as you unloaded yourself from the car.
Jungwon said nothing as he trekked up the hill, leaving you to catch up once again. This time, however, you didn’t race him.
Once at the top of the hill, Jungwon immediately sat down, inviting you to join him. You complied in milliseconds.
A silence again filled the area between you two before you broke it:
“It’s so picture-esque here.”
Jungwon nodded next to you, the lights from the downtown illuminating his expression, which was unreadable.
“So…” you started, “why’d you bring me back here?”
Jungwon took a deep breath, “I just like it here.”
“Wow,” you teased, poking him, “trying to bring me to his favorite places before he breaks my heart. Such a tragic love story.”
You laughed at your own joke, but didn’t fail to notice how Jungwon remained expressionless.
He sighed, “Yeah…”
Another minute of silence befell the two of you, this time you being too afraid to break it.
Out of nowhere, Jungwon started, “Do you think we should keep doing this?”
Caught off guard, you asked “What?”
“Like, fake dating,” he said, “for Wonyoung and Taesan, of course. I feel like it’ll be suspicious if we break up the day after the dance.”
You furrowed your brow, not against the idea, but confused nonetheless, “Uh… sure. But how much longer?”
Jungwon pondered for a moment before coming to a conclusion, “Until it feels right.”
Not daring to turn your head to him, you stared into the abyss with the most confused look of your life, not even sure what to respond with. Instead you fell onto your back, opting to look at the stars above instead of the city ahead.
Shortly after, Jungwon followed suit.
He broke the silence first again, “Which constellation is your favorite?”
“Oh, I have no clue,” you said, genuinely thinking about it, “I don’t think I’ve put much time into thinking about it, honestly. Maybe the Southern Cross? It’s pretty easy to spot.”
Jungwon hummed next to you. Then he grabbed your hand and made you make a pointer finger, guiding it to where he wanted you to point, “Mine is Bootes. Can you see it? It’s right…” he moved your hand slightly, “…there.”
“Yeah… yeah, I think so.” You replied, squinting.
“Do you see the big star at the bottom? Its name is Arcturus.” He let go of your hand.
“I didn’t know you knew so much about astronomy,” you laughed, “it’s endearing.”
Jungwon chuckled, “My maternal grandpa worked for NASA. As crazy as it sounds, I was born from generational wealth.”
You smacked him teasingly, “You don’t say!”
“Yeah, yeah, I know,” he said, “crazy that the spoiled rich kid was born this way. And both his parents, too.”
You nodded, “Crazy. Would’ve never guessed. But, question, why do you like Bootes?”
“Oh, mainly because of Arcturus,” he replied, “because I can almost guarantee that there’s some sort of other life out there.”
“Yeah,” you agreed, “do you think they’re smarter than us?”
“Maybe.”
“Cooler?”
“Definitely not.”
“Do you think there’s a parallel version of you and I that are doing the exact same thing right now?”
Jungwon paused, “I hope.”
You smiled, “Who do you think wins in a fight, you or alien you?”
“Oh,” he laughed, “I’d definitely win. No question about it.”
“How can you be so sure? What if their species is naturally taller and stronger?”
“I’m smarter.”
“Sure…” you said, “so does that mean alien me would beat human you? Or would you finally one-up me for once?”
Jungwon laughed loudly at your comment, “Wow… you think you’re so funny.”
You peeked at him and smiled to yourself before looking back at the stars and sighing, “I think I’m starting to like Bootes, too.”
Once back in Jungwon’s car, the silence was more comfortable than previous times. This time, it’s as if you’ve let your heart completely out of its cage of fear without actually telling Jungwon how you feel. This time, you’re sure that somewhere along the lines, you started to fall for him. This time, you knew that he meant something to you.
Halfway through the drive, Jungwon started to talk about his intergalactic arch-nemesis again and how he was sure that alien Jungwon was not as cool as human Jungwon.
“You two are essentially the exact same, though, just from different planets.” You said as a counter argument.
“Let me ask you this,” Jungwon replied, “Do you think you’re better than your alien self?”
You thought for a second before answering, “No. I am her and she is me. I’m sure she’s great.”
Jungwon laughed at your reply, “Okay, that was a pretty nice response.”
