'but-but Bsdm And Violent Sex Doesn't Affect Anybody!' Yes It Does. Now Girls Who Want To Be Seen As

by michelerossettiphotography

I'm going to have to read that, thanks so much for the rec!

It's another one of those things where, once you see it, it's everywhere in patriarchy.

The greatest trick of the patriarchy was to teach countless generations of women to be kind.

We can talk about statistics all day long, but the weaponisation of our compassion is what keeps us on our knees.

When we see studies about violence, the immediate reaction is but men can be victims, too, and examples like that are why the false ideas of the patriarchy hurts men, too and feminism is for everybody are so prevalent. Women have been so broken down by generations upon generations of manipulation through be kind that is feels wrong, that it feels psychologically painful to centre ourselves.

Instead of women being able to come together and fight for our rights as one, this malicious forced compassion makes us sideline and silence ourselves, with the reward being tricked into feeling like I'm a good and selfless person. When women dare to centre ourselves and put ourselves first reasonably, then we're gaslit into believing that we're being selfish, cruel and even violent, and when other women snap and snarl, tired of our treatment, then they're entirely dismissed as being any modern version of hysteric.

Men like to hide behind the idea that we're the manipulative ones that psychologically damage, but without a thousand generations of men reinforcing that we should think again and actually have kindness and compassion for others, women as a whole would be able to see through the blinders of oppression.

After all, to be anti-prostitution has been reframed as hating sex workers.

Fighting against systemic violence and rape against women is ignoring male victims and supporting female perpetrators.

Protecting female-only spaces is excluding a vulnerable minority's right to exist.

Few ordinary women want to be made to feel like they're hateful or cruel. As soon as we talk about women's issues, examples of individual men are brought up, and women are tricked into talking about them by either proving how kind we are ("of course I don't want anyone to be raped, male victims deserve help!") to distract us from our issues and re-centre men again, or women dismiss that obviously malicious call for compassion ("feminism isn't about men, sort your own issues out!") and then men use it as a reason as to why feminism is evil, because anything without kindness and compassion is wrong.

Women need to be taught that it's not unkind to put ourselves first, and that men use our compassion against us.

In feminism, our kindness and compassion must be reserved for our fellow women.

Women can be kind and compassionate to men in their private lives if they want, but that isn't part of feminism - and they need to be reminded that they won't get that kindness and compassion returned.

The greatest trick of the patriarchy was to teach countless generations of women to be kind.

We can talk about statistics all day long, but the weaponisation of our compassion is what keeps us on our knees.

When we see studies about violence, the immediate reaction is but men can be victims, too, and examples like that are why the false ideas of the patriarchy hurts men, too and feminism is for everybody are so prevalent. Women have been so broken down by generations upon generations of manipulation through be kind that is feels wrong, that it feels psychologically painful to centre ourselves.

Instead of women being able to come together and fight for our rights as one, this malicious forced compassion makes us sideline and silence ourselves, with the reward being tricked into feeling like I'm a good and selfless person. When women dare to centre ourselves and put ourselves first reasonably, then we're gaslit into believing that we're being selfish, cruel and even violent, and when other women snap and snarl, tired of our treatment, then they're entirely dismissed as being any modern version of hysteric.

Men like to hide behind the idea that we're the manipulative ones that psychologically damage, but without a thousand generations of men reinforcing that we should think again and actually have kindness and compassion for others, women as a whole would be able to see through the blinders of oppression.

After all, to be anti-prostitution has been reframed as hating sex workers.

Fighting against systemic violence and rape against women is ignoring male victims and supporting female perpetrators.

Protecting female-only spaces is excluding a vulnerable minority's right to exist.

Few ordinary women want to be made to feel like they're hateful or cruel. As soon as we talk about women's issues, examples of individual men are brought up, and women are tricked into talking about them by either proving how kind we are ("of course I don't want anyone to be raped, male victims deserve help!") to distract us from our issues and re-centre men again, or women dismiss that obviously malicious call for compassion ("feminism isn't about men, sort your own issues out!") and then men use it as a reason as to why feminism is evil, because anything without kindness and compassion is wrong.

