B'traxia's Hive King Mating Guide For The Recently Transformed!

B'traxia's Hive King Mating Guide for the Recently Transformed!

Gonna go ahead and lay down a large chunk of the first chapter of the fic that I'll be posting for this year's TentaTodd week because I'm excited as hell about it and have like zero patience lol

Summary: Tim finds what he thinks is porn with an emphasis on speculative biology in Jason's apartment, but it turns out the only speculative part is Jason's speculation about whether or not Tim will want to actually for realsies mate with him.

(It's very much playing off of my analysis of Brothers In Blood, which may explain a lot)

(Also if you saw the several sentances sunday thing: this is an extended and much more explicit version of that!)

Normally Tim would pretend to know better than to go snooping through Jason's stuff, especially when a storm had forced him to crash at one of his safehouses unannounced, but c'mon, these are only the bookshelves! What did Jason have them for if not to display the books?? Perfectly reasonable to take a look through the different spines, pull a few out enough to see the covers, maybe actually read one. After all there was no reason to suspect there'd be anything to hide such as-

B'traxia's Hive King Mating Guide for the Recently Transformed!

The cover features a lavish illustration of an alien with a roughly 'centaur' configuration of limbs. It's got a set of massive spikes for front legs that look great for digging and cleaving people in two, and a pair of cat like, pawed, digidigrade back legs. The spine and joints are armor plated, while the soft belly is lined with octopus arms of wildly varying sizes.

The alien is also proudly presenting his three MASSIVE PHALLUSES for the audience.

Tim sputters and laughs, opening the book up and flipping through it lazily.

The quality is ridiculously good overall. It's hand bound, full color, lavishly illustrated with diagrams and charts and cultural notes and- it's honestly hilariously Jason in nature now that he thinks about it. Like, of course, Jason with his snobby love of all things hand crafted would masturbate to some niche fetish shit in a weird format full of way too much worldbuilding. It's probably bespoke too; Tim would lay good money that Jason commissioned the artist himself.

Tim flips back to the first page and starts reading.

Congratulations on your successful chrysalis hatching, my new brethren! Whether you got here by choice or circumstance, this guide is designed to help you understand the most important topic for your new biology and psychology: sex! For most species, sex is merely one activity among many. Most adults spend most of their time on other things, such as making objects or completing economic tasks. The internal impulses of such adults account for a wide variety of needs. Hunger, thirst, tiredness, these are all different sensations because the adult is expected to do different things in order to sate them. This is not so for Hive Kings like us! The primary way a Hive King interacts with the world is through his hive beast workers. His biology does not expect him to labor or travel or do anything other than have sex with his brooders, impregnating them with the hundreds of workers who serve him! When a Hive King's blood sugar levels lower, he does not feel anything. Instead it is his workers which feel a desire to feed him. What happens then, when the Hive King does not have enough workers to keep himself fed? He starts craving sex! Breeding makes more workers and workers are how the Hive King eats! Nearly all desires and cravings are sublimated in this way. Either they are passed to the workers who then fulfill the Hive King's wishes adequately, or they go unsated and are converted into potent breeding lust. Thus sexual desire becomes the primary lens through which the Hive King experiences his own needs and wants. This is especially important information for Hive Kings who choose to remain alone or in very small hives. If you want to go this route, I recommend you carefully track and record your own sexual cravings to ensure that you're getting your needs met. Specific kinks may be signs of specific needs. For instance, Kyalgn from Sector 17 reports that thirst often manifests as desires to swallow his partners whole or have them urinate in his mouth. Note that all of the above merely adds to the already elevated sexual drive of Hive Kings. The deep craving for constant, fertile breeding sex is usually the first instinctual effect of the transformation that a Hive King notices.

Tim is... honestly getting into it a bit. He's got one hell of a thing for breeding, so sue him, and while he's not so much into being the alien, he's enjoying the thought of someone truly insatiable trying to knock him up over and over again despite not being the same species.

It is a bit too wordy for his tastes though. Tim skips passed a frankly obscene amount of detailed anatomical and biochemical analysis in order to get to the good stuff already.

