I Made A Thing. 

I’ve come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog’s a bitch-ass motherfucker, he pissed on my fucking wife! That’s right, he took his hedgehog-fuckin’ quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife, and he said his dick was “this big,” and I said “that’s disgusting,” so I’m making a callout post on my Twitter.com: Shadow the Hedgehog, you’ve got a small dick, It’s the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here’s what my dong looks like! That’s right, baby, tall points, no quills, no pillows — look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong! He fucked my wife, so guess what, I’m gonna fuck the Earth! That’s right, this is what you get: my SUPER LASER PISS!! Except I’m not gonna piss on the Earth, I’m gonna go higher!! I’m pissing ON THE MOON! How do you like that, Obama?! I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT!! You have twenty-three hours before the piss drrrrroplllllllets hit the fucking Earth! Now get outta my fucking sight, before I piss on you too!

Words I use as gender neutral terms

Dude

Bro

My guy

Lads

Words I will absolutely stop using if you feel uncomfortable with them

Dude

Bro

My guy

Lads

You know why I love AUs? Because the whole point of them is that everything is changed, and yet these two people are still going to meet and fall in love- that they’re so set in stone and so meant to be that you can change literally everything in a hundred universes and they’ll fall in love over and over again. 

An activate charcoal AND grapefruit smoothie called "what will your meds do ;)"

Love that in a lot of classic literature people just “randomly” fall ill but bro their homes were stacked to the roof with arsenic and asbestos and lead and radium of course they were sick all the time.

I own a Bad Dragon hoodie just so I can wear it in public and nobody can say anything without admitting that they know what it is.

Standard Art Print Sizes (in & px)

4” x 6”        (600 pixels x 900 pixels) 5” x 7”        (750 pixels x 1050 pixels) 6” x 6”        (900 pixels x 900 pixels) 8” x 10”      (1200 pixels x 1500 pixels) 8.5” x 11”   (1275 pixels x 1650 pixels) 11” x 14”    (1650 pixels x 2100 pixels) 12” x 12”    (1800 pixels x 1800 pixels) 12” x 16”    (1800 pixels x 2400 pixels) 16” x 20”    (2400 pixels x 3000 pixels) 18” x 24”    (2700 pixels x 3600 pixels) 19” x 13”    (2850 pixels x 1950 pixels) 20” x 24”    (3000 pixels x 3600 pixels) 24” x 24”    (3600 pixels x 3600 pixels) 12” x 36”    (1800 pixels x 5400 pixels) 24” x 36”    (3600 pixels x 5400 pixels)            

i’m gonna draw today  i’m gonna draw today  i’m gonna draw today  i’m gonna draw today  i’m gonna draw today  i’m gonna draw today  i’m gonna draw today  i’m gonna draw today  i’m gonna draw today  i’m gonna draw today 

crying ideas

personally I don’t like crying (stresses me the f out) but I do love some kinds of crying.

the harsh screams and cries of someone finding a loved one dead or seeing them die. The raw sound of grief that the character just can’t hold back. 

The tears that come with no sound, the whumpee is in too much pain to hold them back. but at the same time is too numb for any actually sounds so all that comes out is the tears. 

the whumpee holds up the tough guy act for the entire whumpe session until the whumper leaves them alone. that’s when the tears come and they cry.

another good “tough guy” one is when the whumpee finally breaks in front of their team/team/family. which then brings on a very nice group hug.

character A shows up at B’s house in the middle of the night, bruised and soaking wet from the storm outside. B doesn’t even have time to ask what’s wrong before A just starts crying hard. B pulls A inside and they just hug for a while.

two friends on a battle field lean on each other and share a few tears for their fallen comrades.

and my personal fav, Character A finds B alive after being separated during whatever whump/trauma scene. just the tears of happiness that come pouring out as they embrace each other. (I like using this one for scenarios like “big sibling finds younger sibling” or parental figure finds child”)

Actually life is beautiful because the sound I make while trying to breathe around hot food sounds like my dog trying to eat an apple. When I yawn my cat tries to put his face in my mouth like a little dentist man and when he yawns I put my finger in his obligate-carnivore trapzone and we both know he will not hurt me. When I do not fold my clothes, they do not hold it against me.

I am demonstrably sad, and lonely, and full of fear. But there are other people who will hold my hand, who will point out the hawk overhead, who will give you That Look in a public place. The other day at a coffee shop a child said "look! It's snowing!" so all of us strangers went to go look out the windows. It wasn't the first snow and it won't be the last but wasn't it lovely, like that?

How wonderful to live in a world where birds and frogs both say beep! How wonderful to have an ocean of beautiful sharks with their dinosaur teeth! How wonderful the moon and her changing face, how wonderful the bees and their dancing to communicate, how wonderful shrimp and their forbidden layers of vision! How wonderful, you, and what you will give the world! The way we love things enough to spend entire blogs devoted to them? How people will let me explain my Pokemon team to them? How we will both jump at the scare in the movie, how we laugh so loudly, how it feels to give someone your baking? How wonderful to be alive. I am sorry for forgetting.

This is the process of getting better. With wonderful people and wonderful strangers and wonderful friends: I am getting better, slowly. Thank you, whoever you are. In some way, you've been wonderful, and left a wonderful place in the world to ripple out to me. In some small way - isn't it beautiful - I promise, you've been helping.