Eerm My Chosen Tags Are Fine, I Guess:

xie lian save me xie lian...my midterms...my assignments my grades...........

[ID in plain and alt text: digital art page of xie lian drawn 3 times. one the left is a full body drawing of him squatting down one arm propped on his knee, cheek resting on his hand. He is looking off into the distance with a sort of blank contemplative look. In the top right is a full body drawing in a chibi style. Xie lian is smiling at the camera, arms extended out on his sides. There is a small heart drawn next to him. On the bottom right is a half body drawing of him in the same chibi style. 3 butterflies flutter around him, one resting on his finger. He greets them with a flustered smile. End ID]

“Back in the eighties dungeons were becoming a thing in New York. Guys would pay a lot of money to come there and have some dominatrix tell them what to do. I was making leather pencil skirts for a lot of the doms, with holes in the back so that guys could kiss their ass. One day I was fitting a dom named Asia, and I told her: ‘I bet I could make more money than you without wearing stuff like this.’ She bet me I couldn’t. It was all a big goof. But then I started really thinking about it. Asia was making $150 a session, and that was real money. So I did the same thing I always do when I get an idea. I just ran an ad in the back of the Village Voice. Most of these girls were advertising how young they were. So I used the word ‘mature.’ And I figured out how to write ‘Jewish Guys Welcome’ in Yiddish, and I put that at the bottom. It was some of the easiest money I ever made. I never let them touch me. All I had to do was be a bossy black woman. And I could do that easy because my mother had been such a bitch. I’d pretend to be a school teacher, or a nanny. It was the dumbest shit. I just kept inventing crazy scenarios. And the crazier the scenario, the more money I made. One time I heard about a dom on the Upper East Side who charged $3,000 a week to kidnap a guy and lock him in her basement. I didn’t have a basement, but I knew a limo driver named Dean who liked to hustle like me. So every time I got a call from a new client, I’d say: ‘You want to be kidnapped, don’t you?’ And he’d start stuttering like: ‘Duh, duh, duh, duh.’ And I’d say: ‘Listen to me closely. Stand on the corner of 5th and 18th tomorrow at 3 pm. Don’t be late.’ Then I’d call Dean and tell him the plan. It was always easy to spot the guy. He’d be the one checking his watch and looking scared as shit. So we’d roll up in the limo, grab him by the collar, and pull him inside. Then I’d lock the doors and start telling him what to do. Everything went down in the back of the limo. Dean just rolled up the partition and kept his eyes on the road. At the end I’d give him $100, because I was getting $250 for that.”

-Happy 81st birthday to Stephanie 'Tanqueray' Johnson. If you see her wheeling around Chelsea today wish her a happy birthday, and there is a nonzero chance she will give you a glow-in-the-dark dildo eraser. -Humans of New York

I have no proof?!?!? (Promptly pulls up the last five years of text messages from you)

I do the opposite of gatekeeping, I’m not going to shut up until you like this thing as much as I do

Hi, I hope you're doing well. ❤️ I'm writing to you with full of hope to help me and my family. My family is in a very danger situation due to the ongoing war, and I've launched a GoFundMe campaign to save them. 😢 Could you please share my campaign post from my profile? Each share could be a lifeline for my family. 🙏 Feel free to share it in any other social media platform if you would like. Our campaign has been verified by operation olive branch, and is entry number 26 in their Master List on their spreadsheet. From the bottom of my heart I want to thank you in advance for all of your support and kindness.

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Emergency: Help Evacuate My Family From GAZA WAR

Dear Humanity, I'm Haya from Gaza , from a family of 8 people: my parents, two sons, and four daughters (two of them suffer from allergies)

Hi Haya,

I can absolutely share your campaign post from your profile! I am sorry for the delayed response.

I see you have about $2,300 left to raise before you reach your goal! I cannot contribute much, but I will share this GoFund me with my friends and family.

Please let me know if there is anything else I can do to help!

In community,

Feeling a lot of feelings about how Hadestown doesn't present the story as "Orpheus turned around and everything fell apart and there was nothing anyone could do to fix it" and instead presents a story that says "he turned around, he doubted, he failed, but if we keep telling his story maybe one day Orpheus won't" and it's not just about Orpheus as a single character, it's a bout every Orpheus, everyone who runs up against a system they can't change and fails and everyone who sees that failure and gets back up and says "maybe I can change it now" and tries again. That Orpheus failed isn't the takeaway of the story. The takeaway is that one day he might succeed.

dear mother and father, i hate this school. i want to go home. the most popular girl in school and the smart green girl have a really intense homoerotic rivalry and they keep roping all of us into their musical numbers. please. i was not made for dancing. i really just wanted to study history

tgcf au where everything is the exact same except HC loses his Cool Guy persona in front of XL and becomes a stuttering Mess

I’ve been a proud passenger on the Gelphie Express since I was in grade school!

So embarrassed to say this, but I listened to portions of the audiobook with my mom on the way to school. If you’ve read the book, you know, it’s DEFINITELY not a kids book!

what the FUCK do you MEAN they TITANTIC pose.

ive been laughing for 5 minutes they look so genuine and in the moment and they just had such an emotional scene of their "sisterhood", like yeah guys all friends intimately interlock fingers from behind

THERE WAS ROOM ON THAT BROOM!!!!!!