God Gave Me The Greatest Misfortune: Meeting You, Needing You, Loving You.

eddiemcnson​:

+++

shit. shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. he should’ve known, should’ve known that this was a bad idea, should’ve known better than to ask a current resident of hicksville, indiana if he was flagging. stupid, stupid, god, what had he been thinking? nothing, apparently, and now his mind was wiped empty once more as he stared at cole blinking at him in confusion - and, what was that, curiosity? - as eddie scrambled for something to say. he cleared his throat. 

“never….mind.”, he said slowly, cautiously, tongue pressed to the roof of his mouth. shit. eddie shook his head. “nothing, nothing. i just thought -” oh my god, munson, shut the fuck up. “i just - “ no matter how hard he tried to stop himself the words now fell freely from his lips. “well, i wondered if you…well, do you know someone named - “ if he didn’t stop talking right then and there he was going to explode. well, spontaneous human combustion it was, as he simply carried on. “are you…perhaps a friend of, uh. of dorothy’s ? “ a beat passed, eddie sucked on his bottem lip nerverously. he waved it off. “you know what….nevermind. nothing. it was stupid.”

he flashed him a pained grin, nodded, ‘right, then’,  and turned on his heel. already squeezing his eyes shut because oh, the embarassment now creeped up on him, made his cheeks flush. at the last minute he decided to turn back, walk back to cole. “can i bum a cig off you?” please, please, heaven, god, if there is one - eddie thought to himself as he stared at cole expectantly -  please just don’t let him bring it up again.

xx.

Cole’s eyes sparkled with amusement and curiosity as he searched his brain. Dorothy? Flagging? What was Eddie trying to ask him? And why was he speaking in this obscure code? At first, Cole wondered if it was a DnD thing, but then realization hit when Cole spotted a bandana in Eddie’s back pocket. He instinctively reached for the bandana he’d tucked in his own pocket and the amusement on his face morphed to something akin to wonder. 

At Eddie’s question, Cole nodded and held out the pack, though his eyes were still glazed over. As Eddie plucked out a cigarette, Cole offered his lighter. He wanted to say something, at least to put Eddie at ease, but he wasn’t sure if he was ready to say it out loud. No one knew yet... well, that wasn’t true, because there was Steve and then there was Max. What the hell?

“I am, too,” Cole said, abruptly. He lowered the cigarette from his lips and looked at Eddie, motioning to the flag. For some reason, he felt the urge to prove it. God forbid Eddie thought he was playing a mean prank. “Do you remember Adam Richards? Tall, broad, blonde? He was my... well, you know,” Cole stumbled through his words, feeling his cheeks heat up. He was never this awkward. 

zccming​:

“cole.” max said flatly as he rounded the corner. while her glare was cold as steel, the gradually growing grin on her face said that she was happy to see him. “it’s an emergency.” that was certainly a dramatization, but she’d say whatever to make this look … less bad. it’s not that she cared what cole thought of her, but she refused to submit to the idea she was perpetuating any negative stereotypes. as he drew closer and provided the suggestions she had asked for, she rolled her eyes and mocked him “did you try to pick the lock? the fuck would i pick the lock with?” max held up her hand, “my fingernails?” 

she approached the front door anyhow, then levelled with the lock. “i have a better idea.” max once again found a rock, picked it up, but this time smashed it into the lock. bingo. the lock fell off. while max wasn’t expecting the door to only have an exterior lock and chain, she was happily surprised to find that the physical door itself hadn’t been locked. she pulled it open, ushered cole inside, then closed the door behind them, “i just need some groceries.” max shrugged her lie then grabbed a basket as if she were actually shopping, “happy memorial day.” she snickered, turning down an aisle, “have any not-totally-lame plans for today?”

xx

Cole paused for a moment, but refused to give Max enough dead air to think she'd bested him. "I don't know, don't girls always have, like, bobby pins?" he threw his hands into the air with a faux exasperated sigh. He hid a grin behind an eyeroll. Though he'd never admit it out loud, Cole liked the bickering relationship he had with Max; it was like she was the little sister he never had. And, though she would never admit it, he knew she liked it too.

