part two with reo, rin and bachira soon!!
plot: you're in a nonpublic relationship, but one gesture in particular blows your cover <3
ππ ππππππππππ ; take a look, trust me!
β sae itoshi
That you had always been attracted to impossible things was not unknown: as a child you loved unicorns, one of the most imaginative and magical creatures ever. You believed you could love even something impossible, and the same thing had more or less happened when you met your boyfriend, Sae Itoshi. Sae was something impossible, out of your reach for the simple fact that you were a very normal person when he was one of the most famous U-20 soccer players in the world and, above all, of the moment
Sae was impossible, and you had always liked the impossible. That's how you liked to tell your mother when she asked how you ended up in a relationship with him. Known for a big misunderstanding in a public laundry, for a reason still unknown to you, fate had decided that this was not the last time you would see each other
The choice had come when Sae had explicitly asked you for it: not that he was ashamed of you or anything like that, but fame brings negative things as well as positive ones. One of them was privacy. Although after years he was used to invasions of privacy even during a walk, he didn't want to ruin what had always been normality for you. So no one, other than your families and a few friends of yours, knew about you two
And so, a little over a year after you had made it official only to your families that you were together as a couple, the thing that was impossible for you was how your cover was still standing. You didn't mind being in a nonpublic relationship, in fact you found it more pleasant and intimate, but Sae was famous all over the world: you knew that sooner or later everything would collapse like a house of playing cards
And evidently that day was today
"So, who is she?" his teammate asks again, the Spanish accent thick in every word. Your fingers tighten around the handles of his sports bag, desperately searching for a way that doesn't confirm what practically everyone in the room has already assumed. 10 pairs of eyes stare at you curiously, waiting for either you or Sae to speak and make up an excuse that they can deny
The last match that ReAl had won against an equally Spanish team had ended less than an hour ago. It was Valentine's Day, and the stadium where the match was played had made VIP seats available to which only the players partners could access. The partners had a card previously given by the boyfriends which gave the possibility of walking in certain areas of the stadium, one of which was the locker room. You had remained in the popular stands for the entire match, and after the end you had decided to use your VIP pass, which Sae had given you a few days before, to go and congratulate and surprise him. You had purposely waited a full hour to get in just so all the other teammates would leave, but apparently something had been holding them back
The players didn't know you, it was a secret relationship after all. The partners who usually came to see their boyfriends knew each other, and Sae was still the only one no one had ever seen with a girl. Everything fit with the perfect fall of the cover that you had so carefully supported
"umh" you stutter embarrassed. The most damning proof you have is undoubtedly the Sae sports bag you have in your hands, which stands out for its black color instead of the white and red that ReAl uses. You take a few steps back, not knowing at all how to escape the situation, much less where Sae is, who you don't even see in the locker room. His stuff is here, his teammates are here, but where is he dammit?
"We've never eaten anyone, or at least off the field" says a boy who gets up, making the rest of his teammates laugh. You recognize him for being a braggart that Sae tells you about every now and then, who has 100 girls and every game brings a new one. You roll your eyes at the tasteless joke, trying not to let your annoyance show
"I probably went to the wrong locker room, please excuse me..." you say turning on your heel, heading towards the exit, but the boy's hand grabs your wrist just enough to make you immobilize "It's not a problem, you don't have to apologize. But I don't think you're here by mistake..." the boy says laughing cheerfully, and really, you don't understand all his humor. You try to free yourself from the grip on the wrist, but the soccer player doesn't seem to give in as he makes some of his teammates laugh with sleazy jokes
βCould you let go of my wrist?β you say trying to sound polite, but he shakes his head "We need to figure out who your boyfriend is first! Victor, is she your girlfriend?" the boy asks, making you turn towards another guy, who obviously shakes his head "Sanchez, is this yours?" he asks another again, and you can't explain why you have to suffer such humiliating treatment if you haven't actually done anything wrong
"Arion, is it your-" the boy says, but someone interrupts him "She's my girlfriend."
Everyone turns towards the voice, including you: Sae, fresh out of the shower wearing sweatpants and a simple towel around his neck, peeks out from the locker room showers. His eyes waver a little at seeing you here, surprised at the whole situation and above all not understanding how you ended up here. He tilts his head, his usual apathetic look at the boy next to you "You should let go her wrist" he says taking a few steps forward, the usual nonchalance typical of his character. "Oh! Oh, yes" says the boy, immediately pulling away, taking a few steps back. The grip on your wrist releases, easing the pressure you had built up. You breathe a sigh of relief, but at the same time remember what situation you are in: the relationship that you had covered for so long has just come to light
You look up at Sae, who you think is the least bit angry, but there isn't a shred of anger in his face, in fact, he almost seems relieved. He comes in front of you, taking his sports bag that you had in your hands "Thanks. Two minutes and we can go" he says putting it back on the floor, putting a clean t-shirt on and putting the towel back on in his black bag. You look at him embarrassed, not daring to look at any of his teammates who have remained silent in the meantime
Sae stands up, holding his bag with one hand and grabbing yours with the other, letting your palms and fingers connect "Let's go" he says, nodding his head. You leave the locker room, everyone's gaze still on you. Start walking towards the back of the stadium, heading towards the car parks dedicated to the players cars. A slight, uncomfortable silence hangs between you two, and you wonder if he's simply thinking of a way to restore everything to how it was and make your relationship nonpublic again
"It wasn't that bad anyway. You can ask your teammates to just shut up" you say, looking down, but a light squeeze on your hand makes you look up in his direction βHuh?β he asks, and you try to sound clearer "For the relationship. You can tell your classmates not to talk-" you say, but he cuts you off even before you finish "Do you want to make it nonpublic again?" he asks, and you find yourself thinking about it
Being nonpublic had never been a problem for you, you appreciated that Sae cared so much about your privacy. On the other hand, your privacy never really mattered much to you: you wanted to walk with him and hold his hand even in front of a crowd, not pretend not to know him as often happened. If being with him meant sacrificing something, you would have done so immediately and without even thinking about
βI'm actually okay with being public-β you say and at the same moment you see him sigh more calmly βWhat is it?β you ask curiously "I've been waiting a long time to ask you this. But I didn't want to seem hypocritical since I asked you to make it nonpublic" Sae says, and almost immediately you smile at his words
The impossible was something that actually often actually happened. It had happened that you got dating to the prodigy of Japan, and it was happening now when you were officially made his girlfriend for all his fans and the world
β shidou ryusei
βYou went too far as usualβ you say, rolling your eyes, albeit amused. Shidou chuckles, buttoning up the buttons that hide your chest βYou should be used to itβ he says looking up after finishing his work. You laugh softly, still amazed at how you let yourself be dragged into such a situation. But then you think about it and you understand that avoiding these situations with your boyfriend is far too difficult. Shidou cups your face in his hands, tilting your head slightly to look at his beautiful work: two red and purple marks stand out from many other small ones. He observes them with a certain pride, stroking the bite mark he left on you with his thumb
βI don't think this was the break the director intendedβ you say, walking towards the door, reluctantly releasing the grip Shidou had. You hear him murmuring something, but you don't pay attention to it as you brush your hair to the side, leaving the hickeys on your neck visible: you have to walk in an empty corridor and you're hot, so you're not at risk. You place your hand on the doorknob, headed to exit and return to the car, but you are petrified when the entire corridor turns out to be filled with journalists
You stand there, motionless, and Shidou appears behind you, also intending to leave. He stands still, but less shocked, a few steps behind you. Everyone turns in your direction, and an awkward silence hangs in the narrow space delimited by the walls. Many, if not all, notice the red marks on your neck and there are more than a few surprised expressions. Some cameras turn towards you, some journalists take their microphones in case the situation requires them
And you immediately regret having, for the umpteenth time, indulged Shidou's shitty ideas. You knew you had to wait for him in the car so that he could go home with you at the end of the interview, but his messages had convinced you that there was no harm in sneaking out for a few minutes. While you were waiting he had sent you messages telling you that his interview was late and that the director had advised him to go to a private room to relax before his shift. He had asked you to come in to keep him company, that you could sneak in for a few minutes since the corridors were empty, and that he simply needed you. And so you found yourself against the wall with your boyfriend's lips on your neck, killing time until his interview
But evidently something had gone wrong with the program in mind, because now you had more than 100 journalists waiting their turn and now they had a front page story. You and him had been together for a while, and the agreement between you was to keep your relationship nonpublic for a while because the media often went heavy on their idols partners
But the cover seemed to have been blown
"Shidou, Shidou Ryusei? With a mysterious girl?" says a journalist, directing the microphone at you "The king of the penalty area with a woman?" someone else says, and from then on you just hear everyone else making up name after name as they try to get some information out of you two
"Holy shit" you whisper to yourself, covering your hickeys with your hair, even though everyone has noticed them by now. You die of embarrassment at all these eyes staring at you, and the best option at the moment seems to be going back into the room and hoping that this is all just a trick your mind is playing on you. You knew that sooner or later you would make it official, but you didn't think this way and especially with you in these conditions. It all looked perfectly like the most colossal figure of shit the human lifeform had ever seen in this shitty life
You look for Shidou, but when you turn you can't find him anymore. You wonder if he seriously followed the advice to go back to the room and hope it's all a dream, but you know that's not your man's style: instead you feel your shoulders surrounded by his arm, which promptly squeezes you to the point of keeping you by your side alongside. You turn towards him, and on his face you notice that his usual smirk that never leads to anything good. Something's about to explode
"Ladies, gentlemen! One at a time, please" he says loudly, and the attention they previously had on you shifts to him, who has always dominated the scene better in a frighteningly natural way "This racket for WHAT? Two red marks? You've never seen worse, then" he says, and as you thought his joke provokes a small laugh from everyone
The journalists try to get the best place in front of you, and perplexed you turn to Shidou "Don't do anything I might regret" you say almost in a whisper, but he grins "Let me do it, babe. I tied them to my finger like fish to a fishing line" he says confidently, and it's his confidence that worries you. Some journalist raises the microphone, firing off questions that you don't even understand because of the speed. Shidou still doesn't understand them, and after several attempts he gives up; he waves his hand, moving the microphones away
"I thought I would talk today about my relationship with the beautiful girl in question here, but evidently the scoop will go to you and not to the agency we are in" he says dramatically, as if he actually regretted giving information to others. "What did you want to do?" you whisper perplexed, not knowing that his goal today was to make it official anyway. Shidou turns to you, grabs your waist and bends your back, his chest smeared against his βMedia, meet my fucking beloved girlfriend!β he says, kissing you. Confused, you don't know how to react, but shortly after you give in and respond to the kiss, placing your hand against his face. The journalists explode, the cameras start filming and broadcasting. It's an understatement that you have shocked the media for at least the next few days, but with Shidou in the end everything is unpredictable and without explosions
It wasn't the way you expected to make it official, but as long as it works it's fine, right?
β micheal kaiser
The subtle smell of french fries hung in the air, mixing with the light air that resonated in the club. Everyone's chatting made the evening pleasant, which actually seemed to go too well
Hamburg was huge as a city, Ness himself recognized it, yet he had lived there for a good part of his life before moving to Berlin on the campus of Bastard Munchen. You had been here a few other times, and you had fallen in love with the small and cute clubs that the city offered
When you returned to the hotel room with Kaiser you had begged him to go out tonight, since you had arrived you had spent all your time at training or at the match, which had ended with the victory of the German team. And Kaiser has little chance of telling you no, it's something he just can't do: so, a few hours later, you and other team members found yourself in a club celebrating the victory. Sitting next to him you were calm, after all he was your boyfriend and his team knew about you two, unlike the rest of the world. However, being in a public place the only affectionate gesture you could allow yourself was his hand on your thigh, covered by the table and which no stranger could see
Everything was going well: Bastard Munchen had won today, tomorrow morning you would return home and take a few days break from being the team manager. Everything was perfect
But obviously perfection, even if sweated with difficulty and attention, does not last long
You were chatting with a team member when, from afar, you noticed a group of guys watching you. It was nothing new, the players were famous and you were also quite well known thanks to your role in the team. Kaiser notices the same thing, tilting his face towards the small crowd "You're wanted" you say jokingly, and he snorts in a mock annoyed way: you know how much he actually loves this attention from fans, which feeds his big ego. The guys step forward, followed by others and yet others, until the table is surrounded by all the guys shyly asking for an autograph or a photo
The group, made up of a girl and two boys, approaches Kaiser asking to take a photo. He accepts, reluctantly lifting the contact of his hand on your thigh, and you can read his slight annoyance in his cerulean eyes. You giggle a little at seeing him annoyed, but you don't let it show
Then, the dinner that was supposed to be quiet and a way to spend time with your boyfriend turns out to be yet another time when public life comes before private life; it doesn't make you sad though, because seeing Kaiser happy while talking to his fans makes you happy too
You stay to eat your chips and chat with Ness, who unlike Kaiser only had to sign a few quick autographs, and every now and then you glance at Kaiser who stayed behind to talk to the group of people. You notice how completely comfortable he seems, so you don't worry
But then something reaches your ear
"We are moving to another club to spend the rest of the night, would you join us?" a boy says, and the rest of the group nods. Kaiser is used to these somewhat sudden questions, fans often cross the line almost without wanting to "I can't guys. The team is celebrating together tonight" he says playing with a lock of his blue hair, and you try to be indiscreet in listening to the conversation
"What a shame..." says a boy, and Kaiser chuckles "I know guys. Maybe next time" he says, and he seems about to go back to the table, when the girl stops him by taking a few steps forward "Or maybe there's is it a girl you're waiting for?" the woman asks, and you immediately turn towards their direction, trying not to cough up what's in your mouth for the surprise
You see Kaiser a little perplexed, you notice it from the way he tilts his head trying to come up with an excuse that seems convincing "Maybe. But I shouldn't tell you, guys" he says, and this time you're the one who's perplexed
You see him turn towards you, just enough to give you a brief wink that you notice all too well. You pretend like you didn't see him, turning away, but you really don't understand where he's going with his speech. You've been together for quite a while and it's always been confidential for a matter of convenience, being nonpublic you had many pros but at the same time many cons. And at the time you had never talked about making it public, as much as you actually wanted to be like this
"Really? Are you in a relationship?" the boy asks, and Kaiser smiles satisfied "I don't know. Do you think I have it?" he asks, and everyone immediately nods "There are rumors that you are dating the German model who is always on the front page of Vogue" says one, but the other corrects him "What are you saying! He could be dating the girl he was spotted with last week passed in front of the city's cathedral" says the other, and you see in Kaiser's gaze an amusement you've never seen before. You nervously bite your nail, not knowing what he's doing and above all why he didn't complete the conversion a few minutes ago. What the fuck is going on?
"You're both wrong! The rumors all agree that he's dating the manager of Bastard Munchen, have you seen how they look at each other? Or how she's always the first one he greets when the players take the field?" says the girl very convinced, placing her hands on her waist
It is at that moment when all your beliefs fall away. You thought you hadn't made the situation so obvious, but evidently you failed
You turn towards them again, trying to hide the blush that you now know has taken up residence on your cheeks. Kaiser claps his hands happily "Right! I'm waiting for her" he says, and everyone in the group's jaw drops "Are you serious? Are you seriously with the manager?" the boy asks, and he nods. You notice too late how the girl, peeking out from Kaiser's figure, has noticed you: you hide your face by looking down, but it's too late now
"But she's here!" the girl says, and Kaiser rolls his eyes as if he hadn't noticed you βI know. My girlfriend, yu-hu Y/n!β he says, raising his hand to greet you as if he hadn't just dropped a bombshell on a mere group of fans. You raise your face trying to look as calm as possible, as if everything is actually normal and your heart isn't going 100 times faster than normal. Kaiser comes closer, sitting next to you again and putting his arm around your shoulders, while the group looks at you surprised but happy "I don't like to keep my girlfriend waiting, guys. Have a good evening though!" he says, cuddling while you are literally trying not to start screaming
The guys nod, both saying goodbye and thanking Kaiser for his time. When they leave, you turn to him with the reddest face ever "What did you just do?!" you ask in surprise, but with his free hand he caresses your arm, making slow and gentle movements "Doing what I should have done a long time ago. Isn't it better this way, Schatz?" he asks. You suppress the urge to insult him, because the truth is, you too would have liked to make it official a long time ago
βDo you know that now you will have to confirm this to the whole world and not just to one group?β you ask with a sigh, relaxing the nerves that have been on edge for minutes. He smirks, nodding as he grabs his phone βI've had a post ready on Instagram for a while. It's been in the drafts for a long time, how about I post it now?β he asks, and you curse yourself for never being able to be mad at him
You both had each other's fingers tied, it was too obvious by now. Maybe it really was time to share your love with the world and not just with the team, as it has been until now
Genre: hurt/comfort
Warnings: Crying, fear of abandonment
A/n: just wrote this on a whim, enjoy your day/night everyone <3
"Promise me you won't leave" your whispered
"Wha..t where is this coming from? "Β
You smiled, your gaze trained on the palms of your hands. He knew you were lifting your mask to your face, so the way your eyes don't crinkle at the edges made him uneasy. Your indefinite Silence only made it worse.Β
His eyes caught the sight of tears falling onto your hands, followed by your shoulders quivering. He caressed your jaw to guide your gaze to him, and the sight broke him. Tears welled at the seams, trying their best to stay put but failing, the same concerning smile on your face. "What's wrong?" his voice soft as his touch. "I'm scared I'll lose you" you confessed, your hands trembling at the thought.Β
"Oh Y/n, don't say that. You don't have to worry about that", he wiped your tears with his thumb and brushed the strands of hair off your face. "I'll always be here" he smiled
It was all crashing onto you that you lost so much throughout your life and the thought of losing someone that inspired you to keep going terrified you. But seeing his smile grounded you, fate can be merciless at times but if he's with you smiling then perhaps things will be okayΒ
You felt him pull you into his embrace, the cozy warmth he radiated soothed the pain. And tears sprung out at the love he showered you with, while his words only seemed to further bring you at ease.
