James And Sirius

A small fic written for day 5 of @goodgodfathersiriusblack fest: first day of school. Also, merry imp-mas for @impishtubist i remember when I was a mere chaos anon on your inbox and now I am proud to call myself your friend. <3

Sirius has promised himself that he would not cry. 

At least not in front of Harry. It’s not a rule for him usually - all the parenting books he devoured when Harry was still a mere baby suggested that it would be healthy for a child’s development to see their parents cry sometimes - but today everything needs to stay fun. The last thing he wants is to make Harry worry for his sake; that boy can be ridiculously sensitive sometimes. 

His resolution starts to crumble the second they are both on the platform nine and three quarters. It is full of people, animals and a lot of noise - Harry grabs his hand out of habit, although he rarely does it in public anymore. Tears are prickling behind Sirius’s eyes, but he blinks them stubbornly away and turns to smile at the little boy. “Are you ready to go?” 

Harry nods but can’t mask the nervousness. Sirius can’t remember if he was frightened before his first train ride. If he was, it didn’t last long, because once he ended up in the same compartment with James, he knew his life was about to turn for the better. 

“You will do great. Just do your best, have fun and remember to write to me at least once a week so I don’t need to apparate all the way to Scotland.” 

He is only half joking with the last one. Harry is shifting from one leg to another, setting his glasses better on his nose, and running his fingers through his hair. Sirius is not sure if he is even listening to what he says, or if he has gotten lost in his thoughts again. 

“Don’t forget to let a niffler loose in Dumbledore’s office, it would make him very happy.” 

“Yeah yeah”, Harry answers absentmindedly and Sirius keeps himself from laughing only barely. He taps the boy’s shoulder to get his attention back, and crouches down to hug him. Harry buries his face on Sirius’s shoulder, his heartbeat pounding like a small animal against Sirius’s own. 

“I love you”, Sirius says quietly. 

“I love you too”, Harry answers. His face is full of determination, as he grips the handle of his trunk and looks towards the bright red locomotive. Sirius kisses him on both cheeks before finally letting his son go. He stays long enough to see the train leaving the station, and only once he is alone in the sunny central London, he starts to sob.

“are you sure?”

Sirius pauses in front of the stove, pointing his wand at the flame to lower its intensity before turning to face Harry, who’s looking quite nervous. “You know, you’ve asked me that question so many times that I’m beginning to wonder whether you want to me to come to the match.”

Harry flushes. ‘I do want you there! I mean it. It’s just that, if you’re busy or have better things to do, it’s okay if you don’t want to come. Actually, I’m sure you have better things to do, you’ve only just been freed, and you probably want to.. I dunno,. go to the shops or something or-” 

“Can I cut in before your rambling cuts off your oxygen?” Sirius interjects gently. He glances back at the stew bubbling on the stove before returning his gaze to Harry. 

Harry gives him a sheepish smile. “I suppose so.”

Sirius laughs. “Thank you for your graciousness, Your Majesty. Now, it is precisely because I’ve just been freed that I want to come to your match more than anything. I’d much rather support you as a human in the stands as opposed to a dog by the forest. It’s a much better view, you see.” He gives the contents of the pot a quick stir before returning his focus to Harry, his tone turning a bit more serious. “I know we’re new at this. This you and me being a family thing. But I want you to know that I’ll be at all of your games because I want to be there, and I want to cheer you on. I’ve missed out on a lot of your life, and I really don’t plan on voluntarily skiving out on any more. I’m proud of you and want to see you be excellent. And trounce the Slytherins while you’re at it. Got it?”

Harry lets out a small sigh. “Okay. But if you ever have anything better to do, I won’t be mad or anything.”

“I’ll never have anything better to do,” Sirius promises. “You’re quite a brilliant player, mate. There’s not much better entertainment than that. I’d die of boredom if I didn’t come to your matches. You’re even better than your dad was.”

Harry blushes at the praise, but also straightens up a bit with pride. “Yeah?”

