I Really Can’t Believe I’ve Been On This Hell Site For 8 Years

naturally makes no sense for nor to wear the nordic cross in his hair during his viking days so please consider him clipping his hair back with something like this

ocean vuong / sandra cisneros / haruki murakami

influencers don’t get it. sure you can stage beautiful pictures of your beautiful self in your beautiful house in expensive workout gear without ever going to the gym. take a mirror selfie that isn’t actually a mirror selfie. it’s you holding your phone with another camera on a timer. get your 500k instalikes. sell tea that makes us shit. vitamin supplements we piss out. you will never have the impact of a girl blogger with 10 likes on a post about the strawberries she got on sale at the grocery store today. i love when social media is a diary. i love you mundane expression. i love you pictures of pets i love you casual selfies i love you weird lighting. i love you diary entries. i love you alive girl

I want you to remember:

The fascists hate you too and they just will pretend otherwise until after they've killed the rest of us, before they turn on you.

Wait what it's been a year already? Huh, it didn't seem quite that long to me. Anyway, I see what you mean by cheeky - I like it, and that last part

"Are you decent?"

"Morally? No. But if you're wondering if I have pants on, yeah, you're good."

for some reason had me absolutely wheezing. Can't wait to see the next chapter 💖

<TEASER> No Harm List | Pt. 11

 Warnings: None, a lil suggestive ig

Rating: PG 13 

Word count: 577

A/N: wow okay. I really wanted to post an update in celebration of NHL 1 year anniversery! But that’s jusnot happening. So instead I am posting this short little teaser. I wrote this scene back in likee October, I think it’s so cheeky, so I hope you guys enjoy it when you give it a read. Please know this is very bold of me to post bc I do not have chapter 11 written or even drafter super well so I’m really commitmening myself to this moment here. But I hope it does spark joy! Thanks again for all the love and for making my first year as a writer so dang wonderful! 

———————————–

You groaned as you rolled over. Even with your eyes closed, you could feel the morning sun mercilessly shining down on you through your eyelids. 

You could tell you fell asleep without removing your makeup by the way your lashes seemed to resist when you moved to crack one eye open. They were nearly fused together by the clumped waterproof mascara you foolishly applied before going out. 

You went to nuzzle your face deeper into your navy blue pillow, becoming all too aware of how your throat was dry and your tongue felt too big for your mouth before you remembered you don’t own a navy blue pillow. Your bedding was grey. 

Your body went rigid as you took in the plush king-sized bed that was far nicer than the second hand full you furnished your apartment with, and smelled enticingly of a spiced cologne. 

This is Hoseok’s fault. 

You thought bitterly as you recalled his promise that he wouldn’t allow any one-night stands. He abandoned you and left you helpless to be lured by some sexy stranger. OR worse. 

You felt like cold water was poured down your back at the potential that you weren’t in a stranger’s bed but in one of the members of BTS. 

Oh god, oh god you had to get out quick. 

You hoped out of bed your head spinning and your sore body protesting as you made your way to the windows. Your smooth thighs brushed together and you looked down to see you were not in your clothes from last night, but instead, an oversized olive green tee shirt that hung just above your knees. 

You had to admit it’s more modest than what you wore last night. But being in a mystery lover’s clothing did leave you unsettled. You pat your bottom for a moment and smiled in victory when you confirmed your panties were still on. 

You continued your dizzying journey to the window now more bodily aware. Your hangover wasn’t the worst you’ve ever experienced, but that didn’t mean it was comfortable when you pulled back the blinds slightly to peer through the window to try to get a check on your location.  

You hissed at the morning light as you took in the familiar rose garden that lined the back of the Den’s property. Your stomach sunk at the view and you still don’t know if you rathered it be a stranger. 

Suddenly you became aware of a lack of noise. 

With a creak of a faucet handle and the groan of the pipes in the walls, you heard the shower come to a stop in the connecting bathroom. 

Your heart raced as the chances of you facing your dance partner of the night came closer. 

Ready to just bite the bullet and face your doom you made your way to the bathroom door and knocked lightly before pushing it open. 

“Hey I’m so-AHHHHHH”

“AHHHHHHHH” Taehyung shouted back at you as he struggled to wrap his towel around his waist. 

“Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!” you cried as you pulled the door shut. 

Your breathing hitched in panic, and you struggled to slow it in your flustered state. After a moment of hearing him shuffle around the bathroom, you knocked again, louder this time. 

“Are you decent?” You called hesitantly. 

You swear you could hear his smirk through the door as he responded, “Morally? No. But if you’re wondering if I have pants on, yeah, you’re good.”

