Crying
- A Psalm for the Wild-Built, Becky Chambers // kagonekoshiro
eternally plagued by being the "intellectual" friend (has surface knowledge on everything) while being the most socially sensitive (can be friends with just anyone) BUT personally cold and aloof friend (needs a lot of distance and alone time)
The following are excerpts from a letter of advice she sent to a 17-year-old aspiring author by the name of Leonard W., whom she had taken under her wing as creative mentor.
I like to live always at the beginnings of life, not at their end. We all lose some of our faith under the oppression of mad leaders, insane history, pathologic cruelties of daily life.
Older people fall into rigid patterns. Curiosity, risk, exploration are forgotten by them. You have not yet discovered that you have a lot to give, and that the more you give the more riches you will find in yourself. It amazed me that you felt that each time you write a story you gave away one of your dreams and you felt the poorer for it.
You must not fear, hold back, count or be a miser with your thoughts and feelings.
It is also true that creation comes from an overflow, so you have to learn to intake, to imbibe, to nourish yourself and not be afraid of fullness. The fullness is like a tidal wave which then carries you, sweeps you into experience and into writing.
Permit yourself to flow and overflow, allow for the rise in temperature, all the expansions and intensifications.
Something is always born of excess: great art was born of great terrors, great loneliness, great inhibitions, instabilities, and it always balances them.
If it seems to you that I move in a world of certitudes, you, par contre, must benefit from the great privilege of youth, which is that you move in a world of mysteries. But both must be ruled by faith.
Sometimes you don't feel strong enough to face your problems. Some days the best you can do is exist. And that's okay. It's okay to just be for now.
friendly reminders:
you don't have to be productive every day
you are worthy even if all you did today was get out of bed
there are people out there who care about you
your existence makes a difference
if something bothers you, then it bothers you. no one has the right to tell you otherwise
you are allowed to take up space
there is no 'right way' to grieve
you cannot put a time limit on emotions
your likes and interests are valid and they matter
it's okay to take your time in doing things. not everyone can do everything at the same pace
It can be really hard to learn to engage in positive self talk, but sometimes it's easier to start by pretending it's coming from a friend, first 💜
If you have no other option, you will succeed.