Monku Hatsune

I spent a week and a half making this

(Broke: Ares is a terrible, violent and evil God who enjoys death and destruction)

(Woke: He's basically Hoss Delgado from The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy but with a few less braincells and is an absolute himbo who loves 5 things in life: His mom, food, dogs, Aphrodite and VIOLENTLY BEATING THE SHIT OF HIS ENEMIES)

Epic but it's just a DnD game

DM: “The cyclops pulls out a club and takes a swing. Everyone make a dexterity saving throw” Odysseus: “Nat 20!” Eurylochus: “17!” Polites: “That’ll be a nat 1…” *Polites’s miniature is knocked from the board*

DM: “Odysseus walks off with the wind bag. Everyone make a wisdom saving throw” Eurylochus: “…I got a 3” DM: “You gotta see what’s inside that bag” Eurylochus: “But I’m Odysseus’s second in command, surely I’d tru-“ DM: “YOU GOTTA SEE WHAT’S INSIDE THAT BAG”

Odysseus: “I must be a god like you, ‘cause I got this root from the ground with my bare hands!” DM: “Make an intimidation check” Odysseus: “…yeah that’s a 1” Circe: “Hermes gave it to you, didn’t he”

Circe: “I roll to seduce Odysseus… 17!” DM: “Not bad! Odysseus, make a wisdom saving throw” Odysseus: “Nat 20, baby!!” DM: “Sorry, Circe, Odysseus really does just love his wife that much”

DM: “A siren appears, wearing Penelope’s face… Odysseus, make a wisdom saving throw” Odysseus: “Another nat 20 let’s gooo-" DM: “Okay so you can just sail on by-" Odysseus: “No no let me roll for persuasion, let’s have some fun with this”

Odysseus: “Please don’t tell me you’re about to do what I think you’ll do” DM: “Roll for persuasion” Odysseus: “…nat 1” DM: “your luck has run out. Eurylochus, steak time. Nom nom nom”

Eurylochus: “But we’ll die” DM: “Roll for persuasion” Eurylochus: “…nat 1” Odysseus: “I know” Eurylochus: “dude come ON-“ DM: *lightning noises*

Odysseus: “If you’re plan’s so great, then why’d you wait to say it?” DM: “Hermes, make a performance check” Hermes: “NAT 20 DARLING” DM: “This campaign is now a Hermes dance party. Ody, you’re fighting those sea monsters on your own while Hermes just tears it up in the corner”

Poseidon: “After everything you’ve done, how will you sleep at night?” Odysseus: “Next to my wife” Literally the entire party: “OHHHHHHHHHHH” DM: “THAT’S AN INSPIRATION POINT FOR YOU” *Cut to Odysseus beating every single suitor in the span of like an hour*

Part 2

....Huh?

HUH????

HUH?!?!?????????

I AM WEEPING

the funniest thing in the entire pirates of the caribbean series is definitely that one scene in At World’s End where they have parlay but davy jones is part of it, and rather than have him stand in the shallows or something they get a big bucket of water and have in stand on it on shore

who thought of that idea? who thought “put davy jones in a bucket of water” and had the guts to suggest it aloud? and then who went “hey that sounds like a great idea!”

at some point someone told davy jones their idea was for him to stand in a bucket of water and he agreed to it

Dalinar would fall asleep listening to the audiobook of The Way of Planes

Pros and Cons of Stormlight Characters in the Middle Seat Next to You on a Budget Airline.

As requested by anon. :)

1. Kaladin

Cons: His legs are so long. His hair is so luxurious. His shoulders are so broad. This large, beautiful man is not trying to be in your space, but the budget airline seat cannot contain him. Pros: You started what you thought was an idle conversation, but by the end of your flight, he had diagnosed your chronic pain and become your therapist??

2. Shallan

Pros: Well, she's more of a regular-sized human and she's friendly but quiet. She seems to just want to sketch the whole flight, so no complaints! Cons: Why does she keep staring directly at a space across the plane and sketching the creepiest symbol-headed creatures you've ever seen with her eyes vaguely glazed over like she doesn't even know she's doing it holy shit is this a Twilight Zone situation where there are invisible gremlin monsters on this plane that only she can see and is it your imagination or do you hear humming from somewhere

3. Adolin

Cons: Listen, this is a budget airline, and this guy seems to think it's a fancy spa?? He's got the slippers, the posh eye mask, the luxurious travel pillow, some really nice face creams, and he seems to be video chatting with a girl even though the internet on the plane doesn't even work. Frankly, you're jealous and grouchy about it. Pros: Okay, he actually seems really sweet and he gave you some of his way-too-nice-for-an-airplane snacks. You take it all back; this guy is awesome.

4. Szeth

Pros: He is so still. So quiet. Almost folded in on himself. Barely...breathing? Honestly, you keep forgetting the middle seat is occupied, and how rare is that! Cons: You just...you think you'd feel better if he just blinked. Just once. Please.

5. Lift

Cons: You had to sigh just a little when a little kid plopped down next to you. Also, she goes to the bathroom every five minutes, and comes back with food every time. You think she might be robbing people. Pros: She complimented your butt quite sincerely. You've always been kinda self-conscious about your butt! But apparently yours is the "second best she's ever seen." Feels nice.

