Tshirt That Says "IF U ASK ME ABOUT MY CAREER I WILL KILL MYSELF IN FRONT OF U"

tshirt that says "IF U ASK ME ABOUT MY CAREER I WILL KILL MYSELF IN FRONT OF U"

More Posts from Nozescaramelizadas and Others

1 year ago

One of the things that’s really struck me while rereading the Lord of the Rings–knowing much more about Tolkien than I did the last time I read it–is how individual a story it is.

We tend to think of it as a genre story now, I think–because it’s so good, and so unprecedented, that Tolkien accidentally inspired a whole new fantasy culture, which is kind of hilarious. Wanting to “write like Tolkien,” I think, is generally seen as “writing an Epic Fantasy Universe with invented races and geography and history and languages, world-saving quests and dragons and kings.” But… But…

Here’s the thing. I don’t think those elements are at all what make The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings so good. Because I’m realizing, as I did not realize when I was a kid, that Tolkien didn’t use those elements because they’re somehow inherently better than other things. He used them purely because they were what he liked and what he knew.

The Shire exists because he was an Englishman who partially grew up in, and loved, the British countryside, and Hobbits are born out of his very English, very traditionalist values. Tom Bombadil was one of his kids’ toys that he had already invented stories about and then incorporated into Middle-Earth. He wrote about elves and dwarves because he knew elves and dwarves from the old literature/mythology that he’d made his career. The Rohirrim are an expression of the ancient cultures he studied. There are a half-dozen invented languages in Middle-Earth because he was a linguist. The themes of war and loss and corruption were important to him, and were things he knew intimately, because of the point in history during which he lived; and all the morality of the stories, the grace and humility and hope-in-despair, was an expression of his Catholic faith. 

J. R. R. Tolkien created an incredible, beautiful, unparalleled world not specifically by writing about elves and dwarves and linguistics, but by embracing all of his strengths and loves and all the things he best understood, and writing about them with all of his skill and talent. The fact that those things happened to be elves and dwarves and linguistics is what makes Middle-Earth Middle-Earth; but it is not what makes Middle-Earth good.

What makes it good is that every element that went into it was an element J. R. R. Tolkien knew and loved and understood. He brought it out of his scholarship and hobbies and life experience and ideals, and he wrote the story no one else could have written… And did it so well that other people have been trying to write it ever since.

So… I think, if we really want to write like Tolkien (as I do), we shouldn’t specifically be trying to write like linguists, or historical experts, or veterans, or or or… We should try to write like people who’ve gathered all their favorite and most important things together, and are playing with the stuff those things are made of just for the joy of it. We need to write like ourselves.


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2 years ago

no, listen, when I say I want to integrate more specific solarpunk stuff in my life, i don’t mean to ask for yet again new “aesthetic” clothes that now you have to buy or make to show your support of the movement (screw that i’m consuming enough as it is), or more posts about impossible house goals, or whatever, I’m asking you what my options to build a portable and eco friendly phone charger are, im asking you viable tiny-appartment edible plants growing tricks on a budget,  im asking tips to slow down when my mind and society tell me im not fast enough, i don’t need more rich art nouveau amateurs aesthetics or pristine but cold venus project, okay, i know i should joins associations where I am tho i’m constantly on the move, thanks for that, just, you know, can we get a bit more practical ??? how do I hack my temporary flat into going off the grid for the time i’m here


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6 months ago

I'm HAPPY about CLEANING for the FIRST time in my LIFE

because it's MY house!!!!!


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4 months ago

If anyone remembers the old story about how male prisoners were found to be calmed when their cells were painted pink; (oft cited to prove that the color pink has a calming effect on men) apparently this research was replicated with other paint colors and it was found that any color of paint has the same effect, including painting the walls the same color that they were before. As it turns out, you have to clean in order to paint, and people are happier when their environment has been recently cleaned. The obvious takeway is that correlation does not equal causation, but the even MORE obvious takeaway is the many times proved but seldom acknowledged law that one should never attempt to extrapolate general principles out of studies done in a prison


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2 months ago

do people really love drinking that much? that they celebrate their successes by drinking whiskey (which tastes like rubbing alcohol btw)??

I had a drink last night for the first time in months, a strawberry caipirinha, and by the 3rd sip, I was kinda regretting not having ordered a strawberry soda instead.

do people really enjoy the taste of alcohol that much?


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6 months ago

Uh. "knee" is a masculine noun in Portuguese. Idk what your coach was doing. It's "o joelho"...

i love it actually when nonnative speakers make mistakes that reveal how their native languages work.

lots of koreans online say they "eat" drinks which would assume they only have one word which covers the concept of consumption.

arabic immigrants in sweden (my mother included) have a hard time differentiating between "i think/i believe/my opinion is" which suggests that in arabic these different modalities of speaker agency is treated as one or at least interchangeable.

swedish speakers in english will use should/shall/have to/must with much higher nuance precision than native english speakers, to the point where they sound well awkward, because the distinction between these commands in swedish is much clearer than in english. i make mistakes between is/am/are and has/have constantly because swedish only has one pronoun covering all grammatical persons.

i've heard speakers of languages without gendered pronouns (finnish, the chinese dialects, and a tonne more) make he/she mistakes because it's hard(!!) to learn two or more gendered pronouns and when to use them correctly.

how neat is that?! it add a charm to international english usage in particular and make our appreciation of both our native languages and our learnt ones stronger...!!


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4 months ago

I lost it at "cheap and affordable". not in my country, it isn't. downloading pirated ebooks is what's cheap and mobile. however, it depends on the cloud, like you said.

nozescaramelizadas - •❅──✧❅✦❅✧──❅•
nozescaramelizadas - •❅──✧❅✦❅✧──❅•
nozescaramelizadas - •❅──✧❅✦❅✧──❅•

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6 months ago

Effeminate dentist: You need to brush more on your gums-- hold on why am I "effeminate?" What? I'm literally just a normal dentist. A masculine one, even.

Me: (struggling to speak through the dentist's fingers) youw weren't shupposhed to shee that


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nozescaramelizadas - •❅──✧❅✦❅✧──❅•
•❅──✧❅✦❅✧──❅•

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