Breton Wager - 2

Poor Margret - 4

“Yikes!” Esse said, following Kennen’s gaze upward to the ceiling. “Kennen, whose eyes are those? They’re humongous!”

“And they talk to me too.” Kennen told her.

“Really? Kennen, are you insane? Maybe we should call your sister, Heavenly Evenly.”

“No, Esse, look at the walls.” Kennen said.

“Yikes!” Esse said, looking around. “Kennen, did you do this?”

“No.” Kennen answered. “Annaig did.” Suddenly, Esse let out a little squeak. Kennen looked up.

Hello, Essy. Are you a friend of Kennen’s? My name is Annaig.

“Um.” Esse said. “it’s E-S-S-E.” Annaig corrected his mistake. Esse nodded approvingly. “He seems nice.” she told Kennen. Annaig drew a large heart around Esse’s name. “I think Annaig likes you too.” Kennen answered her.

Soon, Esse and Kennen had moved all of Esse’s work into Kennen’s Office. “The floor is too slippery.” Esse said. “Besides, I need more company to work happily.” Kennen’s job that day was to was to go through everyone’s files and see who had a criminal record. Esse’s was to go through the files of the people just moving to The Land of Nimm. “Hey,” Esse said, pulling out a file. “Here’s your sister.” Kennen leaned over to read. It said:

The File of:

Heavenly Evenly likes to eat at elevenly LALALALALA Pie. DODODO, NANANA, Tickle some type of fly Mamamel Pastamaker

“What in the world? Is that really her full name?” Esse asked.

“I never told you?” Kennen answered.

“Does she like pie?” Esse asked. Kennen shrugged. “I would think so. Can’t you look in her file?” he asked. Esse opened it. There on the first page it read:

Likes Pie:Yes/No/Limited

Job: NonDominant Animal Psychiatrist

“Huh.” Esse said. “The pie a bit of a strange thing to put in a file.” Kennen shrugged. “Not if you’re Heavenly Evenly.” he said.

Some time later, Kennen found his first criminal record. “Hey, Esse, did you know that Emelea and her children have a criminal record?” he asked. Esse leaned over to see. “Well, I guess Luc never told me the story.” Esse answered. “Then I will.” Kennen began:

The Story of Emela’s Children

Once upon a time, there lived a girl named Emelea Grapis, one of the most criminal masterminds to this day. Emelea’s husband had run away after she threatened to drop 16 bananas on his head, leaving Emela with her two children. Their names were Heteb and Zoeabby. When Heteb was 16 years old, and Zoeabby was 3, Emelea launched the Great Kidnapping Thing. Queen Alissa lived in a beautiful palace on top of the hill, and because Emelea was the evil twin of her sister, Mistress Amelia, she was invited to live with Queen Alissa. Queen Alissa had three children; Aras, Tanyaasha, and Izzy, who were all kidnapped within a week. Here is how Emelea did it: Zoeabby, even though she was only three, could already speak fluently in English, Lithuanian, and German. So every night, Zoeabby would go through the hall outside Queen Alyssa’s part of the castle with her mother’s cloak on, and sing: “Aš miręs nuotaka aš sakau ‘boo!’ jums bus išsigandęs. BOO!” (the spell works better when said in Lithuanian. Besides, everyone there was from New Forkie, and so saying it in a language no one probably understood was a good idea.) Zoeabby would happily knock out anyone who was within three feet of her (this usually got a nosy princess listening at the door). Zoeabby would then grin and run off to get her mother. Emelea would take the cloak from Zoeabby, and go kidnap the nosy princess at the door. After the first three kidnappings, Emelea decided to kidnap all the other children in the building. She started with Queen Eneel’s children; Meuh and Raychell, and then to everyone else's children. Unfortunately, Emelea made the mistake of kidnapping Judge Anna’s granddaughter, and Judge Anna arranged a meeting with Neemzay, the genius of the castle, who was kidnapped soon after that, and working on means of escape. Judge Anna’s daughter, Queen Airuhbelluh, took a wild guess and got Heteb arrested. One of the queens, Queen Avarose, went insane and kidnapped Zoeabby. Emelea knew that she could either give herself up, and help the children, or run away and leave them. Emelea, knowing how a good parent should act, threw square-shaped dogs at anyone who tried to ride an elephant, and ended up escaping with her children as well (the kidnapped children were found two weeks later by Judge Anna and Inspector Ollie).