“Thank you,” you said, “I like to think highly of my alien self, because if she’s anything like me, she probably doesn’t think the highest of herself.”
Jungwon’s face got a bit more serious as he pulled onto your street, “What do you mean?” He turned down the radio.
“Oh, I, uh,” you stumbled over your words, “I didn’t mean to turn this into a pity party or anything, just…”
He parked the car and only looked at you.
“I’m sorry,” you laughed awkwardly, “that got depressing quick.”
“No worries,” he reassured, grabbing your hand and surprising you, “why don’t you think the highest of yourself?”
“Jungwon,” you said, uncomfortable, “you’re not my therapist. No need to worry about me-”
“No,” he cut you off, “I want to know. I mean, if anything, you’re miles smarter than me.”
You laughed a bit, “Um, thanks. But intelligence isn’t everything.”
He nodded, “Go on.”
“It’s just,” you started, “nothing really. It just sucks being the absolute poorest person at your school. No matter how high I score, or how hard I work, no one sees that. They just see my class background.”
Jungwon studied your face, “I’m sorry.”
“Wha-” you sputtered, “Why are you apologizing? It’s not like you were the one who did it! Well…” you paused, “actually you did. But that was a while ago. I basically already forgot.”
Jungwon doesn’t break his stare, “I wish I could help.”
You felt your heart race faster in your chest as you locked eyes with him, “Really… it’s okay. I swear.”
Something about the way that he was looking at you had you frozen. Sure, Jungwon had made questionable comments in the past, but nothing as simple as this specific look. You weren’t sure what it was.
Your eyes flickered down to his hand, still holding yours. You felt your heart rate pick up as you realized the proximity you were in.
As if nothing happened, Jungwon slowly tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear and looked at you like you were the only person on earth.
You felt your mind start to go fuzzy as you thought about him.
In that moment, it felt like you two were the only people alive to feel anything. It felt like all the world’s people’s emotions had swirled around the two of you, catching you in a deadly storm, of which neither of you wanted to escape.
In that moment, you felt everything and nothing all at once.
In that moment, it was just Jungwon.
And in that moment, you took the risk to lean into him softly place your lips on his.
The months of secret yearning spilled into the car and into the kiss. Before you could even realize what happened, you pulled away.
You were terrified. You swallowed deeply and looked at Jungwon, who seemed equally as shocked. You then mumbled a quiet “goodbye” as you left his car and ran into your family’s apartment complex.
You didn’t look back to watch him drive away silently.
xvii. NEITHER OF US PLANNED IT
You knew you were screwed. You knew you were plainly, simply, just screwed.
There was no one you could talk about last night with. Wonyoung already thought you had been dating Jungwon for some time now, and Minji and Gyuvin knew you two weren’t actually together. If you told them what happened, you were almost 100% sure you would never hear the end of it.
You obviously wouldn’t talk to Jungwon about it, either. Why the fuck would you talk about the elephant in the room to the elephant in the room?
You’d been freaking out all morning and nothing was easing your mind. One way or another, you’d have to face Jungwon today. You were nearly sick to your stomach thinking about it.
You were already at Wonyoung’s, but you were silently freaking out in her guest bathroom while she was getting ready. You almost threw up while you thought about the night to unfold. Your hands were sweaty, stomach sick, and head hurting. You weren’t sure how you’d survive the evening.
You took a deep breath and walked back into Wonyoung’s room, her already finishing her makeup and hair, still dressed in her pajamas, as putting the dress on was the last step.
She turned her head to you with a concerned expression as you trudged through the door, not even trying to hide your emotions at this point.
“What’s wrong, drama queen?” She asked, looking over her shoulder at you.
You sighed dramatically into her mattress after flopping yourself loudly onto it.
“Okay…” she laughed, “Well if you want to talk about it, I’m here.”
“I just hate emotions.” You grumbled.
She laughed again, “Okay, me too. Wanna tell me why?”
You groaned, “No.”
Roughly an hour and half later, you two were both ready to be picked up by your dates. Before the dance, there were pictures to be taken, and a dinner to be eaten, and then you could finally go to the dance, which started at 7:30.