“Absolutely,” Sirius assures. “Now come over here and have a taste of this stew. It’s my secret recipe, and I swear you’ll love it.”

this is so me lmao

sirius: i’m so mysterious

also sirius 10 minutes after meeting anyone: -and i think that’s the day my mom stopped loving me

This is soooo cute I am going to puke rainbows and confetti

The Black Brothers

(I’m writing fluff of them because I can’t find any. Oh and of course there will be angst, but angst with a good ending. Lots of comfort💗)

Regulus listened to the pouring rain that hit the windows of the tower. How the fuck did he get himself into this? Sirius was an asshole, he had abandoned Regulus, when he made friends with potter that is, right…? But now he was laying down in Sirius’ cozy Gryffindor bed, with a heating charm over him. Sirius silently putting homework in his bag, after giving up trying to do it. They weren’t saying a word to each other, Sirius occasionally muttering to himself. Sirius had said he had wanted to talk to him about something important, that’s why he had searched for Regulus, he had found him, in the bloody lake! Regulus had felt a sort of stability, not because of the water, but because he was alone. Well, until Sirius came. Sirius had found him and said he had wanted to talk with him, Regulus snapped at him. Sirius convinced Regulus to come out of the water, as he did so, Sirius took his cloak off, putting his own Gryffindor cloak on him. Since his cloak was soaking wet from the water, not to mention his entire uniform.

Because of how the cold was effecting him, Regulus had lost balance, his knees buckling, Sirius caught him, and even though Regulus tried to resist, Sirius had picked him up and settled him into his arms like a child. Like how it used to be… Sirius had refused to leave Regulus alone, he was confused. Regulus and Sirius weren’t close friendly brothers anymore, and he thought Sirius hated him, but he was second guessing now. Because Sirius had given him clean warm clothes, a bed, warmth, food, water, he had gave him hospitality and shelter when he had denied it.

Regulus needed to get better, apparently the coldness of the lake was quite dangerous, it had really affected Regulus. And Sirius just willingly took him in…why? Did he still- well..- care….? Regulus had been snapped out of his thoughts when he felt Sirius pull his blanket down slightly. He lightly shivered, even while being under a heating charm. Regulus locked eyes with Sirius. “Why…are you doing this..?” Sirius went back to doing whatever he was doing, probably examining his body for anything he would have to worry about. “Doing what?” Regulus let out a deep breath, when he spoke he didn’t expect his voice to be broken and wet with sadness, tears he didn’t know he was holding falling down his face. “Why….why..are you taking care of me…you hate me, so why.” Sirius stopped examining Regulus’ body, instead looking at him. “Tell me why, I would hate you, Reggie. Why would you ever think I hated you.?” Regulus let out another shaky breath, before going on about all the reasons why he would hate him, why he SHOULD hate him.. “Regulus, I would never hate you, I need you to understand that, alright? I’m sorry for…everything. Everything I’ve done, I’m a horrible brother….I’m so sorry, Reg..” Sirius was sitting on the bed now, crying as well. “I’m sorry for not paying any attention to you, making you feel like the second choice, never being even a decent human being towards you…” Sirius shook with sobs, Regulus was staring wide eyed at his brother, crying as well. He rarely saw his brother vulnerable, he always put on the strongest brightest face. Sirius seemed to choke on his sobs. “Fuck, I’m SO sorry, Regulus..” In one quick motion, Regulus embraced his brother, crying into his shoulder. “Stop it..” he had barely managed to mutter that out..

It was not even twenty minutes later, when the rest of the marauders had rushed back into the Gryffindor boy dorms, very concerned by why there best friend hadn’t been at dinner. Only to find him, fast asleep in his bed, cuddling- wait..his brother? Everyone thought they hated each other…But they didn’t do or say anything about it, just got ready for bed like usual, and fell asleep. Sirius peeked his eyes open after a bit, he almost thought his little brother would be gone when he opened his eyes, but he was still there, in his arms, head buried in his chest. He was so indescribably happy to have his little brother back. He started humming, humming a song only him and Regulus knew. And eventually, he fell asleep again, and apparently Regulus did too, even if Sirius hadn’t known he was awake at all.

