I'll Take All Pls

if there's one thing i really struggle with, it's line art. so this daily challenge is not only challenging me to draw every day, it's pushing me out of my comfort zone so i can learn and grow. i always look at my work and say to myself, "i can't wait to see where i'll be 5 years from now"

i love them

more tasty things

ko-fi | bluesky | insta

2 small round bois

Wrapping up the end of theme "animals through the ages"

I didn't want to flood my feed again, especially with such embarrassing moments.

1. Me as a child. I was my grandma's (dad's side) favorite and she would dress me in a little red riding hood cloak and walk me around the backyard. I don't have any photos because I couldn't bring them with me, but sometimes I think back on those days. I was named after my grandmother and I ended up becoming the black sheep of the family, cutting contact with everyone.

2. Childhood home. I loved that house but had so many bitter sweet memories. I wish I didn't have to look it up for this picture because the new owners made it... pretty terrible.

3. First pet, Lady was already in home by the time I was born but Dusty was the first one I raised. They were both wonderful dogs and probably the reason why I have dogs today.

4. Good lord, teen fashion... At 14, I decided I liked wearing a daily uniform and I wore a black duster and jeans pretty much every damn day. Still practice the personal uniform trend to this day though lol

5. My first job was at Petco. I enjoyed the work but the boss would easily lose her temper with others and yell at me??? Like lady pls.

6. First big trip. I remember a bit of going to Nova Scotia, and of Peggy's Cove Lighthouse. It was the first time I could spend my own money and spent it all on Pokémon cards (it was like $15). My mom said I was wasting my college fund money on useless shit. Spoiler, there was no college fund, and her hating all my life choices continues to this day... BUT I still have ALL those Pokemon cards. Brought them all the way halfway across the world with me =3

7. A proud moment. I think me leaving behind literally everything expect 2 suitcases worth of my shit and moving to the Netherlands was the biggest. People often ask me if it was a tough choice. I wish I could respond, "If my family had loved me, it would have been harder." No regrets.

I'm incredibly behind again but here's art as of late

almost forgot this one, salt and pepper

the shiny Vanillite is soooo pretty

I’ve got such a complicated relationship with art, mostly because it was a way to express myself and my parents didn’t want that. I was a child of immigrants that wanted me to blend in, keep my head down, listen to others and do what I was told. 

When I would draw, they would discourage it, when I wrote they said it was a waste of time. I had no outlet that was appropriate for them and so I created less and less the older I got. My role was that of something they could brag about (when I became a doctor, which obvs didn’t happen) and to compete with their siblings. When I didn’t meet those expectations I was “nothing but a disappointment” and “a regret”.

The only time I was useful was when they realized they could use my talents for their own gains. People only call you selfish if you don’t give them what they want. They don’t care about what you want.

It wasn’t until I was able to run away halfway across the world that I could truly be an artist without their words to hold me back. I finally began drawing again in 2016 and went digital in 2019. 

I could have become an abusive narcissist like my mom or an alcoholic like my dad but instead I’m giving myself to art. My skill isn’t close to where I wish it could be and my voice is small, but it’s my voice. Something AI will never be able to replicate in a thousand years. 

I believe this trend started with patouret on Instagram but seeing so many artists on my feed do it, I wanted to join in as well.