"Jesus, Max!" Cole glanced around to make sure no one had heard the crash. At Max's nonverbal invitation, Cole slipped inside, shaking his head in amused disapproval. He wasn't exactly pro-breaking and entering, but it was one lock and a few groceries? Who would it really hurt? "Well, get something fun at least. To celebrate," he chuckled, motioning towards the shitty grocery store beer. Meanwhile, he made a beeline to the soda aisle. There it was: a sparkling 2 liter of Wild Cherry Pepsi. He grabbed two, and craned his neck out into the aisle, "Are you calling me lame? Why would I share my plans with you when I'm at risk to be insulted again?"

zccming​:

“something like that…” max stared at her shoes for a moment. she couldn’t recall precisely what the report had said, she merely knew that she was pulled out of the fire along with her friends and what her lines were for when she couldn’t quite place herself in the fabricated story, “–it, it happened really fast.” then, she divulged, “i don’t remember what they even said and i don’t read those stupid articles about the fire.” max huffed, getting more agitated the more she spoke off book. she didn’t take well to personal questions, even from cole. not because she was mad at him, but she was still so mad at everything, and that was an unnerving beast to let roam around outside her mind. yet, max had still managed to share something with him. some real frustration about the cover up, even if he didn’t know.

the ghost of a smile on cole’s face told her that she had been successful in aiding his mood. “i’m always right.” she assured, a curve in her own lips appearing. max took the blunt and puffed on it, mirroring cole’s body position. “and you aren’t?” she deadpanned, “sometimes  i’d say you’re more than–” if he didn’t seem so urgent when cutting her off, she would have told him to shut the fuck up. and once cole fully asked his questions? max was wishing she had. her mouth dried and her jaw clenched. was billy like, different, right before? that didn’t even begin to describe it. lost in the terror in her chest, max didn’t speak until she felt a stinging on her knee. looking down she clocked the source; burning ash on her skin. she had forgotten about the joint. “shit.” she winced, brushing it off, then immediately passed it back to cole. he might have needed it for what she was about to say.

the cover up infuriated her at times, but simultaneously, max understood why it existed. it existed for people like cole, where the lie would hurt less than the truth. the lie would still hurt, greatly, but she wouldn’t wish knowledge of that supernatural can of worms on anyone. ears burning, she prepped the fib on the tip of her tongue, “he wasn’t.” i totally didn’t like, lock him in a sauna or watch him nearly kill my friends. max fought back the urge to pick at her nails, “but then again, billy was always weird.” she rolled her eyes, wishing it was that simple and shook her head, “i don’t know.” 

she left it at that. 

in some kind of miracle though, max’s mind was torn away from billy, and her attention was averted somewhere rapidly different. she looked at cole, brows knitted deeply in thought. so many puzzle pieces clicked together all at once. adam wasn’t a best friend, he was a boyfriend. there was a stray inkling about it, once, a heart-to-heart ago when max was equating his feelings about adam being gone to hers about her best friend el ‘moving away’. but she never followed up on that with cole. she should have. while there were so many things she wanted to say, and a dozen more questions she wanted to ask, max plucked a four leaf clover and went with the unexpected option. tenderness. “oh cole.” a hug, “i’m so sorry.” what a horrible realization of what he’d been going through. 

suddenly, max felt very guilty about lying. 

xx.

I don't remember what they even said. Something about that stood out in his mind, almost like "they" had been feeding Max lines. He felt, deep down, like she was lying. But he dismissed it with the next drag he took. Hadn't the shrink his mom forced him to see said that it wasn't unusual to make up stories to explain away tragedy? Maybe that's what he was trying to do. "Yeah. I guess no one really knows what happened. And we just have to... be okay with that. Move on, or try to," he said, his flat tone evidence of his unbelief.