6. Jasnah

Pros: Like, is it possible for someone to just be really good at flying? She came in, expertly stowed her luggage, sat down elegantly, did her seatbelt, used a wipe to clean up the tray table and surrounding area, and immediately starting reading some thick tome. Do you have a crush on her? You might have a crush on her. Cons: She glanced at the book you're reading, and you know she judged you for it.

7. Wit

Cons: Does this guy EVER stop talking? Pros: Okay, actually, you found him kind of annoying at first, but that story he told you about the temple and the duck might have healed years of trauma? Did you just realize that you don't have to forgive your mom and that's okay?

8. Renarin

Pros: He sat down and you were like, "Okay. Cute nerd. I dig it." Cons: You just wish he wouldn't scrawl foreboding-seeming numerals on the back of the airline chair in front of him. Is it counting down to...just before the plane lands? What does it mean???

9. Amarem

Cons: He came in and was IMMEDIATELY like, "I am taller than you and so I should have your seat." And then he just...waited? Like he thought you'd just comply??? Pros: He seems intent on pretending that never happened. Fine by you. That guy seems like an asshole.

10. Zahel

Pros: He falls asleep, like, immediately and doesn't stir for the entire flight. Cons: He's just kinda stinky.

11. Dalinar

Cons: He sits down and, unprompted, says something like, "In my youth I would always battle to occupy every armrest but now, after reading The Way of Planes, I have realized that it is the journey, not the armrests, that matter, so you can have them" and then you're like, "Dude, the person in the middle seat gets the armrests that's just common courtesy" and then he looks at you and you look at him and it's vaguely awkward the whole flight and nobody uses the armrests. Pros: Actually, after a while you do take the armrest and the tension goes down a lot.

12. Taravangian

Pros: He just kinda seems like a nice old man, you know? Kinda confused about stuff, but harmless enough. Cons: He falls asleep partway through and droops his head onto your shoulder and drools a bit and you know you sound ridiculous but it feels somehow calculated. Intentional. Evil.

13. Sebarial

Cons: The very second beverage service starts he's all, "Bring me a BOTTLE of wine" and you're like, "Oh no. It's one of those dudes who gets way too drunk on planes!" Pros: You know? This guy actually seems pretty jolly and chill. You catch yourself thinking, "I wish I could pretend he was my uncle." You're not sure where that came from.

14. Rock

Pros: He scoffs at the provided airline snacks and gets out this thermos and gives you the best damn soup you've ever had in your life. Cons: He's just a large, warm man. Very large. Very warm. Not his fault, of course, but now YOU are very warm.

15. Elhokar

Cons: Every time there is plane turbulence, he mutters something about how it's the assassins coming to finish the job. Poor dude must be really scared of flying. Pros: You feel a warm, parental feeling growing in you as you look at this sad, scared man. Maybe your mom was right. Maybe you WOULD be good with kids.

16. Eshonai

Pros: This lady is, just, SO excited to be traveling that it can't help but make YOU excited to travel. Like, you always thought plane travel sucked, especially budget airline travel, be she is so delighted by everything that you find yourself thinking, "You know, it IS pretty amazing that we're soaring through the sky right now traveling to a new land." Cons: Cons? No cons. You wish you could ALWAYS see flying through this woman's eyes.

for geto week 2022 day 4

prompts were: sacrifice / liminal spaces / psychological thriller / horror / "he simply wants to be dead. again."

kazoo as spiritual instrument

Rhaenyra: how could they possibly believe I had a hand in this monstrous act?

Daemon:

Thinkin about the symbolism in Pheonix viewing court like poker vs Edgeworth viewing court like chess and how it shows the difference between the defense side and the prosecution side.

Edgeworth views court as a chess match; in chess, both sides start on completely equal ground, with the same pieces on both sides, the only difference being the colors to differentiate who's who. The winner is the person with better tactics, who uses their pieces wisely, who makes less illogical moves.

Pheonix, on the other hand, sees court like poker, a card game in which the sides can never be equal, and you cannot be sure of who has the better hand, which gives way to bluffing and pretending you are doing well to persuade your opponent to back down, even if you have very little to go on. You have to weight logic vs chance, never knowing for certain that your opponent does not have a trump card on them. While being wise with your cards will get you far, luck is necessary to win.

This shows the difference between the prosecution and defense sides wonderfully, with the prosecution having all the access to the forensics, the witnesses, the crime scene, the privilege, while the defense has to catch up and do it all themselves, often in less time with less resources.

But even better, it shows why the prosecutors look down upon the defense's bluffing and conjecture, because if Edgeworth thinks this is like a chess game, then he assumes that the defense has equal information, not less information. Why do they need so much bluffing if all the pieces are the same, unless they are losing? Why do they act as though we have underhanded tricks when they use the smallest things to bring up? It is because on the defense's side, you know you have less intel than the prosecutors, you know your hand is worse, so you have to make everything count, because the only certainty you have is the trust in your defendant.