This explains so much... :(
This is another one that’s just stacking up on information we’ve suspected for a while. When a child is praised for being smart or talented, it makes the stakes that much higher because they need to stay smart or talented in order to maintain their identity. Here’s the crux of this study:
“Adults may feel that praising children for their inherent qualities helps combat low self-esteem, but it might convey to children that they are valued as a person only when they succeed,” Brummelman said. “When children subsequently fail, they may infer they are unworthy.”
I have no words except... yes. Just, so much yes.
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Have I told y’all about my husband’s Fork Theory? If I did already, pretend I didn’t, I’m an old.
So the Spoon Theory is a fundamental metaphor used often in the chronic pain/chronic illness communities to explain to non-spoonies why life is harder for them. It’s super useful and we use that all the time. But it has a corollary. You know the phrase, “Stick a fork in me, I’m done,” right? Well, Fork Theory is that one has a Fork Limit, that is, you can probably cope okay with one fork stuck in you, maybe two or three, but at some point you will lose your shit if one more fork happens. A fork could range from being hungry or having to pee to getting a new bill or a new diagnosis of illness. There are lots of different sizes of forks, and volume vs. quantity means that the fork limit is not absolute. I might be able to deal with 20 tiny little escargot fork annoyances, such as a hangnail or slightly suboptimal pants, but not even one “you poked my trigger on purpose because you think it’s fun to see me melt down” pitchfork.
This is super relevant for neurodivergent folk. Like, you might be able to deal with your feet being cold or a tag, but not both. Hubby describes the situation as “It may seem weird that I just get up and leave the conversation to go to the bathroom, but you just dumped a new financial burden on me and I already had to pee, and going to the bathroom is the fork I can get rid of the fastest.”
The big city walmart got Shadow Highs recently, and in a moment of weakness, I got Ash. I always liked the Rainbow High line well enough, but apparently I can't resist big dolls or fantasy colors, lol.
His packaging was much less complicated than the other Rainbow High doll I purchased (for a modding project) in that I was able to access all his clothes without tearing any of the packaging apart.
I didn't care for his airpods or the sneakers he wore in-box, but otherwise I love his outfits. I wonder if he's supposed to be Japanese or just an otaku? Maybe both?
I plan on going through and cleaning up the loose threads and hairs. Maybe someday I'll wash the glue out of his hair, trim the back to his crown, and style it more like the box art.
I suspect it's the case with all the Shadow High dolls, but he was a pain to photograph.