Before Twitter Goes, Here’s My Favorite Tweet Of All Time

*walks out of the homoerotic friendship covered in blood and wounds* you should see the other guy

You’ve been hit by

new year's resolutions

- don't die

- get even gayer

- get an even weirder gender

- reach out to my friends more

harry du bois steps up to the lectern in front of the crowd. "as a lesbian...." he pauses, looks at kim questioningly. kim shakes his head imperceptibly. harry looks back at the audience "...supporter"

“uwu... BEAN”

my best tip for anyone trying to get back into reading is to remember that you can read books to avoid other responsibilities in ur life and it can become a vice if you play your cards right

I know you wanted me away But I am called to be the first Pope from the USA I heard that there's a special place where God talks directly to me every time I pray

I'm having holy dreams, of ruling the Holy See Hear Santa Monica, her son is calling me Won't make the bishops proud, the USCCB Will see their bro in Christ, I know they're gonna scream

"God, what will you do? You once were our boy, then you went to Peru," oh Fathers I'm on the balcony In my vestments, they elected me as the

you! guy who likes fictional lesbians to the point of feeling a strange sense of pain! you can be a lesbian. but there are some steps you have to complete first

some of you bitches deserve a nap and a milkshake tbh

you're in her dms. i'm in the repair bay casting spells. we are not the same