My Oil Painting Of An Uncrustable

TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!

autistically mourning pangea think of all the train potential

To the witches with chronic illnesses:

Please remember to be kind to yourself today. If you can't get up to do that spell you planned, that's okay. If you can't gather enough mental focus to meditate today, that's okay. If you can't even gather enough strength to get out of bed, that's okay. If you can't get up to light deity candles, that's okay. They won't hate you for it. They will understand.

Allow yourself to rest. Even if you didn't do anything yesterday, allow yourself to rest. Your body will let you know when it's ready to do things. Even if that's only to do small, simple things. Your body will tell you.

Please, allow yourself to rest. You've got this! ❤️

As a kid, I wasn't taught any concept that there's a difference between wanting to do something, and enjoying it. I was a largely unsupervised kid with undiagnosed ADHD and parents who expected their kids to just raise themselves on their own. So when I was capable of spending hours drawing or reading a fun book, but couldn't even remember that I had homework, ever, I was told that I simply didn't want to do well in school. And who was I to question that, I'm eight years old.

Enjoyment and passion were the only forms of motivation I knew, and if I couldn't make myself either love doing boring math homework as much as I loved my hobbies, or force myself to push through things I hated with sheer willpower alone because I want to succeed so bad, then clearly I was simply not as good as all the other kids, who could do that. And that attitude carried onto adulthood. Every time I struggled to muster genuine love and passion into something, I thought that I just don't want it badly enough. Not to enough to love it, or to suffer through it.

Being medicated for the first time was a game changer. Like holy shit, so this is your brain on dopamine. And suddenly I wanted to do things, turned my life around, took up the passion career I had never dared to try. And when the first "honeymoon phase" of the meds wore down, the same fear came back - I don't like this anymore, do I not want it bad enough? What else could I possibly want?

And I shit you not I was literally 30 years old when I understood that life isn't just either loving every minute of pursuing a passion that you love, or joylessly dragging yourself through things that you don't even want to do. I can just tell myself "just because I don't like doing this doesn't mean I don't want to be doing it." It's not a mark of failure, weakness or lack of motivation, if sometimes the career you want to be doing just feels like having a job.

academic who writes a paper and just puts "credit to original author :)" for all their citations

nb people are members of the fae

So.... Yeah

The moral of Matilda is that if you’re autistic enough you can destroy your enemies with your mind

my one skill socially as an autistic person is my ability to adapt to any situation by just going "sure I guess this is happening!"

i live my life in a constant state of social confusion and it has made me incredibly good at just going with the flow even if the flow befuddles me and im only really putting in guess work at best.

Hilma af Klint (Swedish, 1862-1944) - On the Viewing of Flowers and Trees, Untitled (Vid betraktande av blommor och träd), Watercolor on paper, 18 x 25 cm (1922)