Source

“I feel unspeakably lonely. And I feel - drained. It is a blank state of mind and soul I cannot describe to you as I think it would not make any difference. Also it is a very private feeling I have - that of melting into a perpetual nervous breakdown. I am often questioning myself what I further want to do, who I further wish to be; which parts of me, exactly, are still functioning properly. No answers, darling. At all.”

— Anne Sexton

Vogue US, September 1990.

Ph. Arthur Elgort

honestly bpd sucks because i’ll be showing up for ppl because i think they're worth it and i don't want them to leave me, but they don't show up for me, which implies im not worth it and losing me isn't worth the effort and it's so painful being the only one giving a fuck

bpd love is on a whole other level. intense as fuck. we love with every fiber of our being. we give our souls to strangers. we empty our heart out to help others. we pour from a cup that's empty. we always have more to give. it's why we're so easily taken advantage of

“That’s true and it’s unfair to laugh at the lead singer in the opera who sings an aria while lying on the stage, mortally wounded. We lie on the ground and sing for years.”

— Franz Kafka, Letters to Milena

““Don’t listen to yourself; listen to the advice that you give others.” - Michael Lottner”

—

“I would never tie you down, not even with garlands of roses. I don’t want anything from you that doesn’t come from your own impulse, like water from the springs.”

— Dulce María Loynaz, tr. James O’Connor, Absolute Solitude: Selected Poems; “XLVI”

bpd makes me love others the way i myself crave to be loved. entirely, blindly, obsessively, overall crazily.

this type of love is unsustainable but i've never been shown how to love healthily, and reasonable love from others never feels like enough.

i want to be here.

“My life is made up of ‘I’m sorry’. I feel like I have to apologize to people, to things, to life itself. It’s like, ‘I’m sorry to be here’. I don’t want to disturb anyone.”

— Yohji Yamamoto