"You're not alone"Β
demo of all time
β heaven is my baby, suicide's her father, opulence is the end. β - lana del rey.
various! yandere! honkai star rail men on how they claim you ~
π I just wanted to make a little post which features my favorite male HSR characters lolz. Also, there's zero reason why I picked the song for the title other than the fact that it is for the β¨ aesthetic β¨!
β₯ ππππ ππππ !
What better way than to leave a mark on his beloved than by his mere presence alone? Jing Yuan is a simple man in his core, even if his tactical nature or even mischievous side can get carried away at times, The General is all too aware of his influence on the Lofu.
The sun could stop shining, the sky could fall and darkness could envelop the whole galaxy but not even that could erase the impact that Jing Yuan has left on you.
Wandering eyes follow you everywhere you go, quaint whispers have become a daily occurrence for you as the entirety of the Lofu knows who you lover is. Some praise and envy your position as The General is known to be handsome, kind and strong. They secretly spit at you and curse your very existence, nasty jealousy rotting them to their core as you march on like a solider to war, aimless and uncertain.
There is also of course the opposite end of the spectrum - adoring fans who just gush about your so called relationship with the dashing general. Hours are wasted scrolling away on your phone as you browse through the endless sea of lovey dovey articles, pictures taken you weren't even aware of that existed, and a plethora of other things you could even bother to remember.
All he needed to do was to just give you a nice golden collar to seal the deal. At least that would be the more obvious way of him trying to brand you as his own sweetheart.
He had his own little secret though. A velvet box was kept hidden away in his desk, ready to be opened on a special occasion.
Depending on how you got on with the general in the future, the little thing in the box was either going to make you the happiest person in the world or, he really would finally shackle you with gold.
β₯ ππππππ !
Sunday, ever the gentleman, would try to remain subtle about his feelings towards you in public. There are just some things that you do not do, nor share with the outside world.
This is a rule he always tells you to follow.
Still, all he needs to do is to speak. Honeyed words fall from his lips like candy, always so sweet, so addictive, so passionate. Even a man like Sunday, who is known for keeping his cool, cannot hide his infatuation with you. He rambles and rambles, sometimes even losing himself in his thoughts as he sings his praises for you, like the lovesick fool that he is.
Sunday likes to think that he is being cool, suave, but he is literally anything but.
Sometimes, he gets a little too carried away. Sometimes, his darker desires get the better of him, which can set you off a little. He's always so sweet and apologetic whenever he upsets you...
Please, he says through gritted teeth.
Don't mind my ramblings. They don't mean anything. Truly, they do not.
Disregard those pleas entirely as they are nothing but hollow. All one needs to do is to look into his crazed eyes, and that is where you will find out just how true everything he's saying really is.
β₯ πππππππ !
This sly fox has such a hard time keeping his hands to himself... In all honesty, can you even blame him? Whenever he sneaks up on you, Jiaoqiu cannot help but to place his hands literally anywhere on your soft body and he is not shy about showing his true feelings.
Bearing his pearly white fangs, Jiaoqiu likes to bite from time to time.
The desire to do so is further enhanced with every sweet noise you make. Now now, don't cover your mouth, be nice! Every squeal, sigh, groan, even scream are so precious to him... Don't deny him the pleasure of not being able to listen to you.
It's very cruel of you, he says with a pout.
In the cover of night, he likes to trace the markings he left on you with his tongue, maybe even adding even more marks in the process. If you bleed a little, it's all fine and dandy.
You always taste sweet to him.
And the thought of other people being able to see the red bruises which bloom into hideous purple in green bruises on your neck... My goodness, he thinks to himself.
He could just devour you whole.
(Y/n) spotted him walking towards her, her weaken state trembling under his gaze, Childe was behind him, arms crossed.
She kneeled infront of him, her legs shaking as she tried to keep the blood that filled her mouth inside.
"M-my lord" The girl spoke weakily, her tounge rolled up to contain the red liquid, but her teeth gave it away.
"Stand up, soldier" he demands with a cold gaze, totally clueless.
Childe sees right through her act tho, he watches her try to not faint infront of both of them from the pain, he notices the way her once pearl white teeth are stained with blood, and he glares at the hand holding her stomach, but her act was pretty good, not flinching, not shaking while one knee stood on the ground.
"I can't, i'm sorry my lord" (Y/n) apologizes, keeping her stotic facade on, her eyes dark red. Fury, or pain.
Scaramouche tch'd.
"Why aren't you obeying, you little slut"
Childe held an arm in front of the man, and walked fowards.
"(Y/n), lift up your shirt"
Panic crossed her eyes, but soon it dissapared like mist, biting her lip slightly.
"Sir, i-"
Childe made a bold move, took her by her forearms and lifted her up with ease, like she was a feather, while one hand kept her standing, the other one went for the black fabric of her fitted shirt, lifting it up, to see the injury.
Childe gasped, someone had pierced some type of weapon through the girl's stomach, almost letting her internal organs spill out.
"(Y/n)..."
She pushed him away, and fell to the cold floor, her eyes loosing the shine they usually held.
"I'm sorry my lord, i couldn't-"
"Shut up, Tartaglia, go get her some type of paramedics or something!"
Soon, the tall man was gone.
Her eyes widened as she watched as he fell to his knees infront of her.
"Who did this to you?!"
"It isn't important"
He slapped her, hard, making her stumble backwards, but he caught her wrist and lantched her to his chest.
"It is important, i'm gonna break all the bones of their bodies and beat them up with my own fist, to then-"
"Scaramouche, please" she begged, gripping the cloth of his armour tightly into her tiny fists, her wound long forgotten.
"You'll be ok, (Y/n), you've always been ok, you'll be back, you'll recover, like you always do"
The girl shook her head and smiled sadly, tears spilling down her cheeks and under her throat.
"I don't think so, my lord"
She looks at him like the fire in her eyes has been dowsed with ice water, if anything it makes the red more pale. He's not used to it, it unnerves him. He wants her to give freely like she always does but she won't. It's like she just crawled right back inside some invisible shell and no matter how hard he tries she's unreachable. She moves her eyes more slowly, like they're heavy, an effort to move. Scaramouche wants to crack a joke but he knows she doesn't have the enegry to laugh. He's kneeling right next to her but she might as well be on heaven.
She stops moving all of the sudden, her half-lidded eyes closing.
"Don't fucking close your eyes, you hear me?!"
Silence
"Soldier!"
Silence
"Soldier!"
Silence once again.
"(Y-y/n)?
He was trying to fight a rising panic, his heart leaping on his throat, uneasy, he was fucking terrified for god's sake.
He, the mighty Scaramouche was scared senslessly, his arms trembling as he shook the girl's limp form desperatly.
"Please"
He neared his ear to her chest, not hearing her heartbeates anymore.
She wasn't breathing.
"PLEASE!"
And with that, all the humanity he had left died with her, his precious soldier, his secret lover, his soon-to-be wife.
"And what does that make me, my lord?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. Sukuna looked at you again, his smirk returning but softer this time, almost wistful. "It makes you the only one who matters. Out of everyone, every woman in these lands. You are the only one that matters above them. Behind me.β And behind that, behind Hiromi. You whisper in your head.
GENRE: alternate universe - heian era;
WARNING/S: nsfw, angst, one sided romance, conflicted feelings, hurt/no comfort, unhappy marriage, forced parenthood, hurt, physical touch, character death, mourning, loneliness, pain, conflicted relationship, emotional distress, grief, toxic relationship, depiction of suicide, depiction of suicidal ideation, depiction of one-sided relationship, depiction of grief, depiction of complicated relationship, depiction of parenthood, depiction of canon related violence, depiction of loneliness, mention of grief, mention of illness, mention of loneliness, heian! sukuna, long suffering concubine! reader;
WORD COUNT: 20k words
NOTE: when i was writing this, i thought it wouldn't be this long. but when i ended up writing more and more, i just couldn't stop. i ended up writing this as a sort of prequel to the other woman's latter parts. if people are aware of me from other websites or just here, you know i write a lot. this 20k usually was my usual writing. but i feel like people like a lot of short stories. i'll post about that some time else. i'm gonna be sorry for breaking more of your hearts like this. the reason this took so long as me drafting multiple times. and then my exams. so, it just...this will be a read. anyway, i love you guys!!! thank you for your birthday wishes. see you later <3
masterlist
if you want to, tip! <3
YOU COULD FEEL THE YEARS IN YOUR BONES. You had been Ryomen Sukunaβs concubine for nearly ten years, a role that once filled you with dread and uncertainty. Over time, however, the nature of your relationship shifted. Unlike the others who served him out of fear or obligation, you had managed to carve out a space for yourself in his worldβone of strange but growing trust.
It wasn't love, at least not for you, but it was something. Ryomen Sukuna treated you differently from the others. He sought your company more often, and the violent edge in his voice seemed to soften when he addressed you.
What set you apart wasnβt just your demeanor or willingness to adaptβit was your face, the way you looked almost identical to Ryomen Hiromi, the only woman your husband Sukuna had ever loved.
At first, you didnβt know why he lingered in your presence or why his temper cooled when you were near. It was only after overhearing a conversation between two of his most trusted advisors that you realized the truth. You looked just like herβthe woman whose memory still haunted him. You had become a ghost of his past, a stand-in for the love he had lost long ago.
As the years passed, you began to understand Sukuna in ways no one else could. He never spoke of Ryomen Hiromi to you, but in quiet moments, you saw the flicker of something softer in his gaze.
Perhaps he found comfort in your presence because you reminded him of her. Or maybe, in some twisted way, he had come to care for youβnot as the woman you were, but as the reflection of someone long gone.
Even so, you knew where you stood. You were the favored concubine, yes, but the specter of Ryomen Hiromi loomed between you, casting a shadow over every fleeting moment of tenderness. You were not her, and you never would be. But in this cruel, tangled relationship, you had become the closest thing Sukuna allowed himself to care for.
You had long since come to terms with your place in Sukuna's world, understanding that his affection for you wasnβt truly yours. Still, it made life easier, gave you a strange sort of power in a place where others lived and died on his whims.
Once in a blue moon, sometimes, you both sat together for dinner. It was a rare occasion, that was for sure. Ryomen Sukuna often eats alone, served by his most loyal servant Uraume. But there were times when he would ask you to join him. It was often late at night, Sukuna didn't sleep well. You doubt he ever does.Β
As the sun set and the air turned cool that night, Uraume had come to your chambers and told you that Sukuna summoned you to his chambers to sup with him. You were surprised. But you immediately dressed with the help of your servants and as soon as the last of your satin ribbons were tied to your hair, you rushed out towards his chambers.
When you had arrived, the servants had been tense. It is usually like that when your lord Sukuna does not get what he wants. You apologized to them quietly, as quietly as possible for your lord husband not to hear. You would rather not have him do so. He does not like anyone, anything he owns lower themselves. You told them to leave, to go away. You would rather that it be you in that room alone with him. It would be easier.Β Β
It was one of those rare moments where he wasnβt looking to dominate or torment. Instead, he seemed pensive, sitting by the window, staring out at the horizon. Trays of food were scattered with luxurious food and luxurious ceramic tiles of alcohol. It was not for your husband. He does not need such sustenance.
It was for you, even with your small appetite. You could feel a bile rip through your throat. You purse your lips, walking inside the room and slowly lowering yourself, to bow. His crimson eyes flickered to you as you entered, and the smallest of smirks tugged at his lips.Β
βYou're late, little one.β he said, his voice deep and teasing, though there was no real malice in it.
"I was making sure I looked presentable, my lord." you replied calmly, accustomed to his games. "I didn't think you'd appreciate rushing in disarray with your servant.β
He chuckled, low and dangerous, but you had learned to discern when that sound held genuine amusement. He urges you forward from your bowing position and you stand up, moving towards him and sitting on the silk pillow as gracefully as you could.
"You always did know how to play the part. Perhaps that's why I tolerate you more than the others."
You sat across from him, not too close, but not far enough to seem distant. "Or perhaps it's because I remind you of her."
At this, his expression shifted. His eyes darkened, and for a moment, you thought you had overstepped. But instead of lashing out, Sukuna leaned back in his chair, his gaze unwavering on you. You looked over the meal and started to plate for your husband, even if he does not eat it. And then yourself. You slowly moved your sleeve away, carefully as you took the alcoholic beverage and started pouring it upon silver cups, first for him and then on your own.Β
"You think you're clever, little one?" he said, his tone neutral, betraying nothing. "But tell me... do you believe thatβs all you are to me? A ghost of someone who no longer exists?"
It was a question you had pondered many nights alone in your chambers, alone and cold, unable to sleep whatsoever. You wanted to believe that over the years, you had carved out a space of your own in his cold heart, but the truth was undeniable. You were Ryomen Hiromiβs echo, the closest thing he would allow himself to love again. But how much of you, the real you, did he see?
"I donβt pretend to know what goes on in your mind, my lord." you said carefully, holding his gaze. "But I know I am not her. And I know you donβt care for me the way you cared for her."
Silence hung heavy between you. Sukuna's eyes, burning with something unreadable, bore into yours before he spoke again, softer than usual. He uncharacteristically lets his hand move towards the table and slowly takes one of the silver cups full of sake and raises it to his lips. He downs it slowly, letting the cool smooth taste echoes on his throat.
"You're right, little one." he admitted, surprising you. "You're not her. You never will be. Best remember it, hm?"
His words were sharp, meant to cut, but they didn't sting the way they once might have. You were used to those words. And so you do not speak. You let him say what he does and slowly let yourself consume the warm flavorful broth.
Sukuna looks towards you once more, watching you eat some meat. Silence echoes through the room. Instead, they hung in the air like a truth neither of you could avoid. And yet, as he turned his gaze back toward the setting sun, his voice grew quieter.
"But you're the only one who's come close."
It wasnβt an admission of love or devotionβyou already know that your lord Sukuna wasnβt capable of that, not anymore. You were used to it. And yet, even if it was something you were used to it β you were still pained by it. But it was the closest you would ever get to understanding his complicated feelings for you. It was all that was left in his pitch black heart that never belonged to Ryomen Hiromi. You swallowed the last of the meat.
"And what does that make me, my lord?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
Sukuna looked at you again, his smirk returning but softer this time, almost wistful. "It makes you the only one who matters. Out of everyone, every woman in these lands. You are the only one that matters above them. Behind me.β
And behind that, behind Hiromi. You whisper in your head.
He rose from his seat, approaching you with the predatory grace that always reminded you of the monster he truly was. He cupped your chin, tilting your face up toward him, his thumb brushing lightly against your skin. You could feel your breath hitch hotly as his gaze burned your own. You purse your lips, trying to maintain control of yourself.
"But never forget, little one." Sukuna continued, his tone dropping. "You are here because I allow it. You may remind me of her, but you are still mine to control."
You held his gaze, unflinching. "I havenβt forgotten, my lord."
For a moment, the two of you remained like that for a moment. It was as though you were both locked in a silent struggle of power, emotion, and unspoken understanding. Even after ten years, it was just that way. Finally, Sukuna released you, stepping back as though the moment had never happened.
"Good." he said, turning away once more. "Now leave me for the night, little one. Iβve had enough of this sentimental nonsense for one night."
You nodded at him. You drank the last cup of alcohol and let the bitterness burn you. Soon after, you rose without a word, bowing slightly before you made your way to the door. Just before you left, you paused, glancing back at him one last time.
"I wish you a good night, my lord."
He didnβt respond, his attention already back on the horizon. But as you left, you couldn't help but wonder if somewhere, buried deep within him, there was more to his feelings than even he understood.
THE PEOPLE OF HIDA VIEWED YOUR HUSBAND LIKE A GOD. They always have, for as long as you could remember. The grand hall of Ryomen Sukunaβs temple buzzed with the presence of those who had come from all corners of Hida.
The heavy doors swung open to let in petitioners, men and women alike, who approached with heads bowed low, their faces masked with fear or desperation. Some came seeking mercy, others with requests for blessings or favors only Sukuna could grant.
They dared not meet his eyes as they offered up their pleas, knowing that their fates rested on the whims of the man seated high upon the throne.