The Hive King first wraps the brooder's body in his tentacles and engages in foreplay. If he can coax at least one orgasm out of the Brooder before the breeding process begins, that is ideal. Happy, relaxed, pleasured Brooders are safer Brooders who bear healthier children. Then the Hive King will carefully fill up the Brooder's cunt with his ovipositor, thrusting shallowly until he reaches the cervix. His dilating hooks will then latch on to the cervix, injecting the brooder with aphrodisic-anesthetic-hypermobilitic chemicals, and begin stretching the Brooder open so that they can receive his eggs. Upon achieving enough dilation for his eggs to fit safely, the ovipositor will thrust a few inches deeper and the Hive King will experience ovipositional orgasm as his body pumps his eggs into his mate's womb. Depending on the size of the eggs and the size of his Brooder mate, this process can take anywhere from thirty minutes to two hours and the orgasm will last until the last egg is inside and his ovipositor unhooks from their cervix. Once all the eggs are safely inside, it's important to move on to the second phase of sex as soon as possible. Remember: the longer the eggs spend unfertilized, the more risky the pregnancy becomes. Next, using his cocks, the Hive King must thrust into his mate's pussy again with both penises, ideally reaching passed the cervix and hitting the back of the womb with each thrust. Every time he orgasms this way he will spill roughly two gallons of cum into his mate. As the sex continues nearly all of this will spill out, but don't worry: this is desirable. The flow of perfluorocarbon seminal fluid must be continuous, as it provides vital nutrients and oxygen to the developing embryos. Do not allow yourself more than 43 minutes rest in between one orgasm ending and beginning to work yourself up for the next orgasm. Ideally, you should simply not stop thrusting for the entirety of the roughly 78 hour pregnancy.

It's completely absurd. More than three days of non-stop pregnant sex while high as a kite on alien aphrodisiac venom.

Gods what he wouldn't give for it to be real.

Tim unbuttons his pants, widening his stance and slipping a hand over his underwear, lightly rubbing the head of his clit through the fabric.

"And just what the fuck do you think you're reading?"

It takes every second worth of Tim's years of training not to startle out of his skin at the sound of Jason's voice.

"Really hot porn." He replies coolly.

Jason's still got his mask on and his hood up but it's clear to see he's taken aback (as was the intent).

"Really?"

"What? You think I don't have kinks?"

His head tilts, his lenses narrowing.

"...Guess you are exactly the right kinda tight laced to be into some freak shit."

"Rude. True, mind you, and pretty fucking hypocritical, but still rude."

Jason hmms acknowledgment of his hypocrisy. His gaze drops from Tim's face to the book and finally down to the hand still in his pants. It is so very hard to read any sort of expression through the masks, but Tim feels like he's got a damn solid bet as to what Jason's feeling right now.

He rolls the dice and starts stroking his clit again, deliberately making it obvious.

Jason's breathing gets heavier, his adam's apple bobs as he swallows thickly, his shoulders go tense - all good signs. Then his hips rock in sympathy with one of Tim's strokes and he knows without a shadow of a doubt that Jason is into this.

Tim grins.

There's something deeply gratifying in getting caught and then shamelessly continuing to pleasure himself. It makes him feel depraved - sinfully self indulgent in the best kind of way.

"So you like imagining yourself as a big scary monster who lives to fuck his eggs into people, huh? Got jealous of the xenomorphs while watching Aliens?"

"Yup. Clearly I don't have to explain the appeal to you."

"Actually, I think you do. I'm only interested in being the one getting bred; I don't honestly get the deal about being the one doing the topping."

Jason grips and leans against the bookshelf, clearly aiming for casual and missing by about a million miles to land firmly in 'seems like he's so horny he might faint' territory.

"Oh, cool. Coolcoolcool- uh, what if I get a towel and get you comfortable on the couch and we compare notes?"

Tim just barely holds himself back from laughing and says, "Sounds great!"

Tags

jaytim Eldritch and uncanny

Observations on Kryptonians:

Their Biology, Behavior and its Dynamic with Beauty

An anecdotal entry by Bruce T. Wayne, regarding his experiences with the Kryptonian People.

Over the course of the last century, Earth and Humanity has become aware that not only are we not alone in our universe- but that we are not alone on our world. At an undisclosed moment in our history, our homeworld became a refuge for the last children of Krypton, a world that was lost to unknown disaster.

Kryptonians are mysterious and alien, a recipe for rejection and prejudice on this planet. Not only this, but they have exceptional powers, which lure our worst impulses of greed and exploitation. We have not always treated them with kindness.