I hope this wasn’t a waste of your time, I know it’s badly written, please just give me a break about it, I’ll try to get better at writing💗 I’ll try to write something more detailed and less cringe soon🫶

To throw up confetti! Again!

(wrote this for all the sirius + harry fans who were having rough days yesterday ((more than one??? y'all good??)). have some fluff? maybe? i don't even know anymore.)

-

"Budge over," Sirius said as he sat down on the edge of his godson's bed, Harry currently laying in it with a hooded sweatshirt pulled over his head in the dead of summer, and as far as Sirius knew, this had been the outfit of choice for a few days now.

Since Harry had come home from a date and retreated to his bedroom, some melancholic record playing loud enough to signal to Remus and Sirius that something terrible had happened.

The first night Harry had cried.

The second night Harry had shouted at the both of them.

The third night Harry had decided the silent treatment was the best course of action and he was going to stay in his bedroom no matter how many times Sirius offered to buy him anything under the sun or Remus tempted with heartbreak dessert.

"I don't want to talk, Sirius," Harry mumbled, scooting over a minuscule amount to allow his godfather to join him in bed. Sirius took the space though, moving so he could lean against Harry's headboard, one arsecheek on the bed, the other hanging half off.

"Okay, you don't have to," Sirius said, clasping his hands together and resting them on his stomach. "Thought you might like some company though."

"Why would you think that?" He asked roughly, rolling to his side to avoid eye contact or interaction.

"Because you're sad. Because I raised you and know that when you get hurt, you want someone to stay with you. Like when you fell off your bike down that hill?" Harry twisted his neck slightly so he could look at Sirius, "Went too fast...fell so hard. I don't think I've ever ran so quickly in my life to get to you."

"I was fine though...nothing was broken."

"Oh no, but your knees had some bad scrapes on them, a few bruises. I didn't know having something physically broken was the threshold for injury."

"I just mean it wasn't that bad."

"At nine it was. And the whole day you just wanted to be around one of us. Slept in our bed too."

"I'm not nine," Harry muttered, though he moved so he could mimic Sirius's position, sitting up slightly and folding his hands over his stomach, Harry's pointy elbow touching Sirius's.

"You're not, I don't even wish you were anymore, you were a little hellion."

"What? No, I wasn't."

"You used to hang upside down off the third floor, do you remember that? Climb over the railings and hook your feet in and just drop. I'm actually shocked I'm still alive after witnessing that a few times."

Harry cracked a small smile, "Well that was the fun part..."

"Mhmm, I know it was. See? Nothing but trouble," Sirius nudged Harry with this shoulder, noticing that his godson had moved closer to Sirius as he spoke, their elbows overlapping. "But...thing is, even if you had fallen off the railing, or the banister collapsed and you came with it. We'd bandage you up, figure it out, fix the railing. It gets a bit harder when the hurt isn't physical. Nothing's broken, not really, right now and yet..."

"Fucking sucks."

"Broken hearts really fucking suck," Sirius responded, nodding.

"It...just sucks to feel like he didn't want me anymore. What do I do about that?" Harry asked and looked up to Sirius, their shoulders now pressed together. Sirius took a chance, moving one of his arms off his stomach and wrapping it around Harry.

Harry didn't pull away or fidget under the touch. Not a single eye roll.

"You...sit here, and you listen to all the sad music," Sirius started, deciding to leave out the moment in time where he thought he was going to charm Harry's record player off after hearing "I Had a King" for the 30th time, "and you...let someone sit with you until it doesn't hurt so much. Scrapped knees heal, so do hearts."

"You sure?"

"Well the alternative is you being heartbroken for the rest of your life and never leaving your bedroom and I'm okay with that too," Sirius said, "I'll still hang out with you. I'll grow a long white beard sitting here with you."

Harry put his head on Sirius's chest, and Sirius's hand went to the back of Harry's head, resting on messy black hair. "I...I don't think it'll be that long. You know?"

"Yeah."

Harry Potter the Casanova of Gryffindor Tower.... Sounds great to me! What do u think?

