Bilbo Baggins Has ADHD! It Says In The First Chapter Of The Hobbit That He Didn’t Remember Things Well

I thing sometimes cats don’t actually know what specifically they want – they’re just generally dissatisfied, so they stand there yelling “I YEARN” on the off chance that you’ll be able to do something about it.

ATLA writers, let’s talk about steel ships and what can go wrong with them

So, I live on a steel boat. It’s pretty cushy for the most part because it has a permanent mooring on a canal (so no currents and no tides), but guys, there are things to consider when you write your Zuko’s crew fics.

In no particular order, bearing in mind that I am not an engineer:

Steel + water = rust; steel + salt water = super fast rust.

Boats like mine are traditionally lifted from the water or put in dry dock to be painted with bitumen every 2 years to prevent that.  And that’s with fresh water and only the occasonal bump against another boat to worry about.

Anywhere water pools on the deck can have a rust issue (we don’t see any drainage holes on that deck with its solid walls.  Let’s pretend they exist.)  Anywhere that can get hit with salt spray can have a rust issue

The deepest pitting (rust pockets) will be around the waterline, places that get both water and oxygen. If one of those gets deep enough it can actually rust through and you are in a world of hurt.

Coal smoke is acidic. That’s also not great for steel.

Chimneys are another place that rust through pretty quickly, which can put you in a world of hurt because smoke kills, and so does carbon monoxide.

The second deepest pitting  on a boat is generally found on the steel close to the chimney.

If water (rain or salt spray) can get in your chimney you’ve just accelerated that process.

Talking of coal fires…

Anywhere you’ve got a source of fire you’ve got problems if it isn’t well ventilated.  Where is the boiler room? Does it have windows? Does it have vents in the door? How do they control air flow to the coal (and hence the temperature of the resulting fire)?

Where you have coal you have ash. Leave ash sitting too long and it will choke your fire. Leave hot ash in a confined space and you have another carbon monoxide problem.

They’re probably having to chuck ash into the ocean like, every day.

Historically there have been chemical carbon monoxide detectors, which is one possible way you might stop your entire crew dying of a deadly undetectable gas – if Zuko has access to it.

Let’s also talk propulsion

The engine is typically the heaviest part of your boat or ship. It’s normally positioned closer to the stern, which as a result will sit lower in the water than the prow.

Fire nation ships use propellors, which we know because Hakoda’s stink & sinks targeted them.  Where the prop shaft exits the ship is another point where water can get in.  There’s a thing called a stern gland which prevents this by forcing grease into the  area where the prop shaft comes through the hull. This minimises the amount of water that can get in.

Minimum water is still not no water though! There will be a wall to contain water that gets in like this, and modern boats have a bilge pump next to the prop shaft to get rid of it.

This is another point particuarly at risk from rust! Break out the paint again.

If the bilge pump breaks and doesn’t get fixed you quickly have big problems (a neighbour actually sank because of this).

Dark paint + steel + sunlight = surfaces too hot to touch.

Also, interior temperatures that are way, way too hot for comfort.

However, the temperature drops rapidly below the waterline. I spend six months of the year wearing thick woolly socks and legwarmers and the other six months wanting to lie on the floor all the time. And I only have a 2 foot draft.

Cold water + hot boat interior = condensation, which represents guess what? – another rust risk!

Talking of bitumen paint? That stuff gives off fumes that stink and aren’t great for human health.

More to follow when I think of it and have time. I’d love to hear from actual ocean goers on this one because that’s the side of things I know absolute zip about.

[ID: screenshot of tags reading, "and the fact that it was invented by a hobbit who knocked the head of an orc straight off. And the orc's name was Golfimbul." End ID]

sometimes i think about how tolkien said golf exists in middle earth and then just never mentioned it again ever

[I. D.: a tweet by KeithPille.bsky.social on July 16, 2024 reading, “Worth thinking about how long Tolkien goes on in Return of the King about despair being a weapon, and presenting defeat as a forgone conclusion being a deliberate and effective tactic”]

the hobbits organizing a blindfolded taste test with the fellowship except every single food is potatoes

Nerdanel: What are these?!

Fëanor: Dwarf costumes.

Nerdanel: Why? Have you lost your mind?!

Fëanor: How many dwarves in Snow-White?

Nerdanel: Seven.

Fëanor: How many sons do we have?

Nerdanel: ...seven.

Fëanor: Et voilà.

I try not to post about real life serious stuff, but there’s been a lot of… unfortunate essays written about how it is Zuko’s duty to help Azula because Iroh helped him.

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but it is never your ‘duty’ to stick around and help someone through person through their mental illness. That is redoubled when they are abusive or put you in physical danger.