And there you sat, just below him, on a fine mahogany chair that had been made specifically for you, a symbol of your status within the temple. The carved wood was smooth beneath your fingers, but no amount of comfort could erase the tension simmering beneath your skin.
Sukuna's gaze swept across the crowd with indifference, his presence towering over all as his blood-streaked eyes flickered lazily between the petitioners. You could feel the immense weight of his power bearing down on the room, as though his very presence could crush anyone at will.
But what irked you the most wasnβt the groveling or the constant fear that filled this place. No, it was her.
Directly in front of you, standing tall in the center of the hall, was the statue of Ryomen Hiromi. The woman who had haunted you from the moment you became Sukuna's concubine. The resemblance between you and her was strikingβuncannily so.
The cold, lifelike stone eyes stared straight ahead, almost as if they were judging you, just as she had judged countless others. The figure of Hiromi was positioned so that it faced not just Sukuna, but you as well, creating an eerie sense of being under constant scrutiny. Her hands, carved with impeccable precision, reached out in a serene pose, like a goddess looking down on humanity.
It was not just this one statue, either. There were others scattered throughout the templeβstatues, paintings, carvingsβeach one depicting Hiromi in a different light. She was revered here, just as much as Sukuna himself.
The woman Sukuna loved most, the woman you could never truly become, was enshrined in every corner of his temple. Her image lingered like a ghost, haunting you, reminding you that no matter how close you sat to his throne, you would always be second to her.
Sukunaβs voice echoed in the chamber, deep and commanding, as he passed judgment on the next petitioner, his words casual as if human lives were merely tokens to him. You barely listened, too distracted by the sensation of Hiromiβs stone eyes watching you, bored at you with those haunting eyes..
You couldnβt escape her. Not here. Not ever.
Your eyes drifted from the petitioner at Sukuna's feet back to the statue, a chill crawling down your spine. It was too perfect. The way it captured her beauty, her serene expression, the very essence of what made her Ryomen Hiromiβeverything that made her more than just a memory for Sukuna.
You wondered, in your darkest moments, whether Sukuna had commissioned these statues himself, making sure they were as accurate as possible, preserving every detail of the woman he loved more than life itself.
The thought gnawed at you.
The crowd shifted again, and you could hear the low murmurs of the people waiting for their turn to kneel before Sukuna. A faint breeze from the templeβs high windows stirred the air, and the faint sound of bells chimed in the distance.
And still, the statue stood, unwavering, staring at you with those lifeless eyes. It was as if Ryomen Hiromi had never left, as if she lingered between this world and the next, a permanent fixture in Sukunaβs heart, never allowing you to forget that you were only here because of her.
βNext.β Sukunaβs voice boomed, pulling you from your thoughts.
Another petitioner shuffled forward, trembling as they knelt. Sukuna watched them with a bored expression, waiting for them to speak.
You didnβt look at him. Instead, your gaze flickered back to the statueβalways back to her. She was everywhere. No matter where you turned in this temple, in this life with Sukuna, Ryomen Hiromi was there.
Her presence was eternal, and it was driving you mad.
It wasnβt as if you truly hated Ryomen Hiromi. How could you hate someone you had never met, someone who existed only in the memories of others and in the cold, flawless statues that filled this temple? No, hatred wasnβt the right word. But her presenceβher haunting, ever-present likenessβgnawed at you in ways that went deeper than resentment. It was painful.
Painful because every time you looked at her, it reminded you that you would never truly be seen for who you were. Sukunaβs gaze might fall on you often, but you knew the truth. He wasnβt looking at youβhe was seeing her. You were a reflection, an echo of the only woman he had ever truly loved. And that knowledge burns inside you, slowly and constantly.
The way her statues were placed, almost reverent, made it clear just how important she was. To the people of this land, Ryomen Hiromi was no less a god than Sukuna himself. Her beauty, her grace, her presenceβimmortalized in stoneβbecame a legend, a tale passed down from generation to generation. And you? You were simply the woman who bore her face, destined to be a stand-in for a love long lost.
You couldnβt escape it.
Even now, as you sat in that carefully crafted chair below Sukunaβs throne, the image of Hiromi loomed over you. Her delicate features seemed to accuse you, her eyes hollow but full of judgment. It was as if she were silently asking: Why are you here? Why are you in this temple, sitting at his feet, when you could never be me?
Your fingers tightened on the armrests, a subtle but instinctive reaction to the thoughts swirling in your mind. You knew it wasnβt logical to be angry at a statueβat a dead woman whose only crime was being loved by Sukunaβbut the feeling still crept in. You had no reason to despise her, but the weight of constantly living in her shadow was suffocating.
Another plea for mercy echoed through the hall, but you barely registered it. Sukunaβs voice was deep, dismissive as he granted or denied requests with a wave of his hand. This was his world, and Hiromi was as much a part of it as you were. More, even. She had her place in his heart, in his temple, in the minds of the people who worshiped them both.
But where was your place? Were you always to be nothing more than a reflection, someone to remind him of what he had lost? And what pained you more was that even after nearly ten years by his side, you hadnβt found an answer to that question. Sukuna had grown accustomed to you, perhaps even fond of you, but you knew that in the deepest recesses of his heart, it was Hiromiβs memory that still held sway.
It hurt in ways you couldnβt explain.
You werenβt her. And no matter how long you stayed by Sukunaβs side, no matter how much you tried to understand him, to navigate the storm of his power and wrath, you could never be her.
A quiet sigh escaped your lips as you lowered your gaze, away from the statue, away from the memory that plagued you. The hall was filled with voices, but none of them reached you. Sukunaβs voice, sharp and dismissive, barely registered in your ears.
The weight of Hiromiβs existence pressed down on you, heavier than the stone statues that surrounded you, more oppressive than the walls of the temple that bore her likeness in every corner. For a moment, you allowed yourself to wonderβa dangerous, fleeting thoughtβwhat would it have been like if she had never existed?
If Ryomen Hiromi had never crossed Sukunaβs path, never claimed the part of his heart that was now lost to time, would his gaze fall upon you differently? Would he see you, truly, and not the pale reflection of the woman he had loved so deeply? Could you have been someone significant to him in your own right, not simply because of your resemblance to her?
The thought lingered, bittersweet, filling you with a longing you barely allowed yourself to acknowledge. It was tempting, imagining a world where Hiromi had never been. Where you, instead of living in her shadow, might have been the first to carve a place in Sukunaβs heart, the one to leave an indelible mark on his soul.
But it was a foolish thought, and you knew it.
Hiromi had shaped him. Her loveβor perhaps the memory of herβhad molded him into the man he was now. She wasnβt just a figure of the past. She was the cornerstone of this entire existence, the silent foundation upon which Sukuna had built his empire, his throne, his identity.
The cold stone likeness of her didnβt just haunt this templeβit haunted Sukunaβs very being. It influenced his every thought, his every action, even the way he looked at you.
You werenβt just living in her shadow. You were her shadow, a reflection of something he could never truly let go of. And no matter what you did, no matter how close you came to him, you would always be caught between the person you were and the ghost of Hiromi.
And the worst part? You couldnβt hate her. Not really.
You wanted to. In those quiet, agonizing moments when you felt Sukunaβs eyes on you, knowing he was searching for traces of her in your face, you wanted to hate Hiromi with all your being. But how could you? She had been everything to him. Her love had meant something so profound that even in death, she lingered, casting her long shadow over the living. Her presence was woven into the very fabric of Sukunaβs existence.
But more than that, you owed her everything. Without Hiromi, without the love that had marked Sukuna so deeply, would he have ever taken notice of you at all? Would he have seen something in your face, something in your eyes that reminded him of the one woman he had ever loved?
Without Hiromi, you might not even be here. Her memory had brought you into his life, kept you by his side for nearly ten years. The recognition that you shared her likeness had made you his favorite, the one concubine who had stayed when so many others had come and gone. In some twisted way, Hiromi had paved the path that led you to this place, to this seat below his throne, to the strange, fragile bond you now shared with him.
But living in her shadowβit was a torment all its own.
Every statue, every carving, every whispered prayer to her image reminded you that no matter how close you came to Sukuna, you were not her. And you never would be. The affection he might show you was born not out of love for you, but out of a love that had long since died with Hiromi. You were the echo of something that had ended, a reflection of a life he had lost.
It was a strange, agonizing paradox. Without Hiromi, you would have nothing, no connection to Sukuna at all. But because of her, you would also never have everything. You could never be the woman he truly loved, no matter how long you stayed at his side.
And so, you sat there, beneath Sukunaβs throne, as the statue of Hiromi looked down on you with cold, indifferent eyes, her presence an inescapable reminder of the role you played in his life.
A role you hadnβt chosen, but one you were bound to, for as long as Sukuna wished it.
You snap back to the present as Sukunaβs deep voice rumbles through the hall, breaking through your swirling thoughts. βWhat do you think?β he asks, his gaze shifting from the kneeling man before him to you. His expression is unreadable, cold and calculating, as always, though thereβs an edge of curiosity in his tone.
You blink, focusing on the man who trembles at Sukunaβs feet, eyes downcast, waiting for his judgment. The hall, filled with the murmurs of the petitioners, goes quiet in anticipation.
βWhat is his crime?β you ask, your voice calm, though you feel the weight of Sukunaβs gaze on you.
βHe stole, little one.β Sukuna replies, a hint of amusement creeping into his voice as if daring you to suggest otherwise. βFrom one of my temples.β
You sigh softly, leaning back in your chair, your eyes narrowing slightly as you assess the man. His clothes are tattered, his hands dirty and wornβclearly a sign of the hard times that have plagued the land recently. The famine had hit Hida hard this year. Crops had failed, and many of the people were barely surviving, struggling just to feed their families.
βThe famine has been hard on all, my lord.β you say quietly, though thereβs an edge of empathy in your words. You werenβt excusing the man, but you understood the desperation that drove people to do things they wouldnβt have otherwise done. Hunger was a cruel master, and youβd seen its effects firsthand in the villages.
βThat does not mean he is entitled to steal, little one.β Sukuna counters, his tone sharp, though he doesnβt seem angryβmore like heβs making a point. βThere needs to be justice.β
You purse your lips, knowing Sukunaβs sense of justice could be harsh, final, and unyielding. He ruled with an iron fist, and mercy was not something he granted easily. But you also knew he valued your opinion, at least in his own little ways. After all, you were the one concubine whose voice he truly listened to.
βThen chain him to me, my lord.β you say, your words surprising even yourself. You sit up straighter, meeting Sukunaβs gaze with unwavering resolve. βLet this man serve me in the Vermillion hall. My private garden needs tending. Let him work under my watch so that he may learn a lesson. Let him toil in the hardship of life for his mistake, rather than meet more... final end.β
The man at Sukunaβs feet looks up, his eyes wide with shock, perhaps hope, though he dares not speak. It was almost rare for anyone to be heard speaking with such authority in this hall the way Ryomen Sukuna does.
It was rarer that your voice was heard with such a loud echo. The other woman speaks, they all must think. The rarest words from her lips. Mercy, the virtue of the woman she could never replace, echoing in the stone sight of her.
The hall remains silent, as if everyone is holding their breath, waiting for Sukunaβs response.
Sukunaβs eyes linger on you, studying you for a long moment. You can feel the weight of his power in his gaze, the way he considers your words, turning them over in his mind. He is not a man to grant mercy lightly, and you know the risk youβre taking by asking this of him.
But after nearly ten years by his side, youβve come to understand how to navigate his moods, his whims, and his sense of order. You knew when to have him indulge you, even when it was not an occurrence you repeated frequently.
Finally, a slow smile curves at the corners of his mouth. Itβs not a warm smileβit never isβbut itβs a sign that heβs pleased. βVery well, little one.β he says, his voice carrying the authority of his decision. βLet him serve you in the Vermillion hall. He will tend your garden, as you wish. But if he steps out of lineβif he falters, even onceβyou will bring him back to me. He shall meet his end in the hands of his lord. Do you understand?β
There is no mistaking the threat beneath his words. You nod, accepting his terms.
βThank you, my lord.β you say softly, turning your gaze to the man who has been spared, for now. He looks up at you with a mix of relief and fear, clearly aware of how close he came to a far more brutal fate.
Sukuna leans back on his throne, watching you both, as if amused by the small victory youβve won for the man. But you know better than to think Sukuna was softened. This was merely a moment of indulgence, granted to you because of the peculiar bond you shared.
As the guards move to take the man away, you return your attention to the grand statue of Ryomen Hiromi, standing in front of you, her stone eyes as cold and distant as ever.
In the shadow of the woman who had everything, you had won a small victory today. But the haunting presence of Hiromi lingered still, reminding you that no matter what you did, Sukunaβs heart would never truly belong to you. And no matter what β your kindness would never be as beloved by the people who revered the stone that was left.
YOU ENJOYED THE PRIVILEGE OF PRIVACY. Every day, you enjoyed the distant life you had lived here in the Vermillion hall. The Vermillion hall had been a gift from Sukuna, presented to you on your fifth year in his temple.
It wasnβt grand in the way his own halls were, but it was yours. A quiet, secluded enclave within the sprawling temple grounds, removed from the constant presence of the other concubines and the weight of Hiromiβs looming statues.
In the years prior, you had only been given a selection of rooms within Sukunaβs own quarters, close enough for him to visit whenever he pleased. Though his visits were rare, those rooms had been a symbol of your availability to him, a reminder that you were under his thumb, always within reach.
But as time passed, and your bond with Sukuna evolved into something more complex than mere possession, he decided to give you something more. Vermillion hall became yours. It was a gesture that left the other concubines seething with jealousy.
They already despised how close you had become to Sukuna, how often he lingered by your side, and now they had another reason to resent you. You knew that their hatred ran deep, festered in the corridors of his temple, where whispers of favoritism and betrayal echoed in the dark.
To pacify them, and perhaps to create some distance between you and their hostility, Sukuna had given you the Vermillion Hall. It wasnβt a grand act of love, nor was it some romantic gesture. It was practical. The gift served to ease tensions, to quell your growing discomfort, and to offer you a reprieve from the suffocating dynamics of the templeβs inner court.
In Vermillion Hall, you had your own household. Your own space, away from the eyes that burned with envy. Your own garden, tended by servants who answered only to you. There were pleasantries there, comforts that softened the harshness of your life with Sukuna. The hall was peaceful, serene, and for the first time in years, you had a sense of autonomy, a place to call your own.
You were aware of what the gift truly meant. It wasnβt love, not even affection in the way one might hope. Sukuna had never cared in that way. His gestures, while grand, were always calculated.
Vermillion hall was an offering of peace, a way to keep you satisfied, pacified. It wasnβt an act of affection but of convenience. With your own residence, you were removed from the tensions of the other concubines. You were out of the way, kept at a distance while still under his control.
And yet, you were grateful. Despite knowing the reasons behind it, you cherished the hall because it afforded you something you hadnβt realized you craved so deeplyβfreedom.
You were far enough from the other concubines, from their petty schemes and cruel glares. Away from the prying, stone-cold eyes of Hiromiβs likeness, always watching you from every corner of the main temple. And, perhaps most importantly, you were away from Sukunaβs immediate reach.
Here, in your quiet refuge, you could breathe without constantly feeling the weight of his presence or his demands. The distance didnβt erase your bond with himβSukuna could summon you whenever he wished, and you would always returnβbut it allowed you moments of solitude, moments to reflect and gather yourself.
In Vermillion Hall, you found a strange sort of peace. Away from the tempest of Sukunaβs world, you could finally be alone with your thoughts. And in that space, you realized how much you had craved this separationβhow, even in your closeness to Sukuna, you had always yearned to be free from the shadow of both him and Hiromi.
The garden at Vermillion hall was your sanctuary. It had been from the moment you first stepped foot into it, surrounded by delicate vermillion petals, fragrant herbs, and the soft hum of natureβs presence.
Sukuna had forbidden the servants from tending to it, decreeing that it was yours alone to care for, a space untouched by others. It was a strange sort of giftβone that granted you solitude but also burdened you with its upkeep.
In the beginning, you had relished the challenge, pouring your time and energy into every plant, every blossom. The act of tending the garden gave you purpose, something to pour your hands into when everything else in your life felt dictated by Sukunaβs whims. It was an escape, a place where you could breathe and let your thoughts wander.
But as the years passed, you found it harder to keep up with. The garden grew wild, sprawling beyond what you could manage alone. The weight of maintaining it, along with the complexities of your life in Vermillion hall, began to overwhelm you. What was once your refuge now became a reminder of your isolation, each untended leaf and overgrown vine whispering of the loneliness you felt within these walls.
That was when Sukuna granted your requestβbegrudgingly, perhapsβand allowed you a servant. The man who came to you, your new gardener, was named Hironobu. His name meant βgentle abundanceβ and it seemed to suit him perfectly.
He was a quiet, unassuming figure, with a calm presence that filled the garden like a steady breeze. He wasnβt like the other servants, who always carried a quiet fear of Sukuna in their eyes. There was something different about Hironobu, a certain calm that put you at ease in a way you hadnβt expected.