Deafening silences.

Hey, don’t cry. Free online database of Japanese folk lore

A charm for you: a lover's token, a handkerchief, stained with blood. It will turn aside a blow to the heart, but that's no mercy to me now.

No, you’re far past mercy of any kind now, aren’t you.

-ˋˏ txt + random angst prompts i think ab before i go to bed ˎˊ-

[ ༻❁༺ ] foreword : have i cried from said prompts before? yes.

[ ༻❁༺ ] warnings : angst, mentions of insults, infidelity, and implied death

[ ༻❁༺ ] genre : angst

the other members under the cut !

choi yeonjun ; he didn’t mean those words.

yeonjun held his breath as he realized the words that just left his mouth. the red he saw in his eyes dissipated into thin air, realizing the weight of his anger as he watched his hurtful attacks sink into your system. his hand twitched to reach out to you, his throat itching to say something, anything to take back what he just said. he didn’t think it would, or could escalate this far. his heart clenched as he watched you close your mouth, taking back anything you were going to say back to him. countless regrets were swimming in his head in that moment, and he was unsure if he could ever reverse the damage he already dealt.

he watched as you simply turned away from him amidst his growing self-loathing, his legs paralyzed as he watched you turn around and exit the door with tears pooling in your eyes. in the blink of an eye you were gone; truth be told, he didn’t know when he forced himself to stumble to the sofa and sit down, his breathing heavy and panicky. you weren’t in the wrong for any of this, he only had himself to blame. yeonjun had no excuse to lash out the way he did—you didn’t deserve to become his punching bag.

yeonjun sat in silence, unmoving as he hoped and prayed you’d walk back through those doors for a chance to explain himself and apologize profusely. he waited hours in the same position, zoning in and out of his thoughts with a rigid posture over the sofa. he needed to tell you he didn’t mean what he said. you should know, right? that he’d never do anything to hurt you.

but the longer he waited, the more he realized just how little of a chance he was going to get.

choi soobin ; you were almost enough.

you didn’t understand how soobin could be so cruel with pushing you away, his face void of any emotion as he placed his hands in his pockets. his words were indefinite, and though you tried so many times to see through his harsh attitude, all attempts were futile in the end. he was wicked enough to let you believe you were worth staying for, when you should’ve known the truth from the start.

—

it took soobin everything in him to stop himself from yelling out to you, his fingers shaking as he watched you disappear into the distance. did you not notice the way his voice faltered when he told you to leave? did you ignore how he purposely didn’t look at you? he was sure it was a sign he didn’t actually mean it. he’s the one who always told you that he didn’t mean anything he said unless he was staring into your eyes. his heart fell to his stomach as the image of you fading, lifting his hand to his face to the fresh feeling of crying.

you didn’t deserve to have your feelings toyed with, nor did you deserve to be treated like a game. soobin’s lips quivered as he clutched a fistful of fabric around his chest, unsure of what to do next. he was such a fool to let you walk away so easily, he was the idiot for not trying hard enough. even worse—you left thinking that you weren’t good enough. the words were there, right at the tip of his tongue—he knew he wasn’t worthy of you, nor your heart.

you left thinking you were almost enough for him to stay, but soobin stayed knowing you were always more than enough—and he’d never be able to measure up.

choi beomgyu ; you weren’t different from the rest.

there was a different kind of pain that traveled through beomgyu’s system as he came face to face with you, your face horrified at the scene before you. the body that clung to him, lips pulled with the smirk both you and him knew all too well. he didn’t even have the strength to pull away—how could he? you saw the damage he dealt. you saw how he broke his promise, his end of the deal. you didn’t even need to ask why—you had always known he would never be satisfied, even if facing the truth brought pain.

beomgyu couldn’t stop you as you simply feigned calmness, his face dropping as you smiled at him, nodding in understanding as you simply took the initiative to walk past him. he managed to pull his arm away from the other as he tried to follow you, but with each step he took, you seemed to walk faster. no words were shared between the two of you—he knew he messed up. the worst part was, he’d never get another chance to make up for it.

he promised he’d mend his ways for a chance with you. thinking about it now, beomgyu didn’t even know why he relapsed back into how he was before. he was better than those temptations, that the only physical contact he needed was with you. you warned him, so many times—you’d leave if he went back on his word. you reminded him over and over again, for fear you’d get hurt in the end. and he swore up and down that he’d never do anything to hurt you.

but in the end, you ended up being the same as everyone else. and he was left alone, back again at square one.

kang taehyun ; give up, he’s won the war.

