Zahra Had Always Been A Night Owl And Even More So Since She Had Moved Back To The City. Back Home She

My era rn is uncategorizable. The the way I am living is unheard of

cracking open a cold one with the girls except it’s my icy heart and they’re teaching me how to love again

"I get that. I'm kind of doing the same thing," she admitted with an equally uneasy smile that disappeared within seconds. Well, she certainly stressed over work and spent an ungodly amount of time staring at her computer screen. "It'll take a while to figure out what you like doing, especially here. There's so much to do and sometimes that can be a bit overwhelming." She remembered just how spoilt for choice she had felt when she first moved to the city. Zahra had been eager to try absolutely everything to the point where she hadn't known where to start.

"Well, I mean I do like visiting the museums, or art galleries if that's your thing." She shrugged, kicking a pebble along the street as she walked. "There's tons of good live music as well. I tend to take advantage of that. Just depends on what you like."

Matt let out a chuckle at her question, shaking his head and then looking back a her with a mortified look and a shy smile. "Honestly? Work." He chuckled. "That's as far as my plans go right now. I go to work, I come home, eat, sleep. Then work again." He slipped his hands into his pockets and bit the inside of his cheek. He wasn't proud of his routine but he hasn't felt like doing much else for a few months now. Matt carried all alone a baggage way too big for his poor back.

"What do you like to do around the city for fun?" He asked, curiously, not wanting to dampen the mood, so he offered her a kind smile. "Maybe I can learn a thing or two from you."

Glancing at the woman who appeared quite pregnant, Zahra hurried to shake her head. She couldn't possibly involve this kind stranger in her dumb mess of a situation.

"Oh, I can't expect you to help. I made my bed, now I must lie in it, or however the saying goes." Of course she had to oppose, embarrassed she appeared as if she needed help carrying the books she had been dumb enough to check out and now return in one trip. That being said, Zahra had to admit she was just about to give up and escape, leaving the bag and its contents behind. She had to admit defeat and accept the helpful offering, no matter how mortifying.

Nodding, she picked up just a few books, the ones trying to make their own escape. It was a miracle she hadn't actually lost any of them on the way. That acted as a small consolation at least. "Actually, that would be really helpful. Carrying this would be a lot easier if I didn't have to worry about some of these getting lost," she admitted, a hint of defeat in her voice.

For as long as Sage could remember, libraries were one of her happy places. While many of the memories she had of her mother eroded with time, she could remember spending hours of her early childhood happily perusing the many shelves of their local library while her mom held her ever-growing stack of books with an amused smile. Walking up to the library the only thing she looked forward to more than finding a new read was the air conditioning. While summer felt like it had barely begun, it was already kicking her ass. “I hate stairs,” she grumbled as she trudged up the steps, one hand on her lower back and the other fixing her ‘I’m not like other girls, I’m worse’ tote that threatened to slip off her shoulder. She had only borrowed a couple books this time but was already a day late to return them. Something that was minuscule in the scheme of things, but stressed her out endlessly. Finally having made her way up the steps, she stopped beside another patron to also catch her breath. How any person chose to have a baby was beyond her. Even more baffling were the people who chose to have a second baby knowing damn well the little fuckers made it so much harder to breathe. Taking in as deep a breath as she could, Sage glanced down and noticed the tote spilling over with books. “Damn,” she said before she could stop herself, her gaze darting from the overburdened Ikea bag to the breathless woman with a sheepish smile. “Sorry. I won’t ask. Plus, I can’t judge. I usually look like I robbed the place when I leave,” she added though even she had yet to take out quite so many at the same time. Truthfully, it made her feel like she should step up her library game, but seeing how winded the woman was had her reconsidering. “Do you need help? I can’t carry all of them, but I can lighten your load a little.” She held up her practically empty tote as she spoke. Sure there wasn’t far left for her to go, but she knew that if she was struggling, she would have been happy for the help. Hell, if it had been socially acceptable, she would have asked someone to fireman carry her up those damn steps just so she could avoid the struggle.