Though he barreled through her sarcastic comment, her meaning wasn't lost on her. And she wasn't wrong. God, what he wouldn't do to make fun of the selfish prick one more time without feeling the sting of loss. He watched as Max inadvertently burned herself, and he raised an eyebrow at her sudden nervousness. Signs of lying again. But his heart sank all the same at her response. There he was again, trying to explain away the tragedy. "Oh," he nodded, taking the joint back again.

He felt himself leaning away, afraid of her response if she even had one. Maybe it would be best if she didn't, then they could get sober and pretend he hadn't said what he did. That would be better than losing a friend because of a stupid need to overshare. He was surprised at the feeling of her arms around him. The understanding in her voice. Even with the circumstances, Cole felt a lightness in his stomach. Finally, someone else knew. Finally, he wasn't alone with it. His blinks were rapid-fire and he silently willed the moisture to stay behind his eyelids. "Thanks," he spoke after a long pause, his voice barely above a whisper. He tilted his head slightly towards hers, relieved for the comfort, the acceptance. "And I'm sorry too. I know it's not the same thing, but... I get it, sort of."

Cole ventured a glance at Max and his eyes fell to the four-leaf clover. A sign of good luck, ironic. "And if you ever want to talk about it, any of it, or just... remember him. I'd like that," he met her eyes again. "Might make me feel less crazy."

[Timothée Chalamet, cismale, he/him] who’s that? oh it’s [walden cole montgomery]. i hear they’re [21] and are known as [the loverboy] around [the skate park]. they’re also a [junior] at [indiana state] and a [manager] at the [music center]. they’re known to be [artistic + intellectual] and [self-involved + elusive]. some people say they remind them of [poetry whispered during a rainstorm, snide remarks from the back of the classroom, the outline of a flask in his jean pocket].

STATISTICS

FULL  NAME: walden cole montgomery GENDER/PRONOUNS: cis male; he/him AGE: twenty-one FACECLAIM: timothée chalamet BIRTHDAY: april 23 STAR  SIGN: taurus HOMETOWN: albany, new york HEIGHT:  5′10″ OCCUPATION: manager at the music center; junior at Indiana state ORIENTATION: homosexual (but not officially out)

HEADCANONS

* Cole is the half-brother of Jonathan and Will Byers (Lonnie sure got around in high school); he only found out a few years ago, right around when Will went missing and, frankly, Cole didn’t say anything because he didn’t particularly want to be tied to “Zombie Boy.” Since then, he hasn’t known how or even if he should say something. * Cole has been in love once: with Adam, the star quarterback two years his senior. For two years, they shared clandestine meetings and quiet declarations of love and whispered promises that they’d move somewhere where things could be different, where everyone could know. But then Adam changed, seemingly overnight. He avoided Cole and acted cruel and empty; Cole still doesn’t know what happened, and never will, because Adam died in the mall fire. *note: Adam was one of The Flayed, and while Cole knows something was very off, he has no idea how to find answers * Cole hasn’t been the same since Adam died. He went away to college to study Literature, which should have made him happy, but he just felt like a ghost. He’s not sure if it’s worse to be away at college pretending like nothing happened, or back in Hawkins constantly reminded of him.

PINTEREST | BIOGRAPHY | CONNECTIONS | PLAYLIST

chancecunningham​:

🍻

“in your dreams, player,” chance said with a light scoff as he plopped down into the visitor’s chair and loosely joined his hands in his lap. he took a second to inspect his classmate. cole looked pretty banged up…like aside from steve, he’d maybe gotten the worst  but still, despite being tattered and broken, cole maintained his attitude. “your sense of humor sucks. even on your…” death bed. his words trailed off before he delivered his own shitty punchline, figuring cole didn’t need to be verbally reminded of his injuries. 