GGSB Fest 2024 - A Changed Ball

@goodgodfathersiriusblack

After the first task, Sirius reaches out to Harry to offer dating advice for the Yule Ball, which changes things.

AO3

***

Given that the first task is finally over, and Harry survived, Sirius can breathe a little sigh of relief.  At least one task down, and the fact that he did so well makes Sirius incredibly proud.  Next on the order of business for Harry is probably the Yule Ball.  Since he’s a champion he’s probably going to have to open it, and it may be a bit presumptuous, but Sirius couldn’t resist offering dating advice to his godson.  He figures he’s young and he doubts the Dursleys would bother to offer much guidance.  

Hopefully, Harry doesn’t really need too much, but Sirius had to offer just in case.

Sirius smiles when he gets another owl so quickly, Harry writing to him will always make his day.

Sirius,

What do you mean there’s a ball for Yule?  What do you mean that I have to open the ball?  

No, no – they can’t really expect that from me, right?

You’re pulling my leg, right?  Please tell me you’re pulling my leg.

If not, I need help.

Say hi to Buckbeak.

Harry

Sirius is stunned for half a second.  How had Harry not known about this?  Then, again, no one appears to tell the kid anything.  

Alright, well, at least Sirius was right to offer.  He’ll just have to meet with his kid on his own and give some concrete advice.  

Everything will be okay.  He’s sure of it.

***

“I still don’t get how they could expect this of me,” Harry groans as he sits on the floor of the cave beside Sirius.  “I mean – dragons are one thing, but girls?”

Sirius laughs.  “They’re not as scary as you think.”

“They travel in packs, and they giggle like … like my mere presence is hilarious.”

“They’re giggling because one or more of them have a fancy of you – hard not to given everything, and they travel together because … well, I never really understood that.”

“What am I supposed to do?” Harry questions, seeming quite freaked out.  “You were right, McGonagall says I have to open the ball with a date, and it’s only been like a day and a half, and every girl has gone nutty and I don’t know how to dance and I don’t want to go on a date… this is – this is unfair.”

“And the whole dragon thing wasn’t unfair?”

“The dragon thing was actually kind of fun.”

Sirius snorts and rolls his eyes.  “Alright, let’s start with the basics.  First, you have to select who you’re thinking of asking.  I would suggest someone you either fancy and want to get to know – but know there will be awkwardness and you’ll have to push passed that or a friend that you could potentially enjoy an evening with.  You could perhaps go with a friend that is someone you may possibly fancy or go with a friend that is someone who would only be a friend, but you’d have to be clear about that.  Do you have any ideas?”

He watches as Harry digests this information and says, “Well, I could go with Hermione if I wanted just a friend, but I think that would upset Ron and frankly, be unfair to her.  I’d really like to go with Cho Chang – I kind of, maybe, have a fancy of her, but all I know about her is that we’re both seekers.  I suppose another friend could be like Parvati Patil or maybe Katie Bell.  I’ve talked to both enough that maybe it could be… a friend date.”

Sirius nods.  “Okay, let’s leave Hermione out of it.  We wouldn’t want to disrupt your friendship with Ron again so soon.”

“Agreed.”

“That leaves Cho, Parvati, and Katie.  Now, this is where you have to make a decision – do you want someone that you barely know, but fancy or you know, but don’t fancy?”

Harry shrugs.  “I mean – it would be nice to get to know Cho better.”

“Okay, that’s fair.  You’ll have the dinner and dancing to get to know her, if you ask her,” Sirius states.  “Now, before asking, you should make it clear that you’re not that into dancing, but if you ask any of them to go, you should expect to dance more than just the opening dance.”

He groans.  “It’s bad enough having to do it once.”

Sirius nods.  “Yes, but you’re going to a ball.  It’s expected that you dance.  If you don’t want to dance too much, you should make that clear so that they don’t expect to be dancing all night and are disappointed.”

“Okay, but what if I tell them and they say no?”

“Then you have to accept no for an answer and find someone else who would be willing to support you.”

Harry nods.  “I suppose that I should try and learn dancing then?”

