I Really Need To Give Alan Wake A Second Chance, Playing It Myself Was Enough To Want Me To Pull My Hair

Because I can feel my depression kicking in, this is a reminder to anyone this may come across

Take care of yourself and listen to your body, not your brain, especially if it’s cruel to you.

Allow yourself to rest, you aren’t selfish for taking care of your needs

Please, for the love of all that is holy, drink water! Your body will thank you so much

Get out and enjoy ‘the freedom of nature’s gifts’ because fresh air and a good walk definitely can help you, especially if you’re someone who stays cooped up inside all day long.

Remember too, your family cares about you, and if your family doesn’t, your friends do, and if they don’t, someone out there in the world does

Help me, Lord, from these fantasies in my head / They ain't ever been safe ones

Room 302

Mouthwashing hyperfixation please save me

our yimpy

Me after eating half of a footlong

I really need to read the comics for DMC Devil May Cry, I’m so starved for content with that game.

I understand why many didn’t like the game, it’s full of edge and it’s definitely too loud and crude with its humor, but that was the style of the time *insert Simpsons clip here*

Kat is a character I really like and wished we got to see more of, even if it was just a mention or a reference to her. She’s such an interesting character, though I think as someone who maladaptive daydreams I’ve related to how she uses Limbo as an escape when things become to much, escaping the nightmares of you will.

Dante in the reboot is just so fun, he gives off that punk attitude so well but we see him as a character grow and develop as the game progresses, becoming more mature, fighting for a reason and understanding those around him more, not just a “selfish brat” but a young adult growing up and maturing

Plus I’m just a sucker for Kat and Dante as a couple, please, spare me a crumb of cute Kat and Dante content, please I beg

My love of Haunting Ground

Demento is the perfect horror experience.

Haunting Ground (or Demento in Japan) is the perfect horror experience in my opinion. It is a unique kind of horror that no games have done since, which is such a shame as the game is just... it's incredible; from the music and aesthetics to the story, it's just perfect in my opinion, so now I'm going to ramble about it for as long as it takes me to write this thing :3 (Spoilers ahead, if you can find a copy of this game (physical or emulated) I 100% recommend you play it!)

Its roots in Resident Evil.

A fun fact that people may not know is that Haunting Ground is very much linked to Resident Evil 4! People usually look at the dog that helps you in the El Gigante boss fight early in the game and joke that Hewie, the dog that accompanies you through Haunting Ground, is that same dog however there's more of a connection between the two games than just having the similar dogs.

A lot of people are aware that Devil May Cry uses some pieces of a scrapped plot for Resident Evil 4, but the same is actually true for Haunting Ground too! Specifically, it uses pieces from the RE demo which was dubbed Resident Evil 3.5: The Hookman Demo, which was obviously scrapped. The main plot of RE3.5 was a decent concept: "It was Spencer’s castle. Everything started from the castle owned by Spencer, when the ruin was found, and aristocrats started digging. They found the primal virus and Spencer began to have his ambitions. Leon infiltrates this castle seeking the truth, meanwhile deep in the catacombs of the castle, a young girl wakes up in a laboratory. She starts to ascend the castle, accompanied by a B.O.W. dog" (source :3) In this version Leon was also supposed to be infected, and the game would have two different stories to playthrough, similar to Resident Evil 1 and 2.

Although many pieces became part of the final product, a majority ended up being the main features of Haunting Ground, specifically the main location being a castle, the main character being accompanied by a dog, although the reasoning for the main character being accompanied by a dog is a little negative, as the developers were nervous about the game only having a female protagonist would hinder the games popularity and sales... which unfortunately happened anyway due to Capcom focusing its marketing on Resident Evil 4, likely making people who played that and hated Ashley (even though she is a perfectly fine character and I will DIE on this hill) compare her and Fiona without even playing Haunting Ground.

Horror and life.

