One Of The Best Things About Neil Josten Is Honestly How Painfully Self-aware He Is. He’ll Be Running

no.2 the fivesome??

ok i can't and won't explain why it took me so long to write another one but i'm back !!

So... the whole five way thing that the gang had was. a lot. honestly reading was fine until you realised that everyone had slept with each other at some point other than richard and he was on his was there with francis anyways. my thoughts on this are all over the place but i just. i need it in plain english.

So Richard was in love with Camilla, and attracted to Henry and Charles, and almost slept with Francis. Camilla was in love with Henry, who loved her back. Charles and Camilla slept together and Charles was an abusive dickwad to her. He was probably in love with Camilla too. Francis and charles slept together on occasion and Francis was in love with Charles. I feel like there's more but. whatever.

wow. my thoughts are why was everyone so horny. literally you could've slept with Anyone Else. but nooooo we study ancient greek we're too good for everyone else. they're not built different they're built wrong. they took groupcest to another level.

i mean like,,, they were all college students so you can't judge them too hard because they were all on mood altering substances 99% of the time, so at that point they probably didn't have many brain cells left. Honestly richard shouldve just bit the bullet and gotten with Francis or something to put them both out of their collective miseries.

i'm embarrassed for them tbh. and just to point out that Richard being bi asf is a genuine (problem?) thing that female writers do with unreliable male narrators who are supposed to be straight. which i find like. so funny because it goes totally over my head the first time i read books, because im bisexual too so it's normal to me. but then going back and realising its some cishet white guy narrating and its a little suspicious?

obvious it's usually because the author is a cishet white woman who projects her attraction to men onto her characters. another notable example of this is Harry Potter. so this isn't like an isolated incident it's a thing that happens. the same way that men can tend to write women 2-dimensional, women tend to write as men bisexual. on accident? it's all very interesting to me.

the actual funniest shit. an ideal world where aaron wasn't homophobic

What if Andrew bans everyone from calling Neil his boyfriend & Aaron just goes overboard to spite him calling Neil his "loverboy", "groupie", "squeeze", "side piece", "exclusive boy toy" etc

One day Aaron introduces Neil as "Andrew's love muffin" and the ban is officially off. 😆

why did you have to. call it an aquarium.

Never would've thought I'd be so emotionally invested in a bunch of problematicaly coded characters playing violent lacross in an aquarium.

Neil as a conversation i had with my friends

Andrew, amused: and where does the pope live?

Neil immediately: Venice.

Aaron wheezing: Fucking WHAT?

Neil: No no wait... the VatiCAN

Kevin, visibly distraught: Neil... can you not pronounce the Vatican??

Neil: ....sure.

when neil was going to save andrew at the hemmick's house, he knew exactly what kind of wood the door was, and how easy it would be to break through. that's what kind of guy he is. neil doesn't win fights, but he is damn good at a getaway. this is a really good example about how all of neil's knowledge is really selective because of his upbringing. we need more survivalist neil because he shows all these traits in the books, another example is when he hitchhiked from columbia to palmetto. please stop ignoring this because i want to see batshit insane neil on the run fics right now thx

it's them !!

“Fight because you don’t know how to die quietly. Win because you don’t know how to lose. The king’s ruled long enough— it’s time to tear his castle down.” — The King’s Men by Nora Sakavic

rising from my grave to bring you this in light of recent developments

FEM HANNIGRAM HOW ARE WE FEELING

This is my first attempt at drawing their wlw version (something I wanted to do since I was 15 😭). THIS WAS SO FUN TO DO, I'm kinda obsessed with the concept ngl, i want to draw more of them like this

GAY RIGHTS !!!

Source

Let’s go!

i literally DIED when that girl was trying to get his number. girllll you dodged the biggest fucking bullet. that bullet being one andrew minyard, the butcher of baltimore and the moriyama crime family

hc that one day the upperclassmen bring up neil/marissa Incident while andrew is in hearing distance. the whole story is retold, complete with reenactments and typical fox dramatics as they howl at neil’s reaction to this poor girl just trying to get his number. 

importantly, this is the first and only time the other foxes see two things from andrew: ONE (1). how close he is to laughing at the absurdity of the entire story, of marissa being so silly, of neil being obtuse as a goose (but that’s ANDREW’S obtuse goose, tyvm), and generally the concept of neil not comprehending someone’s advances and TWO (2). how close he is to expressing real regret… regret that he wasn’t there in person to witness this glorious moment, of seeing someone else suffer from neil’s utter lack of awareness that andrew thought only he had to endure, of not seeing neil’s face and hearing his voice as he told marissa ‘i wouldn’t call you’. the ONLY time the upperclassmen see andrew that close to these emotions he claims not to feel.