Despite our own lack of humanity, the most notable Kryptonians of our society continue to share their unique gifts and perspectives, choosing to help wherever they can.

As a Jewish man, and a Father, the legacy of the Kryptonian people, both in entrusting our world with their children, but with it, their future in the face of diaspora, humbles me.

I would like to offer my voice of support to our kin from beyond the stars. I have some personal experience with Kryptonians, and will attempt to demystify their habits and nature, to present them to you not as strangers from the skies, but as part of the infinite diversity of our world.

Not to be feared, not be used, but to be welcomed.

ברוכים הבאים לבית שלנו

Caveat on Kryptonian Powers

Most discussions of Kryptonian biology begin and typically conclude with a long list of the powers typical to Kryptonians. These powers are considerable, but are generally used to justify how they are treated. There is no value in me lingering on this much-speculated aspect of our Kryptonian kin.

Instead, I would like to discuss the lesser known traits that I have found to be personally charming.

Diurnalism and Sun-seeking

Kryptonians are naturally diurnal by nature, and are drawn to sunlight. When relaxed, they enjoy basking in our sun's warmth and when injured, or unwell, should rest in either natural sunlight, or be placed near a sunlamp.

Many Kryptonians display a tanned or dark-skinned complexion, which I found initially counterintuitive since it indicates protective melanin in Humans. In a Kryptonian, this coloration is actually indicative of stored solar radiation. In layman's terms, it's a sign of good health in your local Kryptonian.

(Art credit to @domnorian, please support the original work here, it is used here as an example)

Dentition and Diet

The intense demands of the Kryptonian body are supported by an incredibly high metabolism. Although they are primarily sustained by solar radiation, they can and do display a remarkable appetite. This energy is readily burned off by their bodies, so it should be considered offensive to shame or draw attention to how hungry a Kryptonian may appear to a Human.

Instead, attention should be paid to the variety of their diet. I have concerns that Kryptonian nutrition is not necessarily met by traditional human foods, and believe that supplements of various metals, sillica and crystalized minerals may be of great use to them. Further research is indicated, but consider they may not be fully satisfied.

This viewpoint is supported by the Kryptonian dentition, which features a diminutive but handsome set of fangs. As this is one of the more readily visible distinguishing features, some Kryptonians experience self-consciousness when smiling.

If it is of comfort to any Kryptonians reading this, Humans enjoy 'teefies' and like to remark upon the canine teeth of our companion cats and dogs. We find it 'cute'.

Ocular Notes

It has come to my attention that Kryptonian vision is more specialized for use during flight. It has great telescopic capacity, amongst its other various modes, but this can put them at a disadvantage in our society. Being so far-sighted, Kryptonians may struggle to read letters, smaller signs and newspapers without assistance.

If you see a Kryptonian puzzling over a piece of paper, and holding it at arms' length, any offers to help should be gently made. However, Kryptonians are notoriously friendly and inclined to offer help as much as receive it. You may well make a new best friend. In fact you probably will. Statistically.

A smaller note is that Kryptonian eyes- on account of the multiple facets to their vision -all appear to be a unique type of blue. This particular shade is potentially a generative emission of scattered sunlight, though it would require more detailed research and a far longer examination on my part to confirm.

They Purr

Yes, it is true. Kryptonians purr. It is a delight to listen to.

From my observations it seems readily triggered by the presence of children, or a desire to comfort others. As well as by their own contentment, whether physical, emotional and often both.

The frequency of the oscillations seem to differ between the two circumstances, supporting my current theory that this purring is both a form of communication, but separately resonant to encourage bone growth and soft tissue repair in the sick and injured.

Reproduction and Courtship

Having not conducted a relationship with a Kryptonian, I speak from a limited capacity of research. That said, to Humans looking to court Kryptonians, they appear to be receptive to forms of lip contact, and saliva exchange.

Further erogenous zones are speculative, but there is marked sensitivity along the length of the throat and just below the occipital bone.

Love

I put it to you that Kryptonians are not powerful - they are uniquely vulnerable. An endangered culture and people who have shown us compassion alone. They deserve our protection and understanding.

This is the only home they have ever known. They are not strangers from the stars, they are our friends sharing the same sunlight.

They love us. We should love them in return.

B.T.W

PS. @official-clark-kent I am no reporter, but I did enjoy trying my hand at a small thinkpiece. Perhaps we could go fishing sometime?