This game is one of the best horror games as the story links so perfectly to Fiona and her womanhood, the way she's treated by the other characters in the game, the horrors she has to face... everything. Through the whole game, outside of some small craftable items, there are no weapons. You have no way to eliminate your stalker outside of their boss-fights, only stun them/hold them in place to give you enough time to run and hide. Those are your only real options, run and hide. You can't over-use the same hiding spot either, or the stalker will easily find you. I'm not kidding, the AI for this game is incredible and some of the best AI of the time, including the AI for Hewie! The thing that makes this game perfect is the fact that, well... the game could never work with a male protagonist, its themes work so perfectly with womanhood, as if the pair are woven together.

The fear you feel in Haunting Ground is so... familiar, it can be familiar to anyone; the feeling of dread, of not knowing if someone is coming after you, the paranoia; trying to figure out where to hide, trying to remember certain routes and area layouts.. that itch of fear when the area falls to total silence, making you freeze up and hold your breath until you hear footsteps and realise you have to RUN. That fear is so familiar, and I adore it in this game, I am so glad that you have no weapons, because that fear wouldn't exist anymore; you don't fear what you can fight against, after all.

An Innocent Freak and Objectification.

(Okay!! We're getting into spoiler territory here so if you wanna experience Demento go watch a playthrough or play it!! Dw I'll wait!)

The game starts with Fiona waking up in a cage with nothing but a sheet covering her. The cutscene shows a large ogre-looking guy reaching out to grab her, but he is scared off by thunder and leaves the room; Fiona then wakes up and looks around, leaving the cage once she finds it unlocked. The girl finds a dog collar with the name Hewie, gets startled by said dog, and then leaves the room she was trapped in. At the end of this cutscene we finally gain control of Fiona. Walking through the area, the only way we can go is up some stairs and into a castle, finding ourselves in the main suite of the castle. Soon we're introduced to the castles maid, get some actual clothes to wear, and can begin exploring the castle to try and find a map; the first main objective of the game. Walking down a hallway on the 2nd floor you can hear a dog panting, a cutscene starting when we get to the corner.

We are then introduced to Debilitas (yes, his name is literally Disability in Latin, I wish I was joking), the gardener of the castle and our first stalker. Debilitas is a play on the gentle giant trope, he doesn't truly mean Fiona any harm, he just doesn't realise how strong he is, or that Fiona is a living being; in his mind she is a new doll for him to play with. After the first interaction with Debilitas, where you learn about hiding spots, you're free to return down that hallway and continue in your search for a map. The search ending in the kitchen where you find it, then get some more cutscenes.

Throughout Debilitas section of the game, (which I'll just call the castle section for now) you get multiple interactions with the homunculus, showing his mounting frustration at the fact he cannot play with his "dolly". The fact he doesn't mean harm at first comes from his animations, all of which paint him in an innocent, childish light; swatting at Fiona, biting his nails and bouncing around while giggling, even picking her up in a bear-hug (something that can instant kill Fiona if you don't act fast enough.) He does slowly get angrier, the anger culminating in his boss-fight where he corners Fiona in the castle chapel. This boss-fight is the only one where you have a way to pacify the stalker without killing them, your choice dictating the ending you get, which I find to be a shame as I would have loved to be able to save the next stalker we're going to talk about.

If you defeat Debilitas peacefully, by tricking him into breaking the winches holding up one of the chandeliers (you can do it yourself, but it takes much longer than if you get Debilitas to do it) then the gardener will finally leave Fiona be, realising his mistake but still managing to objectify her, now viewing her as an object of worship instead of a mere doll. It means he leaves Fiona alone now, so perhaps it isn't all bad. Finding the homunculus in his shack, he gives you a key that unlocks a door in the bathroom and leads to an item that can help you through the game (or another ending if you've already beaten the game once :D)

Debilitas is no longer a threat, however we're given a new obstacle to face, it could never be that easy...

Womanhood and the thought of Something Lacking.

After the boss-fight with Debilitas, we obtain a key called the Saturnus key, which (obviously) unlocks the Saturnus door on the third floor. Before we can unlock the door, however, we are interrupted by Daniella who tells us that dinner is ready and leans a little too close for comfort (*cough cough* ambiguously gay moment- *cough*). Daniella tells us how she's meant to be the perfect woman, but is lacking the things that make her complete; the sensation of taste, the ability to feel pleasure and the ability to feel pain. While not said in that moment, there is also the fact that Daniella is also infertile, unable to bare children. This is what feeds her need to hunt down and eliminate Fiona, as she is a "real woman" in Daniellas eyes thanks to the fact that she, unlike the maid, has Azoth; the alchemical essence of life and, in Daniellas words, woman.