“That would be a good endeavor.  I’d suggest asking someone you’re comfortable with to practice or your date would be better, but it could be embarrassing admitting that, so you could always Hermione or one of the quidditch girls who would no doubt love to help you.”

“That sounds like a good plan,” Harry states.  “What about the actual asking?  If they’re traveling in packs…”

Sirius laughs.  “They may giggle, but simply ask for a moment alone and once you’re alone, tell them either – that you’d like a romantic date to the ball or a friend date to the ball – depending on who you ask.  Explain about the dancing to help them make a decision, and once they do – if it’s yes, ask them to meet up to practice dancing or if it’s no, accept their answers and move on.  Just be sweet and polite and you’ll be okay.”

“That sounds easier than it’s probably going to be.”

“It’s usually not that bad, I promise.  Maybe a little embarrassing, but the sooner you do it, the better,” Sirius assures him.  “Then you can focus on the actual date.”

Harry grimaces.  “Besides dancing, what would be expected?”

“Well, you should meet her at her common room probably with a nice flower – try asking her favorite or finding one that matches her dress robes.”  

Harry nods.  “Sounds easy.”

“You should offer your arm, and smile as you lead the way into the ball and take out her seat first before you sit.  At dinner, make sure you talk to her about her interests.  Start with something you have in common and let the conversation flow.  If it stalls, try to ask about things that are around you – the food, the music, the dancing, the people… anything that can spark something.  Remind her about being uncomfortable with too much dancing, but that you’ll make an effort.”

“Okay, okay.  Seems like genuinely good advice so far,” Harry says.  “Then, of course, the dancing.  I suppose if we practice before it might not be so bad.”

“I’m sure it won’t be as bad as you’re imagining,” Sirius assures him.  “Make sure to still pay attention to her as you dance, and if need be, make light conversation.  If you’re done dancing or taking a break, try finding a quiet area to continue chatting from dinner.  Don’t ignore her and even if it ends up being Parvati or Katie rather than who you fancy, remember that you can’t just glare at your fancy’s date – just focus on your own date.”

“Yeah, that – that wouldn’t be fair to her if I was staring at some other girl.”

“Exactly.  The focus should be on making sure that you’re both having a good time.”

“Okay.  Okay.  What about at the end?”

“Walk her back to her dorm, tell her you had a great time – if you fancy her (and this could go for if the date started as a friend, but you find you do like her) – then ask her to have another date.  This could be something simple and we can talk about that when the time comes in a letter.  Just maybe vaguely ask if she’d like to go out again.  If she says yes, tell her that you’ll let her know a time and place, if she says no – respect it and thank her for being your date and that you hope she enjoyed it.”

“And… then leave?”

Sirius tries not to laugh.  “Well, she might expect a kiss on the hand, the cheek or even the lips.  It all depends on the vibe, just go with your instincts on that one.”

Harry swallows, but nods.  “I guess.”

“It’s not as bad as it sounds,” Sirius attempts to assure him.  “Just take it one step at a time.  You’ll be fine.”

“If you’re sure…”

“I am, I promise.”

***

A few weeks later, Sirius knows that Harry’s managed to ask Cho to the ball.  He’s nervous, but he’s been preparing for the ball, and Sirius has assured him that it should be just fine.  He just needs to relax and not worry so much.  

He also told him to write to him afterwards no matter the outcome.  He wants to know how well his advice went over.

He grins when the owl arrives.

Sirius,

Thank you – thank you – thank you!  Your advice was perfect.  

Cho and I had a great date.  We practically danced the night away!  Okay, maybe not.  She was okay with only dancing half the time, but we went for a walk and – and it went so great that she kissed me before the end of the night!  

There was plenty of kissing before a final dance and walking her back to the dorm.  It went so well she said yes to a second date.  

So, now, I need advice on that.  Got any ideas?

Thanks again,

Harry

Sirius grins, happy for his kid.  He’s happy to offer more dating advice as long as his kid needs it.  

He’ll certainly be a ladies’ man after this.