Taesan and Wonyoung chattered in the front seat while you and Jungwon remained dead silent, not even looking at each other.
The car ride stayed exactly like that during the twenty minute drive.
Once you all arrived at the park to take pictures, you lifted yourself out of the car and walked to wherever Taesan and Wonyoung were leading.
At the pavilion, you took the time to fix some strands of your hair and flatten any creases in your dress, which was blue, Jungwon’s favorite color.
Even though you were originally standing alone, Jungwon soon made his way towards you. He cleared his throat awkwardly, “You, uh… you dress well for the occasion.” You could tell that he was flustered, but you’d be lying if you didn’t admit that you were too. You were just glad he didn’t bring up the incident from the night prior.
You laughed shyly, “I mean, of course. I was planning on getting my heart broken tonight after all.”
“I mean, we did agreed to keep this act going,” he replied, “We can’t have me breaking your heart while you look so pretty.”
Your heart started racing like you’d just ran a marathon. Trying to stay calm, all you could muster back was “thanks”.
Some pictures and a dinner later, you and your group arrived at the location where the dance would be held, which was none other than the downtown’s Music Hall.
As you walked in with Wonyoung, you tried to take in everything that you could, from architectural designs to the art on the ceilings to the over-the-top decorations that Ivy Hills had created for the event.
It didn’t take long for her to grab your hand and pull you along to talk with some of her friends, one of them including Park Minju, who you’d first met around a month ago.
You surprisingly relaxed a lot during the dance, having expected the DJ to only play classy songs, but you were entirely shocked when Fire Burning by Sean Kingston blasted through the speakers.
Around half an hour later, you found yourself on a balcony from the top floor of the venue, needing some fresh air after sweating as much as you did. You didn’t expect to dance as much as you did, but nonetheless you still needed a break.
It was a lot colder outside than you’d anticipated it to be, somehow forgetting that the sun had already set. You didn’t really mind, though, as you were too lost in thought to even pay any attention to the weather.
Almost exactly a minute later, you heard an all-too-familiar voice from behind you. He slowly approached to stand next to you and asked, “Are you okay?”
You nodded, too lost in thought to really acknowledge him, “Yeah.”
“What’s up?”
“Just…” you finally looked at him, “just a lot going on right now.”
He chuckled a bit, “I get it.”
A comfortable silence fell over the two of you as he tried to mimic your body language.
From inside the venue, your ears perked up at the sound of the DJ announcing the first slow song of the night, to which you groaned.
“What?” Jungwon questioned.
“Slow songs are just soooo corny. Especially at dances. It’s always either ‘Perfect’ by Ed Sheeran or ‘A Thousand Years’ by Christina Perri or ‘I Can’t Help Falling in Love With You’ by Elvis.”
Jungwon shook his head in disbelief, “So you don’t like slow dancing?”
“It’s not that I don’t like slow dancing,” you replied, “the songs are just overplayed and corny.”
“I mean…” he started, “I completely disagree. I think it’s romantic. But, okay.”
“Of course you wouldn’t get it,” you retaliated, “you’ve never been to a public school dance. PDA is off the charts. It’s gross.”
“I’m sure of it,” he replied, “but PDA is off the charts here, too. You just don’t see it because these weirdos go hide in the unisex bathrooms and-”
“Ew,” you cut him off, “ew, okay. Stop there please.”
Jungwon laughed loudly, “Listen, this is how I can tell you only know the surface of private schools.”
“Yeah, and maybe I’d like to keep it that way. We’re graduating this month anyway, and I’ll never have to see anyone here again if I don’t want to.”
“Sounds like a dream,” he said, “where are you going for school?”
“I haven’t committed anywhere yet, is that bad?” You winced.
“No,” he assured, “definitely not. My parents wanted me to go to Yale but I ended up on Brown. Took me months to choose between Brown and UCLA.”
“Oh my god,” you laughed, “I got rejected from UCLA. I’m stuck between MIT and Brown. Yale accepted me, but they didn’t offer me enough. There’s no way in Hell that I’m paying twenty thousand a semester.”
“Yale didn’t even waitlist me,” Jungwon sighed, “my parents were so mad. Their next choice was Princeton or Brown, so I chose Brown to make them happy.”
