There was a man who always did cheat
In this he had everyone beat.
He cheated at poker,
And was always a joker;
The man who had mastered deceit.
the beauty of in-laws <3333
aaand bonus silly fili and kili
König and Domestic Silk Moth Hybrid!Reader
Due to popular demand (about 4 people)
Context: in this one, I’m having König stay human and having hybrids in a pet role. As an insect hybrid, I’m making her small AF (like 2-3 ft tall). I did consider making her Barbie sized tho 👀. So this is gonna have size kink bordering on micro/macro just so you know!
König it stuck on medical leave, and pretty damned miserable. He sustained a break that’s put him out of commission for a while. He’s never spent so long in his empty home, and it’s driving him insane. He’s spent basically his entire adult life married to his work, so he’s woefully unprepared to keep himself entertained.
And despite being something of a loner most times, he misses the noise. He misses the bodies and conversation. He and Horangi have a phone call every so often, and text as frequently as the work allows, but that only takes up so much time in the day.
And it’s Horangi that suggests a hybrid.
That’s something that he could throw himself into to keep occupied, as well as giving company. And unlike a pet, a hybrid would be able to be mostly self sufficient whenever he returned to work.
(Horangi doesn’t want to say if he returns. But König is not a young man, and has sustained a serious injury. There’s a chance that even if he heals, he won’t be the same as before. Combined with his rank, it won’t be huge surprise if he’s pressured or forced into retirement if his utility is limited.)
König is apprehensive— so he doesn’t want something quite as needy as a cat or dog hybrid, where he’d have to deal with heats and noise. And Horangi happens to have an old friend, retired, who raises domestic silk moth hybrids with his newfound free time. You’re picked to be offered up, freshly cut from your thick silk cocoon.
And for König, it’s love at first sight.
You’re very pretty. Fluffy white fur, big, dark, eyes. And so small. You barely come up to his hip, and raise your arms, asking to be lifted. It’s only then that he learns domesticated silk moths are flightless, their wings are pretty but unable to fly. It makes him feel a little bit of kinship with you. Restricted movement, denied purpose.
And basically his life revolves around you from that point. König doesn’t have many involved or expensive hobbies, so he has a lot of time and resources to devote to your care. You’re something of a niche pet, so it’s a little difficult to find things made for you. He resorts to commissions. Don’t fucking look at his Etsy purchase history.
You live your life perched on his shoulders or in his arms (you’re much too small to keep up with him). He’s a little afraid of letting you in his bed at night, he doesn’t want to roll over and crush you by accident, but you keep crawling under his covers anyways. You can’t help having cocooning behavior.
He’s constantly sitting you on ledges. On the sink while he shaves, on the counter when he cooks, on his desk when he works. You’ve always gotta be within arms reach for petting purposes.
And the petting, the kissing… he’s so addicted to the contact. He’s been alone for so long, and you’re so soft.
And that just leads to him getting more and more curious about your body. You don’t mind— you love him! And he loves his little Seidenmotte.
He’s beyond delicate with you. You’re so small— he has to work you up quite a bit before he can even fit a finger into your cute little pussy.
God it makes him hard how he can pin you down by the stomach with just one hand. And you make these little pips and squeaks when he fingers you— it’s just too cute for words. He totally shares some pictures with Horangi as thanks. (Which might lead to a couple of other colorful character asking to see pictures of you).
Usually he fucks your soft, fuzzy thighs to get off. He’s so warm and heavy against your clit, his cockhead practically reaching your chest. He paints your tits with white, pearly ribbons that glisten against the fuzz of your chest.
If you’re on top, he likes watching your useless wings beat while you slide your wet little cunt over him, the ridge of his head making you shiver when it bumps against your clit. You usually end up making yourself cum once or twice, and when you’re too tired and sensitive to move yourself he’ll grab your waist and grind you against him, using you like a toy to get himself off.
You don’t spread your wings often, but when you do, it leaves a little bit of moth dust behind from the tiny scales you shed. König thinks it’s so cute to see it against his bedsheets— it’s like glittery fresh snow, proof of how excited he made you.
an unexpected journey:
- bilbo was a simp for thorin the second he knocked on his door
- bilbo hearing gandalf and elrond talk about thorin in rivendell and thorin letting him hear
- thorin fully risking his life to save bilbo even tho he thinks he’s a “burden”
- bilbo being so personally hurt by thorin saying what he said, that he decides to leave (dramatic gay™️)
- thorin realizing he actually hurt bilbo and regretting having said anything (guilty gay™️)
- “why did you come back”
- bilbo saying he came back bc he wants to help thorin find a home
- bilbo being the one to intervene in thorin’s fight w azog despite never fighting before and having every excuse to stay on the tree
- he fully jumps an orc???? like twice the size of him???? to save his boyfriend????
- faces AZOG head on bc thorin wasn’t moving
- thorins first question upon waking being about whether bilbo is okay
- trying so hard to be angry at bilbo
- bilbo becoming a burden on thorins HEART rather than his mind
- “i have never been so wrong in all my life. i am sorry i doubted you.”
