Thinking About Eddie’s Dom Voice Being The Same As His Dramatic DM Voice And Steve Only Finding Out

thinking about how Johnny and Alex met at a shitty night job and decided a few years later to write an audio drama that literally changed the lives of thousands of people. how Harlan was literally unemployed when he decided to start making malevolent, and now he's singlehandedly revolutionizing the audio drama landscape. or Zach Valenti and Gabriel Urbina being long-time college friends who wanted to make something fun with no expectation that over 20 million people would listen to it....not being hyperbolic at all when I say that some of the best pieces of audio fiction have been made in basements by teams of less than 3 people. wtnv has always been a few friends who wanted to make something interesting after their day job. i am just thinking of artists persevering under the crushing weight of capitalism. .. and great art made out of pure love and curiosity for an emerging medium...

oh my fucking god THANK YOU! these are literally my exact thoughts?! do you have any idea how hard it is to find fanfic that doesn't bash ron but is anti hermione? i don't hat her either and can sometimes enjoy her character but i get tired of the same thing over and over where ron is an evil bastard and hermione is everything good and pure in the world.

percy is the best hp character full stop.

I have several posts about my issues with the twins but it mostly boils down to them almost killing a classmate for a stupid reason and send him into catatonia.

love this post!

What harry potter characters do you love but have no problem with people bashing? and what characters can you not stand being bashed?

Hello anon!

Aight, let’s get to work:

HP characters I love but have no problem with people bashing them:

Harry Potter himself:

He can be painfully stupid a lot of the times, but gets bursts of intelligence every once in a while cause of plot reasons, can be quite insensitive, and can be pretty arrogant.

Hermione Granger:

She acts morally superior just because she reads more than others, she’s judgemental, close-minded, bitchy, and can do some EXTREMELY fucked up things. I think of her as completely grey when her character gets looked at objectively, because—unfortunately due to Harry being Mr. POV and Hermione being Rowling’s self-insert—many horrifying things she’s done get glossed over.

Draco Malfoy:

I do love him (he’s my 2nd favourite HP character) but there’s no denying that he was a blood-prejudiced bully who deserved a punch in the face, and I 100% understand why people dislike/hate him. I only like anti Draco content when it’s from Snape fans, other fans can be too much sometimes.

Ginny Weasley:

She was an absolute bitch in HBP! The way she treated Ron and Fleur made me wanna throat-punch her. Throughout HBP, she was horrible to him about both his insecurities with Quidditch and his insecurities with relationship experience—even when Ron was being overprotective when he saw her making out with Dean, he definitely did not deserve that.

Remus Lupin:

Remus and I… we have an odd relationship. I love Remus. I do… I really really do… but the things he does sometimes make me want to go “NYAHHHHHHHHHHHH” every time I reread the series. Most of his fans overlook his flaws, which is incredibly disappointing because I find his complexity and flaws extremely fascinating… that’s literally why I loved him in the first place. Even when criticising him, his fans still tend to gloss over the negative aspect(s) of his character. Unfortunately, I’m on the anti side when it comes to him, I only interact with his fans if they’re Remadora (and a lot of the times Prongsfoot) shippers.

I’m not gonna bash him or explain anymore cause it’s actually his birthday today and I only just remembered it a few minutes ago. I was actually planning on making an anti post about him today but then I remembered it was his birthday today and I just can’t do it. I love him too much to do that.😭😭 So yeah, you guys are gonna have to wait a few more days until I make an anti post about Remus, sorry not sorry.

Fred and George:

They were cruel bullies a lot of the times. Their flaws get overlooked by a majority of this fandom and they’re seen as harmless pranksters, which is rather irritating. They tried to lock Percy in cursed pyramid, which I’m pretty sure can count as attempted murder, and they gave Ron arachnophobia. The twins show a blatant disregard for people’s safety and well-being a lot of the times.

I’m gonna stop here and just say that: I’m alright with almost all HP characters being criticised and sometimes bashed. Every single HP character is problematic—besides Luna and Neville. There’s nothing wrong with pointing out their flaws. Over exaggerating their flaws? Yes, that’s wrong. But merely pointing them out? Nope.

HP characters I absolutely cannot STAND being bashed:

Ron Weasley:

Most of the things he did that he gets bashed for are completely normal for a teenager. I mean… making an ass of yourself during a party, getting mad at your friend(s) over silly things, dating someone you aren’t really interested in because you like the attention, getting jealous, saying mindless things without thinking it through etc etc. Those are teenage mistakes. That’s common teenage boy idiocy. This fandom excuses Draco and the Marauders’ heinous acts by claiming that “they were just teenagers🥺” but when Ron does things that are 100% normal and are done many times in real life, he gets demonised for it. Make it make sense people!