“My parents just wanted me to go to the state school,” you said, “…good ‘ol Virginia Tech.”
“Not a bad school,” he answered, “but I understand your parents’ concerns. Moving out of state is hard. You’re their only child, too.”
“Yeah,” you shrugged, “I understood why. But I don’t think they understand how important education is to me… I don’t know.”
Jungwon smiled, “Well, if you go to Brown, just know you’ll have a friend there.”
You smiled back at him.
Noticing the song was over, you muttered, “Thank god.”
Just then, through the speakers, you heard the opening violin notes to one of your favorite childhood songs that your dad used to play for you on his CD player: ‘Come On Eileen’ by Dexy’s Midnight Runners.
You gasp in excitement, “I’d much rather dance to something like this.”
Jungwon laughed at your reaction, “Well, then can I have this dance?”
You tried to fight your smile, “Why yes, you can.”
Jungwon stuck out his hand to you, but instead of you grabbing it to slow dance, you linked his arm with yours and started making him do a strange folk dance with you, making him spin and dip you, and trying to convince him to let you dip him, but with no success.
Just as the song started, it ended. The DJ announced over the speakers that the king and queen of the ball would soon be announced.
Without saying a word, you followed Jungwon into the building and down the steps, towards where the crowd was forming.
To no one’s surprise, the queen was announced to be Wonyoung, and her king to be Taesan.
As they did their dance, you leaned towards Jungwon and whisper-shouted sarcastically, “Who would’ve seen this coming?”
He laughed at your comment and replied, “Right?”
A moment passes before he leans over again and asks, “Do you wanna go get something to drink with me? I need some water.”
You nodded and followed him back up the steps to the second floor where there were still people, but much less crowded than the bottom floor.
As he was walking, he looked over his shoulder at you and said, “I can finally hear myself think now.”
Once he got his water, you both retreated back to the initial balcony that he found you on earlier in the night. The silence was comforting, and you caught yourself trapped in your thoughts again.
Out of nowhere, Jungwon suddenly broke the silence:
“Did that kiss mean anything to you yesterday?”
Completely caught off guard, you replied, “Huh?”
Without missing a beat, he explained, “Like, when I dropped you off yesterday. Did that mean anything to you? I’m just confused ‘cause- I mean, I know it wasn’t for show. It was only the two of us in the car. I- I just want to know.”
You took a second to even process what he said to you. Sure, it was inevitable that he was eventually going to bring it up. But you didn’t think now was the moment, especially so soon.
Trying to find the right words, you responded, “Oh, um… I don’t know if this is a conversation we should have here and now… I mean… there’s people around and…”
Jungwon nodded stiffly.
“I…” you trailed off, “I think I’m going to go back downstairs.”
And just like that, you left Jungwon alone again.
xviii. ROLLER-COASTER KINDA RUSH
For the next few hours of the dance, you didn’t see Jungwon at all. In fact, he didn’t even ride with you, Taesan, and Wonyoung to Wonyoung’s afterparty. You were starting to worry that by you deflecting the conversation earlier, he took it as a rejection.
The next time you saw Jungwon was an hour into Wonyoung’s afterparty. You caught the slightest glimpse of him in the kitchen, but just as you’d seen him, he’d disappeared from your sight. You were beginning to believe you had started hallucinating him from how much he was driving you crazy.
However, once outside, you’d seen Jungwon’s car parked on the street across from Wonyoung’s mansion, and sighed in relief when you realized you weren’t actually losing your mind.
Near the end of the afterparty, Jungwon snuck up on you.
“Hey.”
You jumped, startled from the sudden appearance, “Hey. I haven’t seen you all night.”
His only response was a simple and short “yeah”. Before you both fell into an uncomfortable silence.
A couple of seconds later, Jungwon asked you, “Do you want a ride home?” He held up his keys.
You smiled at the gesture, knowing that otherwise, you’d have to find someone else to drive you home, and although Taesan drove you there, and he’d likely be staying the night, leaving you to fend for yourself.
“Sure.”
With the party already dying down, you made sure to say goodbye to Wonyoung and thank her for hosting. You gave her a small hug and watched as Jungwon dapped up Taesan.