It's obvious Daniella hates herself and envies Fiona, as not only does Fiona have what she wants, but she is also treated much better than the maid is. There is a scene in the Castle section of the game, after we are warned about Riccardo by a man on the phone, where we can see Daniella getting interrogated and beaten by the groundskeeper; Daniellas model also has cuts on her hands, likely given to her by Riccardo.

Fiona and Daniella are the only two women in the whole game too, every other character is male, which honestly makes them two halves of one whole, both of them are objectified in different ways. Daniella was likely mistreated for years, as she's only a couple years older than Fiona, and it only adds to how damn crushing it is. Daniella is also the best stalker of everyone in the game, likely the one players will die to most of all (although I'm biased because she's the one who killed me most-) unlike with the others, you can't hide behind doors as Daniella closes every door she walks through, and she is much better at looking through hiding spots; there's also two hiding spots Daniella can hide in, both of which being closets (Capcom what are you tryin' to say/j).

Something that I think is disappointing is the fact that Daniella can't be saved. You cannot pacify her, your only option leads to her death. The worst part about it is the fact that originally you were supposed to be able to save her, but it was likely scrapped to save development time. Daniellas death is, ironically, incredibly gut-wrenching to me, as she is one of my favourite characters, and her death is the only time we see her truly smile, smiling as she finally feels pain... or finally realises that what she felt, while negative, was still a feeling. To be totally honest, I literally cried at Daniellas death. I'm not kidding. I was stood, petting Hewie while crying as I felt so guilty for killing Daniella, as in my eyes she is the most tragic character in the game. Just with Debilitas though, the safety cannot last forever.

We take the Mars key that Daniella dropped, say our (tearful) goodbyes (and apologies bc god I felt so guilty) and unlock the door that leads deeper into the mansion to try and find our escape.

Weakness and a Sly Hunter.

Once we find a room with a homunculus floating in green liquid, we're chased by the castle keeper, Riccardo. Riccardo is pissed that Fiona wants to go home, despite being the heir of the castle. He is awful, but he is pretty easy to evade if you pace yourself well. The problem comes once you leave the mansion, finding yourself outside of the mansion you get separated from Hewie (which can lead to the worst ending of the game if you abused the poor boy). Wandering through the chaos forest, once you find Hewie and bandage his wound, Riccardo chases you, but unlike every other time, you don't have Hewie to hold him off. Eventually Fiona gets cornered and we find out the truth; Riccardo and our father were clones, and Fiona holds the Azoth of Aureolus Belli an alchemist who cloned himself as a form of immortality as he attempted to learn the great truth. This ended with Ugo (Riccardo's brother and Fiona's father) as he ran away with Fiona's mother; leaving the clone before him to hope that Riccardo was the one who inherited the azoth instead.

Riccardo wants to use Fiona's azoth to create a new line of clones... the worst part being the way that the clones would be created, (I'm sure you can put two and two together). Riccardo is just foul, making a serum to turn himself invisible just to torment Fiona once she escapes her cell in the water tower; the only way to really hold him of being Hewie as he can see through the serum.

Riccardo's focus is on tormenting Fiona, scaring her into submission (shooting at her, turning invisible and mocking her) he is just awful, and it's clear he sees Fiona as just an object, similar to how he saw Daniella. If she didn't have azoth, he likely would treat her just as he treated the stalker before him. His boss-fight is the easiest, but that is likely because of just how hellish he is on the way toward the fight. There are no hiding spots, and he chases after you on nearly every floor of the water tower, excluding the planetarium at the top floor as that is a puzzle room and stalkers are unable to enter puzzle rooms until they've been completed. The worst thing about the boss-fight is just the line "let me into your womb" which is just... *barfs*

Once defeated, and the bridge to the final area of the game is raised, we can finally leave this hellish area, right?

... 

right?