At first, you barely spoke to him, unsure of how to navigate the strangeness of having someone else in your once-private space. But as days turned to weeks, and weeks to months, you began to find comfort in his presence. He tended to the garden with care, never overstepping, always leaving space for you to do what you wished. But slowly, you began to rely on him more and more. His hands, though calloused, were gentle with the plants, and you found yourself watching him sometimes, noticing the way he seemed to move with the rhythm of the earth.
Conversations began to bloom between the two of you, small at firstβa comment about the soil, a shared observation about a plantβs growth. But over time, you began to talk about other things. Life. The temple. The world beyond its walls, which felt like a distant dream. Hironobu listened more than he spoke, his quiet presence a balm to your often lonely existence.
You found yourself drawn to him in ways you hadnβt anticipated. Not in the same way you were tied to Sukuna, but in something softer, something more human. Hironobu didnβt see you as a concubine or as someone living in the shadow of Hiromi. He saw you as you wereβa person. A soul, just like him.
There was no pretense with him. No judgment. Just quiet understanding.
In the afternoons, you would find him in the garden, kneeling by the plants, his fingers brushing against the earth as if he were communicating with it. You would sit nearby, watching him work, feeling a peace you hadnβt known in years. It was a strange thing, this growing connection between the two of you.
You werenβt sure when it had startedβperhaps from the very first time he smiled at you, or perhaps later, when you noticed that being with him felt different than with anyone else.
With Hironobu, the garden began to feel like a sanctuary again, not just from Sukuna or the other concubines, but from your own loneliness. The space that had once been yours alone became something shared, and in that sharing, something beautiful blossomedβa quiet companionship, a bond that grew in the shadow of the vermillion blossoms.
For the first time in a long while, you felt like you werenβt completely alone. Hironobu was there, steady and calm, tending to the garden as if it were the most natural thing in the world. And with each passing day, you found yourself growing closer to him, drawn to the gentle abundance of his presence.
One late afternoon, as the sun began to dip beyond the horizon, casting long shadows across the garden, you found yourself kneeling beside Hironobu. He was carefully pruning one of the flowering shrubs, his focus entirely on the delicate task. You watched him for a moment in silence, taking in the way his hands moved with precision, the soft rustle of leaves under his touch.
βYouβve done wonders with this place, Hironobu.β you finally said, your voice breaking the quiet. βI barely recognize it anymore. It feelsβ¦ alive again.β
Hironobu glanced up, offering a small smile. βIt was always alive, thanks to your good work, my lady. It just needed a little bit more care.β
You could feel warmth brush against your cheek as you nodded, brushing your fingers along the edge of a flower petal. βI couldnβt have managed it on my own. Iβm grateful that youβre here.β
There was a moment of quiet between you, the air filled with the soft hum of the gardenβs life. Hironobu set down his tools and wiped his hands on a cloth, then looked at you with an expression that was both kind and thoughtful.
βYou speak as if youβre alone here, my lady.β he said quietly. βBut youβre not. Not anymore.β
His words settled between you, a truth that you hadnβt fully realized until now. The loneliness that had once pressed down on you had lifted, little by little, ever since he arrived.
βI supposeβ¦ Iβve gotten used to being alone.β you admitted, your voice softer than before. βItβs been that way for so long. Even when I was with lord Sukuna, surrounded by people, it was always the same. The othersβ¦ they hated me. And lady Hiromiβ¦β¦β You hesitated, glancing at the distant temple where her statues stood in silent vigil. βSheβs everywhere.β
Hironobuβs gaze followed yours, but he said nothing for a moment. Instead, he sat back on his heels and watched you with a gentle patience that you had come to value. You could tell that he had some fondness for Hiromi.
Who wouldnβt? His parents must have told her of the good deeds of Ryomen Hiromi. You were but a nobody and Hiromi, she was immortal to the people, to the land. You were an outsider to these people.
βDo you resent lady Hiromi, my lady?β he asked quietly, his tone free of judgment.
You shook your head, though the truth of it weighed heavily on you. βNo. I canβt. How could I? Lord Sukuna loved her. And she is kind and generous, she was genuine, I am sure. But Iβ¦..Iβmβ¦ Iβm only here because I remind him of her.β
Hironobuβs brow furrowed slightly, his eyes thoughtful. βAnd yet, he chose to keep you close. To give you this hall, this garden. Thatβs not something he does for everyone, my lady. You are important to our lord.β
βMaybe.β You sighed, the weight of your situation pressing down on you once more. βBut itβs not love. I doubt it was. Not like it was with lady Hiromi.β
There was a long pause as you both sat in the quiet of the garden, the only sound the soft breeze moving through the leaves.
βDo you wish it was, my lady?β Hironobu asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
You turned to look at him, surprised by the question. His eyes were steady, sincere. It wasnβt the first time youβd wondered that yourself. Would it be easier if Sukuna truly loved you? If you werenβt just a replacement for a woman who was no longer here?
But as you looked into Hironobuβs eyes, the answer felt more complicated than it ever had before.
βI donβt know, Hironobu.β you admitted, your voice quiet. βMaybe at first, I did. But nowβ¦ Iβm not sure it matters.β
Hironobuβs expression softened, and he nodded as if he understood. βLove doesnβt always come in the way we expect it to, my lady.β
You met his gaze, feeling a strange warmth bloom in your chest. There was something about the way he said it, the way his words felt more like an invitation than a simple observation.
βI suppose not.β you murmured.
A comfortable silence fell between you again, and after a few moments, Hironobu stood and extended a hand to help you up. You took it, feeling the warmth of his palm against yours, and for a moment, you stood there together in the quiet of the garden.
βShall we finish up for today?β he asked, his voice gentle.
You nodded, but as you turned to leave, you couldnβt help but glance back at him. βHironobu?β
He paused, looking at you curiously. βYes, my lady?β
βI donβt think I could have done this without you.β you said, your voice soft but sincere. βNot just the garden. Everything.β
A small, genuine smile tugged at the corners of his lips. βYouβre not alone anymore, my lady. I hope you may remember that.β
You held his gaze for a moment longer before nodding, a quiet understanding passing between you. As you walked back toward the hall, you couldnβt help but feel that something had shifted. Not just in the garden, but between you and Hironobu as well. The distance that once separated you felt smaller, and for the first time in a long while, you felt a glimmer of hope.
Perhaps, in the gentle abundance of his presence, you had found something you hadnβt been looking for. Something that, unlike the garden, wouldnβt fade with time.
YOU STARTED TO ENJOY GARDENING WITH SOMEONE. As the days passed in the garden, you and Hironobu grew closer. His laughter filled the spaces that had long been silent, echoing in the air like a sweet melody that danced among the blossoms.
Each shared moment became a thread weaving into the fabric of your existence, bringing warmth and light into your life. The garden, once a sanctuary of solitude and melancholy, transformed into a vibrant tapestry of color and life under his gentle care.
You found yourself eagerly anticipating his visits, counting down the hours until he would arrive, a basket in hand, ready to tend to the plants that flourished under his skilled touch.
The sunlight seemed to brighten when he stepped through the gates of the vermilion hall, illuminating not just the petals of the flowers but your heart as well. Each time he smiled, it felt as though the world around you bloomed anew, and you began to notice the small joys that had previously gone unnoticedβthe way the sun filtered through the leaves, the gentle rustle of the wind, and the songs of birds fluttering above.
Conversations flowed easily between you, often starting with the mundane aspects of gardeningβdiscussing the best ways to prune the roses or debating which herbs to plant next. But as you both shared stories and laughter, the dialogue deepened, revealing layers of your souls. Hironobu spoke of his childhood, his dreams of becoming a skilled gardener, and the joy he found in nurturing life. You opened up about your life in the temple, the challenges you faced as Sukunaβs concubine, and the bittersweet longing you felt for freedom.
βDo you remember the first time you showed me how to care for the orchids?β you asked one day, recalling the way he had patiently guided your hands, teaching you the delicate art of nurturing the fragile blooms.
Hironobu chuckled, a warm, rich sound that resonated in your chest. βYou were a quick learner. I think you were more excited about getting your hands dirty than the flowers themselves!β
You smiled at the memory, the image of dirt smudged across your palms and the way his eyes had sparkled with amusement. βMaybe I just liked spending time with you,β you replied, your heart racing at your own boldness.
His gaze softened, and you could see a flicker of something deeper in his eyesβsomething that hinted at unspoken feelings. βI like spending time with you too. You make this place feel alive. Itβs more than just the plants; itβs the way you see beauty in everything, even in the shadows.β
His words wrapped around you like a warm blanket, filling the hollow spaces within your heart that had long been empty. You found yourself blushing, the warmth of his gaze igniting a spark of hope in your chest. In those moments, the weight of your circumstances seemed to lift, if only for a while. You felt cherished, seen, andβdare you think itβtruly happy.
Yet, as the days turned into weeks, you were reminded of the solitude that lingered beneath this newfound joy. While Hironobu brought a lightness to your life, there was still an underlying ache, a reminder that this connection, as precious as it felt, existed in a world defined by shadows.
One afternoon, as you and Hironobu knelt side by side in the garden, tending to a patch of vibrant marigolds, he paused, his hands resting in the soil. βYou know,β he began thoughtfully, βitβs strange how life brings us together in unexpected ways. I never imagined I would find such joy in tending a garden, especially one that belongs to someone as remarkable as you.β
You glanced at him, your heart swelling at the sincerity in his voice. βItβs not just the garden. Youβve brought joy into my life, Hironobu. I canβt remember the last time I felt thisβ¦ alive.β
His eyes met yours, and in that moment, the world outside the garden faded away. The towering walls of the temple, the looming presence of Sukuna, and the whispers of the other concubinesβall of it seemed to vanish, leaving just the two of you, surrounded by the fragrant blooms and the warmth of the sun.
βI wish I could give you more than this, my lady.β Hironobu said softly, his expression earnest. βYou deserve to be happy, to feel free. This garden is a refuge, but I want you to feel that way outside of it too.β
Your heart fluttered at his words, the weight of longing and affection intertwining within you. βIβ¦ I donβt know what the future holds for me, but right now, Iβm grateful for this moment with you, Hironobu.β
One evening, as the sun set in a blaze of oranges and purples, you were gathering a basket of freshly picked herbs when Hironobu approached, his expression unusually serious.
βMay I speak with you for a moment?β he asked, his tone almost hesitant.
You set the basket down and nodded, your heart fluttering with curiosity. βOf course. Whatβs on your mind?β
He took a deep breath, his hands clasped together in front of him. βI want to apologize for what Iβm about to say, my lady.β he started, his voice steady but laced with a hint of nervousness. βI know it may change things between us.β
Your brow furrowed in confusion. βHironobu, what do you mean?β
He shifted his weight, glancing away as if searching for the right words. βIβve grown fond of youβmore than I intended to. I can no longer pretend that itβs just admiration or friendship.β He paused, his gaze finally meeting yours, filled with an earnestness that made your heart race. βIβm in love with you, my lady.β
The world seemed to pause at his confession. The weight of his words hung in the air between you, and your breath caught in your throat. You opened your mouth to respond, but no words came.
βI know you are married to lord Sukuna, my lady.β he continued, his voice low and filled with regret. βAnd I never intended to overstep my bounds. But I had to tell you, because hiding it would only cause me more pain and I would not be fair to you, my lady.β
You took a step back, your mind racing. βHironobu, Iββ
βPlease, my lady.β he interrupted gently, raising a hand to stop you. βI donβt expect anything from you. I just needed you to know how I feel. You deserve to know that youβve brought joy into my life, more than I could ever have imagined. And if you cannot return those feelings, I will understand. I justβ¦ I couldnβt keep it to myself anymore.β
The sincerity in his eyes made your heart ache. You felt a mixture of emotionsβsurprise, fear, and an undeniable warmth that surged through you at his words.
βI never wanted to put you in this position, Hironobu.β you admitted, your voice trembling slightly. βIβve enjoyed our time together so much, but Iβ¦ Iβm married to lord Sukuna. You know how he is.β
βOf course, my lady.β he replied, his voice barely above a whisper. βBut that doesnβt change how I feel. I just thoughtβ¦ perhaps there was a chance you might feel the same way.β
You swallowed hard, the reality of your situation crashing down on you like a wave. Sukuna was a force of nature, and while your relationship with him was complex, it was rooted in years of shared historyβof loyalty and duty.
But here was Hironobu, his honesty and vulnerability laid bare before you. He was a breath of fresh air in your life, and the connection you shared felt like a balm to the wounds of your past.
βIββ you began, searching for the right words. βYou make me feel seen, Hironobu. Happy. But this isnβt simple. I canβt justββ
βI donβt want you to feel pressured, my lady.β he said, stepping closer, concern etched on his features. βI expect nothing. I only wanted to be honest about my feelings. And take care of you, my lady. You deserve that much.β
You took a deep breath, the weight of your emotions almost overwhelming. βI appreciate your honesty. It means a lot to me, truly. But I canβt deny that this is all very complicated. I never intended for this to happen.β
βI understand, my lady.β he replied, his eyes filled with a mixture of hope and sadness. βWhatever happens, I want you to know that Iβll be here for you. I care about you, and I want to help you in any way I can. I will be your servant, for as long as I live.β
In that moment, something shifted between you. The air felt charged with unspoken possibilities, and though the path ahead was uncertain, the connection you had with Hironobu felt undeniable. You might not have the answers now, but there was a warmth in the garden that promised a new beginning.
βI see.β you said softly, your heart pounding.Β
βMy lady, I adore you. I always will.β Hironobu said, giving you a small, reassuring smile. βIβll always be here, tending to the gardenβand to you.β
As he turned to leave, you watched him go, your heart racing with a mixture of fear and excitement. You couldnβt help but wonder what this new chapter might hold, not just for you, but for both of you. In the gardenβs gentle embrace, you felt a sense of hope begin to bloom, fragile yet persistent.
YOU THINK YOUβVE NEVER BEEN THE PERSON TO PRAY. But in the past ten years, you found yourself finding relief in prayer. It reminds you of your motherβs piety, of your fatherβs mumbling whispers to the gods, your brothers and sisters sitting beside you.
You havenβt seen them in ten years. But you wish they were well. And even if you donβt see them anymore, this gives you relief.
You knelt in the inner sanctum of the temple, bowing your head in prayer before the statue of Bishamon. Your lips moved silently, asking for a clear mind, but no matter how hard you prayed, you could not banish the thought from your headβHironobu, your loyal gardener, had confessed his love to you.
It had taken you by surprise. You were Sukuna's concubine. You could not be with Hironobu. And yet, he made you happy in a way you hadnβt known was possible, and your heart was torn. To tell Sukuna was out of the question. If he knew, he could kill Hironobu without hesitation. You shivered at the thought.
The flickering light from the templeβs lanterns cast shadows on the walls, their soft glow doing little to soothe the turmoil raging inside you. How could something so pureβa love untainted by power and possessionβbe so wrong? How could you feel joy when the very thought of it put Hironobuβs life in peril?
Your mind returned to that moment, the way his eyes had softened when he spoke his feelings, the tenderness in his voice. He had always been gentle, always there with a quiet presence, nurturing the garden you so often found peace in. And now, he wants to nurture you. But you were Sukunaβs, bound to him by fear and something you could never quite define as love. Duty, perhaps. A twisted form of devotion. But love? That was not something you could claim to feel for the man who held you in his iron grip.
A soft breeze swept through the temple, brushing against your skin like a whisper, and you closed your eyes, imagining for a moment what life might be like if things were different. If you could run. If you could be free. But such thoughts were dangerous, reckless even, and you knew you would never act on them.
Just then, you heard footsteps behind you, a familiar presence that made your breath catch. Sukuna.
"I didnβt know you prayed," his voice cut through the silence like a blade, deep and commanding, bringing you back to the harsh reality of your situation.
Your heart raced as you slowly rose from your knees, turning to face him. He stood in the dim light, towering over you as always, his gaze sharp and penetrating.
"I did not take you for a pious woman," Sukuna continued, his eyes narrowing slightly, scrutinizing you.
"Piety is a comfort, my lord," you replied quietly, your voice steady despite the storm in your chest. "It eases the soul to have someone that listens."
Sukunaβs eyes flicked toward the statue of Bishamon for a moment before returning to you. "Hm," he muttered, unimpressed, though his gaze lingered on you longer than usual. "Then do you pray to me?"
You blinked, taken aback by the question. "What do you mean, my lord?"
Sukuna stepped closer, his presence overwhelming, his eyes dark and intense. "Am I not a god?" he asked, his tone low and dangerous. "Your god?"
For a moment, your breath faltered, but then you gathered yourself. You had to be careful. You had to choose your words wisely. A soft, almost bitter smile tugged at your lips. "My lord," you whispered, meeting his gaze with a quiet defiance, "do I not worship you already? Does my entire existence, my suffering, my love for youβ" your voice grew quieter, but sharper, "βis it not enough worship for you as my god?"
Sukunaβs expression darkened, his jaw tightening, but he said nothing. His gaze remained locked on yours, and for the first time in your life, you saw something close to uncertainty flicker in his eyes.
But you did not feel victorious. You felt hollow. Because no matter what you said, no matter how sharp your words were, you were still bound to him. Still trapped.
