beating breath of the wild in under 40 minutes is an incredible feat and also fucking excellent in the context of the game. ganon spends 100 fucking years preparing this onslaught, building energy, getting ready to tear the world apart, and one elf twink wakes up butt-ass naked in a cave and legs it to the castle and kicks ganon’s ass apart in under an hour with a sword he found along the way
When you are alone and have a heart attack. What are you gonna do then?
Take a 2 minute break and read this:
Let's say it's 5:25 pm and you're driving home after an unusually hard day's work.
You are really tired and frustrated. All of a sudden your chest pains. They are starting to radiate in the arm and jaw. It feels like being stabbed in the chest and heart. You're only a few miles away from the nearest hospital or home.
Unfortunately you don't know if you can make it..
Maybe you've taken CPR training, but the person running the course hasn't told you how to help yourself.
How do you survive a heart attack when you're alone when it happens? A person who is feeling weak and whose heart is beating hard has only about 10 seconds before losing consciousness.
1. But you can help yourself by coughing repeatedly and very strongly! Deep breaths before every cough. Coughing should be repeated every second until you arrive at the hospital or until your heart starts to beat normally.
2. Deep breathing gives oxygen to your lungs and coughing movements boost the heart and blood circulation. Heart pressure also helps to restore a normal heartbeat. Here's how cardiac arrest victims can make it to the hospital for the right treatment
3. Cardiologists say if someone gets this message and passes it on to 10 people, we can expect to save at least one life.
4. FOR WOMEN: You should know that women have additional and different symptoms. Rarely have crushing chest pain or pain in the arms. Often have indigestion and tightness across the back at the bra line plus sudden fatigue.
You think they are what happens when you ALMOST but not quite A Ghost(tm)? Like, you have the ectoplasm and the will to continue... but you didn't really have A Thing in life? No Final Crystalizing Thought that brings focus? Just "ow! Ah! I'm scared. Don't wanna die!" And theeeeen.... *poof!*
Why am I Orb? Am squish? No bones.
Like? Remove any one piece of the Critical Formula and you get Blob instead of Ghost? Different KINDS, mind you, but blobs none the less.
Like Skulker! Not enough Ectoplasm. Ended up Blob. He CLEARLY had the Will, the Obsession, the gory end and unfinished business... buuuut? No green goo to power the creation of a full body. He clearly knows what he's supposed to LOOK like? But it's not something FIXABLE? Even with his now unlimited access to Ectoplasm.
Like in utero damage that permanently stunted his growth. HE is fine. All his facilities are on-line and checking in as they should, for the level of sentience expected of a ghost of his people. He just... smol. Same strength, intelligence, and power as he would have always HAD...
He just got handed a really, REALLY crap "customize your eternal meatsuit" option screen. Like for real guys. Basicly NO options. His salt is eternal and entirely justified. He could have had his tattoos. He paid a LOT of credits for those! Sat for DAYS! Had to track down this One(1) artist on this SHITTY little trading hub, that BARELY QUALIFIED as one, to sit in on uncomfortable overturned crate... IN A GAS MASK because the AIR SUPPORT KEPT KICKING IT... for hoooours!
It was a WORK OF ART. You would have CRIED.
This is BULLSHIT.
But wait, I hear you say, staring at the Blob ghost chewing on a lamp post. The one that has wii music playing behind the eyes. No thoughts, head jello, one might say. What about THEM?
LOT of Ecto! But THAT... might be either an animal or a fungus. We'd have to check. ANYTHING can and DOES die. If it's alive? It can die and potentially leave a ghost. But! Consider the noble Ghost Rabbit! *holds up squirming rabbit that is ABSOLUTELY trying to both bite me and kick me in the face* A noble and friendly creature!
THIS is what happens when an animal: has sufficient Ectoplasm at the death site, a reason to continue living (fairly common. It's usually their offspring, escape, the instinctual drive to survive itself or other understandable base drives. Like love, loyalty, or hunger.), and that all important High Emotions End.