taehyun didn’t realize just how much you knew of the enemy, how easy it was for him to slip up and get too comfortable with you by his side. he filled your visions of a romeo and juliet fantasy, where the two of you could run away together and start anew. and you fell for it—you fell for him. a perfect man, so charming, endearing—

until you found out he wasn’t.

his heart sank when he saw that knowing glint in your eyes—the one that told him that you knew everything he wished you didn’t. how he was in on the plan to use you for infiltration, to tie your heartstrings to the kite that would soar for his family, warring against yours. taehyun didn’t know how or when something changed in him, how your smile enchanted him in ways he promised his father he’d never succumb to. he wasn’t allowed to fall for the bait—yet his heart yearned for him to admit the truth when you appeared, tear-struck and betrayed in front of him.

he wasn’t allowed to apologize for the things he did—the plan was fool proof, he just happened to land in the worst case scenario. he created an apathetic facade as you tried to search for answers through him, looking for any sign that this was just a nightmare. he rooted his feet to the ground when you realized you wouldn’t get anything from him, clenching his jaw as you took a deep breath, wiping your tears before walking away.

taehyun was the reason they won the war, but he felt no desire to celebrate. what good was a victory, when loss was all he received in return?

hueningkai ; he’ll love you when he’s gone.

hueningkai didn’t know how to comfort you in such a heartbreaking time, reeling from the way you cowered into a corner when he appeared in your bedroom, his body translucent and shimmery—the way ghosts would appear in movies. his non beating heart wrenched in agony as you screamed profanities at him, yelling for the hallucinations, the misery to leave your head. he wanted to reach out and touch you, to comfort you that everything was alright.

his departure from this world was all too soon—there were so many things he wanted to do with you, to see with you. hueningkai wanted to stay with you. he watched you shrink into the corner of your bedroom, lethargically walking step-by-step forward to not alarm you. you had no more fighting power to throw anything his way—your chest heaved with pain as the ghost of your beloved knelt beside you, a sad smile on his lips as another round of tears welled up in your swollen eyes.

he didn’t know what to say, how to apologize for hurting you the way he did. he didn’t know how much longer he had left before he had to depart from this world—but he had to try. hueningkai reached forward and tried to caress your cheek with his thumb, gulping nervously as he watched you try to lean into his touch. he felt nothing, but the way you closed your eyes to imagine him next to you was enough for him to relax. no words were spared between the two of you as he spent his last moments with you, nothing but love shared between you two until he heard bells ringing from afar. he turned to you then, noticing how his own body flickered in front of you.

though you cried once more, you nodded and whispered goodbye, before you’d lose the opportunity for good. hueningkai left a final kiss on your forehead—a sign that he’ll always love you, even when he’s gone.

Cave boy Danny starts talking about one of the debates Tucker and Sam without mentioning their names when asked who the two are,Danny panics again and says that Sam is Selina since that's not that big of a jump when he starts saying her name

"One of my best friends would agree with you." Brucie suddenly speaks up one night at Dinner when Damian rants about his school not offering enough Vegetarian options. "She is an ultra-recyclo-vegetarian."

Bruce blinks having never heard the term before. A quick glance around the table tells him that neither have the others. Must be slang from his universe then. "What does that mean?"

"She doesn't eat anything with a face," Brucie explains. The curve of his lips has the tiniest amount of bestowed fondness that could only come from infatuation. Oh, Brucie is sweet on the girl. Bruce feels mildly alarmed as all his kids and Alfred sits up in interest when spotting it.

Unaware of what he just unwillingly gave away Brucie continues "Not to be confused with being a vegan because she will eat bread and cheese, but not often. She gets real mad when people mislabel her."

Dick grins, leaning over his forgotten dinner to pin Brucie under an eager stare. "I bet. Mislabeling is the worst."

"It is!" Brucie agrees, seemingly satisfied that someone else feels the same. "Especially when getting her to like you is like trying to get a cat's approval. But it's totes worth it when you do. No one has your back better than her."

A....cat's loyalty? Oh no. Surely it couldn't be-?

"What's your best friend's name?" Steph speaks up asking what's on everyone's mind. They all lean in a little closer as Brucie mindlessly gathers some rice on his fork.

"Her name is Sa-" Brucie takes a bite of his rice before swallowing. It takes everything in him not to quote Alfred and scold him for speaking with his mouth full. How Brucie grew up with such manners, Bruce would never know. "Selina! Her name is Selina."

Oh.

It seemed even in another world Bruce's heart would fall into Selina Kyle's hands.

