Wings Of Fire

Help I just need somewhere to put my fanstay au thing that was inspired by a dream if I type it out on a doc I’ll try to actually make it look good

Cass run from the guards you stole something and ur funny

Oh no you slipped down a Sid spath root thingie tree right in front of a shop

Oh no the guards a catching up

Cass run inside the store now there’s a hot person also more valuable things that are actually kinda trash

I keep dreaming of 1942 French guns what does this mean for me

Cass it’s actually a bookstore with a bunch of random shit in the corner. Steal it. Oh fuck you got attached and you kicked the owners out. Oh you let them back in but it’s your place now. Cass I doubt your ethics more and more I swear you were NOT this fucked up when I dreamt you

Turns out the bookstore had something to do with a nature reserve and ppl are trying to fuck that up. Beat their ass nature needs your arsonistic ways

Oh the hot Demi girl wants to do gender fuckery with you. That’s hot. hi Sandra yeah sure I’ll participate in gender fuckery with you *finger guns*

There are four types of fish scales!

Cycloid scales are thin, overlap, and flexible. They're found on primitive teleosts (like minnows and carp).

Ctenoid scales have small, backwards pointed scales (known as cterns) make the fish more hydrodynamic and faster. They're found on Advanced Ctenoids (like perch and sunfish).

Ganoid scales are thick, diamond-shaped, and mostly non-overlapping. They're found on Chondrostei (like sturgeons and paddlefish).

Placoid scales are spikey and tooth-like with nerves. These are found on Chondrichthyes (like sharks and rays).

Ichthyology Notes 3/?

I listen to a lot of audiobook murder mysteries, which has me thinking:

Shen Yuan transmigrating into a murder mystery… as the killer!

There are a couple of ways the story could go.

First Option: Shen Yuan lets his System know, in no uncertain terms, he will not be murdering anyone.

Its response: [Alternate Plotline Initiated. New Assignment: Designated Red Herring].

Poor Shen Qingqiu finds himself stuck in a whole murder mystery series, and any time anyone is murdered, he somehow ends up being the number one suspect!

The victim? Probably picked a fight with Shen Qingqiu at some point. (Shen Qingqiu tries to avoid such arguments, but it never seems to work!)

The murder weapon? Yeah, Shen Qingqiu is almost guaranteed to have touched it at some point. (Shen Qingqiu is severely tempted to start wearing gloves 24/7.)

The body? Either Shen Qingqiu finds it himself at some inopportune time, and/or it was stashed somewhere “only” he is supposed to have access to. (At some point it's just: Shen Qingqiu opens a door… sees a body… closes the door. “Time to call the cops, yet again.”)

Shen Qingqiu ends up a tad paranoid about the whole thing, setting up cameras outside his house, in his office, in his car, etc. just to (hopefully) stop people from planting evidence any of those places.

If anyone asks about the truly absurd number of (eventually dropped) murder allegations, Shen Qingqiu insists he's cursed. Even with genre blinders on (making the number of convoluted murders in the area seem normal somehow), it's hard for anyone to argue the point.

For Shen Qingqiu's day job (when he's not busy being charged with murder) he works as a professor at a university with a highly regarded Criminology & Criminal Justice program. I'm thinking the original goods was a literature professor, with a strong distaste for cops, who was known for grading anyone in the criminal justice program exceedingly harshly. Naturally one of his students is the protagonist, Luo Binghe.

After his transmigration, professor Shen Qingqiu suddenly becomes a very kind and doting professor with a real passion for literature. This leaves Luo Binghe quickly smitten and makes him a very motivated amateur detective, since he's determined to prove his beloved's innocence as quickly as possible and as often as needed!

Second Option: Shen Yuan takes over after the original goods already committed the murder.

He wakes up with a splitting headache (the victim attempted to defend themselves presumably), looks at his bloody hands… looks at the victim… looks at the weapon… looks at his bloody hands again. “Damn it, Airplane.”

He decides he doesn't want to try and hide a body actually, just to be caught by the protagonist later and charged with a whole slew of things in addition to murder, so he calls the cops himself. He might as well take advantage of the fact he has a concussion and literally doesn't remember a thing. Maybe he can get the charges reduced somewhat and get a lighter sentence.

Of course the first cop that arrives at the scene is Yue Qingyuan, who as the #1 Xiao-Jiu stan gives Shen Qingqiu way too much benefit of the doubt. The most obvious evidence also keeps being erased or damaged by weird as hell coincidences.