And Hironobu? He would never be yours.
The silence between you and Sukuna stretched on, thick with tension. His gaze remained locked on you, unyielding, as though searching for something deeper within youβsome trace of weakness, some sign of betrayal. But you stood tall, your heart pounding in your chest. You couldnβt let him see your turmoil, couldnβt let him suspect that anyone had stirred your heart, least of all someone as lowly as a gardener.
Sukunaβs lips curled into a smirk, though there was no amusement in his eyes. βCareful with your tongue, woman,β he said softly, but the threat in his voice was unmistakable. βThere are limits to even my patience.β
You bowed your head slightly, a gesture of submission. βOf course, my lord. Forgive me if my words displeased you.β
He watched you for a moment longer, his gaze piercing through your very soul, before turning away, his crimson robes trailing behind him as he walked toward the templeβs entrance. For a moment, you allowed yourself to breathe, thinking he was leaving, that the conversation had come to an end.
But then he stopped.
βYou seemβ¦ distant, little one.β Sukuna remarked, his voice casual but laced with suspicion. He didnβt turn to face you, but you could feel his eyes on you, even without seeing them. βSomething troubles you.β
Your heart froze. Did he know? Could he sense the conflict within you?
βNo, my lord.β you replied quickly, too quickly, the lie on your lips before you could think. βI am merely tired.β
βTired? This does not seem to be you, little one.β he repeated, his tone dripping with disbelief. Slowly, he turned to face you, and the way his eyes bore into yours made your pulse quicken. βI donβt believe you.β
Your throat tightened as you scrambled for something, anything, to say. βIββ
Before you could finish, Sukuna took a step closer, closing the distance between you in an instant. His hand shot out, grabbing your chin with a roughness that made you wince, forcing you to meet his gaze.
βI am not someone who tolerates deceit, little one.β he growled, his face mere inches from yours. βIf something weighs on your mind, you will tell me. Now.β
The air around you felt suffocating, your mind racing with thoughts of Hironobu. You couldnβt tell him. You couldnβt. The truth would mean deathβfor Hironobu, perhaps for you as well. But Sukunaβs grip tightened, his impatience growing, and you knew you had to give him something.
βI am troubled, my lord. you admitted, your voice shaking slightly. βBut it is not something that concerns you, my lord.β
He raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued but still suspicious. βEverything about you concerns me. You belong to me.β
You swallowed hard, forcing yourself to hold his gaze. βIt is onlyβ¦ the weight of my life, my place here. Nothing more.β
Sukunaβs eyes narrowed, his grip on your chin loosening slightly. βYour place is exactly where I put you, little one.β he said coldly, his fingers trailing down your neck in a way that made your skin crawl. βDo not forget that.β
βI havenβt, my lord. You must not have to worry.β you whispered, your voice barely audible.Β
For a moment, he seemed to study you, searching your face for signs of rebellion, of disobedience. But then, slowly, he released you, taking a step back. You wonder if it was relief or it was disappointment you truly feel β knowing that he does not ask, that he lets you go. You purse your lips in a tight line. But you know that he does not wish to notice it.Β
βGood.β he muttered, turning away once more. βDo not forget who holds your life in their hands.β
With that, he strode toward the exit, his presence leaving the room like a dark cloud finally lifting. You stood there, frozen, the echoes of his words reverberating through your mind. He didnβt know. Not yet.
But how long could you keep this secret? How long before Sukunaβs suspicions became too great, before he began digging for the truth? You had already slipped too close to the edge today, and it terrified you to think of how much closer you might come tomorrow.
And Hironobuβ¦ how could you ever look at him again, knowing the danger your feelings for him brought? Knowing that Sukunaβs wrath could fall upon him at any moment?
A tear slipped down your cheek, but you quickly wiped it away. There was no room for weakness. Not here. Not in Sukunaβs world. But in the quiet recesses of your heart, where Sukuna could not reach, the thought of Hironobu lingeredβlike a fleeting ray of light in a dark, unyielding storm.
YOU HAD EXCUSED YOURSELF FROM DINNER EARLY. And you could not take too much food when you were in Sukunaβs chambers. That had concerned Sukuna, even if he did not want to show it. You were a human being after all. And if anything was wrong with you, it concerns Sukuna. You were his. You were a part of him.
And if a part of him was unwell, he must ensure its settled. Ryomen Sukuna had not meant to stay long when he visited Vermillion hall, your residence. He had come for something trivial, something that now seemed insignificant as his eyes fell upon you.
He stood in the shadows, watching from a distance, concealed by the thick trees lining the garden. You didnβt notice him; your attention was entirely on that servant, that Hironobu. He could feel the air punched out of his chest.
The way you smiled at him, laughed softly at something he saidβit was a smile Sukuna had never seen on your face before. Genuine, unguarded, free. Happy. In the truest sense.Β
That wretched low life Hironobu knelt beside you, tending to the flowers, his hands moving carefully as he spoke to you. There was no fear in his eyes, no hesitation. No, Sukuna could understand it. It was the tenderness he had when he looked at Hiromi. He looked at you as if you were the only thing that mattered in the world.It was love. It was adoration. It was devotion. Sukunaβs chest tightened painfully, and his fists clenched at his sides.
What was this feeling? A tug, something sharp and bitter gnawing at him, growing stronger the longer he watched you with Hironobu. He wasnβt used to thisβthis strange, almost foreign sensation. He knew anger, jealousy, possession. But thisβ¦ this felt different. More unsettling
He wonders now, if heβs ever seen that smile on your face when you look at him. If youβve ever truly been happy in the grace of his existence. But somehow, within the depths of what remains in his heart, there was pain. There was jealousy. There was anguish. There was grief. And he didnβt know why. He didnβt know why he felt like this. His heart had long died. Died with his beloved Hiromi and yetβ¦.
His face contorted into a scowl, his jaw tightening. He turned sharply on his heel, his robes whipping through the air as he left without a word. The sight of you with Hironobu left an acid taste in his mouth, and though he hated to admit it, it bothered him in a way he could not explain.
That next morning, he summoned you to break his fast with himβeven rarer than supping with him.
When you arrived, the room was dimly lit from the shading silk, the atmosphere thick with something you couldnβt quite place. Ryomen Sukuna sat at the head of the long table, his scarlet eyes dark, his expression unreadable.
You felt a cold knot in your stomach as you approached him, the air between you tense and charged. You were not hungry. You could not feel any pleasure knowing that he was staring at you that way.
βMy lord, I greet you with fervent devotion.β you said softly, bowing slightly before taking your place at the table. He didnβt respond immediately, simply watching you with that same piercing gaze that always made you feel exposed.
The silence stretched on, oppressive and heavy, before he finally spoke. βI visited Vermillion Hall last night.β
Your heart skipped a beat. The way he said it, the deliberate pauseβit sent a wave of dread washing over you. βIβ¦ I was unaware of your visit, my lord.β you replied carefully, trying to keep your voice steady. βYou must forgive me if I had not noticed.β
His eyes narrowed slightly, a cruel smile playing on his lips. βClearly.β
You shifted in your seat, sensing the trap closing in around you. There was a tension in Sukuna that you had rarely seen, something simmering beneath the surface. You remained in your position, feeling a bile stuck on the edge of your throat.
You could feel the sweat fervent on your palm as you gripped your kimono tenderly, hoping he would not notice the tension and fear in you.
βI saw you, little one.β he continued, his tone low and almost too calm. βWith that lowly thief of a servant...what was his name....ah yes, Hironobu.β
Your blood ran cold at his words.
You knew what your husband was like.
You had made a mistake, you knew that well.
βI saw how happy you were with him, little one.β Sukuna said, his voice tightening ever so slightly, though his expression remained controlled. βSmiling, laughing, as if there were no worries in the world. Itβs a wonder Iβve never seen you look that way with me.β
His words stung, even though you knew better than to show it. You lowered your gaze, knowing you were walking a very fine line. You knew him too well. He considered you a part of him, the god he is.
And everything, it has to be about him. Your existence was taught to worship him. Loving him was the law, even if he would not give it back. And you could not have the same, you know that.Β
βIβhe was simply tending to the garden, my lord. We merelyβ¦ spoke as we often do. It was a mere passing laugh and enjoyment.β
βIs that all?β Sukuna asked, his voice taking on a dangerous edge. βBecause from where I stood, it seemed more than that, little one.β
You swallowed hard, your hands trembling slightly as you clenched them under the table. You couldnβt lie, not to him. But the truthβhow could you explain the way you felt with Hironobu without damaging yourself?
βMy lord, I beg for your understanding.β you began, carefully choosing your words. βHironobu is kind and loyal to me, to you. He tends to the garden and offers his company when I walk, to ensure that he could care for you in caring for me. Nothing more, my lord.β
Sukunaβs eyes flickered with something dark and unreadable. βKindness?β he sneered, leaning back in his chair. βIs that what makes you smile like that? Is that what makes you laugh so freely? How easy are you, little one? Do you offer such a thing to everyone, is it necessary, little one?β
βMy lordββ
You opened your mouth to respond, but his voice cut through the air again, sharper this time. βDo you think I am blind? That I cannot see whatβs happening under my own roof?β
Your heart pounded in your chest as you looked up at him, meeting his furious gaze. He wasnβt just angry. No, there was something deeper, something more dangerous. Hurt. Betrayal. You wonder why he feels this way. He had it clear even ten years ago that his heart had died. And that he was a god.
Because how could that be? Ryomen Sukuna was not someone to feel such things, to be vulnerable to them. And yet, as he stared at you, the fury in his scarlet eyes was laced with something raw.
βAnswer me, little one.β he demanded, his voice low and threatening. βIs he more to you than just a gardener?β
The truth was clawing at your throat, begging to be let out, but you knew what it would mean. Hironobu would die. Sukuna would never allow it, would never tolerate even the hint of disobedience or disloyalty from you. And yet⦠Could you lie to him again?
βMy lord,he is nothing but a servant tied to me to grace your glory.β you whispered, your voice trembling. βYou knowβ¦you know I would never betray you, my lord.β
He watched you for a moment. It was then where Sukuna stood abruptly, his chair scraping against the floor as he rose to his full, imposing height. He stalked toward you, his scarlet eyes blazing, and you felt a cold sweat break across your skin.
βIf I find out otherwise, little one.β he growled, his hand grabbing your chin, tilting your face up to his. βHironobuβs kindness wonβt be enough to save him. And youββ his voice dropped to a menacing whisper. ββyou will know exactly what it means to displease me. You know me the best out of those fools in the concubine hall, do you not? You must know what I am willing to do.β
His grip on your chin tightened for a moment before he let you go, leaving you breathless, terrified, and more trapped than ever. You tried to calm yourself, you know you cannot show more. You cannot appear weak, not like this.
Sukunaβs wrath hung over you like a storm, and as he turned and walked away, you were left with the suffocating knowledge that your secret was on the verge of unraveling.
As Sukuna stormed out of the room, the sliding door nearly breaking along the path he left behind him, you remained frozen in your seat. The air was thick with his lingering presence, the scent of incense mixing with the oppressive tension that still hung over you. Your hands, resting in your lap, trembled uncontrollably. You felt the weight of Sukunaβs warning, his threat echoing in your mind.
Hironobu.
The thought of him twisted your heart painfully. You had always known the danger that came with even the slightest hint of affection for another man, but Sukuna had never been this close to the truth before. His suspicion was like a sword dangling over both your heads, ready to strike at any moment.
You rose from the table slowly, your legs unsteady beneath you. The silence of the grand dining hall was suffocating, every step you took feeling heavier than the last. You could barely think, barely breathe. All you could do was replay Sukunaβs words in your mind. The anger, the possessivenessβand something else. The hurt.
Could it be that Sukuna, the mighty king of curses, had actually been wounded by what he saw? You had always believed that you were just another possession to him, another piece in his vast collection of power and control. But tonight, there had been something deeper in his voice, something almost vulnerable.
And that terrified you even more.
When you reached the privacy of your chambers, you collapsed onto the bed, your body trembling from the weight of the evening. Your heart raced as you tried to steady your breath, but it was no use. Every time you close your eyes, you see Hironobuβs face, his warm, gentle smileβand Sukunaβs cold, furious gaze.
What were you going to do? You couldnβt abandon Hironobu. The thought of him being killed because of you, because of a love you couldnβt deny, was unbearable. And yet, if Sukuna found out, there would be no mercy. Not for either of you.
A soft knock at your door pulled you from your thoughts, and you quickly sat up, brushing away the stray tears that had escaped. βYou may enter.β you called, trying to keep your voice steady.
The door creaked open, and to your surprise, it was Hironobu who stepped inside. His expression was calm, as it always was, but there was a softness in his eyes that made your chest tighten. Tension passes through you as much as fear does. You cover yourself with the blankets, as though to shield you from the vulnerability you feel for him.
βYou shouldnβt be here, Hironobu.β you whispered, panic rising in your throat. βIt is not allowed. This is notβ¦..Itβs too dangerous.β
βI know, my lady.β Hironobu replied quietly, closing the door behind him. He crossed the room in a few quick strides and knelt beside you, his hand reaching out to gently take yours. βBut I had to see you. I heard that lord Sukuna summoned you and everyone was whispering about him. He was mad, and I was worried that he could harm you, my lady.β
You looked into his eyes, the warmth and sincerity in them a stark contrast to the cold, terrifying presence of Sukuna. For a brief moment, being with Hironobu felt like a balm to the storm raging in your heart. But the danger was too real, too imminent.
βMy lord will not hurt me. You must know this.β You wonder if you were saying the right words. Ryomen Sukuna has hurt you. He always has, even if he does not lay a hand on you. βYou must trust that.β
βMy lady, stillββ
βHironobu.β you began, your voice breaking slightly. βLord Sukuna saw us in the garden the other day.β
Hironobuβs face paled, but he didnβt let go of your hand. βWhat did my lord say?β
You shook your head, feeling tears prick at your eyes again. βHeβs warned me. He said he saw how happy I was with you, how I smiled while we gardened today. He asked if you were more than just a gardener and servant to me.β
Hironobuβs hand tightened around yours. βAnd what did you tell him, my lady?β
βI told him I would never betray him. That we are only enjoying the garden together.β you whispered, the weight of your words heavy on your tongue. βBut I donβt know how much longer I can keep him at bay to keep you safe. Heβs watching us, Hironobu. I do not want him to hurt you, over your kindness and friendship and I fear for youββ
βI wonβt let him hurt you, my lady.β Hironobu interrupted, his voice firm but gentle. βIβll leave if I have to. I wonβt risk your life.β
βNo, no.β you said quickly, gripping his hand tighter. βYou canβt leave. That would only make him more suspicious. You are bound to me as a servant. My lord will be suspicious.β
Tears finally spilled over, and you tried to wipe them away, but Hironobu cupped your face in his hands, his thumbs brushing your cheeks softly. βWeβll figure this out, my lady. Do not be afraid.β he said softly, his voice a soothing balm to your frayed nerves. βWe have to be careful, even in our friendship, but I wonβt let him take you away from me.β
The intensity of his words made your heart ache, and for a moment, you allowed yourself to lean into his touch, to forget the danger, if only for a fleeting second. Being with Hironobu felt like a sanctuary, a place where you could be free from Sukunaβs suffocating grip.
But as much as you wanted to stay in this moment, you knew it couldnβt last. Ryomen Sukunaβs shadow loomed over everything, and no matter how careful you were, it was only a matter of time before he would find out the truth. One way or another, even if you had rejected Hironobu, Sukuna will end up being angry. And he would kill him. He would kill him and that would break you.
βIβm afraid, Hironobu.β you whispered, your voice barely audible. βI donβt know how much longer I can keep this up. Not having a life of my own.β
He leaned forward, resting his forehead against yours. βYouβre stronger than you think, my lady.β he murmured. βWeβll find a way, even if it means we have to run.β
You shook your head slightly. βHe would find us. You know he would.β
Hironobu didnβt argue. He knew the truth as well as you did. Ryomen Sukunaβs reach was vast, his power unmatched. There was no escaping him, not really.
But for now, in the quiet of your chambers, with Hironobu beside you, you allowed yourself to cling to the hope that somehow, some way, you could protect the fragile love you had found. Even if the world around you was crumbling.
The door creaked again, but before you could react, a cold voice sliced through the air.
βI told you, little one.β Sukunaβs voice was low, deadly, as he stepped out of the shadows, his eyes burning with fury, βthere are limits to my patience.β
Your heart stopped.
You felt frozen in place.
He had seen everything.
The room felt as though it had been plunged into icy darkness the moment Sukuna stepped forward. His presence filled the air, suffocating, his crimson gaze searing into both you and Hironobu. The warmth you had felt moments before vanished, replaced by a cold, gnawing dread that clawed at your throat.
You stood up quickly, your heart hammering in your chest. "My lordβ"
Sukunaβs eyes flicked to you, and the fury in them made your blood run cold. His face was a mask of controlled rage, but there was a darkness beneath the surface, threatening to spill over.
