They’re Lucky That WoL Left Her Guard Dog Back In Eorzea

people r saying the pranged role quests are the weakest and that’s probably true but to me they were worth absolutely everything bc the turali people are like ‘well, you’re a strong enough adventurer, maybe together we have a very slight chance of standing up to these people please help 🥺’ and then you go back to gyr abania and that one resistance person is like ‘Warrior of Light. Look at me-no no no, Look At Me. You Can Not Vaporize these petty thieves you’re going after. do you understand me. I need you at your worst grey parse. I want you to use the first button on your hotbar and NOTHING else. tell me you understand. you Can Not just fucking Vaporize these guys like you normally do.’

and I just have to believe your turali pal is like. what.

Seeing it postulated that Zenos' dying wish, his strongest final emotion that shaped the dynamis around him to manifest WoLs transporter- was born of genuine wanting that WoL may yet live on.

Because he showed in his final challenge speech that he finally understood that WoL doesn't want to burn their life for the sake of it, that they still have so much to live for. So in gifting him the end he sought, he gifts us a new beginning in return.

Survive.

happy lesbians

Vrtra really said "Even here have we heard of the Scions of the Seventh Dawn" like he wasn't having Thavnair intelligence scooping up every detail of anything and everything to do with Louisoix Leveilleur the second he heard Bahamut hatched and was ready to glass Eorzea and Some? Mortal??? from Sharlayan managed to almost tank the blow

Ahewann, sprinting out of the meghaduta into the town square: I Need The Sharlayan Ambassador Right The Fuck Now

Five, six years later and the intel squads say the Scions have imploded, except whoops no they haven't they've snuck out of the regicide accusations into Ishgard and have disappeared into Dravania trying to end the Dragonsong War? pffff yeah good luck with that Nidhogg's been filling up my inbox for a thou- WAIT WHAT? WHO?? AND THE LEVEILLEUR GRANDSON???

Ahewann, sprinting straight to the Ishgardian consulate without stopping: Hey Uh Can You Tell Me What, and please understand this is very important, The Fuck

Then for a short bit family matters quiet down, again, maybe. Estinien "Not Not Nidhogg" Wyrmblood passes through Thavnair but moves on to Othard pretty quickly. Ahewann gratefully takes off his running shoes and Vrtra peels himself off the ceiling like a scared cat from worrying which would be worse to meet, Estinien or Nidhogg. Midgardsormr dies again but that's less of a big deal than it should be, he'll sleep it off. Tiamat is suddenly flying again for the first time in five millenia so that's . . . good, the world is ending but that's good at least. Estinien Wyrmblood may or may not have joined the Scions, no one can get a solid confirmation. Anyway he's got to get these scales to the alchemists, the Baldesion reps are coming soon, he can't focus on his own family drama right now-

He looks up and standing before him is an Archon astrologian in a bathrobe, another Archon nerd cosplaying as a gunbreaker, two Archons oh this must be the Baldesion group, [INSERT INSANE PLAYER CHARACTER APPEARANCE], well they look . . . interesting, are they imitating the Warrior of Light? and an Ishgardian dra -

Vrtra, malms away in the meghaduta: A

Vrtra: Ahewann

Vrtra: Ahewann we've got a Code Leveilleur situation here

Ahewann: What?

Vrtra: THE SCIONS ARE HERE

Vrtra: ESTINIEN WYRMBLOOD IS H E R E

Vrtra: GET YOUR SHOES ON AHEWANN HOW DID WE MISS THIS

Ahewann, spilling curry down his front, bursting out of the throne room with laces untied: Hey Everybody Come Help Me Throttle The Spymaster

underrated part of the early DT MSQ was

• finding out that the super epic trailer solo fight in a super epic ancient temple against a supervillain two-headed mamool ja while everyone else was out there enjoying their vacation was actually the wol equivalent of having a piña colada on the beach

• because said two-headed mamool ja is actually an honest-to-gods hero and also the literal king and he invited you to a friendly duel because he's got the Mamool Ja zoomies and can tell you've got the wol zoomies as well (or. nyaswell. for our miqo'te and hrothgar wols)

• the whole thing acted as the somehow non-creepy equivalent of conservative dads wearing shirts that go like "whatever you do to my daughter i will do to you. act wisely"

• directly followed by a very earnest "what do you think of my daughter so far. shes a bit cringe right? but i believe in her" and "please protect and guide her well" speech combo

• which was interrupted by said daughter, very angry at both her dad and you for secretly fighting behind her back (peak teenager moment) in a way that suggested (especially considering the ongoing "dueling as a metaphor for sex") she was actually doing her utmost to not go

at the wol to their face

AND HOW COULD I FORGET

• learning like three weeks later that estinien not only did the same thing, at the king's behest, but that he was paid for his services (😏) and so generously at that that even estinien "it's only one hair tie, alphinaud. what could it possibly cost? 9,800 gil?" varlineau thought it was A Lot. while all we got was a parent-teacher conference post-sexually charged nonlethal duel

12/10 funniest duty ever

Mankind's First Hero, and his Final Hope!

Follow in the Light of the Crystal...