His kids all but burst into cheers. Even Jason, and that was very hard to accomplish in the last few years.

"I knew it! I knew it!"

"Of course, it's Selina! Who else could it have been?"

"I suppose Kyle is not too horrid a partner for Father."

Duke and Cass high-five while Alfred seems to be glowing in parental pride as the other kids chat about his on-and-off girlfriend again. If a civilian version of himself still fell for her, Bruce could convince his Selina to quit the crime life and be his permanently.

Brucie stares a comprehensive eye around the table, so Bruce takes pity on him.

"I have a Selina as well. My kids....enjoy her company." He says, watching blue eyes swing at him as tiny black bangs fall slightly over them. It's adorable, and he finally understands why he had so many admirers. He bets civilian Brucie breaks just as many, if not more, hearts than he did at that age. "How long have you known Selina for?"

"Um...since she moved to my school when we were ten, so about four years, give or take?" Brucie shrugs, a slight blush overtaking his face. "She's great."

Oh, Bruce bet she is.

"Wait." Tim suddenly speaks up, eyes narrow in mistrust. Bruce had noticed before that the second youngest was suspicious of their dimensional visitor. He had been meaning to pull him aside to talk about it. "You said one of your best friends. Who is the other?"

"...Ethan. My other best friend is Ethan," Brucie says after a moment. He must mean Ethan Bennett. Bruce thinks wistfully of the old days when he would play basketball with his dear friend before he was lost in Clayface.

But why did Brucie pause on Ethan's name like that? It almost seemed like he was very carefully selecting that name or was trying to control his facial reaction to it.

A familiar blush bloomed over Brucie's checks and- oh. The boy had spoken about wishing he was from a world where bisexuality was more common, didn't he?

It would make sense. It's not like Ethan hadn't crossed his mind once or twice when Bruce was a teenager, either.

Tim's eyes narrow further. "I don't believe you."

"And I believe you can't stand the sight of your reflection because you're convinced no one will ever want it either." Brucie cheerfully chirps back before closing his eyes and sighing as if tired. He slumps in his chair, leaning his head against the headrest. "Sorry, that was mean. I'm trying to be less mean."

Bruce frowns at him, aware of Tim's eyes going glossy to his right but his son doesn't seem to want to step away. All conversation stops as they glare daggers at Brucie. Dick especially seems the most upset. "That was uncool Brucie"

"Yeah, sorry force of habit. My older sister and I-"

"Your what?" Bruce cuts him off, wondering if he heard right.

"My older sister?"

"You have a sister?"

"Yeah, don't you?"

"No," Bruce whispers. "No, I don't. I'm an only child."

"Oh. I'm the second youngest. I have an older sister, an older brother, and a younger sister." Brucie turns over to Tim to offer a sincere apology that the other gracious takes, but Bruce can't hear him over the sound of blood rushing between his ears.

"Mother and Father had more children?"

"Kind of." Brucie's face twists slightly in consideration. "Tommy and Harley are adopted. They are technically cousins since they were made by my uncle Vlad. Kate.....my older sister Kate, is my aunt Alicia's bio-kid but she was raised by my parents since she was one since Aunt Alicia wasn't...in the best mental state to care for her. No hard feelings are between them."

"Tommy, as in Tommy Elliot?!" Dick gasps, springing to his feet. "He is your adoptive older brother!?"

Brucie appears startled by his reaction, but he nods all the same. Bruce feels dread sink into his stomach.

"He's evil!" Dick shouts.

"I know." Brucie shrugs, uncaring. "Tommy has some issues, and he had them since he was...fourteen, but he's not dangerous.."

"Did you all miss that he said Harley is his younger sister? Harley as in Harleen Quinzel?" Jason cuts in, twisting to pin Brucie with a hard stare. "That's her real name, isn't it?"

"Well, her real name is Harleen Wayne, but she prefers Harley," Bruice says carefully. "Why? Do you know her?"

"She's evil too!" Dick gasps. "Brucie, you're in terrible danger with those two around!"

"Nah, Kate will stop them." Brucie waves his hand. "Sides Tommy and Harley are always traveling. Neither are home much these days."

Bruce feels a headache growing behind his eyes as Dick desperately tries to explain what happens to Brucie's adoptive siblings in their world. At the same time, his counterpart argues on his sibling's behalf.

(No one knows about the electric candles disappearing from the dinner table as the house descends into madness, trying to make the dimension travel realize his danger. Even fewer are aware of Danny's silent apology to Sam, Tucker, Jazz, Dan, or Dani for butchering their names and somehow still connecting them to someone in this world.)