“Wow.” Esse said. “I had no idea.”

“Neither did I.” Kennen agreed. They continued while talking about Emelea’s children.

But soon after that, Kennen picked up a new file. “Hey Esse, look at this.” he said. Esse leaned over to see. The file read,

File of Lucjusz Bnmq Erty

“Oh.” Esse said. She looked confused and sad. “Luc has a criminal record? What does it say?”

“Yeah. About that. It’s weird because, you know, no one but us a Weasel Water lou are supposed to touch these but, well, I’ll just show you.” Kennen flipped open the first page and handed the file to Esse.

Status: Deceased LIVING!!!

Or else prove that he’s dead!

“Whoa.” Esse said. “So Luc isn’t a criminal. Who would do that?” Kennen shrugged. “Well, he sighed his name at the bottom.” Kennen said, showing her.

Helpful Comments by Ulul Iflandoonia

“WHAT?!” Esse said. “My Great-Uncle Crab wrote this? Uh!” Kennen looked puzzled. Esse explained for him. “My great-Uncle Crabulul is so rude. But somehow he became a critic, and since he’s a quickwolf, he’s made it his business to go everywhere people want him out of.”

“What’s a quickwolf?” Kennen asked.

“Quickwolves can go so fast, that they vibrate through walls and stuff like that.” Esse answered.

“Wow. So he got into our files?” Kennen said, leafing through the others to see if Crabulul had made any other comments. “Hey, um, Kennen, Annaig is talking to you.” Esse said. Kennen looked up.

Are you sure Luc really is dead?

“Well, um, yeah, right Kennen?” Esse answered.

“Well, yes, I saw it happen! Wait, no. I mean, I saw him go all limp but maybe…” Kennen said, thinking hard.

Maybe you should find out. If you go get supplies from Crabulul I can teleport you wherever you want.

“Oh, Annaig! I want to hug you!” Esse said, jumping up and down. “C’mon, Kennen, let’s go to Great-Uncle Crab!”

I’m looking for more writeblrs to follow so give this the ol’ reblog and/or like (especially if you write sci-fi) and I’ll check you out

Breton Wager - 3

After Rose returned with the pens, Breton got to work on the posters. He sat on the stage across from Rose, who, despite his previous claim, was not being of much help at all. Nashaadh bustled around backstage, moving boxes and hanging the posters that Breton completed.

“Breton, are you going to the Masquerade Ball on Friday night?” Nashaadh asked after a little while.

“I’m going!” Rose interjected before Breton could even conceive an answer. “I’m going with Nashaadh,” he added.

“You really should come with us, Breton,” Nashaadh invited.

“Aw, Nashaadh, do you have to go and invite your cousin?” Rose pouted.

“Rose, he’s your friend too!” Nashaadh scolded. “It’s a school hosted event, he should go anyway!”

“I know, I was just kidding,” Rose said calmly. “You should definitely come, Breton.”

“How?” Breton asked, not pausing his decoration of Nashaadh’s posters.

“Well, I’m going as a phoenix,” Nashaadh reminisced, setting down a box and plopping down beside Breton and Rose. “All red and yellow and fire . . .”

“And I’m going as a parrot,” Rose shared, scooting closer to Nashaadh. “All color and sleek good looks.”

Rose tossed his wavy, dark red head of hair. Nashaadh laughed.

“You really should go, Breton,” Nashaadh repeated.

“What would I go as?” Breton argued politely. “You guys already took phoenix and parrot.”

“You could be a woodnymph bird,” Nashaadh offered.

“Oo! Yes! You’d look good in purple, Breton!” Rose agreed, clearly enthused.

“You really would, Breton!” Nashaadh exhibited excitement. “There must be a beautiful indigo pattern jacket somewhere we can buy for you!”

“Yes! And I have these wonderful pants that will match gorgeously!” Rose continued.

“Ohmygosh, Breton, we are totally building your costume for you!” Nashaadh squealed. “You are coming on Friday!”