"But wouldn't that be a beautiful way to go? Being flattered to death. That being said, I would very prefer if you were to stay alive." While making friends had always been somewhat of a daunting task to her, Zahra valued the friendships she had immensely. Yes, she still struggled to open up and share, but that didn't mean she actually wanted to push people away. She was making a conscious effort and luckily Vismaya seemed to appreciate it.

The undeniably delicious smell of the pizza reminded Zahra that while seeing Vismaya was definitely her main priority, she was also quite eager to eat. Having come to realize she hadn't remembered to do a real grocery shop in days, she had raided her snack cupboard earlier in the day, but the pizza in front of her certainly seemed far more appealing than the Goldfish and trail mix she had inhaled. Her head snapped up as Vismaya informed she would paying be paying for the evening. "No way. Can't allow it," she replied with a firm shake of her head. Her father had taught her many important life skills, and somehow fighting over the bill was certainly at the top of the list. Admittedly he was far more creative, often faking toilet breaks in order to pay when others least expected it. "But if you insist, you will have to let me pay for the next two times we go out to eat or have drinks," she added, not wanting to draw out the conversation when they were about to have a good time. Not that Zahra was all that eager to talk about herself.

"I'm okay. Having kind of a writer's block," she admitted with a sheepish smile, "but I'm sure it'll pass. Has happened before." It was true, she had struggled with inspiration before, but somehow this time felt different, more final in a way. "Honestly, haven't been doing anything too exciting stuff since I moved back. But I'm happy to be properly back in New York." That was at least true. "How are you? Hopefully your life is more thrilling than my current existence."

Few people made the cut of occupying Vismaya's extremely limited free time as of late, and Zahra would always be one of those people. Though, Vismaya didn't entirely consider her own company a treasure as of late, feeling like she had formed a habit of monopolizing the conversation just to talk about workplace fusses and, as always, her mother. However, tonight, she wanted to truly catch up with her friend, as she thought of Zahra often and fondly, and had a vested interest in the girl's wellbeing. "Z, I swear you are going to flatter me to death one day. My blood will be on your hands. My beautiful, beautiful blood," Vis teased, her nose scrunching as she giggled at her own lame joke. "Pizza is always the perfect place to start. And it's damn good, too." At that, Vis gingerly placed one of the small ceramic plates in front of her friend, and then helped herself to another slice. "So, firstly, order whatever you want, tonight is on me, and I'll be having no arguments about that, so, shh. Secondly, please tell me how you've been doing. I know I saw you a few weeks ago, but it still feels like it's been a full calendar year."

Even on her most evasive of days, Zahra was unlikely to turn down an offer to meet up with the selected few people she had managed to genuinely befriend. She had sensed Vismaya might have been in need of a good venting session, and no one could fault Zahra for her listening skills. In fact, she often preferred it, finding great comfort in being able to offer some solace even when she couldn't offer anything but her time.

A smile smoothed over her sharp features the moment she spotted her friend. "Oh, you're one to talk. Look at you," she laughed, the absolutely delight of seeing Vismaya evident in her voice. "Are you sure you're not filming an ad campaign for the place? It should be illegal to look that beautiful when eating pizza." Despite her proclivity for awkwardness, compliments came easy to Zahra when they were steeped in truth. "I'd love some pizza. Let's start with that, yeah?"

closed starter for @ofzahras | around 7pm, the newsroom bar in queens

Work, work, work, that was the bittersweet life sentence that Vismaya had imprisoned herself within-- at least it felt like a prison, after a particularly grueling week in the office, and weeks without being able to see her friends. She needed this night out, even if it was just a bunch of overpriced drinks in an overcrowded bar on a tuesday night. Because of her need to be away from her apartment as soon as possible, Vismaya had arrived at the newsroom much earlier than she'd asked Zahra to meet with her, and was already three slices deep into an exorbitantly priced pizza margherita. Just as she finished off her first glass of champagne, she spot her friend out of the corner of her eye, and lit up like a christmas tree. "Z!" she called, all too enthusiastically, standing to wave her friend over to their quiet corner table, champagne and excitement turning her into a true spitfire: "I'm so happy you're here. Did you get even more beautiful? You did. You always do. How are you? I hope the traffic getting here wasn't too bad. How's school going? Do you want some pizza?"

