AU Where Gus’s Parents Do Send Him To Meitner And Shawn Is So Distraught And Unhappy Only Being Able

yaehh

nightmare -- [b. swan]

Notes: okay so, this is going to be aprox. eleven-ish (counting the epilogue) chapters. It’s going to be a character study plus plot and obviously BAMF! Bella.

summary: 

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Just learned there is an hour long remake of the Princess Bride with different celebrities playing the parts in each scene, filmed at home on people's cellphones during the lockdown. The commitment to the bit & various props and costumes are so so funny. The seminal duel between Inigo & Count Ruben is played by Javier Bardem & Bryan Cranston and they both kill it. Anyway, here's the full mobile version and here's a version that tells you who each person is.

I like to think Bella has so many vampire questions that she just randomly thinks of that she has a note in her phone that she just adds each thought to, and each time she goes over to the Cullen house they play a quiz show type game with buzzers where Bella asks her questions and they buzz in to answer. The points aren’t reset at the end of each game so the numbers just keep getting higher and higher

• Edward keeps saying “you can just ask me questions instead of all this stuff” referring to the buzzers, after this he was permanently disqualified for ‘being a bit of a dick’

• Emmett and Jasper are usually either tied or first or are very narrowly in first or second

• Emmett lost 25 points once for trying to buy points by dropping a grizzly bear at a human Bella’s feet ‘just in case she wanted to try’ much to Edwards dismay she found it hilarious and just patted the bear on the head before telling Emmett he should finish it on her behalf

• Jasper also lost 25 points for trying to find out questions beforehand. He kept subtly asking Bella her thoughts on ‘vampire stuff’ and made her feel all warm and fuzzy, she wasn’t happy about this one

• Although the entire family is involved, Esme usually just comes up to Bella later to elaborate on people’s answers. Rosalie is only sometimes interested but gets a kick out of Emmetts entertainment. Carlisle usually sits back with Esme but you’ll occasionally hear a very distinct buzzer away from where Emmett and Jasper stand, Carlisle is sitting in an armchair like some sort of benevolent king with an answer ready and surprisingly humorous

• Alice is very eager, but gets most of her joy from seeing Jasper get points rather than answering things herself. Though if anything even similar to fashion comes up she sees it and buzzes in so fast Bella has barely finished her question

The weirdest guy I ever met in a church was this boy who referred to “Buzz Aldrin and his husband” going to the moon. I was completely baffled, and when I asked if he’d misspoken, he got really angry and accused me of being deliberately ignorant of the facts. It turned out that he was somehow comvinced that Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong were married. It took five Wikipedia articles to convince him otherwise.

they were so funny for this

Break My Heart: Masterlist

Chapter One

*23 year old Marinette and Chloe at a bar in Gotham*

Marinette, straight up vibing when she spots Jason: Chloe, Chloe he is so pretty what do I do?

Chloe, being viciously shaken by the arm by Marinette looking over at Jason: Do you mean tall, dark, and scary? We avoid him

Marinette practically vibrating: No, He is hot. He is very much so attractive. I'm gonna go shoot my shot

Chloe, pulling Marinette back by her ponytail: Oh no you don't. He would crush you like a bug

Marinette, glaring at Chloe: oh I wish he would. Preferably with his thighs

Chloe, completely done: You have issues Mar. You have issues.

Marinette, freeing her hair from Chloe: Hopefully they are issues he likes, now let go I need to go seduce him

Roy, who had been sent to get them drinks and was watching Marinette thirst over Jason: *Snort*

Chloe, who has been waiting for an excuse to throw hands with somebody: Whats so funny, Carrots?

Roy, shakes his head and turns to Jason: Hey Jay! Help me carry these back to the table?

*Jason looks over and sees Roy pointing at a very red girl staring at him before she sprints towards the bathroom, pulling a blonde with her*

Jason: What was that about?

Roy, walking back to the table: A little miss somebody has a crush on you. She was going to shoot her shot but her friend thought you were bad news. Seems like it was part of the appeal to her though.

Jason, now looking towards the bathroom in hopes of seeing her: Is that so? Was it the blonde or the one with freckles?

Roy, smirking at Jason: How did you notice her freckles? Were you staring?

*Jason shoves Roy, blushing as he walks to the bathrooms*

Roy, shouting after him: That's it buddy! Follow your dreams! She's just behind that door!

*Jason does not return.*

Jason was tired

Tired of his own family treating him like an outsider

Of Bruce being more Batman than dad

Of feeling like he wasn’t enough

Tired of that case, the monument to his fucking death

Of being the “good soldier” that died, as if he was still dead

Tired of the nightmares

Of waking up screaming for a father that would never come

Of dying over

And over

And over again

But most of all,

He was tired of being really fucking angry all the time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So he did what he should have done a long ass time ago and got out of the toxic environment he’d spent most of his life (and death) in.

He got himself legally resurrected

Found a great therapist

Got his GED

Made sure his criminal enterprise would be well looked after

Went to med school

Became a doctor

He finally started living his life, not the one Bruce wanted.