I think most people realize that cartoons do not equal real life and liberties can and SHOULD be taken for fiction, but this trope seems to be gaining traction so I gotta put it out there. When the cabin pressure drops and someone you love is going through a mental breakdown, make sure you put the oxygen mask over your own face first before you help them with theirs. If you know what I mean.

Hyphens, en Dashes and em Dashes

Oh- and let’s not forget the minus sign, that thing on your keyboard that can be misused as any one of the above! 

It took me a long time to understand the differences. 

The minus sign                         (-)

The hyphen                               (-)

The en dash                              (–)

The em dash                            (—)

Visually, not much in it, is there?  

But oh what a difference the length makes! 

The minus sign is a mathematical symbol. That’s it. Don’t misuse it for anything else.

The hyphen is used to join two elements to form a compound word, like  self-restraint. Numbers between twenty-one and ninety-nine should also be hyphenated when they’re spelled out. Sherlock Holmes-Watson or John Watson-Holmes (interesting to know which one wins in the battle). You should also use a hyphen in a compound modifier before a noun, as in The Crossed Keys Inn was a dog-friendly pub.

The shorter en dash  is used when describing ranges and with the meaning “to” in phrases like “Dover–Calais crossing.” It applies to ranges of numbers, such as times, page numbers, or scores (I’ll schedule you from 4:30–5:00). That said, outside of formally printed documents, it is increasingly being replaced with a hyphen, so if you miss this one, Sherlock won’t hang you for it. 

The longer em dash (—) is about as wide as the letter M (duh, now I get why it’s called this). It’s used to separate extra information or mark a break in a sentence.  An em dash is most often used to indicate a pause in a sentence. It’s stronger than a comma, but weaker than a period or semicolon. 

You can use a pair of em dashes to draw special attention to parenthetical information, as in

Sherlock—who was wearing the same purple shirt of sex—entered the room carrying his violin..

You can use a single em dash to add explanatory or amplifying information, especially when the information is surprising:

I opened the door and there she stood—Eurus, my long lost sister.

Em dashes can also signal a sudden interruption, particularly in dialogue:

“Wait! I forgot to tell you—” The door slammed shut between us and I missed whatever John was trying to say.

Interestingly, there is no firm rule about spaces around the em dash (either word—word or word — word). It’s a matter of style. Whichever style you choose, use it consistently throughout your document.

The em dash is a relatively artistic punctuation mark, compared to the more technical hyphen and en dash, both of which need to be used accurately in legal contracts, for example. 

look: our neanderthal ancestors took care of the sick and disabled so if ur post-apocalyptic scenario is an excuse for eugenics, u are a bad person and literally have less compassion than a caveman

Hey bitch!!! I’m back and I still love you and your writing!! Any way, I was wondering if you had any ideas of which elves can tell Elladan and Elrohir apart and which can’t? You’re still amazing byeeeee!!! -🏳️‍🌈

Yaaasss hello again my good bitch!! 🎩🎩

Thanks I love and apprecate you so much!! Let me know if I forgot anyone byeeeeeee

People that can

Elrond -- Even when they were 1 hour old Elrond could tell them apart. 

Celebrian -- By the time they could talk, there was no fooling her  (Heartbreaking sidenote headcanon: After she was rescued from the Orcs she couldn't tell them apart anymore. So they each began wearing a different color. Nothing drastic. Elrohir tended to use grey tone while Elladan uses lighter blue tones so that she wouldn't have to guess and get it wrong because they knew how bad it made her feel.)

Glorfindel -- Can always, always, always, tell them apart. 

Arwen -- Same with Arwen. 

Legolas -- If they stay completely silent, then sometimes he can't tell. But as soon as they talk its game over. 

Erestor -- Can almost always tell them apart but sometimes he pretends he cant. 

Galadrial -- Mind powers, enough said. 

Celeborn -- Usually, but the twins are very aware that their grandfather has been tricked before on several occasions, and therefore can be tricked again. 

Aragorn -- They've never really tested it with him, but this far he's never mixed them up that they've noticed.  

Merry & Pippin -- For some reason the two hobbits have proven to be unflappable by any scheme to confuse them. 

Galion -- You can hide nothing from him. Nothing.

People That Can’t 

Tbh, most people 

Gimli -- No idea. None at all. Never has, not once. People can tell him but as soon as they start moving around again he's lost it. 

Gandalf -- Sometimes he can but more often than not he can't tell unless he's told who is who. 

Thranduil -- Doesn't know and honestly doesn't really care. 

Frodo -- Has a 50/50 chance of getting it right. 

Sam -- Refuses to guess in case he offends anyone.