Percy Weasley:

How. Fucking. DARE. YOU. What did he even do?? His family (besides Molly) was horrible to him! He never bothered anyone and no one in his family gave a shit about him except when Gred and Feorge (not a mistake) treated him like crap. He deeply cared about Ginny and Ron, and Arthur didn’t even try to make things better despite them literally working at the same place. Let’s not forget that no one besides Molly bothered contacting him for years… and when there was a war going on. Upsetting Molly is literally the ONLY bad thing he ever did, other than that he never did nothing wrong.

Tom Riddle Sr:

He. Literally. Did. Nothing. Wrong. You guys are demonising him… because he “abandoned” his RAPIST? His R-A-P-I-S-T? Is this fandom fucking ill? He had every right to leave his son and Merope, he was raped… repeatedly… for months. The victim can never be blamed for not wanting to face the reminder of their trauma for the rest of their lives. He was kind to Cecelia and comforted her when she was shocked by Morfin’s dead snake. And the only people he was ever rude to were the Gaunts and they were pretty much insane. One called him “filthy” and one hexed him.

Have a nice day, anon!

Miscellaneous Clark Kent headcanons as relate to my little fic universe, that may or may not ever come up because who knows:

Little Clark was really susceptible to childhood superstitions for some reason. He didn’t go under ladders, he did the salt over the shoulder thing, he did not fuck with that Bloody Mary shit like NOPE I’M OUT THIS SLUMBER PARTY IS CANCELED, LANA GET OUT OF MY HOUSE AND TAKE YOUR MURDER GHOSTS WITH YOU. He believes that he is over this as an adult but whenever his foot is about to fall on a crack in the sidewalk it actually stops like a half inch above the ground and hovers there. He does not notice he is doing this. No one notices, ever, because it is the weirdest subtle unconscious thing in the world. At least Martha’s back is safe?

I covered the picky eater thing in Christmas in Kansas but to be more specific his tastebuds are just really sensitive to certain chemical compounds? Not just in terms of things he won’t eat but also in terms of things that he expects to be there and he doesn’t really like foods that lack those things. Your two options to make him eat anything are to cover it in sugar, or cover it in garlic.

He goes through a lot of breathmints. Can you imagine if Superman saved someone and they were like “man i appreciate being alive but he had some really bad garlic breath”? He would be so horrified.

He has a ratty, fucked-up old shirt that he wears whenever he is making pasta with red sauce. Even Superman cannot stand against the ability of red sauce to end up on whatever you happen to be wearing. HE WAS SO CAREFUL THIS TIME, HOW DID A STAIN END UP ON HIS BACK THAT JUST MAKES NO SENSE. Clark Kent’s weaknesses: kryptonite, tomato stains.

His ability to perfectly imitate anyone’s voice was one of the first things to manifest themselves, but this wasn’t the kind of thing anyone noticed was weird. It definitely didn’t seem like a power. He was just a small child who could do a really good Kermit the Frog. He sang Rainbow Connection at a middle school talent show and all the moms cried.

He definitely has a playlist to cheer himself up and get pumped and it has Eye of the Tiger and You’re the Best on it. Probably also half the Top Gun soundtrack.

Clark Kent’s twitter is pretty standard snarky newsman except with more farming memes. No one can tell how ironic the farming memes are. They might not be ironic at all. Clark Kent might be really sincere, or he might just be so ironic that he has circled back around into sincerity. No one knows. He’s also really good at that thing where you retweet two things from a person that side-by-side reveal they are a dingus. I don’t know if there’s a word for that.

His Snapchat is all dogspotting, with occasional rare dance breaks. He’s a pretty good dancer since he found those YouTube tutorials. He does this thing with his hips that Lois finds deeply upsetting for reasons she cannot articulate.

Jimmy asked Clark how he got so fit once and Clark was like “uh, farming. farm. eyup.” But he kept pressing for deets and Clark ended up just telling him that he’d pulled a Milo of Croton??? He lifted a newborn calf over his head and then just did that every single day until he was lifting a cow over his head. Jimmy knows nothing about farming or cows or physical fitness and this seemed plausible enough to him.

He has a blog where he posts rejected articles and it is the wonkiest thing in the entire world because that is why they got rejected. Perry takes one look at these articles and is like “it will take more words than I want to pay you for just to explain the setup for this article and also there are five people total who care, in the world, including you”

He has to be really careful when he buys clothes because he needs to make sure that they aren’t too tight and he has full range of motion. He does not want to relive The Skinny Jeans Incident. Shirts that say ‘I flexed and the sleeves fell off’ are only funny until it happens to you, then they are just horrible reminders. Popped seams everywhere. There is no way to explain that without looking like a huge tool.