chance waved off what he was going to say and quickly shifted gears to what he’d actually come to discuss once he got the okay from cole to talk. “i know you’re probably sick of hearing about this shit,” he began, clearing his throat as he leaned forward so he could be closer to cole and therefore keep his voice low, “but at the carnival…you said…something about adam dying…” a beat, “again.” 

out of all the people chance had spoken to since his sister and best friend came back from the dead, cole was the only one that had ever corroborated his reality. “did you mean like…literally?” chance asked, anxiously fidgeting with the bandage above his eye brow, “because….i….no one else remembers…except you.”

leaning back in his chair again, chance closed his eyes and let out a sigh. “i know i sound fucking crazy,” he breathed out as he shook his head slightly, “but i don’t know who else to talk to about this…my mom says it’s the devil in my fucking brain…nobody wants to hear it.” he opened his eyes slightly and peeked at cole through his lashes, “but i know this forest commune thing is bullshit…right?”

xx.

For a brief moment, Cole panicked at Chance’s use of the word ‘player.’ What did he know? Who had told him? But when the other moved on as if it was nothing, he figured it was just Chance being stupid. Cole traded grim smiles with his sort-of friend. “Death bed?” he finished for him. Truly, Cole knew he could’ve died, but it didn’t scare him like it probably should. The realization pulled his lips taut in a grim line and he felt a burning in his throat that only an ice-cold beer could soothe.

Cole wanted to flinch when Chance leaned towards him, an old habit, but he remained still, stoic. He remembered exactly what Chance was talking about-- the moment Adam’s eyes lost their shine, when he looked like he did before. For a moment, he entertained the thought of denying it, telling Chance he was being crazy. But, Chance was Adam’s best friend. He deserved to know, too.

Before he could explain, Chance’s nerves played out before him, and guilt settled within Cole’s chest at not having told him the truth before now. “Literally,” he confirmed, his voice barely louder than a whisper. “Yeah. He died, dude. And everyone knew that until... until he came back.” Cole remembered the funeral, remembered clasping Beth’s hand so tight she winced, remembered seeing Chance slip in the back with what he suspected was a flask in his suit jacket.

The cocktail of guilt and fear wrapped its fingers around Cole’s throat for a moment, forcing him into silence.  He lifted his eyes to Chance’s with a grimace and shook his head. “You’re not... crazy. I thought--” he paused, shaking his head at how stupid he’d been. “I thought if I didn’t ask questions about how he came back, it would be like before. I didn’t think... this would happen.” Running a hand through his matted curls, Cole sighed. “I’m sorry I never told you.”  He kept his head angled low, at his hands, to avoid Chance’s gaze.

Cole still hadn’t quite recovered from discovering that Family Video in Hawkins, Indiana had a copy of Maurice. That had been a few months ago, and he’d forced Max to check it out for him so they could ogle Hugh Grant together. Well, so he could ogle Hugh Grant and Max could sigh disapprovingly. Anyway, today he was on a mission to find Full Metal Jacket; some film major had told him that Kubrick was shaping up to be the ‘voice of their generation,’ or something, so Cole figured he’d give it a try.

But of course, he’d ended up wandering the entire square footage of the store. He was glancing at new releases when a familiar voice asked him a question. He hadn’t known Barb well in high school, given that she was a year above him, but he knew her as Nancy’s friend. Cole smiled warmly at her and peered around to see her options. He wasn’t much of a comedy guy, so he didn’t recognize many. “Hmmm,” he studied the shelves, then had an idea. He ducked into another aisle and came back with The Lost Boys. “It’s technically horror, but I promise it isn’t scary. Just... a cheesy vampire movie. It’s my go-to,” he said, holding the title out for her. “Other than that, I’m afraid I’m out of suggestions.” 

Where: Family Video Who: Barb & ??

