Mhm, So When I Tell My Lawyer About This Little Post, What Will Your Defense Be?

..might delete this later idk. Seems kinda rushed to me but I had the idea so I gotta get it out🤷🏾‍♀️

Imagining Price and Nik lying on the floor of Nik’s bird and sharing a cigarette during a mission gone to hell.

The team’s dead. First it was Johnny who took a bullet to the temple, and then Ghost and Gaz followed soon after. Price can still recall the sergeant’s dull brown eyes staring at him across the field, and he wishes to burn that memory out of his mind forever. Luckily for him, forever seemed to be right around the corner as a grenade went off just a few inches away from their “hideout”, rattling it a bit and fucking up the tail’s blades.

As bullets cracked at the windows and bounced off the interior, Price looks over at Nik and passes him the cigarette, to which the Russian gingerly plucks it from his hand and takes a long drag, eyes closing for a split second before opening again as he passed off the dwindling cancer stick back to the Captain.

“I’m sorry.” John says after a long beat of silence, not daring at glance in Nik’s direction as the man looked over at him. “Just thought you should know that.”

Nik eyes John for a bit before looking back up at the crumbling roof of his helicopter.

“I do.” He mutters. “Yet I do not know what for.”

John huffs a humorless chuckle and finishes the cigarette before stamping out the butt and flicking it away. “Course’ you don’t.”

The two lay there for a good few minutes after, unspoken words passing between them as the gunfire continues. Suddenly, a grenade is tossed into the broken window of the helicopter and the two look at it before looking at each other.

“Johnathan.” Nik muttered, grasping his hand tightly as he stared into those bright blue eyes. “We will meet again. I will find you, and we will be happy.”

John just stared at Nik helplessly before nodding, a small smile gracing his lips as he held Nik’s hand tighter. “Oka-”

In a flash, the bird erupted into flames and smoke, chunks of metals and bodies and papers flying everywhere until all that was left was the burning aftermath.

The weekend is upon me and suddenly all my depressive thoughts are being replaced by ones of clarity and happiness.

Hallelujah, thank you Jesus.

Remember seeing that in class once(as well as the autopsy), and goodness gracious it was something.

If someone can find a blamy with just as much fire power then us Americans might actually be able to recreate it without it being a hoax or an organized accident.

Did you see that Elon Musk did a Nazi salute TWICE durning trumps inauguration??!?!!,! Yeah, I’m only fuming a little. Totally unrelated, how would literally any character kill a man? Violence is on the table.

(For legal reasons, this is not me looking for ways to kill Elon Musk. This is me being angry :) )

Oh, I fucking saw. That Nazi, built like a deep breath looking motherfucker.

God, do you remember Dallas, November 22nd 1963?

Fine weather that day, I think Musk should go and I trust America to recreate the exact circumstances that took place that day.

Someone tries to grope Price at a military ball he and his husband Nik are attending and the huge Russian pilot comes off his rocker and knocks the offending guy clean out.

(John gratefully thanks him later by laying back on their hotel bed and taking all of Nik)

Uhhhh John grabbing at Nik’s full hairy man tits while riding him uhmmmm and moaning like he owns them hmmmm Nik groping at John’s fat ass urmmmmmmm and grinning because he does own it uhhhhhhh..

I think that Nik may have a TOUCH of eczema on his body. Maybe on the backs of his hands or in the crook of his arms and neck.

Either way, it’s a pain in the ass when Summer and Winter roll around and he runs out of his medicated cream because his skin gets all dry and cracks or it flares and he ends up with gashes in those areas from scratching it so much.

Luckily for him, John is always there to help!

He’ll make sure he always has his cream when he can, and if he starts to scratch at those areas he’ll move his hand and rub gently at the spot to soothe it. If Nik manages to scratch a gash however, he’ll run it under cold or warm water. (Nik likes scolding hot water but knows that the other two options are best for him.)

I feel like Nik’s music taste is everywhere.

If you asked him who his favorite artist was, he’d give you a whole scroll that could reach the ends of the Earth and then some.

If you said he could only pick one, he’d give you the most disgusted look a peaceful man like himself could muster and turn his nose up at you simply because,— who has just one favorite music artist?

If he ever met that person, he’d make them listen to all the music artists the world has to offer until they apologized and saw reason.

I think that Price has an unhealthy addiction to any sorting or organizing game.

When he first got a phone he didn’t really use it much because— what’s it good for except making calls and texting when needed, or reading the weather? But when he sees an ad for a game called Nuts Sort.. it was over from there.

Nik didn’t really mind when he saw his husband first playing it. In fact, he was happy that John was using his phone for something other than mundanity. But when he begins to play it in the middle of sleepless nights or when Nik’s trying to serenade him, the Russian begins to grow irritated because now that “stupid granny game”(as he’d call it) was taking up his love’s time and attention.

So.. if the game so happens to disappear from his phone the next day and Nik fucks him feverishly over their dresser to help him forget about the game forever then.. ah, who gives a shit right?

LOL WHAT?? TS GOT ME DEAD🤣🤣

John, who snuck out to the patch of forest behind base to smoke a cig and take a swing of the Guinness he was not supposed to have, seeing how he had just gotten discharged.

Nikolai, who was hiding out behind a tree, with the sole express purpose of making sure a certain John Price doesn't sign his life (and liver) away so close to his retirement.

Laswell who was in the forest to video call with her wife, because she can't do it in base. (Least the rest of 141 starts calling her wife their other mother)

John stumbles over his footsteps, half drunk, causing Laswell to throw a rock in John's direction. Nikolai ends up tackling Laswell to the ground.

They both watched as John tripped over the rock Laswell threw, face planted himself on the floor and promptly started snoring.

The video Laswell had on file contains the maniacal laughter of Laswell as Nikolai grows red and stands up, tending to his very passed out husband instead.

What if one day Nik is helping John with his garden out back and it gets really hot so he ties up his hair into a man bun before lifting two heavy bags of soil, one under his arm and the other over his shoulder.

John sees this and drags that man back inside for a few minutes before they come back out to finish planting the Marigold seeds.