AIYSHA HART as SAM RAILSTON — Line of Duty, 5x05

Zahra grimaced as the woman spoke, feeling dumber by the moment for picking such a hot day for her pilgrimage to the library. Not that she should have checked out all the books in the first place considering just how unwilling she had been to start even reading them. Most of them hadn't even left the bag which had at least made gathering them up a simple task.

"Already did, unfortunately. The library is my final stop," she admitted, carefully kicking the bag as if trying to relieve some pent-up frustration. Unfortunately the kick did very little to move the bag or its contents any nearer the entrance. "This weather must be some sort of a punishment from the universe since I didn't even bother reading most of these. So, you know, you have me to thank for this."

in her heart shaped pink shades and jean skirt, Isabelle had been walking back home from a little trip downtown to see her girlfriend at her boxing club and have dinner with her (or more like, try to get her to stop throwing herself at the punching bags like a goddamn maniac for more than five minutes to drink some water or at least something cool with electrolytes in it, eat something, cool off for a while...)

She had been trying to wave down a taxi, but it had been of no avail, the streets too busy and thrumming with activity, burning under a hot July sun, everyone rushing home. Her phone was dead and she had forgotten her power bank back home so she was only growing more irritable by the minute...

Trying to cool off, she stopped at a little café to get herself an iced blueberry slushie, had stood at the window outside afterwards, looking at her flickering reflection in the glass pane as she reapplied her gloss when she noticed the woman near her. Pushing her shades up onto the top of her head, she blinked, immediately feeling bad for her. "oh wow... Don't tell me you gotta haul an entire library's worth of books somewhere further than a block away from here in this heat..." She sounded a little too surprised, her senses somehow both dulled and muddled from the scorching heat of the day.

"I highly recomend it. Works better than any melatonin or sleeping pill I've tried." Admittedly reading academic literature related to her research project before bed had caused some rather anxious dreams for Zahra, but sometimes restless sleep was better than no sleep at all. She was still hopeful a breakthrough would eventually come, and the smart, logical part of her that was highly unlikely to happen if she evaded sleep any more than she already did. The chapters she had written while completely sleep-deprived were hardly worth keeping and not anything she wanted to share.

Zahra nodded, grateful Birdie didn't seem to expect any more words of praise for helping her out. "It's kind of the only thing that is really expected of me at this point, you know. Well, that and writing," she explained, "so realistically I should have enough time to get through them." She definitely hadn't.

As much as Birdie liked to learn all about all sorts of things, the title of the book wasn't one that held her attention. "Sounds like it." A snort followed her comment before she continued, "You might be onto something there with the bedtime reading. If I read something like that, it might put me right to sleep." Maybe that wasn't such a bad idea. Her sleep schedule had been a mess for who even knew how long at this point, so honestly she would be willing to try anything to get it even remotely on track again, even if it meant reading something that might bore her to tears.

"It's no problem." She brushed off the thanks as she looked over the books in her hands. Even when she was younger and on track to becoming one of those gifted kids she didn't think she would've been capable of getting through all this material. "Jeez, how do you even find the time to read all this? I'm lucky if I manage to find the time to read two or three books in a month."

"See, you're only being smart and responsible. God knows I end up buying all sorts of weird shit when I go food shopping hungry. And somehow I never actually end up picking things I could turn into an actual meal. Just, I don't know, the biggest watermelon I can find and candy bars I liked as a kid." Admittedly her shopping trips were rarely particularly well-thought-out, mostly because she could not bring herself to plan or, god forbid, meal prep. Although maybe cutting up and storing a giant watermelon could be seen as a form of meal prepping. "I once had a nightmare about that super expensive LA grocery store. Woke up screaming."

Violet nodded along, eyes becoming bigger than her stomach. "I saw some crepes listed, how does that sound? They have one with nutella and strawberries which is always a classic. I definitely know I'll need a side of bacon that's for sure. Okay yep, I'll do the crepes with a side of eggs and bacon. It might not taste all good together, but I want to try it." She laughed, setting down her menu with finality. "I desperately need to go food shopping, so this will give me the strength to brave the supermarket. People can be ruthless if you get between them and their Greek yogurt."