Was It Casual When You Shoved Him Off The Cliff And Then Stood Over His Corpse Watching The Warmth And

'im Henry !'

'im Camila !'

Cool well I'm Richard's ex-girlfriend he had to move to Hampton to get away from and he describes as a 'lowbrow, pop-psychology version of Sylvia Plath'

Hey guys! I'm just letting you all know that I won't be active that much today.

Me and a bunch of psychos on Tumblr are celebrating the death of some old Roman politician.

Dazai is cruel. Dazai is abusive. In some way Dazai haven't changed and won't change. Dazai is manipulative. Dazai is dangerous. Many of Dazai's actions are disgusting. His actions could be perceived as inhumane. But Dazai is a human being.

It's always about being human. In your own eyes. In the eyes of others.

Dazai doesn't consider himself non-human because of his cruel actions. It's nothing about his morals. After all, Dazai had dealt with so many cruel people. He knows evil is human. He thinks he's lacking something. Something that makes others move forward. A purpose in life. Isn't he just lost?

Dazai's character is portrayed as infallible but it's not truth. To make mistakes is the most human thing you can think of (next to peeing in the shower). His mistake is that he can't tell he already has meaning in his life: working for ADA, protecting his friends, protecting the world.

"Anything I would never want to lose is always lost. It is a given that everything that is worth wanting will be lost the moment I obtain it. There’s nothing worth pursuing at the cost of prolonging a life of suffering." – he's always ready to leave. Dazai tries not to get attached. He's always ready to lose everything. Doesn't it make him just a passive observer in his own life? From a manga reader's perspective, we know he has significance to the story but Dazai sees himself as nothing. He's able to catch the moment only when it's already a memory. Dazai may think of himself non-human because he only lives his life halfway. He plays chess – he moves the pieces but does not appear on the board.

So even if you're a genius, still you're nothing more than a sinfully stupid and cruel human being.

I miss you

- Clementine Von Radics

SO much about doing well is just not even giving your brain the time to sabotage you. Like deciding to just get started on a task before your brain could conjure up thoughts like “but there’s always tomorrow” “ruminate on this pointless thing instead” like sometimes you genuinely just have to put pen to paper and do

My small analysis about The Secret History, and the way it seems to fall in the absurdism:

Through the whole book, we have these little details, characters and else that break the classic (and very structured) rules of writing. In literature, it is known that every character and every interaction is forced to have a weight on the narrative, however, in the book we find characters that are there or things that happen just because. The person following Bunny and Henry on their trip, or the character that lied about seeing something the day of Bunny's murder.

Now, this is only in the way the book is structured, however, if we look closely, we find the perfect example of why this falls in the absurdism. You see, Camus was a firm believer that things don't have to happen for a reason, that nothing matters because at the end, we all are going to die, and that it doesn't matter what we do.

Henry (and I would say Camilla and maybe even Francis) follows this idea after the bacchanal. It is the result of the bacchanal.

The murder, which is a mere concept that fall in the category of terror by humans, is an act of destruction, one of the worst transgressions (if not considered the worse one). Death is only allowed if it happens because of some sort of destiny, divinity or deity, death is a transgression for humans, the thin line. When they murdered the farmer, they crossed this line, clearly, the main strenght in this, is Henry.

When he's the main responsable of this death, he crossed the line. And then, he got away with it. So, this bringed in him the idea that, actually, nothing matters. Nothing matters because he alredy killed someone, and nothing changed. He still got up, got to study, got to live as he wants.

He described that he often felt like life was meaningless and bland, but after killing someone, he noticed that life is actually meaningless, yet, this as well means he could do whatever he wished.

That's why he could kill Bunny, that's why he decided he wanted to be closer to Camilla, play around with poisoning. Henry realized that if life was empty on its own, he could do as he pleased, because there's nothing stopping him.

You don't have to force yourself to bounce back so quickly. I read something recently that said "when you come in from a rainstorm, you don't expect yourself to be dry and warm right away", and it really resonated with me. It's okay to take time to dry off and warm up. Take the time you need to process what happened to you.