Tags

bruce lore superfam lore kal lore

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panfriedgarlicbread

7 months ago

"tim is just like bruce" "tim is a mini batman" listen to me. fuck that. tim literally says he is not like batman and he does not want to be like batman. multiple times! throw that shit right out. do you wanna know who tim is a mini-me of?

listen to me. grips you by the shoulders. listen.

tim could be the second coming of lois lane.

they both have this incredibly nosy streak and an inability to stay out of situations if they think they can improve them. they are both fuelled by the need to do what is right and if no one else is gonna do it then by god they will.

"i care so much that i have to do something about it" is a fundamental tim and lois trait. "a locked door just means you have something to hide and i will find it" is also a fundamental tim and lois trait.

they are so similar. i NEED lois to get her hands on tim. i need them to get into hijinks and shenanigans together and i need clark and kon to look at each other and go "jesus christ there's TWO of them now?" as they hurry to go put out a fire. i need lois to hone and refine tim's hubristic streak and i need tim to enable her nosy snooping tendencies. tim & lois could be something beautiful. does anyone hear me. hi for the love of god hello is anyone listening

Tags

tim lore lois lore

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panfriedgarlicbread

11 months ago

Alternatives To Sleeping in Coffins

An Illustrated Guide For Vampires

1. Privacy Tent

2. Antique Chinese Wedding Bed

3. Victorian Box Bed

4. Canopy Bed

5. Full Body Wearable Blanket + Novelty Halloween Mask of Choice

6. Hyperrealistic Black Bear Sleeping Bag (with built in ‘Do Not Disturb’ feature)

7. Tinfoil Bodysuit (For maximized UV protection)

8. Blackout Curtains You Fucking Vampiric Dumbass

in conclusion why in fuck’s name are you sleeping in coffins to begin with you utter shitmuppets

Tags

coffin alternatives

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panfriedgarlicbread

4 months ago

Test Compilation of my writing submissions for the Mecha AU started by @keferon.

Friends in Every Universe

Part 1

Tumblr

Che-che-chu-klunk.

I stand by the belief that Drift/Deadlock and Hot Rod would be friends in any universe. Much to the terror of everyone else. ——————————————

Part 2

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Sightseer Trespasser

Part 2 of Drift/Deadlock and Hot Rod playing air hockey with their remaining brain cells! Ratchet desperately plays referee. —————————————

Part 1.5

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Sightseer Trespasser

Bonus part 1.5 that got lost in drafts. Deadlock and Hot Rod play catch with the brain cell. ——————————————————————— Yep. Deadlock had lo

Part 3

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Keferon

Part 3! Ratchet and Deadlock time. The ray of sunshine has left, leaving us in the cold dark of the angst. Ratchet works through some stuf

Part 4

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Sightseer Trespasser

Part 4 of Drift/Deadlock and Hot Rods adventure in the mecha au! Here comes the Sun do do do do- here comes the Sun at Mach five. ————————

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panfriedgarlicbread

8 months ago

kon is especially fun to me because while obvs ymmv where it comes to figuring out a preferred amalgamation of his backstories, i think of him as a kryptonian with a metagene. as in, to fully depower him, you'd need both kryptonite/red sun and a metagene suppressant of some sort. he is a fucked up and op little freak of nature science.

Tags

kon lore superfam lore

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panfriedgarlicbread

9 months ago

Tim Drake’s Friends (not to be confused with Red Robin’s friends)

Inspired by this post by cryptocism, I bring you: Tim Clique-Breaker Drake.

(Don’t mind me, this is also basically just me taking notes for a fic I’m working on. Tim’s various normal boy friendships. High School Musical has nothing on Tim Drake.)

(One of these days I’ll write half these characters’ DC Database entries. Today is not that day. All characters listed know Tim primarily as Tim Drake; anyone who knows Tim primarily as Robin/Red Robin, or who know Tim equally as Tim and Robin, is not included. If I miss someone… I missed someone.)

Keep reading

Tags

tim lore

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panfriedgarlicbread

11 months ago

Costume. Chitons.

Tags

traditional clothing blanket

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panfriedgarlicbread

9 months ago

"Talia manipulated Jason!" Talia canonically wanted Jason to go anywhere but Gotham, told him he and Dick were the lights of Bruce's life, and spent three years holding the world's angriest teenager back by the scruff of his neck

Tags

talia lore

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