It Was A Great, Great Moment When I Discovered That Asexual Did Not Necessarily Mean Sex Repulsed.

It was a great, great moment when I discovered that asexual did not necessarily mean sex repulsed.

When I first came across the term asexual, years & years ago, the description I found promptly informed me that asexual people were absolutely repulsed by sex, in all forms, all the time. So, I promptly decided that I couldn’t be asexual.

See, I love sex. I absolutely love reading about it & writing about it & watching it & talking about it, I have a dirty sense of humor, & I have a libido too. What I don’t love is having sex. Simple as that. I don’t experience sexual attraction toward anyone & the actual reality of sex – the physical closeness, the fluids, kissing (oh my God, how I hate kissing!), etc. – makes me feel uncomfortable. Knowing that this is a perfectly common, or at least not unheard of, asexual experience would’ve spared me some deeply confusing & hurtful experiences.

So, in case anyone needs to see this today: Asexuality means a lack of sexual attraction. No more, no less. Asexual people generally do not feel sexually attracted to others. This does not mean that they cannot find others aesthetically pleasing or that they are necessarily repulsed by sex, either in theory or in practice.

Sex repulsion means an aversion to sex. Asexual people can be sex repulsed. But not all of them are.