Breton remained silent as Nashaadh and Rose used the previously discarded markers to plan his costume. Silently, he was pleased. Nashaadh and Rose were his two closest friends. And although a Masquerade Ball sounded scary, if he went to one, he would want to go with Nashaadh and Rose.

Besides, with the Christian hanging around, it might be a good idea to live in the moment.

Weasel Water Lou of the Peace in Carlos - 10

December 2nd was a day of mourning for Luc. They had his funeral and made a grave. They filled a coffin with lots of things to represent him and then buried it deep into the ground. Esse told about their adventure. Kennen told of Luc’s death. Everyone understood that after Luc was dead,Kennen of course could not help him. Luc’s parents and siblings were given gifts. It was safe to say that Luc would never be forgotten. He helped Esse find out how to open the painting. He saved Esse when Ursula Kinns kidnapped her. Luc did lots of other wonderful deeds before Esse even knew him. Luc was truly a wonderful bear. Esse cried through most of it. But Kennen comforted her by gently landing on her shoulder. “Thanks, Kennen.” she whispered in his ear. “Throughout my whole adventure, I’ve had friends. I’m glad you’re here now that Luc is gone.” And that is how Esse survived the funeral of her best friend. With a friend, who will always be there for her. And she will return the favor, and always be there for him.

THE END

The Christian

Illustration courtesy of Teepi Guest

Breton Wager - 4

Breton went home that day on the bus with Rose. Rose sat on Breton’s lunch twice, and then he sat on Tony’s lunch, and by that point they were home and there were no more lunches to sit on.

Breton entered his house and was pleased. He could hear his mother in the kitchen and his father in the parlor. He had little homework, and he would complete it in the kitchen beside his mother, with his father in view. It would be a good ending to his Wednesday.

Breton took a seat at the kitchen table. His mother was making soup.

“Welcome home, Breton, how was school?” she asked, tossing carrots with a flourish.

“Indeed, Breton! How was you day?” echoed his father from his seat in the parlor.

“May I go to the Masquerade Ball on Friday?” Breton asked his parental unit.

“By yourself?” his mother asked, adding beets to the supper stew.

“I was planning on attending with Nashaadh and Rose,” Breton explained.

“Oh, Nashaadh! How is she?” his father asked. “You know, I haven’t called Ashley in quite a while.”

“And Rose,” his mother added. “When’s the last time we saw Rose? What’s his real name again?”

“Roosevelt,” Breton answered, assuming that this meant his masquerade attendance was approved.

“Ah, yes, named after that old president we had all that time ago!” Breton’s mother continued on.

“I think I shall call Ashley right now,” Breton’s father mused from the parlor.

Breton quietly slipped out of time.

It had been a rewarding but long day, and Breton had gotten about half an hour closer to bedtime when he heard a familiar voice.

“Breton! Breton! Are those your parents?” the Christian floated in through a wall, floppy arm dangling exasperatedly.

“Yeah,” Breton said. He wasn’t certain why, but once again, he found himself stopping his forward progression to wait for the Christian.

“They are adults, you know. Awfully so. Well above the age of eighteen. I shall approve of one parent at a time, please,” the Christian commanded boastfully.

Breton began to continue forward towards bedtime. He felt the Christian’s arms bumping against his head as he walked.

“Your father is the brother in law of Ashley Sonjan, correct?” the Christian asked forcefully.

“Yes,” Breton answered, really only half paying attention to the loud puppet. It really did remind him of the real Christian.

“Nikodemus Bauerbecken, brother of Ashley Sonjan. Patterson and Ashley Sonjan. Two daughters: Nashaadh Sonjan and Naulii Sonjan,” the Christian recited, as if this memorization of facts was even at all worth showing off.

“Interesting,” Breton mumbled distractedly.

“Ashley Sonjan invented the equation for time travel,” the Christian continued. “Are you special, Breton? Or is your aunt the real hero of the story?”

Breton jumped back into time with a smack, hitting his bed with much more force than he meant to. He didn’t sleep well that night.