Miss any of these? You get Blobbertson over there! He's clearly a hungry boy! But! Not very DRIVEN is he? Just floating along, chewing on whatever seems interesting, looking for a snack. He's food motivated. But not MOTIVATED motivated.
Blobbertson over there? A peaceful death. Too much Ectoplasm too leave, too food motivated in life NOT to carry over, but? No DRIVE. To DEFINE and DEMAND the Ectoplasm in his little body become sharp and active. No highly emotional state to stir it into action.
Is Blobbertson INCAPABLE of higher emotions? No. He is every bit as capable as the Ghost Rabbit that has savaged my hands and escaped while you were reading. It was, in fact, NOT as friendly as originally assumed. I may be bleeding. Unimportant. Blobbertson is PERFECTLY capable of getting attached. Being trained.
Whatever level of intelligence Blobbertson had in life, still remains. And WITH that? Comes the ability to improve and grow in death! IF (and this is the big one) he ever finds MOTIVATION to do so.
Because you see, Blobbertson is quite happy. No thoughts, brain jello. Drifting along in a happy green ocean like a jellyfish. Only concerned about his next snack. It's comforting. His food obsession filled, his tiny motivation barely enough to move him place to place.
He would GLADLY sit in one place and eat for the rest of eternity. Head blissfully silent.
And that's OKAY! It truly, honestly, is. Not everyone has to be conquers and kings, crafters and cosmonauts. Sometimes you just want to spend the rest of time playing in the sand. Resting on a sunshine-y hill. Not EVERY soul is a loud one.
And there are places like Amity Park out there. THICK as cold honey with Ectoplasm in the air, gently infusing all the life that grows there with greater and greater chance of Ghost-hood. Even the peaceful blinking awake after that final rest to look down and... little nubby green paws.
Congratulations on becoming a Blob, grandma! Yes, I imagine you ARE furious it is inordinately difficult to knit like this. No, I don't think complaining to the king will help, MeMa.
That said? I can not tell you if Blob Ghost all belong to the same Family or the same Order, but they are NOT the same species! The WAY in which you fuck up that ever vital Fomula results in WILDLY different Blobs! Was it an animal? A sentient species? A sentient PLANET? A complexe interlocking colony of fungi? What was the EXACT Ectoplasm concentration at the death site? Was that the historical levels or the At Death levels? Was the individual under sedation?
And you think it ends THERE? HA! The SKIES are FILLED with Fighty Mother Fuckers! Ghosts LOVE to fight! It's built into their social dynamics and hierarchy! Good ol brawls to get the Ecto pumping!
......Local Blob Farmer would like to take this moment to say "GET OF HIS GHOST PEONIES, YOU HEATHENS."
No they would NOT like to join your 24/7 thunder dome in the sky, THANKS! Martha here is trying to compose some Atlantian Shell Poetry. Blobby Jr of Blobbington and Blobbington Incorporated is TRYING to study! You've DESTROYED THE COMMUNAL ZEN GARDEN!!
And THEN you look not even a mile east? And it's the floating island of Blobs. They LIKE that rock. It's just an ever shifting, accidentally rolling off the edge, falling slightly, making an offended squeek, and floating back to the top of the pile to repeate the process, MOOSH of thousands of blobs. No one's certain if they used to be seals or some sort of cat.
Apparently THAT island is Warm(tm).
So there they sit. Making contented noises, chirping and shoving for the best spots. They never leave. You can literally just... float up and sit on them. It's amazing. You gotta be careful not to get buried, but it's So Soft and bouncy? And they are ALL making that soft happy Blob vibrate noise. It's like a giant, island sized, warm and almost fuzzy but not, water bed that massages you.
Just DON'T start anything there! Holy SHIT are they territorial. You Will Die. They SWARM.
And THATS not even getting into the Blobs that are? Literally brainless. Some people eat those. Which? I guess? They ARE basicly Ectoplasm jello. But SOME of them are NOT? Like... it's a debate. Hot button issue, ya know?
