There Will Be A Day - Jeremy Camp

Annie Spratt

source: califlowers magazine

Merry Christmas!

Hey, everybody! Sorry I've been gone so long, both here and with my phone. I've been doing a lot of writing music and a lot less poetry, so I might change the general attire of this blog soon. I hope you lovely people are having wonderful holidays, and that whatever it is you celebrate went incredibly well. I, myself, celebrate Christmas, and it was a total blowout for me! I not only got the freaking beautiful BOSE headphones that I asked for from my grandparents and uncle, but also a gorgeous mini-speaker from my parents (also by BOSE) that connects via Bluetooth. It's ridiculous how spoiled I am. :3 Let me know in a message what's been going on with you guys! I may or may not have my phone around, for those that have my phone number. I'm visiting a lot of family, and it's been a bit exhausting. Sadly, I've become unable of going to sleep before midnight without doing something, and this just happens to be it tonight. Also, there will be a sledding "party" (could you imagine me actually throwing any kind of real party? That would not go well at all.) after school someday behind Aurora High School. All are invited. It will probably be during exam time, so we can all go to our exam and just bring snow gear with us and then use it to the edge of its spontaneous combustion from pure awesomeness. I wonder if any of this is actually making sense right now.

TL;DR -I'm not dead -I probably won't have my phone for a bit yet -Sledding at my school during exams

https://youtu.be/lhLEVujFkSU

Hey I’ve been making some music on YouTube again here’s my latest release

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Spare Change

The dimly lit chapel is silent. If my grandmother were still alive, she would be the only one crying for her son. People like my father, who was sometimes irrationally poetic, never take into account their cause of death when asking for an open casket funeral. I guess having the shit beaten out of you over a gambling debt doesn’t cross one’s mind as the way they’re going to die. I can’t say I never wished it on him though.

I’m standing at the back of the sanctuary, partially watching the people come to pay respects, partially lost in thought. There are few enough attenders that I can still see his coffin; simple and bright, like he was once. I truly thought I loved my father, but he was not a good man, in the end. The last two years were rough; learning that my father would sell out his family was rough. We weren’t slaves, but we would’ve been on the streets if I hadn’t dropped out of college to get a job. Hell, we all had to drop things; we had to sell my little brother Jamie’s piano. I’ll probably hate myself the rest of my life for taking that away from him, but I’d be damned if I let him starve. All our bills and costs now aren’t a quarter of what he took to throw at cards. I was relieved when I found out he bit it; I’ll probably hate myself a long time for that too.

I’ve made my way to the middle of the aisle, where Jamie’s standing. He hugs me tight, resting his head on my chest. Fourteen’s an awkward age where he understands what’s happening, but he doesn’t know how to deal with it. I imagine we could have been good friends if we’d have more time these last couple years, but I’ve been working and he’s been hiding up in his room; he really looked up to dad.

Dad. It’s a foreign word to me. I suppose I haven’t said it in well over a year, I haven’t really thought of him like that in so long. Hopefully Jamie still does, or did. It’s still weird he’s gone.

When I was nine, we made a bet, my dad and I. My baby brother had just been born, and I was upset because I thought I was going to be replaced by him. He bet me three bucks that Jamie would never replace me. Being nine, I didn’t understand what it meant to make that kind of bet, but I’m not ignorant to it now.

I find myself standing by my father’s body, some people looking at me, maybe waiting for me to say something. I reach into my pocket and grab a fiver; drop it in with him.

“Keep the change.”

Fairytale