βI warned you, little one.β he growled, his voice low and dangerous, each word like a blade slicing through the air. His attention shifted to Hironobu, who had risen to his feet but made no move to defend himself. There was a strange calm in Hironobuβs expression, but you could see the tension in his body, the readiness for whatever was to come.
βMy lord, please.β you begged, stepping forward, your voice trembling. βPlease donβt hurt him. He had done nothing wrong.β
Sukunaβs eyes snapped back to you, narrowing. βDo you think your pleas mean anything to me now?β His voice dripped with contempt. βYouβve lied to me. You betrayed me. And for what? A mere gardener?β
Tears welled up in your eyes, but you forced yourself to stay calm, to keep speaking even though your heart was breaking with fear. βHe didnβtβhe didnβt do anything wrong, my lord. This is my fault.β
Sukunaβs lips twisted into a sneer. βYour fault? Oh, I know itβs your fault. You allowed this to happen. You let him think he could take what is mine.β
Your breath hitched. The possessiveness in the god Ryomen Sukuna echoed in his voice was suffocating, and you knew he was on the edge of doing something irreversible. Desperation clawed at you as you stepped closer, falling to your knees before him.
βPlease, my lord. Please. This is notβ¦.β you whispered, bowing your head, your hands trembling as you reached out, barely daring to touch the hem of his robe. βI beg youβdonβt hurt him. Heβ¦ he only cares for me. Itβs not his fault.β
Sukuna stared down at you, his expression unreadable. For a moment, there was silenceβan unbearable, suffocating silence that made your chest tighten with fear. You couldnβt bring yourself to look up at him, terrified of what you might see in his eyes.
βI should kill him where he stands,little one.β Sukuna said softly, though his voice was filled with venom. βI should make you watch as I tear him apart, so you understand the price of defiance.β
You gasped, your heart shattering at the thought. βNo! Please, my lord, no!β
But before you could continue, Sukuna moved faster than you could react, his hand shooting out and grabbing Hironobu by the throat. The sound of Hironobuβs breath choking in his lungs was like a knife to your heart.
βMy lord, please. Please, pleaseβSukuna!β you screamed, rushing to your feet, your hands trembling as you reached for him. βPlease, no! Iβll do anythingβanything! Just donβt kill him!β
Sukunaβs grip tightened, his gaze never leaving Hironobuβs face. βAnything?β he repeated, his voice cold and mocking. βWhat makes you think you have anything left to offer me, after this?β
Tears streamed down your face as you fell to your knees once more, your voice breaking. βIβll take whatever you impose upon me, my lordβIβll never speak to him again! Or any one else I swear to you, my lord! Justβ¦ please, donβt take his life. Itβs my fault. I should have known better. Iβll do anything you ask, my lord. Just spare his life. He had done nothing wrong.β
Sukunaβs grip on Hironobuβs throat loosened slightly, but his eyes remained locked on you, watching your every movement, every tear that fell from your eyes. His lips curled into a cruel smile, but there was no warmth, no mercy in it. He was enjoying this, owning you.
βIs that what you think will save him?β Sukuna asked, his tone soft, dangerous. βYour submission? Your devotion? Little one, I own you. I do not give your submission. You give it willingly. You know that.β
You nodded frantically, your voice a desperate whisper. βYesβ¦ yes, my lord. But I swear to you. I swear, my lord. Iβll submit to you in every way. I wonβt resist, I wonβt fight. I would continue to be devoted to you, only you.Β Just spare him, please.β
Ryomen Sukunaβs gaze flickered between you and Hironobu, his hand still wrapped around the gardenerβs throat. The tension in the room was unbearable, and you could barely breathe as you waited for his decision. You feel like you were going to collapse, as you stopped breathing waiting for him to say anything.
For what felt like an eternity, Sukuna said nothing. The silence was deafening, the weight of his power crushing you under its force. You knew that he could kill Hironobu in an instant, with a single flick of his hand. And yet⦠there was something holding him back.
Finally, Sukunaβs fingers released their hold on Hironobu, and he stepped back, letting the man fall to his knees, gasping for breath. But the danger hadnβt passed. Sukunaβs gaze was still fixed on you, dark and dangerous.
βGet out of my sight.β Sukuna snarled at Hironobu. βIf I see you near her again, Iβll tear you apart without hesitation. And there will be no more mercy.β
Hironobu, though clearly shaken, managed to stand, casting a glance at you, his eyes filled with both relief and sorrow. You gave him a small, trembling nod, urging him to leave while he still could. Without a word, he turned and disappeared through the door.
The moment he was gone, Ryomen Sukunaβs attention snapped back to you, and the full weight of his fury descended upon you.
βDonβt think for a moment that this is over, little one.β he said, his voice low and menacing. βYou think Iβll just forget this? That Iβll let you off with a warning?β
You looked up at him, your body trembling. βI knowβ¦ I know you wonβt, my lord.β you whispered. βIβll accept whatever punishment you see fit. Justβ¦ pleaseβ¦β
βPlease?β he mocked, leaning down so that his face was level with yours. βYou think you can still make requests of me after what I saw today?β
You swallowed hard, your throat dry. βI beg your mercy.β
Sukunaβs lips twisted into a cruel smile, and he reached out, tilting your chin up so that you were forced to meet his gaze. βMercy, huh.β he repeated, his voice soft, but laced with malice. βYou think you deserve mercy after betraying me?β
You shook your head slightly, tears still streaming down your face. βNoβ¦ I donβt. But Hironobuβhe didnβt deserve to die for my mistake.β
For a moment, Sukuna simply stared at you, his eyes burning with a mixture of rage and something darker, something possessive. Then, he released you, standing up straight once more.
βYou will never see him again. Never again. And not anyone.β he ordered coldly. βYou will stay at my side when asked where you belong. Know your place. And if you ever defy me again, I wonβt hesitate to kill himβand you.β
You nodded, your heart breaking as you whispered, βYes, my lord.β
YOU HADNβT TALKED IN A WHILE. Somehow you think you had forgotten what your voice sounds like. Silence has embraced you, as much as the darkness of the once vibrant Vermillion hall.
After that fateful night, everything changed. You isolated yourself in your chambers, the once-vibrant world of your garden now forbidden territory. Hironobu had vanished, leaving only a painful absence that lingered like a wound that refused to heal.Β
And there were whispers from the other halls of the temple that Ryomen Sukuna had killed him. You had expected it more or less. But it did not make it any easier. You wept in the silence of your halls.
And you had refused to eat, refused to change your clothes or wash yourself. Days blurred into one another, and the weight of your choices crushed you beneath their unbearable load.
Sukuna did not come to you. He did not summon you to his side. For a time, it felt as though you had become invisible to him, a ghost haunting the halls of the palace. At first, the silence seemed like a blessing; a reprieve from his suffocating presence, from his cruel words and piercing gaze. But as the days wore on, it began to gnaw at you. The solitude was maddening.
The garden that had once been your sanctuary became an unbearable reminder of what you had lost. You couldnβt bear to see the flowers Hironobu had so lovingly tended, the very space where you had felt fleeting moments of happiness. The very thought of stepping outside filled you with dread. You had no desire to face the world, not like this, not without him.
You were trappedβtrapped between the suffocating control of Sukuna and the hollow, aching void left by Hironobuβs absence. Every breath you took felt heavier than the last, until even breathing felt like a burden you could no longer bear.
For a time, you thought it would be better to die.
The thought came slowly at first, creeping in like a shadow at the edge of your mind. But the more you dwelled in your isolation, the more it seemed like a mercyβa release from the endless torment of your existence. You had lost everything that mattered. The love you had found with Hironobu was gone, stolen from you by Sukunaβs wrath. And Ryomen Sukunaβ¦ he had broken you. His control, his possessiveness, his cruelty had shattered whatever was left of your spirit.
One night, the darkness in your mind swallowed you whole, and you couldnβt fight it any longer.
You had waited until the moon was high, the Vermillion Hall silent. You like to think that Sukuna had ordered everyone to leave you to your loneliness. But it was too late at night. No one came to your chambers anymore. No one would stop you. With shaking hands, you found a length of silk, soft and delicate, and tied it to the ceiling beam.Β
The precious gold and vermillion silk had been a gift from Ryomen Sukuna long ago. It was the very name of the hall he had gifted you. One of the hardest silks to find and make. It was a symbol of his wealth, his power. And he gifted it to you, a small echo of ownership to you. How ironic, you thought, that it would be the instrument of your final escape.
Tears blurred your vision as you fashioned the knot, your breath coming in ragged gasps. You stood on the edge, your heart pounding in your chest, and for a moment, you hesitated. But the pain in your heart, the unbearable ache of everything you had lost, pushed you forward.
In the cold stillness of that moment, you stepped off the edge.
You woke in a haze, your body weak and aching, the dim light of dawn filtering through the curtains. You werenβt dead. Somehow, impossibly, you were still here. Confusion clouded your mind as you tried to move, but your limbs feel heavy, your throat raw.
And then you saw him.
You werenβt sure the first time.
But you let yourself look again.
Ryomen Sukuna was sitting beside your bed, his presence unmistakable even in the pale morning light. His expression was unreadable, his dark crimson eyes fixed on you with a strange intensity. For a long moment, neither of you spoke. You couldnβt speak well anyway. Your throat hurts.
You had never seen him like this beforeβsilent, unmoving, almost still as a statue. His gaze roamed over you, lingering on the dark bruises around your neck, the evidence of your desperate attempt to escape.
βWhy?β he asked, his voice low and dangerous, but there was something else there tooβsomething you couldnβt quite place.
You turned your head away from him, shame and sorrow overwhelming you. You force yourself to speak, even if it hurts. βBecauseβ¦ I canβt live like this anymore, my lord.β you whispered, your voice hoarse. βIβve lost everything.β
Sukunaβs eyes narrowed, a flicker of something passing over his face. βEverything? Do you think I would allow you to take your life without my permission?β
A pained bitter laugh escaped your lips, though it hurt to do so. βI canβt even die on my own terms?β
Sukuna leaned forward, his hand gripping the edge of the bed with barely controlled rage. βYou think death would be an escape from me?β he hissed. βYou belong to me, even in death, little one. Running away, it will not save you from me.β
Tears burned at the corners of your eyes, but you couldnβt hold them back any longer. βI belong to no one!β you cried, the words tumbling out in a flood of pain. βNot anymore. Not after what youβve taken from me.β
For a moment, Sukuna was silent, his expression dark and unreadable. Then, unexpectedly, his voice softened, though it remained cold. βYouβre a fool.β
You turned to face him, your eyes red and swollen. βWhy? Because I dared to want something else? Because I dared to love someone else? Even as a friend? My lord, I suffered for your sake. Being devoted to you like it is a law. It wasβ¦it was just a friend. A friend. And I cannot even have them. What am I to you, my lord? More thanβ¦more than someone who suffers worshiping you.β
He stared at you, his gaze penetrating, but he didnβt answer immediately. His fingers brushed against the bruised skin of your neck, and you flinched, but he didnβt pull away. There was a strange, almost possessive tenderness in his touch.
βYou think this makes you free?β Sukuna murmured, his voice low. βYouβre more mine now than you ever were before, little one.β
You shuddered, his words striking deep. βWhy?β you whispered, barely able to hold back the sob in your throat. βWhy do you care?β
Sukunaβs eyes burned with an intensity that made you tremble. βBecause youβre mine, little one.β he said, his voice a dangerous whisper. βAnd I do not let go of what is mine so easily.β
There was no warmth in his words, no comfort. But for the first time, you saw something raw in his eyesβsomething that looked dangerously close to vulnerability. You swallowed hard, your throat aching from both the bruises and the tears.Β
βThen why did you come?β
Sukunaβs expression shifted ever so slightly, and for a brief moment, you saw a flicker of something in his eyesβsomething like regret, though he would never admit it. You know that too well. Ten years of marriage to this cruel soul, this cursed man turned god β you would never hear those words of comfort. Not even if you asked.
βBecause I wonβt let you die, little one.β he said, his voice steady but quieter than you had ever heard it. βNot like this.β
You stared at him, your heart aching with too many conflicting emotions to name. In that moment, you realized something. You were trapped, not just by Sukunaβs power, but by the strange, twisted bond that tied you to him. He would never let you go. Not in life, not in death.
And that thought was more terrifying than anything else.
YOU COULDNβT HELP BUT STARE AT HIM. You werenβt fully recovered from your injuries just yet, but the healers had let you return to your daily life. You had just finished attending to your lord Sukuna in the audience hall. You stopped as he appeared before you, as you changed into more leisure clothing.Β
And you were unsure what he was saying to you. But the weight of Sukuna's words hung heavy in the air, his gaze as piercing as ever as he stood before you, his expression unreadable. He was not giving you anything, but orders. And youβre curious. As much as you were surprised.Β
βYou will take care of the child, little one.β he said, his tone brooking no argument.
Your breath caught in your throat. βA child? I know nothing about children, my lord.β
Sukunaβs crimson eyes narrowed slightly, a flicker of amusement in the corner of his lips. βYou will learn.β
For a moment, you stared at him, searching his face for any sign of the usual cruelty, but there was something different this time. This wasnβt a command born purely from spite or possessiveness. It felt heavier, more deliberate, as if he had considered this for a long time. You felt the familiar helplessness rise within you, the sense that you were powerless to refuse him.
βIβ¦ I will do as you ask, my lord.β you whispered, defeated. The words felt hollow, but they were the only ones you could manage. Sukuna merely nodded, his expression hard, before turning and leaving the room.
Days passed, and the dread settled deep in your bones as you waited for the child to arrive. You didnβt know what to expect, but Sukunaβs commands were absolute. There was no running from this.
And then, one morning, the child was brought to your chambers.
You stood at the door, frozen, as the small figure stepped forward. Your breath hitched in your chest as you looked down at the little girl before you. Her features were delicate, her long hair falling softly over her shoulders. She couldnβt have been more than five or six years old, but there was something far older in her gaze.
The child looked up at you, her eyes startlingly familiarβcrimson, like Sukunaβs. They stared into you with a haunting intensity that made your heart skip a beat. But it wasnβt just Sukunaβs eyes that made you pause. No, there was something else, something that chilled you to your core.
The girlβs face, though youthful and innocent, bore the unmistakable likeness of someone you thought youβd never see again.
Ryomen Hiromi.
Your heart clenched painfully, and the room seemed to spin for a moment. It was impossible, and yetβ¦ the girl standing before you had Hiromiβs faceβher soft features, her kind eyes, but mixed with the piercing gaze of Sukuna. Youβve seen enough of her statues all around the temple palace that youβre too certain.Β
You swallowed hard, struggling to comprehend what you were seeing. Your chest felt tight as memories of Hiromi flooded your mind, of the woman you had once known, the one who had been so important to Sukuna.
Ryomen Sukuna entered the room behind the child, his presence like a storm cloud looming over you both. He regarded you with cold detachment, though there was something in his gaze that suggested this was not a simple matter for him either.
βThis childβ¦..β Sukuna began, his voice calm but commanding. βis Hiromiβs daughter. The child she lost long ago.β
You stared at him, shock rippling through you. βHiromiβsβ¦ child?β
Sukuna nodded. βI found her soul.β he explained, his voice low and steady. βIt was not easy, but with the help of aβ¦ trusted friend, I was able to bring her back. Her body grew anew, and now, she is here. Alive. For me to keep, as her father.β
Your mind raced, struggling to grasp what he was saying. Sukuna had brought the child back from the deadβhad found her soul and, through some dark means, restored her. And now, this little girl, this child with Sukunaβs eyes and Hiromiβs face, stood before you.Β
And to be her father? Not only that, but to force you to be a mother. To raise her, knowing how much the ghost of her mother haunts you already. You do not know what to do. You could feel your lips still reflect a gaping hole, wide open in shock.
βWhy me?β you whispered, your voice barely audible. βWhy have you given her to me? Her motherβs kin still lives, my lord. Would they not want to knowββ
Sukunaβs gaze darkened, his eyes narrowing slightly. βIt does not matter what they want. You will raise her, little one.β he said simply. βYou will care for her as if she were your own.β
You took a step back, overwhelmed by the weight of his demand. βBut I donβt know how to care for a child, my lord Iββ
βYou will learn. You are not halfβwitted, arenβt you?β Sukuna interrupted, his voice sharp. βThere is no other choice. I have willed it. And you shall follow it.β
Your lips parted, but no words came out. You wanted to argue, to refuse, but you knew it was futile. There was no escaping Sukunaβs will. He had given you this child, and there was no turning back now.
The girl stood quietly between the two of you, her small hands clasped in front of her, watching the exchange with an unnerving calmness for someone her age. Her eyesβher fatherβs eyesβbore into you, as if she already knew more than you did, as if she carried the weight of her past life with her. Her motherβs face haunted you already. Why? Why must you be haunted like this?
βThis was Hiromiβs child. And I cherish her.β Sukuna said again, more softly this time, as if the words held a deeper significance for him. βNow, she is mine. Mine own daughter. You will raise her for me.β
You could only nod, the enormity of it all crashing down on you like a tidal wave. Sukunaβs presence was suffocating, but the childβs gaze was what unsettled you the most. It was as if Hiromiβs spirit lingered within her, a ghostly reminder of the life Sukuna had shared with her, of a woman who had meant more to him than perhaps you ever could.