Just like his father and godfather and it’s great.  

Christmas 1976, Potter's house.

Euphemia: Come on, open the presents!

James opens his gift: A 1700 nimbus, thanks mom.

Fleamont: And here is my gift. *hands him a red box*

James: What is it... *sees a bunch of letters* romantic phrases?

Fleamont: if you use them this year maybe Lily won't reject you again.

*Sirius and Remus start laughing*

James: hey that's not fair.

Remus: Well, it's my turn. *opens a gift with his name* I assume that because of how badly wrapped it is, the gift was given to me by Sirius.

Sirius: I did what I could.

Remus: Chocolates! Thanks!

James: Sirius what are you waiting for? Open your gifts!

Sirius: I got gifts?

Remus: Obviously!

Sirius happily opens the first gift (from Remus): A mint? Oh... hey I don't smell that bad.

James: Open mine.

Sirius opens his second gift: A leather jacket, you know me prongs.

Euphemia: You still need to open the last one.

Sirius: Let's see... *grabs a small box and opens it* A letter!

*Euphemia gets watery eyes and Fleamont hugs her*

Sirius begins to read the letter: "We hope you do not get angry with us after this, we want you to have a better life, if you accept we will be very happy and if not, do not worry, we will not get angry. With love Euphemia and Fleamont Potter. *confused, grabs the next piece of paper* I don't understand, they are adoption papers. Are you going to adopt someone?

*James smiles at her and raises his eyebrows*

Sirius: Wait- *sees his name on the papers* No. You guys... I...

*Sirius runs to hug Euphemia as the two start crying and Fleamont joins the hug*

James and Remus raise their glasses: Happy Christmas!

ok who else needed a hug after reading this

do you think you’d be willing to write how the marauders react to you hugging them out of nowhere (and you aren’t dating?)

oh, hello there.

you hug the marauders.

tags: james potter x reader,, sirius black x reader,, remus lupin x reader,, headcanon,, fluff,,

a/n: thank you for the request anon! look at me being active again lol

james would definitely be surprised, like jumping-out-of-his-skin surprised. as he is the more affectionate between the two of you. he would probably freeze up at first before relaxing once realizing it was just you. and then freezing up again because oh my god it’s you. and you’re hugging him and you look so cute and feel so tiny behind him, and so warm and why haven’t you been doing this the whole time? all of his suave, gone the instant your arms would wrap around his waist. a bumbling, blushing mess—that you fail to see, too busy burrowing your face into the curve of his back, hiding your own flush, trying your damn hardest to hold him as tight as you could. he’d try to twist around in your grasp, his big warm hands going over yours to try and loosen your hold. he’d want to turn around and hug you properly, to wrap his own arms around you, to pull you in and just engross himself to your touch. to the feel of your body against him. but you refuse to relinquish your hold on him, worried he might feel your warming cheeks or the erratic thumps in your chest.

sirius wouldn’t know what to do at first, arms raised like he’s afraid of touching you wrong. but then he would see your squished cheeks against his chest, he would see your eyes closed and the calm deep breaths you take that prickles his neck. if you two hadn’t been standing, he would’ve thought you had fallen asleep with how still and calm you looked. slowly he would lower his arms, tentatively resting his hand on your shoulder, and when you don’t move or open your eyes, he wraps it around you too. his hold getting tighter and firmer around you. he would whisper a question of whether or not you’re okay, or what had happened to solicit a hug so suddenly. you would just say, nothing jus’ wanted a hug. and he could feel his chest feel a little bit full, his heart a little bit bigger. he thinks if this is what hugs always felt like, then he was seriously missing out. though he has an inkling of feeling that no other hugs from anyone else can feel this good and comforting.

remus being everyone’s favourite leaning post, he had grown accustomed to the casual and abrupt touches of his friends and housemates. although he wasn’t the type to initiate said touches nor is he the type to reciprocate it. but for you? his response is almost automatic. you would walk over to him and hug him for whatever reason, and automatically his arm would wrap around your shoulders and gently squeeze you back. hugging him from behind? he would reach behind and pull you even further into his back and keep you there until he feels you pull away. hugging him from the side? he would rest his arm over your shoulder and keep you there. others would notice this exception and relentlessly tease him for it. but it wouldn’t ever be enough to deter him from touching you back—from holding you close, because why would it? when all their teasing only holds the truth. it doesn’t matter if he expects the hug or not, he would always hug you back. because he likes when you touch him just as much as he likes to touch you.