Even when Superman has a really shitty day he keeps it together until he gets home, but then he shuts the balcony door and peels off his costume and Clark does the Tina Belcher groan for like ten minutes while he takes a shower because he got covered in sewer mutant or space crab or god knows and UUUUUUUUUUGH. Fortunately the nice older lady in the apartment next door always seems to know when he has had a shitty day and she brings him pie.

She can hear his melodramatic bullshit from over at her place, that’s how she knows. They share a bathroom wall and it practically echoes. If she times it right he will answer the door before he has put a shirt on because he doesn’t want to leave her waiting in the hall. She does not know what his day job is and it definitely does not occur to her that he is Superman because her primary interaction with him is that he acts like a whiny bitch and she brings him pie so she can ogle him. She is a simple woman who enjoys life’s simple pleasures.

The Kryptonian language is really complicated in terms of tonality, context, word order, musicality, etc, and the written language reflects that. Things like the order things are in, how things overlap, colors, etc, are all important. So basically I really like the idea of his symbol being one that represents his family name and says that he is of the House of El. It’s really just basically his last name.

If Starfleet gets to have replicators then Krypton gets to have replicators and Jor-El definitely stuck one in the ship so his son would have, you know, food and clothing. But only Kryptonians can use their tech because they’re who the neural interface is designed for so whoops they got real lucky that Kryptonian babies love milk from Earth goats. Clark only started using the replicator later but it only knows how to make Kryptonian things and only some of those are useful to him.

Okay so here is where I tie those last two bullet points into something fucking dumb that you will take out of my cold dead hands: Clark got the costume out of the replicator. It didn’t necessarily understand what he wanted though? Like, the concept of a costume didn’t really translate, but it got the idea that he wanted an active uniform, so that is what it made. It’s brightly colored and has his last name on the front. Clark is wearing a Kryptonian football jersey is what I’m getting at. Later Kara will be VERY confused by this. Imagine ending up on an alien planet and meeting your cousin and he’s been fighting crime dressed like a quarterback.

Most telepathy does not work because different neural patterns. Diana can only manage it if she uses her lariat and even then it’s like trying to lasso a freight train that does not stop. It’s extremely disorienting. J'onn has just accepted that Superman can hear him but he’s not going to get anything back. It’s like the psychic equivalent of a dial tone for him. He’s trying to call his bro but their family has dialup. He tries not to fuck with it because he doesn’t want to poke around in Superman’s head blind and break something.

Clark can’t type with super speed because he’ll break the keyboard and the computer can’t keep up. Instead he uses shorthand along with a custom set of AutoHotKey macros and it is honestly infuriating how fast he can get things written with this setup. But also if he doesn’t have AutoHotKey on whatever he’s typing with then sometimes Lois will get an email like: ll] dyk f pw mde a dec wrt t $l stry? ]ck

A woman was told by her therapist to try talking to at least one person once a week but she decided to cheat by just talking to her empty apartment under the guise of telling Superman about her day because lol he can hear everything allegedly so this definitely counts and is what the doctor was going for with this. When she has to go to the hospital for a medical emergency she comes home and there is a note on her counter wherein Superman explains that he was worried because he hadn’t heard from her in a while, so he swung by to check on her. When he found out what happened he watered her plants and fed her goldfish and also that cat that he thought might be hers (she does not have a cat). She is completely mortified because she was just being full of shit she did not actually believe he could hear her oh god what all did she even say and whose cat is this???

Look if you are in Metropolis and you loudly say HEY SUPERMAN there is a very good chance he will hear it even if he doesn’t mean to. He is not trying to eavesdrop, that’s just what happens when you yell someone’s name in earshot.

He doesn’t wear the costume under his clothes because you may have noticed a running theme here where the universe is conspiring to ruin his clothes and leave him running around shirtless all the time. I mean thank god for the rest of us but he would rather not risk someone spilling their drink all over him somehow and suddenly his shirt is transparent and you can see the big S. It’s bad enough when it happens under ordinary circumstances. How often can one man get drinks spilled all over him? You would be shocked. Shocked. His eyes are up here, Lois.

is THIS your man? [shows an image of a malnourished injured exhausted man with big sad eyes looking up at the camera with blood smeared all over his face and mouth. and he is visibly trembling]

ok satellites are all alone up there just searching for everything and anything and it’s so beautiful and I hope they aren’t lonely

FIXED AT 221B BAKER STREET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bitches will find a fictional man attractive and then immediately imagine him in situations where he is losing alarming amounts of blood

i didnt realise ao3 was started in response to lj deleting account relating to p//edophi|ia and they explicitly support the posting of such works yikes

Permanent Damage

If you look long enough into the void, the void begins to look back through you.

