Reblog, Click The Picture, And Prepare For Battle.

white shrek

Ok, so I was reading this news story:

So far so normal, right? But then:

Like what. And then:

Like, I think Alaska State Trooper Ken Marsh wants to be a romance novelist. 

Tumblr used to be so easy, so simple.

oh uh. scuse me. just a lil snail crossing your dash

My girlfriend is turning 32 soon… 

I’ve told her not to get her hopes up. “After all,” I say, “we’re only going to celebrate it for half a minute” when she asked what in the world I was talking about, I pointed out “This is your thirty-second birthday”

As a writer I need everyone to know that whenever I write "exchanged glances" my intent is this

Happy winter solstice! The light begins to return tomorrow!!

When I was 17 my appendix ruptured because I thought I was just having period cramps and didn’t go to the hospital so don’t tell me PMS symptoms are no big deal

The old school lack of transparency on tumblr is amazing because you assume the people you follow must all be equivalent to you and then you see someone write “I brought my youngest to college today” and someone else write “my mom wouldn’t let me listen to Ariana Grande when I was a kid” and then your head explodes

Happy Internacional Asexuality Day y’all!!

I shall celebrate it with something completely unexpected: cake ✨