Esse Iflandoonia

Illustration courtesy of Teepi Guest

Weasel Water Lou of the Peace in Carlos - 8

Esse awoke on a soft bed of moss. She sat up. Everything in the little room was soft and mossy. Even the walls were covered in moss. A kind looking lady came in. “Oh!” she exclaimed. “You’re awake!” She hurried to get something off the stove. “My name is Nurse Moss.” said the lady, pouring the liquid into a cup. “My name is Esse.” Esse said as Nurse Moss handed her the cup. Esse drank the liquid. It tasted wonderful. “Once you feel up to it, I will take you to meet Master Cameron. He greets all the newcomers.” Nurse Moss was saying. “Is Kennen doing okay?” Esse asked. “Your bird friend broke his wing, but Doctor Lexie is caring for him. He’ll be better in no time.” Nurse Moss answered. For the rest of the day, Esse rested and talked with Nurse Moss. It was very relaxing. At one point, Esse was telling Nurse Moss about the tapestry by Weasel Water Lou. “My friend Luc helped me.” she said. “That was before I met Kennen.” “Where is Luc now?” Nurse Moss asked. “Um, he, he, um, was, um, carried away by evil villians. He’s probably dead now.” Esse started to cry again. “Oh dear, you poor thing.” Nurse Moss said. “You really must talk to Master Cameron tomorrow. How are you feeling?” “Okay, I guess.” Esse sniffled. “Well good.” nurse Moss said. “You will meet him tomorrow.”

The next day, Nurse Moss woke Esse early. “Master Cameron is a very busy person. You have to see him when he’s not busy with Mistress Amelia. Or the children. I used to be their nurse.” she said. “The children?” Esse asked groggily. “Yes.” Nurse Moss said. “They have seven; the twins, Ella and Ei, Gemma, Lie, Beth, Ai, and Izzy. Gemma is just about your age, now that I think about it. Now, get dressed and we’ll be off.” Nurse Moss hurried Esse into some clothes that were completely blue and glowed faintly. Stepping out of her room for the first time, Esse saw what looked like a jungle. Ring-tailed lemurs were everywhere. They they climbed on vines that strung from the trees. They scampered up trees covered in vines. They huddled in the leafy bushes. Nurse Moss hurried Esse to a high wall surrounding a magnificent palace. The palace itself was made of wood and covered in vines. Flowers sprouted from the walls. Esse was amazed. “I’ve never seen anything like this before.” Esse told Nurse Moss. “Well now is your chance to enter the palace.” she answered. They first room of the palace was coated in trees and vines and flowers just like the outside. Nurse Moss knocked on a big lump that stuck out of the wall. The wall collapsed and led into a room. The room was more like a beach than a jungle. The walls and floor were made of sand. A strange sun-like light floated above Esse’s head. The gentle sound of ocean waves was heard from the lapping of water in a corner of the room. A tall man stood in the center of the room. He was wearing a green waterproof jumpsuit sort of thing and sunglasses. “Hello, Esse.” he said. “And welcome to The Meadow of Nimm. I am Master Cameron. And this is Mistress Amelia.” Master Cameron gestured to a brown-haired lady by his side. She was also wearing sunglasses and the waterproof jumpsuit. Her’s was red. Mistress Amelia smiled and waved at Esse. “Many people come here. They come from Eerht, they come from Ring. They come from this planet and from many planets. I, personally, am from a place you probably never heard of called Earth. Amelia comes from here. This is her native village.That is how diverse we are.” Master Cameron explained. “You are welcome to stay forever. But you may also leave whenever you want. You never have to come back.” Esse nodded. “I might want to go home.” Esse said. “And maybe see what my friend thinks.” Master Cameron nodded. “I understand.” he said. Then he turned to Nurse Moss. “May Esse consult her decision with Kennen?” he asked. “I’ll ask Doctor Lexie.” Nurse Moss said. “Oh, um, Master Cameron?” Esse asked. “Yes?” Master Cameron answered. “Do you know anyone named Weasel Water Lou?” Esse asked him. Master Cameron and Mistress Amelia exchanged glances. “Yes. She is my secretary. Would you like to meet her?” Master Cameron asked. “I want Kennen to come too.” Esse said. Master Cameron thought a bit. “You may meet her on Wednesday. Is that okay, Miss Moss?” he asked. “Oh, yes. Doctor Lexie will be done by then.” Nurse Moss answered. So Esse and Nurse Moss said goodbye, and they went back to the hospital. “You will see Kennen tomorrow.” Nurse Moss reassured Esse as she put her to bed. “Thank you, Nurse Moss.” Esse said.

