i was a lover, you were a lesson.
DRAWER.
I get the feeling and a strange sense,
that you’re glad that I escaped, that from there I left.
When our towns daily newspaper had talked about me,
I wonder if you bought that edition to see.
I wonder if somewhere you hide a secret drawer,
where you keep your memories and regrets,
Movie tickets, funeral cards,
newspaper clippings, and cassettes.
Do you go through that drawer while sitting on the couch,
The one my mother designed from the catalog?
That couch that has seen you through three marriages now,
The same one your new wife sits on?
I wonder what the difference between us is,
why we are the way that we are,
We don’t have many similarities;
The contrast is so stark.
Your opportunities were boundless,
You could’ve done anything,
your parents were married and owned their home,
you played sports in the spring.
But me, I didn’t have those privileges,
and it’s all because of you,
my childhood I spent bounced back-and-forth,
you divorced when I was two.
Mom raised me independently,
and independent I was raised to be.
Everything I’ve done is no part thanks to you.
Its all been because of me.
But even all these years later,
I know you’ve watched, and listened to the grapevine.
Even after everything that’s happened,
you’ve been proud of me all this time.
I wonder if someday when you’re gone and when I get that call,
I’ll go over to your place, survey, and start to comb through all,
your personal belongings, prized possessions, and some more,
But I wonder more than anything, if I’ll ever find that drawer…
LOVE, DEAR ABBY
I want so badly to talk to you, but have no idea what to even say.
LOVE, DEAR ABBY
“I wish I could tell you I miss you, but you aren’t that person anymore.”
- abby
“I miss the person I used to be when I had you.”
Sorry about the clothes on my back being in the way when you stabbed me
“i gave the clothes off my back, just for you to stab me.”
- abby
…
second 🌕
sixth
fourteenth 🌕
thirtieth
LOVE, DEAR ABBY
“fool me once: shame on you.
“fool me twice: well, now you can’t since i have trust issues.”
“I stand outside looking at the moon, thinking of you somewhere also bathed in its light.”
“i don’t know what’s worse: to have lost them, or to have never had them at all…”
“i do. it’s to know which way it was…”
- abby