Barb had become reliant on video tapes since she’d come home. She couldn’t afford anything beyond the basic cable package, and even then, the reception in the postage stamp she called an apartment wasn’t the greatest. So she’d been checking a lot of books out of the library – even more than usual – and renting plenty of video tapes. She had started out renting her favorites, like the 1978 version of Lord of the Rings, along with Grey Gardens, All the President’s Men, and One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. But in the past few weeks, she’d started to branch out. She started with political thrillers, because they were fairly familiar ground. Marathon Man, The Odessa File, Sleeping Dogs…from there she began watching action movies, like Jaws, Alien, and Star Wars: A New Hope.

Tonight, she was perusing the comedy section, which was definitely unprecedented ground for her. “Oh, shoot,” Barb muttered, as the movie she was looking at turned out to be rented already. Seeing someone out of the corner of her eye, she turned to look at them. It wasn’t like her to seek the advice of a stranger, but since she was already trying a new genre tonight – why not? “Hey, would you recommend anything?” she said, gesturing at the shelves in front of them. “These movies aren’t really my thing, so…you could really tell me any one of these is great, and I’d sort of have to believe you.”

eddiemcnson​:

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“oh.” eddie just continued to stare, stupidly, until his eyes widened, brain finally catching onto what cole had just admitted here. shit. so hawkins wasn’t as prim, proper and heterosexual as he’d been made to believe all this time. eddie licked his lips, blinked. wracking his brain on what to say next. nearly choking on his own breath when he said ‘we fucked’ and oh, his cheeks immediately lit up, stained a deep red colour. he nodded.

“so you’re….”, he trailed off, browd furrowed, giving cole a meaningful look before he dropped because shit, what else did he need, here? cole had just said he used to have a boyfriend, whom he quote unquote ‘fucked’ - or the other way around? he tried not to think about it, it was getting hard trying to concentrate as is -  what other confirmation could he possibly need to know that cole was into guys?

he didn’t miss how cole’s eyes slipped to his lips and his tongue darted out to swipe over his bottom lip. shit, why was he this flustered? getting hit on in chicago eddie usually wasn’t this squirming and blushing mess of a man. but hawkins? whole ‘nother story. not that he was totally suave in chicago, either, but at least a little more in control. here, he felt powerless. 

however, he straightened his back, took another drag. however, he thought, it didn’t need to be that way. if he pulled himself together. “oh yeah?”, he questioned, brow raised, a grin forming on his lips. “yeah? well, what if i -” and he actually couldn’t believe he was going to use a line this corny but here went nothing - “ well, what if i wanted to skip straight to dessert?”

xx.

As redness overtook Eddie’s cheeks, Cole took another drag of his cigarette. “Yes, I’m gay. You can say it,” he confirmed, his voice remaining low. Cole was sure Eddie would never out him, partially because that wasn’t Eddie’s character, and partially because of mutually assured destruction.

It was exhausting to have to keep such a large part of him a secret, and Cole was frustrated by it. Maybe that’s why he told Eddie (other than, obviously, trying to hook up with him). When Cole went to college, he was able to be himself more freely; he wasn’t out, per se, but he was much more comfortable discussing his sexuality. He wondered if Eddie had a similar experience in Chicago, and was now, like Cole, struggling to reconcile all the different parts of himself.

Cole grinned, noting the change in Eddie’s demeanor. Cole finished his cigarette and reached behind Eddie to throw it away. He brushed his arm against Eddie’s and took advantage of proximity this move afforded him. Glancing up into Eddie’s eyes, Cole’s own twinkled mischievously. “Well, that’s too easy. What about foreplay?” his voice was barely above a whisper. 

Timothée Chalamet in ‘The King’ (2019)

@mmuscles

𝐌𝐘 𝐎𝐖𝐍 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐌𝐘

WHO: max mayfield & @loverboymontgomery WHAT: after max and cole hop of their walkies, max shows up, heart to hearts are had, and the glimpses of each other in their own behaviors become abundantly apparent (aka colemax mirrors w hints of lumax and richgomery) WHERE: the montgomery residence, july 1st-ish

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