Shen Qingqiu knows he certainly isn't responsible for damaging evidence and wonders if the System is working overtime behind the scenes to ensure there actually is a mystery for Luo Binghe to solve. (After all, it wouldn't be much of a story if Shen Qingqiu was already charged and sentenced before Luo Binghe had a chance to even do anything.)

To his complete bewilderment, after a few days leave to recover from the concussion, Shen Qingqiu is actually allowed to return to his university teaching job. He decides to make the best of it, since who knows how long he'll be a free man.

As in the first scenario, a few months later and Luo Binghe is absolutely smitten, not to mention all the other students and faculty that have come to adore him.

As Shen Qingqiu has successfully endeared himself to pretty much anyone and everyone local that could actually charge him or provide eyewitness testimony, not to mention all shady shit about murder victim Qiu Jianluo the ongoing investigation keep digging up, the plot stalls for a bit until the state police (aka Huan Hua Palace) are finally called in by Qiu Haitang.

Unfortunately for the ‘HHP’ folks, the protagonist himself is on Shen Qingqiu's side, and Luo Binghe is perfectly happy to muddy the waters by conveniently “losing” evidence, sending them after every single red herring he comes across, and “accidentally” digging up dirt on all the shady dealings going on in their department.

The System keeps trying to motivate Shen Qingqiu to hide evidence, lie, or do literally anything suspicious to progress the plot further, but all its punishment protocols involve sabotaging Shen Qingqiu's coverup attempts (of which he has none) or revealing information to the protagonist (who is complicit by this point) so it's fresh out of luck.

Eventually the System gives up and Shen Qingqiu is congratulated for “getting away with murder!” despite the fact he didn't actually do anything.

“Seriously? Does it even count as getting away with murder when the original goods was the actual murderer? I didn't kill anyone!”

[...]

Luo Binghe doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

how much more terrible(irresistible) would shizun be as a woman

lesbingqiu or whatever floats your boat I need fem Shizun like I need air

You're so real for this.. shen yuan would drive women absolutely insane because you know how oblivious shizun is... now imagine that amped up to a hundred because women are more friendly with each other

Instead of saying a bunch of gay shit in his head and then acting aloof, fem Yuan would be going "your hair is so beautiful, what products do you use?" while she runs her fingers through Liu qingge's hair (Liu qingge uses 3 in 1 and is breezing on good genes. Disgusting.)

She'd be so much more touchy. She'd straddle Binghe’s lap to do her makeup. She'd have sleep overs with Shang qinghua and share the bed. She'd say she's so jealous of Liu qingge's muscles as she feels them up. Dear God, her comp het would be strong enough to take down nations.

There's a lesbingqiu wip I have on the back burner where shen yuan and binghe go shopping together and shen yuan is like "Don't be silly, we're both girls!" And pulls binghe into the changing room with her. Binghe's hand sweating and shaking as shen yuan lifts her hair up and looks over her shoulder back at binghe behind her and says "help me unzip my dress?" Binghe pulling the zipper down slowly, revealing shen yuan's bare back inch by inch. Binghes almost unzipped the dress the entire way before she realizes she hasn't seen yuan-jie's bra band yet because she's not wearing a bra. Shen Yuan kicking off her dress with her back to binghe wearing nothing but lacy panties and she still. doesn't. notice binghe half dying over this.

Anyway heres one last scene from the lesbingqiu fic to really drive home how insane fem shen yuan would be as a woman:

Slowly indoctrinating my friends into svsss one at a time

Fr I just timed it and I was watching that for like 2:00

It shows 2:00:72 but that’s partially unreliable bc it took me like at least 42 of the 72 to get out the app, plus the time that it took me to stop it.

the time for games is over

Followers: kill

Advanced Rock Paper Scissors.

Original comic post

SMBC ◆ PATREON ◆ INSTAGRAM ◆ TWITTER ◆ STORE

new reaction image

Me and my friends are going to start a new campaign and we’re making rumors

Imma say that I go to the warm red pavilion (but it’s actually to sleep)

I know most people don't care about anything unless it has to do with the U.S. but can we please start talking about the Canadian election.

Please don't vote for Poilievre. He's basically the Canadian Trump and plans to put in place laws that harm trans youth, and lots of other shit.

Please vote istg this is the only way anything will get better. Poilievre has been kissing millionaires and billionaires asses. He'll make life even harder, and he loves Trump.

Reblogs are appreciated, especially if you aren't Canadian.