And now, you were tasked with caring for the last piece of Hiromi that remained in this worldβa child born from tragedy, resurrected by Sukunaβs dark power.
βWhat is her name?β
He stops for a moment.
βChiharu.β He says in response. βRyomen Chiharu.β
βVery well, my lord. I willβ¦ do as you ask, my lord. I shall care for your child.β you whispered, your voice trembling as you looked down at the little girl. She met your gaze with those unnerving eyes, and you felt a strange chill creep up your spine.
Sukuna lingered for a moment longer, his gaze flicking between you and the child before turning to leave. As he walked away, his parting words echoed in your mind.
βDo not fail me in this.β
Days turned into weeks as you adjusted to the new rhythm of life with Chiharu, the little girl now under your care. At first, it felt surreal to be responsible for someone so precious yet so fragile, a living reminder of a past life you could barely comprehend. But as time passed, the weight of your circumstances began to feel lighter, replaced by a sense of purpose you hadnβt expected to find.
Young Chiharu was a curious child, with a spirit that seemed undaunted by the complexities of her existence. She often wandered the halls of the palace, her footsteps soft against the cold stone floors, exploring every corner with wide-eyed wonder. It was in those moments that you found yourself drawn to her, your heart softening as she chartered away, her laughter ringing like music in the otherwise somber atmosphere of the palace.
Every evening, you would sit together in the garden in the Vermillion hallβthe one place you had once avoided. Underneath the lush foliage, you would share stories, and slowly, you learned more about her.
Chiharu would speak of her dreams, her favorite flowers, and the little things that made her smile. She spoke of animals she wished to have, tales she had heard of distant lands, and the kindness she hoped to find in a world that had been cruel to her before.
As you listened to her, you found yourself revealing bits of your own life, your own fears and desires. With each passing day, the bond between you grew stronger, entwining like the vines in the garden. You shared laughter and quiet moments, and you began to feel a warmth blossom in your heartβa sense of family you had thought lost to you forever.
It was during one of these serene afternoons that Chiharu turned to you, her bright scarlet eyes glinting in the sunlight. βMama.β she said softly, her small hand reaching for yours.Β
The word felt foreign, yet sweet on her lips. Her mother was someone that she will never get to know again. You knew were not her mother, you knew that too well. But you felt a swell of warmth in your chest at the sound, as if she had bridged a gap that had long remained unfilled. You were not born to be a mother, you knew you would never be one. And yet, in her eyes β you were. You were born to be her mother.
βYes, my sweet little flower?β you replied, your heart fluttering at the connection that had formed between you.
βWhy did lord Sukuna name me Chiharu?β she asked, her gaze steady and curious.
You paused, contemplating how to answer her question. βChiharu means a thousand springs, little flower.β you explained gently. βItβs a beautiful name, one that speaks of new beginnings, renewal, and growth.β
The little girl tilted her head, a thoughtful expression crossing her face. βBut why did he choose that name for me?β
Your heart ached at the thought of Sukunaβs motivations. βI believe he saw something special in you. Perhaps he wanted to honor your connection to your past, to lady Hiromi. You are her child, Chiharu. And in a way, you are also a part of your lord father.β
βBut you are my mother.β You hear little Chiharu whisper.Β
You did not know what to say.Β
You try to recover from her words.
You smile, for her sake, you think.
But you smiled for your sake too.
βWe are both your mother.β You whispered back to her, putting her stray hair against the back of her ear. βBut I am the one here at this moment, little flower.β
You watch her eyes brighten at the thought. βTruly?β
βTruly.β You smiled wider at her.
βWhat about my father?β
βHm, what about my lord, little flower?β
Chiharuβs brow furrowed. βDo you think he loves me?β
The question caught you off guard. βI know he cares for you. Thatβs what I believe. In his own way, he has love.β But none for me.
Her small face lit up with a smile, though it was tinged with innocence and uncertainty. βI want to make him proud.β
A lump formed in your throat at her words. βYou already make me proud, sweet flower. And that is what matters most.β
The connection between you and the young girl continued to deepen, woven through shared moments and quiet revelations. You discovered that Chiharu had a talent for painting, her little hands creating vibrant images that brought life to the entirety of the Vermillion hall. And you could not help but find joy in such revelations.
You encouraged her to explore her creativity, and soon, the once-dim walls of your home were adorned with her colorful drawings, depicting flowers, animals, and fantastical creatures. Even if the servants were concerned, you waved such words away. The Vermillion hall looked brighter with the scarlet flowers she drew everywhere.
Ryomen Sukuna would occasionally visit, his presence like a thunderstorm that cast shadows over your peaceful existence. When he did, Chiharu would run to him, her bright scarlet eyes sparkling with delight.
Despite the tension that accompanied his visits, you could see that he had a soft spot for herβa fleeting warmth that illuminated his otherwise cold demeanor. He adored this young girl, more than you know. He had given her such warmth more than anyone you had ever seen.Β
One evening, as dusk settled over the Vermillion hall, Ryomen Chiharu presented one of her paintings to Sukuna, her little hands trembling with excitement. βLook, lord Sukuna!β she exclaimed, holding up a vibrant depiction of a cherry blossom tree, the one standing in the middle of your neverβending gardens. βItβs for you!β
Sukuna studied the painting, his expression inscrutable, but you could see the flicker of something in his eyes. Perhaps pride, perhaps surprise. βYouβve done well, little blossom.β he said, his tone low and steady. βYou had captured the ladyβs cherry blossom with exquisite likeness.β
The child beamed at his praise, her cheeks flushed with joy. βDo you like it?β
βIt isβ¦ acceptable, little blossom.β he replied, and though the words were blunt, there was a hint of approval lingering in his gaze. βI am certain that you will make more.β
You had wished that this was your life.
That you live forever in this moment.
But you knew better than to wish for that.
As the night deepened and the shadows in the grand hall stretched longer, Sukuna rose from his seat, his presence overwhelming as always. You called for Chiharu, who hesitated, her tiny face scrunching up in a pout. She clung to you, reluctant to leave, her voice soft, "I donβt want to go. My lord doesnβt come often anymoreβ¦ I want to tell him about my day."
You knelt down, brushing your fingers through her hair and smiling gently. "Heβll come tomorrow, just like he promised, little flower." you reassured her, though a small part of you doubted the certainty in your words. She needed that hope, even if it felt fragile.
With one last glance toward Sukuna, Chiharu allowed herself to be led away by the servants, her footsteps fading down the hall. Silence settled between you and Sukuna, thick and awkward at first. He didnβt look at you immediately, instead gazing out into the night through the open windows, as if lost in thought.
βYou take good care of her, little one.β Sukuna finally said, his tone gruff but softer than you expected. It was strange hearing thanks from himβit sounded unnatural coming from the King of Curses, yet there was sincerity in the rough edges of his words. "For thatβ¦ I thank you."
You blinked, the weight of his gratitude sinking in. It felt strange, almost surreal. Sukuna, of all people, expressing appreciation. You inclined your head, accepting it quietly. "Itβs nothing, my lord. She deserves the best care."
The silence that followed wasnβt uncomfortable this time, though. Instead, it felt like a mutual acknowledgment of the one thing you sharedβa fondness for Chiharu.
Youβll never love me. you thought, the truth of it sitting heavy in your heart. But you didnβt need to say it aloud. You already knew. Still, the small moments like these, where his walls slipped just enough for you to catch a glimpse of something more, were what you held onto. You treasured whatever you could get, however fleeting.
Sukunaβs gaze finally met yours. It was sharp, piercing as always, but there was something softer lingering beneath his usual coldness. "Iβll come tomorrow. Like I promised."
And for tonight, that was enough.
After he departed, you drank a little.Β
It was better to mourn what could not be early.
When Chiharu returned, well bathed and dressed for the night, the two of you sat together beneath the cherry blossom tree in the garden. She had to dry her hair before she could get some rest. Her small hands clutching the other painting she had made tightly.Β
βDo you think he really liked it?β she asked, her voice soft.
You smiled gently at her, cupping her face in your hands. βI believe he did. He may not show it, but he cares for you in his own way. You are a light in his life, little flower.β
Her eyes sparkled with hope, and for a moment, you felt a sense of unity in your small family, a connection that defied the darkness surrounding you.
As the petals fell around you like confetti, you realized that despite the chaos of your circumstances, you had created a sanctuary for both yourself and Chiharuβone filled with laughter, art, and the promise of new beginnings.
And in those moments, as the sun dipped below the horizon, you dared to believe that maybe, just maybe, you could carve out a piece of happiness amidst the shadows.
IT WAS JUST ANOTHER NIGHT. But it was still something that caused you grievance. As night fell and the palace was shrouded in silence, you found yourself restless, wandering the dimly lit halls, your thoughts heavy with the weight of your circumstances.
Chiharu slept peacefully in her little room, the faint glow of moonlight spilling through the window, casting soft shadows on her innocent face. You paused to watch her, a smile tugging at your lips, but it was quickly overshadowed by the familiar ache in your chest.
The truth was inescapable: no matter how much joy Ryomen Chiharu brought into your life, the shadow of Hiromi loomed over you like a specter. You couldnβt shake the feeling that everything she represented was a constant reminder of your own insignificance in Sukuna's world.
Hiromi had been the one to hold Sukuna's love, the one whose memory seemed to linger in every corner of the palace. She was the woman who had given him a childβa child who was now the light of his life, while you remained in the dark, clinging to scraps of his attention. It was a bitter thought that twisted in your mind, gnawing at your heart.
As you lay in bed, staring up at the intricately woven patterns on the ceiling, you couldnβt help but compare yourself to Hiromi. She had everything: his love, his devotion, a child who would carry a piece of her with her always. And what did you have? Nothing but the remnants of Sukunaβs affection, which felt more like an obligation than anything else.
You turned onto your side, burying your face in the pillow, trying to drown out the thoughts that haunted you. But the more you tried, the louder they became. You could still hear the echoes of his voice from earlier, the way he had looked at Chiharu with an intensity that made your heart clench.
He was a monster, but he was her fatherβsomeone who had chosen to resurrect her from the depths of despair. He had given her a life filled with warmth, while you were left with the remnants of a hollow existence.
βHiromi has everything in my lord Sukuna.β you whispered into the darkness, your voice trembling. βA dead woman, and I have nothing.β Tears slipped from your eyes, soaking the fabric of the pillow. βShe gave him a child, love, and he keeps it. And nothing of me.β
You couldnβt understand why it hurt so much. You had wanted to be close to Sukuna, to carve out a space in his heart that felt like home, but every time you looked at Chiharu, you were reminded of your failure. You were the one who existed in the shadows, the one who couldnβt compete with the memory of a woman long gone.
You closed your eyes, squeezing out the tears that felt like a dam breaking within you. Each drop felt like a piece of your heart spilling out onto the floor, a tangible reminder of your torment. You were grateful for Chiharu, but the bittersweet reality of your situation consumed you.
After what felt like hours of battling your own thoughts, you finally rose from your bed and made your way to the garden. The night air was cool against your skin, and you could hear the rustle of leaves in the gentle breeze. As you stepped into the moonlight, you were enveloped in a quiet stillness, yet it did little to ease your turmoil.
You found yourself standing beneath the cherry blossom tree, its delicate petals fluttering like whispers in the wind. It was a beautiful sight, but it only deepened the ache in your chest. You remembered how Chiharuβs eyes had sparkled with excitement when she painted that tree, how her laughter had filled the air like music.
But even as you admired its beauty, you couldnβt escape the lingering shadow of Hiromi. βWhy do you haunt me?β you murmured, your voice breaking as you gazed up at the stars. βWhy canβt I escape your memory?β
You sank to your knees beneath the tree, your fingers brushing against the cool earth. βI donβt want to compete with you.β you whispered, your heart aching with the weight of your confession. βI just want to be enoughβ¦ for him, for Chiharu.β
The wind picked up, rustling the leaves above you, and in that moment, it felt as though the world held its breath. You could almost hear Hiromiβs laughter, see her warm smileβa gentle reminder of the life she had once lived.
A tear rolled down your cheek, and you let it fall, feeling the weight of your grief and jealousy wash over you. You had tried so hard to be strong, to forge a bond with Chiharu, but the reality of your situation loomed like a dark cloud, threatening to engulf you.
As you knelt there, surrounded by the whispers of the night, you could feel Sukunaβs presence looming in the back of your mind. He was a force of nature, a tempest that left destruction in its wake, and you were caught in the storm.
βWill I ever matter to you?β you asked softly, the question lingering in the cool night air. The silence answered you, an empty echo of your unfulfilled desires.
The moonlight bathed the garden in a soft glow, but no matter how beautiful it was, the ache in your heart remained. You rose to your feet, wiping the tears from your face, knowing that you had to keep moving forwardβfor Chiharuβs sake, if not your own.
Tomorrow would bring new challenges, and you would face them with the strength you found in your love for the little girl who had unexpectedly entered your life. But tonight, in the shadow of a woman you could never compete with, you allowed yourself to grieveβgrieve for what could never be, for the love that felt so far out of reach.
As you made your way back to your chambers, the weight of Hiromiβs legacy still pressed on your heart, but you clung to the hope that perhaps, one day, you could carve your own place in this worldβone that belonged to you, and to Chiharu.
YOU WERE EXHAUSTED FROM THE WORK ALL DAY. But as the lord summoned you, you were inclined to attend to him. That is just how it was. It has been two years now, since Hironobu, since Chiharu had come to live with you.
And a lot had since changed with the way you and Sukuna existed together. Perhaps, it is what it is. This is all that is left. You think you would like to be content with that.
The evening was cloaked in a haze of amber light as you and Sukuna sat across from each other in the dimly lit chambers, the air thick with tension. A selection of fine spirits lay on the table between you, remnants of a night that had spiraled into a blur of laughter and inebriation. But the laughter had faded, leaving behind a bitter residue that clung to your heart.
You raise your glass, your hand slightly unsteady as you downed another shot, the liquid fire coursing down your throat. It was supposed to be a moment of camaraderie, an attempt to bridge the growing chasm between you. Instead, it felt like a catalyst, igniting the frustrations that had been building within you.
Sukuna watched you with a bemused expression, but there was a glint in his eyesβsomething predatory, something that made your heart race. Fueled by the alcohol and the raw emotion coursing through you, you slammed your glass down on the table, the sound echoing in the silence.
"You took everything I have!" you slur drunkenly, your voice breaking as the words tumbled out. "I gave you everything I had, and I am miserable because of it!"
Sukunaβs brows furrowed, and for a moment, the playful smirk slipped from his face, replaced by a flicker of confusion. But you pressed on, the anger and despair and somehow bitter laughter mingling in a toxic blend that fueled your fury.
"You made me miserable with you! The one shot of joy I have in my lifeβsomeone who could care for meβand you take him away from me? What have I done to you to make me suffer like this, my lord?"
The room seemed to spin, the walls closing in around you as the weight of your words settled heavily in the air. The tears that had been threatening to spill finally broke free, cascading down your cheeks as you fought against the sorrow that threatened to engulf you.
"I regret you, sometimes! Everything of you, I regret!" you cried, the confession tearing from your lips like a wounded animal. A laugh escapes you. βAh, I am driven mad. I thoughtβ¦.I thought to be content but somehow, I kept thinking and thinking. The questions of what if I had chosen some other path.β
Sukunaβs expression hardened, his eyes narrowing as he took in your words. You could see the tumult of emotions playing across his faceβanger, frustration, maybe even hurt. But he didnβt speak, and the silence hung heavy between you.
βYou think this is easy for me?β he finally said, his voice low and dangerous. βYou think I wanted to hurt you?β
You shook your head, your heart pounding in your chest. βYou have no idea what itβs like! To live in the shadow of someone who came before me! To feel like Iβm constantly competing with a ghost!β
The bitterness of your words filled the room, and you could see the flicker of something deep within him. A flicker of regret? Anger? It was hard to tell. What could there be left between two people who donβt talk? What could be left between two people who donβt understand each other well, and yet pretend they do?
βYou think I donβt suffer too?β he challenged, his voice rising little by little. βYou think I donβt care about you?β
You paused, the anger momentarily dissipating as you searched his face for any hint of sincerity. But all you saw was the monsterβthe god, the force of nature that had swept into your life and turned everything upside down.
βThen why do you make me feel like this?β you whispered, the vulnerability in your voice cutting through the tension. βWhy canβt you just let me be happy? With Hironobuβ¦ with Chiharuβ¦ with anyone?β
A shadow crossed Sukunaβs face, and for a moment, it felt like you had struck a chord. But he quickly masked it, his expression turning cold once more. βHironobu is nothing to me. He is weak, a distraction.β
βThat βdistractionβ makes me happy!β you yelled, frustration spilling over once more. βHe cares for me in a way you never could! He makes me feel like I matter!β
Sukunaβs gaze hardened, but beneath that facade, you could see the conflict churning. You took a step forward, your heart racing. βI donβt want to be your pawn anymore. I donβt want to be a part of your world if it means losing everything I love!β
The air crackled with tension as the two of you faced each other, the weight of your words hanging between you. And then the dam broke. You collapsed into tears, the alcohol amplifying your emotions as you fell to your knees, sobs wracking your body. The tears spilled unchecked, your heart breaking under the weight of it all.