Women need to be taught that it's not unkind to put ourselves first, and that men use our compassion against us.

In feminism, our kindness and compassion must be reserved for our fellow women.

Women can be kind and compassionate to men in their private lives if they want, but that isn't part of feminism - and they need to be reminded that they won't get that kindness and compassion returned.

that post is really upsetting me.

i loved my wife when she was identifying as trans, and i also love her now that she isn’t. some of my closest friends are butch lesbians who went through with some degree of medical transition and then made the choice to pull back for various reasons. they detransitioned and every single one of them is still gender non conforming and still cares deeply about their trans friends.

the idea that all detrans women are reactionary grifters is so misogynistic, homophobic, and insidious. yet another way the trans movement ostracizes ftm people and silences their voices. by fucking villainizing them. all while refusing to hold any mtf abuser or grifter accountable. unreal.

and the messages my wife and my detrans friends on here have to deal with every week … people fetishizing their detransition, speculating “you’re probably balding now” (because the worst thing a woman can be is ugly, of course), telling them “you’ll go back” and saying “death before detransition”. it hurts me so bad to see lesbian women being treated like criminals for the “crime” of trying to cope with their sexuality and their dysphoria in a lesbophobic society. why is it impossible to show these women empathy? they’re not the fucking enemy! remember who the real enemy is!

The beautiful remains of some stained glass in the old church burned down during the world war in coventry...

There's been tension between women of different sexualities in feminism from the beginning.

As a bisexual woman, over the years it's made me feel that there's more suspicion of us in feminism because there's this strange belief that bisexuals can turn off part of our sexuality if we want to (which we can't), so if we don't do that then we're traitors or fetishists or something else damaging or harmful, but if we're perceived as being able to turn off part of our sexuality (which again, we aren't), then we're treated with suspicion because what if we decide to turn it back on and betray everyone.

I'm too old and too tired to jump through hoops and beg other women who are supposed to be equally supportive of me and others like me please, please, I'm one of the good bis, I promise! I'll help tear down those evil bi women to prove I'm good! I won't say a thing if there's biphobia, aren't I a good girl?!

The patriarchy already demands enough out of women, and biphobia already damaged me enough when I was younger, I'm not carrying that burden too.

Plank, markers, acrylics, plants... And dragon. d:

My “all rich people are bad” brother would lose his fucking mind if I said “All men, including you”.

“Errr I don’t exploit you”, oh but when I had to walk to school in a dense black abaya and long hijab under the sweltering heat and you walked alongside me in your loose dress shirt, your privileged ass never showed any meaningful sympathy?

When you got to play sports outside all day but we girls couldn’t because of our restrictive wear and fear of male discrimination and sexual harassment, was it not your privileged ass that didn’t mind?

When we went to the beach and or swimming pools, it wasn’t you that only wore shorts swimming comfortably while I was covered head to toe in my burkini, still being leered at by the creep across the pool so I couldn’t even enjoy myself?

When our male cousin lived with us during the summer, was it not us girls that had to dress modestly and ‘behave’ in our own fucking homes while you played video games shirtless?

When our baby brother was growing up, was it not you that never changed his diaper once in your fucking life despite us being only a year apart in age?

When you started studying Islam just like me, was it not you that accused me of being blasphemous when I brought up concerns about sexism?

You saw obvious discrimination, you experienced privileges and benefitted, and you never once helped. I don’t care that you were ‘nice’ to me and joked around with me and hung out with me sometimes— the structure of inequality that you never cared to address is clear in my mind.

All men, INCLUDING YOU.

you know threating violence against women is still misogyny? right? even when it's against women you hate? you know when you say shit like "i wanna drag terfs out of the bathroom by the hair and curb stomp them" or "i hope republican women get raped and/or have an unwanted pregnancy so they can face the consequences of their actions" you're threating violence against specifically against women? and that's misogyny? you know that right?? right?? right??????