Draco Malfoy will never be able to hold anything for long. Constant crucios over 3 years has damaged his nerves.Voldemort was most displeased with his inability to finish his task, the Carrow’s annoyed with his refusal to torture students for their detentions. His hands shake and shiver, nerves constantly shaking with invisible, imaginary pain that stopped years ago. He yells in frustration as his shaking body repeatedly clinks his teacup loudly against its saucer, another futile attempt to keep his hands steady, and smashes it against the floor, a thousand white shards glittering against the black tile.

Harry Potter breaks down every time he gets a headache. Hand clapping to his forehead as the pain sets on, muttering to himself that ‘hes not back.’ ‘I killed him.’ ‘Its over’ as he scans the room; flinching at too pale skin, hand twitching towards his wand as brown eyes reflect red in the flickering, fluorescent light. The cold tile beneath his fingers grounds him as he tries to convince himself that he’s okay. The feeling that some part of him died that day in the forest, surrendering before Voldemort’s wand never leaves, the hollow feeling leaving an aching, painful hole in its wake.

Ron Weasley finds himself scanning rooms over and over again. Planning exit strategies and ways to take out everyone in the room in order to escape. He imagines everyone as an enemy in disguise, subconsciously moving people like chess pieces and picking his small flat, not because it was cheap or because the neighborhood was good (its dismal really) but because it had the best strategic advantage in regards to the city and places around him, in order to hide in case of attacks. He once again comes to his senses after a nightmare and sighs as he realizes that in his delirium he once again had filled pages upon pages of his notebook with battle tactics and the floor plans of places hes been and fought (Hogwarts, the Ministry, the Burrow...). He rips them out and adds them to a growing folder before making a cup of tea.

Hermione Granger finds herself hording food, slipping apples into pockets and bread into her purse. She comes home to find herself with pockets of tarts and a bag of crackers, handfuls of berries slipped between pages of paperwork and cereal bars snuck into file folders. The months of hiding and foraging have made her paranoid and hyper aware of how much food she’ll need to get through the day. She’ll find herself counting calories and balancing proteins, carbs and fats before she can stop herself and measuring how much she eats, intuitively leaving some over for Harry and Ron, forgetting that they are no longer on the run, having to ration food.

Luna is no longer as carefree and dreamy as she was. Her creatures turn from whimsical and delicate to horrifying. Claws and teeth grow to protect and attack. She won’t leave the house for days, wandering around inside with closed eyes to avoid Blibbering Humdingers who now have poisonous spines and Nargles with razor teeth, her mind having twisted them from cures for loneliness to share with her father, to weapons of destruction to protect her from the outside world. They are real enough to her that she convinces herself they’ve locked her inside her house and won’t let her leave, she thinks they’ve kidnapped and hurt her friends because ‘It’s  to protect you’ ‘They are spies’ ‘It’s not real Luna’ ‘They only want to hurt you’. The whispers follow everywhere and consume her, dragging her into the void. It’s when she locks Hermione in her basement under the influence of her broken mind, twisted by false images and under the guise of Hermione being someone else using polyjuice, that she gets a room in the Janus Thickney ward of St Mungos. She has moments of clarity but they are few and far between. her mind crumbled, her spirit broken, a twisted shadow of the young, bright girl who hummed happily as she waltzed barefoot through the halls.

Dennis Creevey perpetually has a broken, cracked, dirty camera on a shelf in his bedroom, never to be touched.

George Weasley has smashed every mirror in his flat and refuses to repair them

Percy Weasley takes to straight vodka and tequila out of the bottle because his guilt over Fred.

Kreacher forever wears a cracked and blood stained locket till the day he dies.

Teddy Lupin spends hours staring at pictures of his parents, shifting into one or the other or trying for the perfect mixture of both, never getting it quite right.

Minerva McGonnagal finds a dusty box under Severus Snape’s bed filled with cracked records; a flaky leather jacket; old Polaroids of a girl with a head of flames and eyes of shattered emerald, smiling, arms wrapped tight around a boy with inky hair and sharp, onyx eyes; a fractured glass figurine of a lily lying carefully on top of the pile; folded within an old letter. She sobs over a life spent hating and being hated as she pats the scratched lacquer on a string-less bass guitar

There will always be an empty seat at many tables all over the country as people mourn lives lost unfairly.

You can take people out of the war, but can you take the war out of people?