The both of you walked to Jungwon’s car in silence down the driveway.
However, this time, you decided to bite the bullet:
“I think we should talk about what happened yesterday.”
You noticed Jungwon almost freeze in his spot for a second but he continued walking to his car.
All he could mutter out was another “yeah”.
Once you reached his car, he quickly put it in gear and started driving you home.
Jungwon didn’t say anything until he almost reached your apartment. He parked his car on the street, and got out to walk you to your door.
He sighed, yet started, “Listen, I know you’re getting paid from this. But we never needed to kiss to seal the deal…” he trailed off, “so I really don’t understand why that was a necessary part to the whole act and-”
“That wasn’t about the money.” You cut him off.
Jungwon slowly turned to look at you, confused, “What?”
“It-” you stumbled over your words, “it stopped being about the money a while ago.”
A small and barely audible “oh” escaped his lips, with an unreadable face.
“I-” you started, “I- I know that we’re supposed to sell this,” you motioned between the two of you, “thing for a long longer. I know that because we both agreed on it. But…” you trailed off, not sure what to say next.
You took a deep breath, “But what I say next might change the trajectory of this… friendship…” you shook your head, “…or whatever this is.”
Jungwon said nothing.
“But the truth is, I-” you sighed, defeated, “I kissed you because I wanted to kiss you. Not because of the stupid money, and not because of the validation I’d get from Wonyoung and Taesan.”
He stood still, motionless, still with an indecipherable expression.
Nearly to tears with frustration and stress, you continued, “I kissed you because… because I felt like it was right in the moment. And- and it’s okay if you don’t feel that way. And if that is the case, then I’m sorry for kissing you and making things weird between us.”
Sighing one last time, “And I know the unspoken rule of this whole thing was to not have any actual feelings for each other, but-”
“Y/N.” Jungwon cut you off.
Afraid that you went overboard, you muttered sheepishly, “…what?”
“Please,” he said, taking a step closer, “please, stop talking.”
You frowned, “Did I say too much?”
“No,” he laughed, “but if you never stop rambling, I won’t be able to tell you how I feel.”
“Um,” you said quietly, “sorry, what?”
You weren’t sure exactly what Jungwon meant by ‘telling you how he felt’ but you were nearly bracing yourself for the worst. You decided to keep quiet as to not disturb him.
“I want you to know something right off the bat,” he started, “okay?”
You nodded but still didn’t say anything.
“It was never about Wonyoung and Taesan for me,” he laughed, “Hell, I’m the reason that we were all forced to hang out, the four of us.”
He sighed, “Y/N, I’ve always admired you, but I never knew how to deal with it. Why? Because in all of my life, I have never had a girl distract me from school as badly as you did.”
Your eyes widened at the confession.
“The only reason that I’m ranked 2nd in math for our class is because you are 1st,” he continued, “And I used to really hate you for it, because who did this pretty girl think she was, coming into my school and usurping me of my top rank in the class?!”
You felt yourself flush at the compliment, but tried to stay as calm as possible.
Jungwon calmed down, “But… at a point, I realized that you never did it to spite me, and you were genuinely just that smart. Then, I got over myself.”
You nodded with furrowed eyebrows.
“But,” he sighed, “I knew I had already pushed your buttons so hard to the point that I really thought there would be no point of return…”
“…So, when you brought up the idea of fake dating me, I immediately said no, because I knew it wouldn’t end well for me,” Jungwon laughed bittersweetly, “But then you challenged me. And I love a challenge.”
You felt your heart flutter at his words, now noticing how closely he was standing to you. You opened your mouth to try and form a response, but the only thing that you said came out in a whisper:
“Wow… I don’t know what to say.”
He smiled brightly at you, grabbing your hand.
“I don’t think words can be used in this moment.”
As if he’d been doing it forever, Jungwon wrapped one arm around your waist and let the other cup your head. Slithering your arms around his back, you stood on your tippy toes.
This time, you knew you wouldn’t run away from his kiss.
a/n : aaaand it’s over meow meow meow sorry for the long wait but it seemed like life hasn’t been on my side for the past year. hope u guys enjoyed tho <3 this was a bit too happy ending for me and not nearly enough angst but whateva
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