Personal headcanon:

Sirius was Harry's dogfather (according to harry) and well... Sirius being Sirius never corrected him sooo when they met and sirius told him firsthand that he was Harry's godfather a memory surfaced in both of their brains and they both looked at each other

"You know when you were little you used to-"

"-call you my dogfather?"

"Well, yeah - how'd you remember that?"

And harry justs shrugs

I need a fanfic about this if you know any do tell me in the comments or reblogs or whatever

Now @zazima be a dear and pls write the scene where sirius went to hogwarts with the dmle folks too😊

“dear harry,”

read “dear sirius” first

Hey kiddo, relax. I’d be quite the hypocrite if I got mad at you for losing points. Just be careful next time, please. Maybe stick to smuggling items on Filch’s banned list as opposed to fire-breathing, sharp-toothed illegal magical creatures. Also weren’t you wearing the cloak? How’d you get caught?

Does McGonagall still wear that tartan dress robe? If so, please tell her to upgrade her wardrobe to the 90′s.

I cannot wait to see you at the Quidditch match. Is the new broom holding up well? Either way, I know you’re going to smash it!

Love,

Sirius

Dear Harry,

One “Defending Yourself and Others- the Practically Perfect Way” is enclosed, my studious child. You owe me five Sickles by the way- I told you he’d be nuts. And no, I have no desire to learn what that crackpot’s favorite colour is. I’d much rather have one-on-one tutoring with Snape for the rest of my life, which is something I never thought I’d say.

Love,

Sirius

Dear Harry,

Do I need to get you a Remembrall? Slip is attached, although I’m not sure you even need it. Didn’t you memorize all of the secret passageways by the time you were 9? I would like it on the record to that you did that of your own volition; I had nothing to do with it. 

And I don’t know what you’re talking about. Sugar Quills? I don’t touch the stuff. It’s bad for the brain, you see. And my brain needs to be extra sharp in order to keep up with you and your shenanigans.

(Although if you happen to see them, I’m sure the extra-long lasting ones would be excellent. Just to see what they’re like, of course).

Love,

Sirius

Dear Harry,

Not to worry my young worrywart, we will wait to open presents, drink hot chocolate, and make my famous Christmas pancakes until you get home. Father Christmas normally waits for no one, but this year he’ll wait for you- I’ve put in a good word (although I’m tempted to take it back as payback for calling my decor horrid).

Now for the Ball, it’ll probably help to not refer to any possible date as “stupid”. They’re much more likely to say yes that way, you see. Other than that, I suggest asking someone (boy or girl, doesn’t matter who) that you generally get along with and enjoy speaking to. It’ll make your night at least a little less painful. Perhaps one of your Quidditch teammates? Or someone from your classes?

Don’t ask someone only because you think they’re attractive. It may lead to awkward conversation, awkward dancing, and awkward excessive butterbeer consumption that leads to a night spent on the toilet. Not that I’m speaking from experience, of course. But if I was theoretically recounting my experience I would like it to be known that it was not me who ended up on the toilet. It was my theoretical date. 

As for dancing… I’m quite pants at that even with the forced childhood lessons. Maybe ask your date to give you a tutorial? Or at least a practice dance to make sure you don’t muck up the opening.

Also I checked for your dress robes- they’re not here. Are you sure they’re not buried at the bottom of your trunk?

Best of luck, kiddo. Don’t forget to send pictures at the Ball- I’m running low on blackmail material.

Love,

Sirius

Harry-

I’m coming to see you and bringing DMLE folks. Be in Gryffindor common room in half an hour. 

Don’t worry, I’m on my way.

Sirius

P.S. Thank you for telling me. I’m proud of you