The next day, Monday, Esse woke early before Nurse Moss was awake. She got dressed and waited for Nurse Moss to wake up. Nurse Moss awoke, and, seeing Esse already up, hurried to get breakfast ready. Soon, they were on their way to Kennen’s lobby, where they were meeting Kennen. Kennen was waiting in the lobby with Doctor Lexie, who greeted them kindly. Kennen was back to normal bluebird size with his left wing in a cast. Kennen flew over to Esse. “Kennen!” she said happily as he landed on her shoulder. “I haven’t seen you for a while! I missed you.” “I missed you too.” Kennen said, nuzzling into her neck. Nurse Moss and Doctor Lexie sat down in chairs to talk. Esse and Kennen sat on the floor. “Guess what?” Esse asked Kennen. “What?” he asked.

“We get to meet Weasel Water Lou!”

“Really?”

“Really!”

“Wow.” Kennen said. “I’ve never met her before. Where does she live?” “She’s Master Cameron’s secretary.” Esse answered.

“No way, really?”

“Really.”

“Awesome.” Kennen said, nodding. “When?” “Wednesday.” Esse said. “I can’t wait.” After they talked about a few more things, it was time to go back to their rooms. It was the same thing Tuesday. and then Wednesday finally came.

Poor Margret

At first, Kennen didn’t know where he was. Then he remembered; sleepover with Esse at Nurse Moss’ house. Esse stood up and stretched. There were no need for beds in Nurse Moss’ house because the floor was so soft. Kennen pretended to be asleep. Esse changed and sat back on the floor. Checking the clock, Kennen had seen it was only 8:10. Nurse Moss woke at 9:30 on weekends. Suddenly Kennen realized: today was the day. This was Esse’s 13th birthday, or, her coronation of Assistant Secretary to Master Cameron and Mistress Amelia. Weasel Water Lou would be teaching her “the ways”. Even though work didn’t start until Wednesday, (and it was only saturday) Esse had been promised a private tour of the palace with Kennen. Kennen would be Esse’s assistant, making him the Assistant to the Assistant Secretary to Master Cameron and Mistress Amelia. Esse bounced over to Kennen to see if he was awake (you could bounce on Nurse Moss’ floor). “Kennen,” Esse whispered, poking Kennen’s wing. “Today is the day!”

“Hmm? What?” Kennen mumbled, opening his eyes and pretending to be tired. He honestly did want sleep. “I said today’s the day,” Esse repeated. “Now hop on my shoulder and we’ll go find Nurse Moss.”

“I can fly.” Kennen grumbled. Esse bounced out of the room, Kennen close behind her.

Flying into the kitchen, Kennen saw Nurse Moss preparing waffles. “Yummmmmmmmm.” Esse sighed. “Thanks, Nurse Moss.” Nurse Moss smiled. “Today’s the day!” she replied. “Hey, it’s my day too!” Kennen reminded her. “I know.” Nurse Moss said. “So I made you some seeds and berries. Raspberries, your favorite.” Kennen was awake now. With Kennen at the tabletop bird feeder, and Esse in her favorite cushiony chair, they munched their special breakfast. “Eat up!” Nurse Moss said to Kennen. “You’re too skinny!” Nurse Moss was always complaining about how skinny he was and NOT HOW PLUMP, MISS EVELYN FACE! His pale blue color made him look sort of sick. “You’ll want to hurry.” Nurse Moss said. “The tour starts in- goodness me! The clock stopped!”

“What!?” Esse cried, her fork clattering to the table.

“You have 20 minutes, so no walking.” Nurse Moss told them. “If we ask Doctor Lexie now, maybe we can borrow her MotorHuman360.” Doctor Lexie’s MotorHuman360 was not a human with a motor attached to it, nor a motor car that looked like a human. Doctor Lexie’s MotorHuman360 was simply a really fast guy named Niree who liked to say “vroom vroom.”.

“All right, let’s do it!” Esse said.