Some fungus turns into Ecto Jello with negative IQ and delicious insides. Is this food? But OTHER fungus was SENTIENT in life and become a whole RANGE of Fungus ghosts, from Blob right on up to complexe dryad like ghosts! Clearly NOT food unless you are a MONSTER. But THEY argue the FIRST group are ALSO not food?
Plant Ghosts have strong opinions and are willing to Gruesome Violence about it.
Which brings us back to the Humble Blob Ghost! Check before you pet! That might be grandma! Or planning to eat your hand! Just as Mammal tells you little to nothing about what animal you are looking at, so too does Blob and Ghost! Stay safe out there! And if anyone sees a glowing green rabbit? I want my blood back! That's supposed to be in MY body! Rude!
@hdgnj @stealingyourbones
"My name is Ishigami Senku." The voice over the transmission announced to the gaping crowd of NASA's finest, "And I'm calling from three thousand, seven hundred and forty one years in the future."
"You think he's being legit?" Someone asked.
"Sure seems like it." Another agreed, "It would explain how the transmission doesn't seem to be coming from anywhere at all."
"Say we believe you." Their chosen spokesperson said into the transceiver, "Why would you call us?"
"To stop a crisis that will lead to the death of 99.975% of the human population. Time is of the essence, so tell me: have you seen stone swallows lying around?"
----
The initial call sent the international scientific community into crisis mode.
Day in and day out, they conversed with these scientists of the future. Even ones who weren't Senku. After the initial shock of finding out that people from their age were still alive four thousand years ago, they adjusted quickly.
Of course, it wasn't all diligent work and apocalypse thwarting.
"Ha-HA!" A voice they had never heard before echoed over the Time Call, which was open almost 24/7, "So, this is our way to the past? I desire it!"
"The hell...?" Luke whispered, looking at Mandy, who shrugged wordlessly.
"Listen up, anyone who's there. I know you're taking orders from Senku and the others, so I need you to do a favor for me."
Their spokesperson hesitantly put her hand down to activate the transceiver, "Uh, okay? What's the favor?"
The boy on the other side called excitedly, becoming more ecstatic with every word, "I want you to go to the CEO of the Nanami Conglomerate. And tell him that his bastard children did what he never could, and have taken control of the entire world's capital. And it's just us two featured in the official family portraits! And then, tell him to go fuck hi-" He was cut off by someone bodily dragging him away from the mic.
"What is wrong with you?" Sai, the future's best computer programmer, yelled, barely in range of the microphone.
"Should we be listening to this?" Mandy asked.
"I desire vengeance!" The rambunctious boy insisted. There was a sound of a scuffle, and then Sai spoke again, closer to the mic and clearly addressing them.
"Sorry about that. My little brother is... a bit out there. It was probably the family ostracization."
They all clearly wanted to know more. This wasn't the first shred of juicy gossip from the future they'd gotten, but the spokesperson was nothing if not professional.
"Let's just get back to work, yeah?"
Boo.
[Part of a larger DCST time travel fic I really don't have the time to write, so I just put in the two snippets that obsessed me the most. Tell me if I should continue this into a proper fic!]
Tucker finally gets his hands on a Wayne Tech phone. It’s far more powerful than his PDA. The universe trembles in fear with what he can do with just a little upgrade.
brought to u early cause I stayed up late to finish it, it’s Jazz/hospital
she’s the ride or die type, she was ready, she had the car packed to go and a guy on the line for fake passports,,
Altered ages ASL in modern AU.
Original by [ 侑 ] yu_si02
PERSONAL ASSISTANT DANNY AU!!!
Amity Park has a lot of strange things going on, and because of that, is notoriously known for paying much attention to anything outside the city limits. So when Danny Fenton gets applies and gets accepted to be the personal assistant for the CEO of Wayne Enterprise, he doesn't think much about moving to Gotham. The pay is ridiculously good, and the benefits? Don't even get him started.
But with supervillains, vigilantes, and way too many kidnappers running amok, Danny's starting to realize why the job's hazard pay was so ridiculously high.
Meanwhile, the rogues of Gotham city are seriously wondering where Wayne managed to get such an insanely strong bodyguard.