DARK NATURALISM

imagine finding a fossil that at first seems like an ancient human, but once you actually take samples of it, you find out it's a 17 million year old fossil, and it's a perfect dna match to you.

I don't know if this is a thing but...

I can't stop thinking about Dark Cottagecore...

Consider:

Milk swirling into your tea reflects the stormclouds in the darkened sky as rain pelts at your window. It is trying to get in.

You sleep wrapped up in the quilt your grandmother made you. The pictures she sewed into it show scenes from the stories she whispered in your ear as a child. Sometimes, you swear the monsters on it move.

The warm, freshly baked bread is made to show hospitality to any visitors. The kindness you show them binds them into their visiting form and stops them from stealing you away at night.

Beautiful picture books you had as a child, all lined up on your bookshelf. At least three of them intone the dark rituals you know like the back of your hand.

You braid her hair, weaving wards into the plaits so you know she'll remain safe even after she crosses the threshold out of your home.

Your cat is soft as he purrs and leans into you. He is satisfied that he stopped the Things disguised as rats from getting into your home.

Repeat after me: - Veganism is not affordable - Veganism is not cruelty free - Veganism is not the best choice for everyone

your unreliable narrator fucking bit me

Correcting a Chinese kid's English homework that another American got wrong on a Chinese app named after Mao Zedong's Little Red Book as part of a mass online temper tantrum to help save TikTok was not on my 2025 bingo card, but here we are.

This might actually be the political fuck-up of the century. Our politicians are all 900 year old crypt keepers who probably turn off their computers by unplugging them from the wall. Were there a single synapse in their decrepit domes focused on something besides their next payday, they might have thought twice about challenging Millennials and Zoomers on the internet. I repeat, ON THE INTERNET. Oh to have the confidence of an octogenarian born into generational wealth.

Something I need people to understand is the "security threat" doesn't just stop at data. The mere act of normal Chinese and American citizens interacting scares the shit out of governments on both sides. I'm already seeing videos from folks here in the US talking about how shocked they were at the grocery hauls in China, and how much they could get with very little. Chinese people are watching Americans absolutely dog walk their own government and talk it for filth. People are having fun.

All rich people had to do was remember the deal. Americans are terrible people. If they had just paid folks enough to buy a house, an electric car, and a vacation once a year they'd sit in front of the TV in a docile fugue state while the wealthy shoved their boots up the ass of the global south. Now who knows what's going to happen. I just know it's a testament to how done with Mark Zuckerberg's ass people are that they're rather learn Mandarin than go back to Facebook.

I think 2025 is about to be a ride.