"From The Moment I Met You, Your Personality Had The Most Extraordinary Influence Over Me. I Quite Admit

I’m doing numbers on this platform

I have no secrets from my master. My loyalty is without question.

Trump Supporters: "Save our children!"

Trump Supporters: "She called a 5-year-old the N-word? Let's raise a million dollars for her!"

My friend who doesn't play dishonored sent me a post about it and I started explaining how funny the Abbey is cause the entire religion is "we're going to defeat God with math and music" and they went "sorry that God doesn't vibe with jazz"

Someone mod dishonored so the overseer music boxes play jazz

I prefer destroy ending, but she... She deserves to be happy

gonna try to post WIPs 👀

NOW THIS IS THE PART OF THE SONG WHERE I LIKE TO TALK TO MY AUDIENCE. I LIKE TO TELL THEM THERES SOMETHING I WANT FROM YOU HEP CATS TONIGHT. I WANT YOU TO LOOK TO YOUR LEFT, LOOK TO YOUR RIGHT, YOUR TWELVE O’CLOCK, THREE O’CLOCK, SIX O’CLOCK, NINE O’CLOCK, ROCK AROUND THE CLOCK TONIGHT AND I WANT YOU TO FIND THOSE POINTS OF NO RETURN, THOSE SINGULARITIES, THOSE BURNING RINGS OF FIRE IN THE BEAUTIFUL PUPILS OF THE BEAUTIFUL EYES OF THE BEAUTIFUL BOY, GIRL, NEITHER, BOTH OR IN-BETWEEN THAT YOU BROUGHT WITH YOU TONIGHT, AND I WANT YOU TO TELL THEM HOW YOU REALLY FEEL. I WANT YOU TO TELL THEM YOU LOVE THE WAY THEY SO SEAMLESSLY, LIKE-A-DREAMFULLY, SO BEAUTIFULLY, OH SO DUTIFULLY JAM THAT SQUARE PEG IN THE ROUND HOLE IN THEIR HEARTS! I WANT YOU TO TELL THEM YOU LOVE THE WAY THEY DONT STICK OUT LIKE SORE MIDDLE FINGERS! THAT THEY CRAWL THEIR WAY UP THE SIDE OF THE BELL CURVE, STICK THEIR FLAG AT THE PEAK, AND SLIDE THEIR WAY BACK DOWN! I WANT YOU TO TELL THEM YOU LOVE THE WAY THAT THEY’RE NOT MALADAPTIVE, NOT MALCONTENT, NOT MALIGNANT OR MALEFICENT, BUT RATHER THAT YOU LOVE THEM! EXACTLY THE WAY THAT EVERYBODY ELSE IS!!!!!!

I know I just rebloged a post with exactly this comment but...

FOREMAN GIVES CHASE A FUCKING KANGAROO STUFFED ANIMAL FOR HIS WEDDING I AM NOT OKAY

Someone has definitely done this before but I’d like to add to the collection

Sorry this is literally the funniest thing ever