- the look™️ after the hug
the desolation of smaug:
- thorin and bilbo having the most willpower out of everyone in the group
- constantly joining at each other’s sides
- the look on thorins face when he realizes bilbo isn’t with them anymore
- thorin being the only one to think that bilbo would come for them
- thorin RUNNING to the cell door when bilbo appears
- bilbo looking to thorin when he asks them to trust him
- thorin being the only one who trusts bilbos judgement w the barrels
- “well done, master baggins”
- bilbo vouching for thorins character
- thorin giving him the Look™️ as bilbo speaks on his behalf
- “you have keen eyes, master baggins”
- “thorin, you can’t give up now.”
- thorin coming back as soon as bilbo calls for them
- thorin trying to dehumanize bilbo as much as possible so he “won’t care” as much about his life, being fully incapable of doing so
- bilbos FACE when thorin turns his sword on him
- thorin being able to really easily read bilbo’s expressions, even when he’s blind by greed
- thorin suggesting they all split up and taking bilbo with him
- bilbo not wanting to go with balin, and calling for thorin as he’s pulled away
- bilbo always immediately responding to thorins commands, not hesitating or doubting him for a second
- “keep going bilbo!”
battle of the five armies
- “i’ve tried talking to him, but he won’t listen.”
- the fact that bilbo took to stone because he knew what it would do to thorin, not caring if thorin found out and hated him after because he knew he was helping him
- the way thorin LOOKS at him when he shows him the acorn
- literally the Look™️
- the way bilbo relaxes under That Specific Gaze from thorin
- bilbo being the only one who cares enough to try and reason with thorin
- “you should never underestimate dwarves” ft. the Look™️
- thorin intentionally gives him one of the strongest pieces of armor they have
- “i look absurd,” “it is a gift, a token of our friendship. true friends are hard to come by.”
- never assuming for a SECOND that bilbo would be the one to betray him
- the SYMBOLISM of thorin backing away and them being separated by the other dwarves
- “i’m not afraid of thorin”
- thorins face when he realizes bilbo was the one to betray him
- bilbos voice being the only one thorin hears clearly in his head, the only voice that brings him to sense
- bilbos FACE as he says “thorin” when they finally come to fight
- thorins face when bilbo comes to warn him of the fifth army
- the Look™️
- they exchange one look and bilbo knows that he’s meant to go with thorin
- “i’m glad you’re here”
- “you’re going to live, thorin.”
- bilbo holding his hand
- “plant your tree, watch it grow”
- bilbo begging him to stay alive, whispering to him about the sky and the eagles, desperately saying his name as he dies
- cradling his body
- sobbing next to him
- standing alone at his body during the funeral, unmoving
- trying desperately not to cry, being unable to look at his body
- “i know that’s how you must honor him, but to me he was never that. he was... he was...”
- just nodding, balin knowing exactly what he wants to say but can’t bring himself to
- “who is this person you pledged your loyalty to? thorin oakenshield?”
- the Look™️
- “he... he was my friend.”
- bilbo baggins kept that map, thorins map, the for the rest of his life, for it was all he had left of a lost love
Okay genuine question, do people prefer reposts or commenting on their posts? Because ill see a post with like, a thousand notes and no comments ;-; please just tell me how best to show my love
The absolute whiplash
I love the whole concept that all the mortals by the late third age have this idea of elves as these serene, calm, wise and peaceful beings. Like at the council of Elrond and the like they all see the elves as inherently great givers of advice with the bigger picture at heart. Imagine if someone from then read a book on the first age. Like Faramir being exposed to Elrond’s records after he leaves for Valinor and thinking are these really the same species? Why are they setting everything on fire? Was the founder of Numenor really raised by these people? Did the calm lord Elrond really hold a knife to that guys throat? They are all completely feral and bloodthirsty and possess no basic judgement skills. Frodo getting to Valinor and being invited to a party at Finrod’s house. Expecting a deep cryptic discussion on lore and feeling out of place among all these dignified ethereal legends. And like ten minutes in people are playing drinking games with knives and fire. Frodo expects Lord Elrond to be shocked at his relatives behaviour but finds him in a knife throwing competition with the former high king. He seems to be winning. He also sees what seems to be two high kings making out in the stairwell. His last hope is Galadriel whose now in an intense bar fight with three of her cousins. Her husband is cheering her on from the corner.
The elves are not actually inherently wise. They just made all the mistakes and learnt from them after about the fifth attempt.
Incorrect Lord of the Rings Quotes
The Lord of the Rings + Tumblr Text Posts
Part 2
Sketches. I love to draw Price and Nikolai, something needs to be done about it..
Couples that were obviously gay but big time corp didn't let it be cannon:
I mean come on
" I learned that he had never married. I thought that odd, though I guessed why it was; No, I guessed that he wanted to remain "unattached" for some reason deep down which he did not understand himself - or would not acknowledge, for it alarmed him"
Thranduil: THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH MY SON, HE'S PERFECTLY FINE!
Legolas:
haha knives am i right? age: can join the military, cant legally drink
240 posts