“Are you sure?” Kennen asked her. “You hate riding Niree.” Esse grimaced. “You told me that when you ride Niree, you feel too sorry for him, having to carry people around.” Kennen said.

“Well,” Esse considered. “We really should go now.” “Well then,” Nurse Moss said, standing up. “We better hurry before someone else asks.”

Soon, Kennen was flying behind Esse, who was on the back of a very pleased Niree, who loved talking to his riders. “How goes it, Miss If?” Niree said, using Esse’s nickname he gave her.

“Um, okay.” Esse gulped. Despite what Esse had told him, Kennen knew she was terrified. Because of Niree’s fast speed, Esse’s legs were flung out behind her, and she was clinging to Niree’s shoulders for dear life. Niree didn’t seem to notice anything that happened to his passengers. He couldn’t even really hear them. “Ah, yes, my grandmother lives there.” Niree responded. “We call her Grandma Lolch. Funny, isn’t it?”

“I, uh, yeah, um, okay.” Esse agreed. “Oh, yes, you’re right Miss If. That’s a great place to go camping. Grandma Lolch used to take me and R.A. there every winter.” Kennen sighed. Niree was nice, but kind of deaf.

Weasel Water Lou of the Peace in Carlos - 6

Kennen came back a little while later. “What did you find out?” Esse asked. “Well,” Kennen began. “Your friend Luc was talking to this strange bear-lady. But she was telling him how to let you out. He has to tell the door the bear-lady’s name. She keeps saying only you know her name, and that the door is sound proof.”

“Kennen!” Esse exclaimed. “You can tell him her name!” “Well? What is it?” Kennen asked excitedly. Esse beckoned him closer. “Her name is Ursula Kinns.” she whispered. “Okay.” Kennen said. “Ursula Kinns.” He stopped before crawling under the door.

“Esse?” he asked. “Yes? What’s wrong?” Esse asked him. “Will you take me with you? Wherever you and Luc are going, can I go too?” Kennen asked. “Of course.” Esse answered. Only then did Kennen crawl under the door.

A few seconds later, the door opened. Esse ran into Luc’s arms and cuddled in his fur. She felt Kennen land gently on her shoulder. “This is Kennen.” Esse told Luc. “I know.” Luc said. “He helped me save you.”

“Now,” interrupted Ursula Kinns. “Esse must go through the door alone, ahead of the rest of you.” “I’m ready.” Esse said. And she was. This was going to be the big reveal. Esse was going through the door.

“Ursula Kinns.” she said loudly and clearly. A thin force field zipped in front of Luc and Kennen. And Esse stepped through the door.

Esse was standing in a very strange place. There was wet dirt underneath her feet, while large piles of sticks loomed above her. The wet dirt formed a path. Esse could go left or right. She chose right. Esse walked for a little while. The sky was blue, and it seemed peaceful enough. She couldn’t hear much activity. This place wasn’t very exciting.

Presently, Esse came upon a fork in the trail. She could go left or right. Esse chose left. She soon came upon a flatten path of sticks that seemed to serve as a bridge. After crossing the bridge, Esse came upon a large log, that seemed to be set there for the purpose of keeping out intruders. On either side of the log, large walls of more sticks loomed above her. This seemed to be some strange land of sticks.

Esse climbed over the log. The wet dirt path continued through a plain of sticks. The path led to a doorway. At least, Esse decided it was a doorway. It was a break in the walls looming above her. The building had no roof.

Many rooms branched off of the one Esse was standing in. She walked into one of them. In the center of the room were three tall sticks, stuck into the ground. Three large rocks stood around them. As soon as Esse entered the room, the rocks started rolling toward her. They didn’t seem friendly. One of them knocked Esse down, while the other rolled on top of her. The other rolled off somewhere else.

“Hey!” Esse exclaimed. She pushed the rock off her and ran. By the time Esse was past the log, many rocks were after her. Small pointed sticks zoomed past her head. Ducking into a pile of sticks, Esse hid from them. But they still found her.

Wrapping Esse in rope-like strands of stick, they carried her off to a small room with a few rocks guarding it. They tied her hands and feet, then wrapped a long strand of stick around her entire body. Then, the rock people buried Esse into the ground, except for her head. And they left her there for the night.