βI hate this!β you cried out, your voice muffled by the floor. βI hate feeling like this! I hate you!β
Sukuna stood frozen, a statue of power and control as he watched your breakdown unfold. But as your cries filled the room, something shifted within him.
He took a step closer, his presence looming over you like a storm cloud, and yet, despite the turmoil, you felt a flicker of something moreβsomething like concern.
βGet up, little one.β he commanded softly, his voice low and steady. βYouβre stronger than this.β
But you shook your head, your heartache spilling over. βI donβt want to be strong anymore. I just want to be free.β
There was a moment of silence as you both stood at the edge of a precipice, and for the first time, you could see the weight of your shared pain reflected in his eyes.
βIβm sorry.β he said finally, the words heavy with unspoken understanding. βYou know it well, little one. I will never set you free.β
You didnβt know if he was apologizing for Hiromi, for Hironobu, or for the pain you both carried, but it was a start. You slowly rose to your feet, wiping your tears, though the hurt still lingered in your chest. You think that it doesnβt matter anymore. It never does.
Sukuna stood before you, an imposing figure, but in that moment, you could see the man behind the monster. The flicker of vulnerability lingered in the depths of his gaze, an acknowledgment of the bond that tethered you both to a past neither of you could escape.
βI may never be what you want me to be, little one.β he murmured. βBut I wonβt take away your happiness again.β
You looked into his eyes, searching for sincerity, and for the first time, you felt the hope of a fragile truce forming between you. It was a small step, but it was a step nonetheless, one that could lead you both out of the darkness and into the lightβif only you could find the strength to keep moving forward.
The air was thick with unspoken emotions as you and Sukuna stood facing each other, the weight of your words still hanging heavily in the silence. His gaze bore into yours, a mix of intensity and something softer that made your heart race. You felt as if you were standing on a precipice, caught between the fear of falling and the desire to soar.
βI want to believe you, my lord.β you said quietly, the tremor in your voice betraying the storm of emotions still raging within. βBut you have to understandβ¦ every time you pull me closer, it feels like youβre pushing me away. I canβt live like thisβconstantly afraid of losing everything.β
Sukunaβs expression shifted, a flicker of regret passing over his features. βI never meant to hurt you, little one.β he replied, his voice low. βBut my world is not kind, and I canβtβ¦..I canβt be what you want me to be. I cannot be kind to you.β
βBut thatβs just it!β you exclaimed, frustration bubbling up once more. βYouβre so powerful, yet you let this darkness consume you! You wield it like a weapon, and Iβm the one left in the crossfire! Why am I always suffering for your sake?β
He took a step closer, the space between you diminishing as he searched your face for understanding. βI am a monster, little one.β he said, his voice raw. βI have done terrible thingsβthings that haunt me. But I never wanted to drag you into that darkness. You deserve to be happy. Butβ¦.it is not meant to be. And we areβ¦we are stuck together, whether you like it or not, in this cage.β
βThen why does it feel like youβre the one who keeps me from it?β you challenged, your heart racing. βIβm so tired of living in your shadow, of feeling like a mere afterthought in your life. Every time I see you with Chiharu, it reminds me that I am just a placeholderβa ghost of a memory that doesnβt matter.β
His jaw tightened, and for a moment, you feared you had pushed too far. But then he reached out, his hand brushing against your arm, the warmth of his touch igniting something deep within you.
βI donβt want to lose you, little one.β he said, his voice a husky whisper. βYouβve brought something into my life I never knew I needed. But it terrifies me. And I justβ¦.I will not let you go.β
You felt your breath hitch, a rush of emotions swirling within you. βThen show me, my lord.β you pleaded, your heart pounding in your chest. βShow me that I matter to you. Donβt make me feel like Iβm just a convenience. I want to be more than that.β
His gaze softened, and for a fleeting moment, the god before you was just a manβa man struggling with his own demons, much like you. βI donβt know how anymore, little one.β he admitted, vulnerability lacing his words. βBut I will try.β
The sincerity in his eyes pierced through the haze of your hurt and resentment. You had spent so long fighting against the current, desperately trying to find your footing in a world that seemed intent on pulling you under. But standing here, facing Sukuna, you realized that maybeβjust maybeβthere was a chance for something more, something real.
βIβm scared too, my lord.β you confessed, your voice trembling as the weight of your emotions threatened to crush you. βScared that youβll change your mind, scared that Iβll lose everything again. Or maybe you would kill me. But I canβt keep hiding from you. I cannot keep finding ways to escape you.β
The sincerity in your admission hung in the air between you, a fragile thread woven from the strands of your broken heart. Sukunaβs expression darkened as he processed your words, his usually confident demeanor faltering just slightly. He nodded slowly, his brow furrowed in contemplation.Β
βI know that too well, little one.β He brushes your hair away from your face. βI know it all.β
His voice was steady, almost soothing, but the underlying tension crackled like static in the air. You took a deep breath, a sense of resolve building within you. βI want to believe you, my lord.β you said softly, each word laced with the weight of your doubt. βBut you know that you are not speaking trueβ¦ you lie as easily as you breathe.And I drown loving you like its law and hating you for how you taught me to love you.β
The admission feel like a heavy stone between you, and you could see the flicker of something in his eyesβperhaps regret, perhaps anger. But you didnβt back down. You needed him to hear the truth, the raw, unvarnished reality of your existence.
βItβs as if youβre a tempest.β you continued, your voice rising with the heat of your frustration. βOne moment youβre this powerful force, sweeping me off my feet, promising me the world, and the next, Iβm left to drown in the chaos you create. You wield your power like a weapon, and Iβm the one caught in the crossfire.β
His jaw clenched, and you could see the internal struggle etched on his face. βI never meant to hurt you, little one.β he said, but the words felt hollow, echoing through the chasm of pain that separated you.
βAnd yet youβre the architect of my suffering.β you challenged, your heart pounding in your chest. βYou brought me into your world. And all Iβve knownβ¦is misery. You say you want me by your side, but you torture me. You kill me, everyday.β
The vulnerability in your voice cut through the tension like a blade, and you saw his expression shift. There was something thereβsomething that hinted at the turmoil he carried beneath his godlike exterior.Β
βYouβre not just a concubine to me.β he said, his tone softer, but the intensity of his gaze never wavered. βYou mean more than you know.β
βMore than what?β you spat, your anger flaring up once more. βMore than a passing fancy? A moment of respite from your endless hunger for power? I am not a toy for you to play with, my lord. Iβm not just a distraction from your demons, your misery. You want me to believe that I matter. Youβre using me to fill the void left by Hiromi.β
The name hung in the air, heavy with the ghosts of the past, and you could see the shift in Sukunaβs expressionβa flicker of pain, a crack in his facade. βYou donβt understandβ¦β he started, but you cut him off, needing to vent the storm of hurt and betrayal swirling within you.
βUnderstand what?β you cried, your voice breaking. βThat Iβm just a shadow in the light of a dead woman? That every moment I spend with you is tainted by her memory? You keep her close, a constant reminder of what I can never be. She gave you a child, loveβeverything I yearn for from you these past few years but canβt have. I feel like Iβm drowning in your past while you expect me to be grateful for whatever scraps of affection you throw my way.β
For a heartbeat, the silence swallowed you both, the air thick with tension and unshed tears. Sukunaβs eyes bore into yours, a tempest of emotions raging beneath the surfaceβfrustration, desire, regret. βI donβt want to lose you, little one.β he said, the words almost a whisper.
βAnd yet you keep pushing me away, my lord.β you shot back, your heart aching with the truth. βYou think you can keep me at armβs length, and Iβll just accept it? You canβt keep pulling me in with one hand while pushing me away with the other. I need to know that I am more than just a fleeting moment for you!β
βIβm trying!β he shouted, his voice rising, but the urgency in it didnβt mask the vulnerability. βYou donβt understand the things Iβve done, the things Iβm capable of! Iβve been alive for a long time, and you are the first to accept what I am. I am trying to keep you, little one. I need you.β
His raw honesty pierced through the fog of your emotions, and you felt your heart crack a little more. βLet me go, my lord.β you whispered, the weight of your own words settling heavily on your chest. βLet me be free of this burden youβve placed on me. I want to be happy, but I canβt find that happiness in the shadow of your misery upon me.β
βI canβt.β he replied, desperation lacing his voice. βI wonβt. Youβre a part of me now, whether you want to be or not.β
You shook your head, tears spilling down your cheeks as the reality of your situation sank in. βBut Iβm not sure I want to be part of thisβ¦ this nightmare anymore.β you said, your voice breaking. βIβm tired, my lord. Tired of fighting for a love that feels more like a battlefield than a sanctuary.β
With every word, your resolve crumbled a little more, and you felt the exhaustion wash over you like a tide. The weight of your feelings, the burden of past traumas, and the constant strain of navigating the unpredictable depths of your relationship with Sukuna were too much to bear. You wanted to be strong, to stand your ground and fight for something better, but fatigue was clawing at the edges of your consciousness.
You could see the struggle reflected in his eyesβan intense mixture of determination and sorrow. But even in the heat of your argument, you sensed that his heart was also heavy with burdens he carried alone. You took a shaky breath, desperate for release from this tumultuous cycle of emotions.
As the exhaustion settled deeper into your bones, you felt your eyelids growing heavy, the fight within you slowly extinguishing. βI justββ you started, but the words faded as you succumbed to the comforting darkness that beckoned you.
βJust rest.β Sukuna murmured, his voice a soothing balm against the chaos of your thoughts. βYou need to let go for a moment. Iβll be here when you wake.β
His voice wrapped around you like a cocoon, and despite the turmoil of your heart, you found solace in his presence. With one last shuddering breath, you finally surrendered to the pull of sleep, the weight of your burdens slipping away as your consciousness faded into the comforting embrace of oblivion.
In the morning, you know that nothing will change.
In the morning, you will still be miserable with him.
In the morning, youβll love him like he is the law.
In the morning, youβll worship him as religion taught.
In the morning, youβll never be able to be free from him.
This is actually the context for this pic guys trust me my uncle works at mihoyo
Come back home
May I request a fake dating scenario with Childe? (sorry i know its cliche but its my favorite tropeπ) Perhaps he and f reader are on an undercover mission to gain intel at a function, like a dinner party or a festival of some sort, and Childe is way more interested in committing to the bit than the mission itself. Like, he intentionally took on an easy mission so that he could indulge in his time with the reader because he "takes his job seriously" or something like thatπ
Fatui operative reader*
β
βYou said youβd take this seriously.β You chided him, pushing for the fifth time his hand away from your hip while you looked through the crowd for your target. It should have been a rather easy mission: get close enough to the ambassador that theyβll tell you about the incoming shipment. Once you got what you needed youβd inform the other operatives waiting near the docks, theyβd sneak in during the night and lift all the goods before anyone grew wise to the situation. However, after much pestering from a specific Harbinger, this simple task was turning into a headache inducing nightmare.
βI am, dear.β He ran his finger over your ear and out of your peripherals you caught sight of the calculating grin that pulled one side of his lips.
βYou donβt have to pretend right now, no ones looking at us.β Pretending to rummage through your pouch, you noticed a esteemed looking figure walking through the door, someone as elegantly dressed as that must be your ambassador. βSheβs here.β You whispered, nudging your chin in her direction and slipping the money pouch back in your side bag. βLetβs get closer.β
βDonβt get to hasty, letβs see what she does.β Childe moved behind you, his hand sliding over your back and making you hyper aware of each and every inch he occupied. His chest somehow so noticeable even though he never touched you with it, the proximity of him as he leaned against the wall and draped his arm over your shoulder before pulling you closer made your brain fuzzy and, for a moment, you lost sight of her. βCan you make out what sheβs saying?β He spoke in a lower tone, an attempt to keep his words only for you or β¦ was he trying to make you shiver.
Carefully, you focused your attention on her lips. Eyes squinting against the light as you tried to decipher what she was saying. The expression on her face shifted from one of familiarity to irritation, but it was so slight and quickly replaced by a smile her companion never caught it. βSheβs upset.β
βWhy?β
You opened your mouth to explain only to be cut off by his arm sliding off your shoulder so his hand could run down your back. The slow trail he made up and down your spine made you furious; you were trying to do your job, trying to get what you needed and to not be swayed, distracted by the pounding of your heart or the hot breaths you took while sharing the intel. βSh-sheβs asking why the shipments late.β Stopping his hand with your clenching fingers, you pushed his wrist back toward his chest and swore you heard a soft giggle at your side. Coughing, you continued. βIt looks like heβs telling her itβll be here soon.β
βAre the goods on the boat, look closely.β With a sigh, you strained your eyes to see, took in everything that you could in order to see her mouth form the shapes you needed to see.
βYes!β You shouted a little louder than you anticipated and, because of that, the ambassadors turned toward you. You felt completely see-through under her eyes, a stab of fear shot through your heart when she looked at you, directly at you. In one fell swoop, Childe lifted you in the air and spun you around so much you lost your balance and you werenβt even using your own legs. βCh-!β
βYou said yes!! Youβve made me the happiest man in the world.β He let you slide down his chest but before you could fully grasp it all, he moved in and soon your lips were covered by his. The tight grip you had on his shoulders began to relax, your toes touched the ground but he continued to hold you; arms wrapped around your body, mouth commanding yours with lips so heavy you wondered how he exerted so much pressure onto them. When he released you, the air in your lungs came rushing in all at once while your mind did itβs best to refocus.
Things faded in slowly. Childeβs thank youβs to an applauding crowd, the drifting sound of your heart as it began to slow, the heat of your cheeks as you hid against his chest.
βSheβs gone, we should follow her just in case.β He whispered into your hair, hand resting against your back while yours shook against his chest.
βYou did that on purpose.β
βWhat makes you say that, comrade.β Lifting your eyes to see him, taking in every ounce of deviousness that radiated off his skin, you knew this partnership would be the death of you.
βYo-you shouldnβt tease people like that.β
βAm I not allowed to tease my sweetheart? Whereβs the fun in that.β
βIβm not really your sweetheart, remember.β
βWho says?β Childe ran his fingers over your ear until they found the back of your neck and you swore his intentions were clear as he leaned in for another kiss. Why was he so good at this fake dating ruse, it wasnβt fair. Your heart shouldnβt be so affected by this and yet β¦
βChilde β¦β Your eyes fluttered closed and you prepared for a kiss that never came. βChilde?β
βExpecting something, comrade? Our friends getting away.β Everything slammed back together as if he had slowly pulled you apart moments ago; how was he able to do that so easily? Frustrated, you clenched your jaw and pushed past him but when he ran after you only to slip his hand into yours it took everything you had to hold back a confused and irritated scream building in your throat while he easily let fall laughter that made your heart weak.
LOVE IS A SONG β¦
DO I WANT YOU BECAUSE YOUβRE WONDERFUL, / OR ARE YOU WONDERFUL / BECAUSE I WANT YOU? the prestigious teyvat arts academy is once again hosting their annual musical production, and for you? well, youβre gunning for the lead roleβ cinderella. but something throws a tomato in your star spotlight time when you find out that long-time crush, scaramouche, has been casted as prince fucking charming. cue the βK-I-S-S-I-N-Gβ chorus!
love is a song, a scaramouche x reader smau. reader plays the role of cinderella but is referred to by with they/them pronouns. spoilers for: scaramoucheβs, childeβs & signoraβs real names. tags: uni! theatre kids! oh-my-fucking-god yβall just pining AND oblivious! swearing (if it ainβt obvious already)! ooc characters (literally all of them except childe)!
STATUS: on - going UPDATES: whenever i feel like it disregard time-stamps & interactions (too lazy to put in likes & stuff just pretend they are there)
MASTERLIST
κ° teaser κ±
κ° prologue κ±Β me, who am i? ( i / ii )
act i.
κ° one κ± Β the prince is giving a ball
κ° two κ± Β cinderella march
κ° three κ± Β in my own little corner
κ° four κ± Β your majesties
κ° five κ± Β boys and girls like you and me
κ° six κ± Β impossible; itβs possible
act ii.
κ° seven κ± Β gavotte
κ° eight κ± Β ten minutes ago
κ° nine κ± Β stepsistersβ lament
to be continued β¦
TAGLIST : @keqinxxΒ @scaradocs @scaramewΒ @yuuriihiimeΒ @shxnosuke @softmintyΒ @iamnotgrootforiamthorΒ @its-romani-bitch @starglitterz @to-mi-yo @diestheticu @lumpywolfΒ @butter-gun @sunflower3216 @annoying-and-upsetΒ @kazu-topia @gorouswrld @tori-kk @m1kotsuΒ @cotton-eeeβ @cafescaraβ + if youβre bolded i cannot tag you!
TAG : l.ove is a song
Tiny Crown