Morgan-owo - Morgan Talking Randomly

wait what

I can't unsee it. General Targg is a honey badger.

lotr/the hobbit incorrect quotes

part 6? is it six? might be six. i kinda forgot i left it in wips, sry

Gandalf: we need a plan

Gandalf: *points at Merry and Pippin* no explosions

Gandalf: *points at Gimli* no cursing towards elves

Gandalf: *points at Legolas* absolutely no using a shield as a fucking snowboard

Gandalf: *points at Aragorn* preferably no falling down the cliff

Gandalf: *points at Boromir* you just better be happy to still be there so stay quiet in the back, will you?

Gandalf: *points at Sam and Frodo* and we don’t sacrifice ourselves!

Gandalf: you know what, I will do the planning

— — — — —

Boromir, having no idea about geography of Middle-Earth past Rohan: so… you live in Mirkwood?

Legolas: so first of all, my father lives in Mirkwood

Legolas: I tend to live in the moment

— — — — —

Gandalf: so, what was your plan precisely?

Aragorn: Pretty much save everyone and come home unharmed?

Gandalf: plan, Aragorn, p l a n, not a fucking wishlist!

— — — — —

Just some random cook at Edoras: any allergies?

Éowyn: weak-willed men and cowards!

Éomer: and hazelnuts. she’s allergic to hazelnuts.

— — — — —

Boromir: as your adoptive older brother I will absolutely not allow you to do this stupid, immature thing…

Merry & Pippin: :((

Boromir: …alone

Boromir: and we don’t tell Faramir until we need to be bailed out of citadel’s jail

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you're welcome

why are all these modern aus for the Odyssey set in a high school. where's the retelling where Odysseus is just a guy lost in an airport who keeps missing his connecting flights home due to a comical series of delays and disgruntled airline employees

what if chat are shapeshifters, so every time we get sent on a raid we morph into another creature

[bombasticbunnyy on all platforms]

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