A Warped Obsession and the eventuality of death.

Ha, NO :D! We have one final enemy, remember that man on the phone who warned us about Riccardo? Well, he's an enemy too! The mastermind behind everything... the clone that created Ugo and Riccardo, Lorenzo Belli. The stinky rotten gross corpse eww eww he it so gross I hate him so much.

Lorenzo is the only one who actually wants to kill Fiona (well.. I guess Daniella did too but shh she is allowed to have a mental breakdown after everything she went through) He is awful, vile, and just as disgusting as Riccardo. He is the most frustrating stalker as the House Of Truth, his area, is a maze that is very easy to get lost in, and it's even easier to not grab the map for the area (which makes the area harder to traverse) the area is the most draining to Fiona, as Lorenzo intentionally makes himself younger to mess with Fiona. He should get killed *multiple* times, but he so damn stubborn; even chasing after Fiona as a flaming skeleton (and not the cool kind of skeleton either) as the House Of Truth suffers earthquakes and crumbles around him and Fiona. He is an instant kill like this too, and it's just AWFUL trying to get through this final section of the game.

The relentless chasing of Fiona is common between all the stalkers, but this corpse takes it to the next level, refusing to let up even when should have died. The irony of him and Riccardo is perfect however, especially in Lorenzo's case... His obsession with immortality lead to his death.

He is the most off-putting character however, as Lorenzo is watching from the very beginning; watching Fiona get dressed at the very start of the game, at one point at the start of the game you can hear him call Fiona while walking past an area in the gardens, a cutscene occurring if you walk over to where he calls for her. He's there from the beginning and he doesn't care how Fiona feels; making his death all the sweeter.

Acta Est Fabula, Fortes Fortuna Juvat.

Finally... at the morning of a new game, Fiona and Hewie can finally escape this hellish place. While trying to unlock the door, the weight of Fiona's experience catches up with her, making her hands tremble and her breaths shaky, but before she breaks down, Hewie barks and brings her back to reality, reminding her its all over now, and she doesn't need to be scared anymore. As she calms down, she unlocks the castle gate and pushes it open, turning back to look over the castle one last time. Debilitas opens the front door to begin his tasks in the front garden, looking at Fiona he bows to her; showing his respect to her and sending her off. Fiona turns back, calls for Hewie, and they finally leave the castle.

However this only ending 1 of 4.

Some consider this the best ending, me being one of them, as Fiona was able to overcoming everything and escape the hell she was forced into. Ending b, Ignis Aurum Probat, is identical to ending A, only Debilitas does not appear as this ending requires him to be killed.

Ending C it another ending which is considered the best, which I also agree with, as Fiona goes through the least trauma in this ending. Yeah she has to deal with Debilitas but hey, at least she doesn't have to kill best girl Daniella (in my head she goes back with Hewie to save Daniella later). Unfortunately Riccardo and Lorenzo are still alive in this ending, however it's unlikely they would live much longer with the girl gone. This ending is the only one you can't get unless you play through the came once already, as it is the quickest ending and doesn't let you experience the full story (Think of it like the joke endings/items in Silent Hill, you have to properly experience the story first before you get the silly stuff.)

Tu Fui, Ego Eris.

"Huh... weird writing..."

Ending D is the worst ending, where Riccardo gets what he wants. The only way you can get that ending is by treating Hewie awfully and I'm sorry but if you do that then you DESERVE this ending. Every ending unlocks something if you get it, other than this one. You don't deserve nice things if you hurt Hewie.

Dona Nobis Pacem.

Haunting Ground is an incredible horror game to me. In an era where most horror games are just action games with horror aesthetics, this game is gorgeous, it's horrifying and I adore it to no end. If you can play through it, I thoroughly recommend that you do. It's a breath of fresh air in a genre that is starting to grow stale, and I can only hope Capcom will remake/remaster it so that it's more available for everyone that would like to play it.

Thank you for reading all the way through this, its taken me *checks clock* FOUR HOURS?! oh jeez- well, I hope you all enjoy reading my incessant rambling about a 19 year old game that Capcom is probably never gonna remake, feel free to comment or share, bai!!!